DD freaks out when I take off her diaper - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 7 Old 09-12-2006, 10:01 PM - Thread Starter
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Mamas, please help me solve this gently.

DD just turned two. For the last month or so she has been just freaking out at bath time. She cries and cries the second I take her diaper off, and begs to have a new one put on. At this point she won't even get into the tub, I have to sponge bathe her.

She whimpers a little at diaper changes, too... but it doesn't turn into a full scale freak out b/c she gets a new one right away.

At first I thought she had a UTI or yeast infection or something (I posted about this a few weeks ago) but we've ruled that out.

I *think* she is afraid of having an accident while her diaper is off. She has had a few pooping in the tub incidents and they totally weirded her out... and a while back she was having naked/potty time and accidentally pooped on the floor, which made her cry hysterically.

For what it's worth, I've been calm and gentle and definitely not shaming about these accidents.

How to go forward? It's totally impossible to give her a bath right now. DH and I even tried getting naked (in solidarity with her) tonight for her bath, but she wasn't buying it.

Thanks, mamas.
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#2 of 7 Old 09-12-2006, 10:10 PM - Thread Starter
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Also -- we had a little talk tonight and she seemed to admit that she didn't like her diaper off... I talked about how it was okay to pee or poop when she didn't have a diaper on. She seemed to understand, but it's hard to tell if she's just agreeing with me or really getting it (she just turned 2).

I'll try to reinforce this message, that it's okay. And I think I won't call it an "accident", I'll just talk about it "sometimes happens". That feels like a less negative thing.

What do you think?
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#3 of 7 Old 09-12-2006, 10:29 PM
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My DS (22 months) went through the SAME thing. When we were potty training he freaked out the first time he accidentally peed on the floor. It seemed to really scare him. I would just say "whoopsy, that's okay sweetie, accidents happen." and basically act as though it was no big deal. He still freaked out when his diaper was off... no matter how non chalant I was.

He would even grab his penis and cry so that he wouldn't pee. He doesn't do daycare and is with me 24/7 so I know that nobody is making him feel bad about peeing... I couldn't figure it out.

Eventually he stopped doing it. I'm sorry I have no advice because I didn't do anything special to help him through it. Hopefully it will be the same for your daughter. You could try to change your wording like you said, maybe that will work!

Good Luck!

Mommy to THREE sweet boys & ONE sweet girl + a newb due in February!  I need a nap. 
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#4 of 7 Old 09-13-2006, 09:56 AM
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My ds hated the whole diaper change thing as well. I just started leaving it off to not to have to deal with the trauma of it all. But it sounds like that would be worse for yours. Have you introduced her to the potty? Perhaps let her know that if she has to go that is a place to go, just a thought.

Happily Married to my : 11 yrs- Mama to wild-eyed monkey boy 7-04, fiery little girl 4-07, and the happy smiley baby that sleeps 11-09!
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#5 of 7 Old 09-13-2006, 10:27 AM - Thread Starter
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we have introduced the potty. We read a book about it and she has actually pooped in it a few times.

I do ask her if she wants to use the potty now but she gives me an emphatic NO. I'm not going to push it, but I'll keep offering.

This morning I tried giving her some naked time. She didn't like it much, it only lasted about 10 minutes. I'll keep trying and maybe can extend the time period each time.
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#6 of 7 Old 09-13-2006, 10:56 AM
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bathtime is HORRIBLE around our house so I totally feel for you! Our solution is to go swimming LOTS and LOTS! That reduces the number of baths that we feel we have to give her and she does like the pool (as long as we go to the one that has the ramp entrance!)

Our DD also freaks out when she pees on the floor. The first time she pee'd diaper free it hit her feet and boy did she ever freak out. The hating of the bath started shortly after that. Poor little thing. I don't know if I got her bath too hot one night or what but it was an all of a sudden sort of a hatred here.

One thing we haven't tried but might work is to give our DD a bath with her swim diaper on. Maybe it would work for you? That way she could have a diaper on but you could get her nice and clean in the tub. You could just take the diaper off at the last minute to wash the diaper area and then out of the tub and into a diaper right away...
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#7 of 7 Old 09-13-2006, 11:16 AM
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My dd also hates to have her diaper off. I think she just doesn't like the feeling of being naked (maybe her butt is cold?) She is perfectly happy in underpants, so I usually put her in those (when she's awake and we're not going anywhere) so she can pull them down to use the potty.

She is not at all upset about having "accidents"... yesterday when I asked her if she needed to pee on the potty, she responded: "No! Pee on floor!" very emphatically, pointing at the living room carpet...
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