Lovey, Blankies, Teddies and the like - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 8 Old 03-04-2003, 06:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My 18-month-old son has never had an attachment item. Could have cared less about his blankie or any of his stuffed animals. All he has every really wanted for comfort was either my self or DH. I was like "yeah! This AP parenting really works! I have one attached son!

In mid January he started a toddler program 2 days a week for 4 hours a day. He adjusted well, appears to really love it and the teachers adore him. He barely cries when I leave (I usually just get a "bye Bye Mama". He seems happy and relaxed when he is picked up.

Well, in February he was given a small stuffed "Blue" from blues clues. He suddenly becomes very attached to her and she needs to go everywhere with us. Then he started calling one of his baby blankets "NaNa" and it to has to go everywhere too. To top it all off, his cousin sent him a little stuffed bunny and now "BunBun" has been added to the list. It is getting impossible to go anywhere because he try to hold onto all three at the same time and still get around. He gets very upset if I suggest we leave one behind or if I even carry them for him.

My question is this: Is this normal? Is it just that he is growing up? Or do you think I started him in this program to early and this is how it is manifesting itself? Is that why he suddenly needs a "lovey"? I am a WOHM but have never felt that this has caused any attachment issues. We have great routines for re-connecting and until now that all he needed. He has always slept easily and never had a problem adjusting to new things. I still feel he is really connected to DH and me but I am sensing that he now doesn't "need" as much. He is just as happy to sit and snuggle with "blue" or play Hide/Seek with "BunBun".

So am I being overly sensitive? Or do you think I tried to "socialize" too young so now he need familiar items to make him self feel safe??

Thanks for reading this far! I appreciate it.

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#2 of 8 Old 03-04-2003, 08:53 PM
 
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It's probably normal. My dd doesn't have any specific item she needs, but she loves her fleece blankets and likes to have them nearby. I think it's just that she likes the feel of them.
SARAH Mom to Aurora 6/11/01 and Genevieve edd 6/29/03
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#3 of 8 Old 03-05-2003, 01:13 AM
 
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My son has a menagerie. There are about 14 different items (several special blankets, a special pillow, and a bunch of animals) that he needs for sleeping. He is 2 and a half. He's gradually invited more and more items into his collection of important sleeping things, and I have know idea how he senses it- but he ALWAYS knows if just one is missing from the bed when we turn out the lights at night!
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#4 of 8 Old 03-05-2003, 01:47 AM
 
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My son has dragged the same "blankie" around for about 2 years now..... its knotted and NASTY, and will fall apart any day now - he has one KNOT on the darn thing that he holds ALL the time (caught him sticking it up his nose the other night )

I'm sure all hell will break loose when that disapears or totally falls apart.

Chelly
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#5 of 8 Old 03-05-2003, 02:15 AM
 
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I think it's normal.

Ds has a crocheted blankie that belonged to dh when he was a baby. We do not leave the house without the blankie. Period. We went to the park last week and he wanted to run around carrying it. Once I tried to run in and out of the post office with him and left the blankie in the car and he was almost hyseterical in the 30 seconds it took for me to check the post office box. Also in his crib he keeps another crocheted blanket, a book a teddy bear, the sleeve from the "Meet Joe" video and my pajama pants. I left the pants at the foot of my bed, where his crib is, and he dragged them in. I took them out and put them back and I just left them. Today I washed his bedding, including the crocheted crib blanket. He likes to "help" me load the dryer and he saw that blanket going in and ran off with it! It was only damp so I let him play with it and dh stuffed it in the dryer while I gave him a bath. Oh and washing "blankie?" Forget about it! I have to stuff it under my shirt to get it to the machine. Usually I just wait until I take him to MILs and have her wash it while he is busy playing with his aunts.
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#6 of 8 Old 03-05-2003, 12:30 PM
 
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Well Madyson had this problem a while ago. We just kept bringing the three things she wanted and eventually all three become interchangeable. Now she can bring any of the three(i ask her to choose) and she is happy. Most times though she doesn't even need a "lovey" becuase she just holds my hair. My hair has always been her "lovey" for the most part. We just had a small period of time where she really did NEED something. But just stick it out and they will give them up. Even VERY well-adjusted children need "lovies" as they grow older.
Meg and Madyson 7/23/00

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#7 of 8 Old 03-05-2003, 04:15 PM
 
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Emma started needing her "Pink STINK" as it is called in my family(a pink colored soft blankie) when she was eight months old and our family dog bit her in the face!Very tramatic experiance ( we no longer have the dog), Now I can't remeber her not needing that pink stink and it has evolved into many things to bed, like juice cup (water) puppy, baby ect. At each new phase in her life things become part of the ritual. The baby came as we got closer to having our newest baby. So I think it's normal and it really has help Emma through some major things.

Mama of 4 all born at home : Mothering
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#8 of 8 Old 03-05-2003, 05:16 PM
 
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It's normal!

Annika is a riot. She keeps adding and changing her collection of "must-have-to-sleep-eat-play-travel" items!! It's at least one baby doll and usually a few stuffed animals and her baby blankets (which she NEVER used as an infant). She brings about 4-5 things with her when she wakes up in the morning and comes to find me!! Her little arms are full.
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