Toddler flaunts rebellion... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 02-01-2003, 03:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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OK, I know toddlers are busy little explorers BUT...my 18 mos old ds seems to look for trouble.

Her favorite game is to find the smallest object she can find (usually a lego), make sure we are looking (this is the key issue), put it in her mouth and RUN!

Yesterday she did the same thing with a CRAYON in her EAR!

She just seems to really love danger and testing limits.

The fundamental issues seem to be that safety is a game for her and I really don't want to be a momma that says "no" all the time.

I am afraid that we are setting up the dynamic that she is the trouble-maker and ds (5) is the good one. We definately give her lots of positive, focused attention, but to her the negative attention is just FUN.

Ds and I disagree somewhat. He thinks that we shouldn't give her attention for this stuff. For me, it is more a safety issue and I can't really ignore it (she is only 18 mos).

Ideas? Experience? Advice?

Thanks!

Clover
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#2 of 6 Old 02-01-2003, 05:28 PM
 
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Childproof again. It's a little unfair to the 5 yr old, but if you explain it well, he may be a willing participant. I assume the Legos and crayons are his items, so he'd have to have them put in a childproofed spot whenever he is not using them.

You can get crayons or chalk that are too big to choke on. I got some egg shaped chalk when my son was smaller because he used to throw everything down the old fashioned heating vents.
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#3 of 6 Old 02-01-2003, 05:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Great idea- our house does feel like a death trap sometimes. We try, we really do. Legos and such are kept in his room and he is usually pretty good about it.

I guess she is much more into exploring than ds was that I lack experience in this area. OTOH, she is so fun and funny and independent. She is just the type of child that needs more vigilance as regards to her safety.
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#4 of 6 Old 02-02-2003, 10:42 AM
 
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Does she possible just want you to chase her? My dd and I recently started playing "hide and seek". To teach her, I would say 'hide' and run and "hide" behind something (so that she could very easily find me) and make a big deal about it when she found me "YOU FOUND ME" and tickle/kiss her. Then she would run off and I'd run after and say "I FOUND YOU" tickle/kiss etc. We've now added counting to 10 and saying "ready or not, here I come". Now, out of the blue, she'll say "hide" and run away.

Also, you might be able to bring the legos and crayons etc. back out in just a couple of months. Seems like some of the toddler phases pass almost as quickly as they start.
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#5 of 6 Old 02-03-2003, 12:21 AM - Thread Starter
 
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She LOVES chase! Especially when it is time for a diaper change... She really likes to do this in stores, which is obviously horrifing. Usually I try to shop w/out children!

I guess I can't point to specific behaviors b/c they all seem pretty typical for the age. She is just busier than many I have met and definately more than my first! I find myself laughing a lot b/c what else can you do?

I suppose I am wondering if this is about personality or how much do parents actually encourage certain behaviors, however inadvertanty? Is there an age when kids just "get" safety? Or do some never get it?
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#6 of 6 Old 02-03-2003, 01:22 AM
 
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If she is anything like my guy, you always have to be on guard, especially when it gets quiet. There is no magic age, but it gets better. My guy is 3 now. He remembers the safety concerns that I've repeated a lot, but still manages to find new frightening things to do. Luckily, he still hasn't figured out the cupboard locks, even though he could physically do it if shown.

I try to shop without children too, or I give him a job to do now, like pushing the mini cart in the supermarket. Then I'm constantly telling him to watch out, or slow down, or no not that candy.
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