*~*In like a Lion! March thread for May 04 Mamas!*~* - Page 9 - Mothering Forums

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Old 03-22-2007, 02:25 PM
 
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I know I haven't been a major participant in this thread BUT seeing as you ALL have children around L's age I NEED some advice. Our dog ran away and was hit a few weeks back THEN a plug sparked and siezed in her bedroom JUST after we put her to bed. NOW she doesn't want to sleep in her "Big girl" bed and she tells me it scares her. I am trying to come up with a GOOD solution so I can get a little sleep at night. I get her feet in my back and DH's arm shoving me back over into her. If I put her in the middle of our bed I am afraid that DH would beat her up in his sleep the same way he does me. Do you think I could switch my children into the empty bedroom in our home? Does anybody think this would help my poor sweet little Lilly? I am desperate for ANY kind of humane solution.
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Old 03-22-2007, 02:48 PM
 
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FishBike, I am hearin ya. I think I would keep your eye on the goal (that she sleep happily in her room again someday) and work toward it, sharing verbally all the way. First step: doesn't work for mom n dad that you sleep in our bed. I am not getting enough sleep because we're too crowded and that makes mama grouchy. What can we do? a) just two nights (or whatever), you can sleep in this little sweet nest we are going to make just for you right over here in this corner/beside my bed/whatever. or b) Do you want to change your room to the other bedroom? In that room, things do not explode, not scary. (but if the goal is to get her back into her room maybe talk about how that just happened once, and won't happen again because X)

Just a couple ideas/framework about how she can have some control over the decisions and process as it happens...? hope it helps...
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Old 03-22-2007, 03:01 PM
 
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I have explained that the plug was fixed and it won't happen again. Since it was our electric supplier that caused the surge and they fixed it outside as well as US replacing the plug etc in the house. I offered that she could sleep on the couch. She asked for the couch, but when we got there she wasn't happy with that option either. She has TWO beds in her room as it is. Her actual bed and a matress on the floor. If I had the room I'd put the matress in MY bedroom. I just can't find a spot for it. DH rocked her to sleep lastnight BUT she woke back up. I am going to see if switching rooms is an option that she wants to try. I just NEED some sleep soon. I can't keep going on NO sleep.
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Old 03-22-2007, 03:21 PM
 
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can you fit in her bed with her and sleep in her room for a little while to build up her confidence??
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Old 03-22-2007, 05:03 PM
 
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I wish, I am not able to sleep in a toddler bed WITH the toddler very well. I think I may have come up with a solution. I re-opened the nursery where the baby and I used to sleep. I pulled the cover off the rocking chair and ottoman as well as put Lilly's cousin's bed back together (we have a bed for when she stays). There is a slight chance that I can get her to sleep in Haley's bed. Especially since the nursery doesn't have a door on it. I'll no longer have a place to sew BUT I feel it's worth the sacrafice right now. If she's in the nursery I can sleep on the floor next to her. It's a bigger room.
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Old 03-22-2007, 09:08 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elsanne View Post
I kind of like the a-synchronized produce, watching & waiting for that poetic moment when they are all together, then going off on their own rhythms again...
You know, I don't need another reason to sit here staring at my monitor for ... hours ... waiting ... for ... synchronization. I do the same thing at traffic lights with people's left turn blinkers. It's maddening.

Quote:
Originally Posted by afishwithabike View Post
Do you think I could switch my children into the empty bedroom in our home? Does anybody think this would help my poor sweet little Lilly? I am desperate for ANY kind of humane solution.
fish, I'm a relative newcomer to this thread, so I don't know your situation - how old are your kids? (I am bright enough to imagine that one of them is almost three.) Is your maybaby the oldest? Is she in a toddler bed or a twin? It sounds like you've got a workable solution already, so it may not matter anyway... If you're looking to keep her in her current room for the long run, I'd try to work toward supporting her in being comfortable there, even if it means lying down on the floor together. If you're good with her moving to the other room permanently, then I'd work that angle, but if you want her to get BACK into her current room, it might be hard for her to transition twice.
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Old 03-22-2007, 09:54 PM
 
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Yeah sorry, Lilly is the nearly three year old. My guy is the younger at 19 1/2 mos. I am NOT attached to where they sleep really. NOT until they're older will I really care. I just want them happy for now. I haven't done any real decorating or anything because I want THEM to choose how they want to sleep. As it is the nursery was closed up because Lilly asked if her brother could sleep in her room when she was going through the "There are Monsers in my room" phase. For some reason there were "monsers" everywhere for a while. Now the "monsters" are gone and she's scared of her bedroom. That is what she told DH and I last night. I really don't know why exactly because she couldn't tell me why. She has mentioned the plug fire as well as our recently deceased dog. I am not sure which is triggering this BUT it NEEDS to be addressed. I am going to see if she'll sleep in her cousin's toddler bed tonight and if it works I'll move her car bed over. I just don't want to move that monstrosity of a toddler bed unless I KNOW it will work. Currently she just fell asleep on the couch. If I have to leave her there so be it. I just want to make sure she knows that I love her and I'm there for her. I am just having issues because I am losing a LOT of sleep.
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Old 03-23-2007, 10:52 AM
 
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Fishwithabike, I wish I had some advice for you! A lot of the thoughts here seem great! Rowan is afraid of some stuff nowadays (the aquarium, yo!) but luckily, nothing at bedtime yet. Sorry if this has already been suggested or is not an option, but what about a mattress in your room? She can sleep near you but not ON you, ifyaknowwhatImean.
Rowan would just climb right out off the mattress and onto us, but you know, it's a thought...

Speaking of weird sleeping arrangements, we are going away to our regional LLL conference tonight (MA, VT, RI represent! ) and will be spending the night in a hotel room until tomorrow...and for the first time, we are NOT bringing the pack & play! He's SO outgrown it, so there's no point.
So, we thought (for about a second) of getting him to sleep with us, but Rowan in our bed=NO SLEEP FOR ANYONE.
But our room is going to have a pull-out couch, which we thought would make a good little nest for him, and it's obviously not too far from us, and one of us could even sleep with him if it comes to that. Thanks to the nap thing not happening much lately (try EVER...the past few days we've just had "quiet time", which is working surprisingly well, actually) he goes to sleep at night much quicker, and is even sleeping better...weirdness.

So um, yeah. And we are planning a BIG trip in late July (Hawaii!!! My IL's sprung it on us a week ago or so...I am still in shock!) and we are going to pack as lightly as is reasonable for such a big/long trip. Here's the maiden voyage.

Anyway, in other news, I got my lip pierced last night. Because I am SO hardcore. It's neat to have a piercing in my face again (I used to have like 4) Rowan made me fall out of the rocking chair this morning though, when he said "Mama, what's on your lips?" I told him, "I got my lip pierced last night, it's like an earring, and it's a boo-boo so you can't touch it for a while" and he said "oh, like Daisy!" And for a second I was like "HUH??" :
And he said again "Like DAISY!" And then I realized what he was talking about: Davey Havok, my recent rock n' roll obsession. AFI's lead singer.
He has his lower lip pierced on the RIGHT side. Mine's on the left. I was like "HOLY CRAP! Are you that inundated with my musical tastes that you REMEMBER that this guy has a piercing like mine!?!?" Biz-ARRE!
So I said "yes, yes, like Davey" : How awesome.

Anyway, there's my funny story for the day. Much love to you all, have a great weekend! I will most likely not be back on the internets until sometime Saturday night.

MMF!
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Old 03-23-2007, 11:18 AM
 
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My kids love sharing a room. I love sleeping with them, until you hit the point where nobody sleeps but the acrobatic toddler. Then, not so much. How did it go last night?

Renae, HAVE FUN at the conference! If you're worried about R rolling off the bed, you could pull the dinky mattress off the pull-out couch and put it in the floor. It might be more comfy that way anyway? Have fun have fun have fun!!
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Old 03-23-2007, 12:00 PM
 
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Hey Juice (and other mamas in this sitch) when did your two oldest start sleeping together in peaceful harmony? When can I kick these monkeys outta my bed, is what I REALLY wanna know?

jk, kinda....so far I LOVE sleepin' with them but I just know there will come a day....
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Old 03-23-2007, 03:05 PM
 
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lately isaac calls out to me ~4am and i go in his room and he says 'you lay down with me' and when i get in bed he goes 'i need to snuggle' and he nuzzles in and then we both roll over and go back to sleep. moving him to the full bed was the best maneuver. i couldn't quite get comfy with him in the twin.

i hope lilly took to her cousin's bed last night.

yaaaaaaaaaaay friday! and i'm taking a 4 day weekend so i am even more 'yay!' wooo wooooo

babe is moving all over the place again. which is kind of a relief to me. i really can't wait to not be pregnant anymore. i forgot how you get SO uncomfortable that you really don't care how much birthing hurts

we had an almost electrical trauma last night. our friend - god love 'im - is working on our house (well we're paying him). so yesterday he was ripping out old siding and plaster and lathe. we're finishing off our back porch to be laundry room/mud room. and so he did something funky with some wires he encountered and none of the lights upstairs worked anymore. so he showered and left (!!!!). i'm amazed the place didn't burn to the ground. then doug comes home and flips the switch on the breaker box which starts sparking. and calls to tell me this. fabulous darling! somehow he figured it out before i got home from work. great fun. more male nesting. this project is so not in the budget :
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Old 03-23-2007, 03:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Male nesting! Love it!

My two girls started sharing a bed about three or four months ago. It's something they chose for themselves. They wanted to do it, so we just ran with it. I have no idea how they would have done earlier in the game.

Jstar-you never let us know how Modest Mouse was!

And heather, how ya doing? :
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Old 03-23-2007, 04:03 PM
 
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the show was fun. not enough old songs but i them. it was supercute- they had a nautical theme with all these lanterns and striped sailor shirts. i think i'm done with concertgoing for the remainder of this pregnancy though. i was fine through the show but my back and hips actually felt sore the next day from standing so long. (probably a sad reflection of how out of shape i am getting from not exercising at all....my good intentions are GONE)

isaac knows when modest mouse comes on the radio. or if i play the cd. kinda like your afi thing renae he knows we went to see modest mouse last week. and that isaac brock is the singer
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Old 03-23-2007, 05:57 PM
 
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marek recognizes most any guster song, and knows the names and faces of all the guster guys: "that's... adam! that's... ryan! that's... brian! that's joe!"

: on the electrical thing, jstar...

fishwithbike: no thoughts on that one. after the newbie was born, we went through about 4 months of marek waking up way too much during the night. also a lot of "that's scary". we just kept reassuring him that he would be okay, that we understood he was scared but that we were there to take care of him and everything would be okay. hope you find a good and sleep-allowing solution soon.

must finish my lunch while they are both still napping...

~claudia
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Old 03-24-2007, 04:26 PM
 
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I went through ALL the trouble of opening up the nursery and she wanted to sleep on the couch. I have been letting her because I am tired of NOT sleeping at night. If she can live with it then so can I.
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Old 03-25-2007, 01:57 AM
 
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I'm in a fretful space right now. I've been pushing myself, although I didn't think I was really overdoing it. But in the past month I've had several episodes of spotting, once after exercising, once during a conference where I wasn't able to take breaks or naps, and now today, after basically doing nothing but having a family day with my guys at the children's museum. I'm tired, but that's normal, right? I cut way back on the exercise, I'm trying to take naps when I can, and I'm not lifting anything heavy other than my son (who's probably about 40lbs now, give or take). I don't want to quit everything, I really believe that moderate physical activity is healthy for a pregnancy. I hate to think of what more I could do to prevent this spotting. And since it takes hours to see my midwives without an appointment, I'm loathe to go in unless I really think there's something wrong. I guess I need someone to talk some sense into me. This sucks.
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Old 03-25-2007, 02:31 AM
 
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EL- sounds like you're listening to your body. good for you.

i'm such a folk girl- L's favorite song is currently michelle shocked's Arkansas Travelor. Sample lyric: "Hey farmer, when you gonna fix that leaky roof?" "Well, stranger, when it's rainin, it's too wet to fix it, anf when it's dry, it's just as good as any man's house."

ok, got toddler tag team duty- bye!
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Old 03-25-2007, 02:37 AM
 
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OH emmalola I hope one of our midwifin' chicas get on here and assuage your fears. I have heard many women say they "spotted throughout their whole pregnancy"...
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Old 03-25-2007, 03:59 PM
 
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...

mom of  dust.gif, ROTFLMAO.gif, and jog.gif
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Old 03-25-2007, 11:42 PM
 
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I think I have figured it out. All that medical education hasn't been wasted. what a relief, I think. I think the bleeding is from an internal hemorrhoid, which I will confirm with the midwives when I get a chance to go in. Until then, I will eat more prunes, you know?

But until then, the lentil has a nasty case of stomach yuckies. Up all night, throwing up giant chunks of carrot. It was gross. Today he's feeling better, with a low-grade fever and occasional pukies. And he's back in diapers because he's got this gross diarrhea. When it rains, it pours around here!

and it took me so long to reply, my server timed me out. typical.
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Old 03-26-2007, 01:13 AM
 
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Ugh, EL, sorry about the rain. I hope the bleeding is "just" a hemorrhoid. It probably is. Good idea to get it checked out to make sure. I would say that a little vaginal spotting is not necessarily a horrible thing, but a little regular exercise shouldn't bring it on. Sometimes women get little sub-chorionic hemorrhages that are nothing to worry about, but it's a good idea to get it checked out. Ruling out the 'roids is a good idea. And that's about the extent of my current knowledge.

Jstar's shower was absolutely fab. Delicious scones and tea. You have fun friends, Jess!

As for me, life is, um, weird. It's kinda strange having my mom here for a month. Feels like I'm on vacation, but I'm not, and it's hard keeping my normal life on schedule. Luckily I'm on Spring Break next week but I still have tons of crap to do and I'm not really motivated. I just want to garden and craft and take advantage of my mom watching Lily to do fun things. It is so nice to have her here and Lily loves her. Right now she is giving Lily a bath and there are belly laughs drifting from the bathroom. Sooo cute.

OK, must go. Lots of house/garden/chicken planning going on and DH wants my attention. Oh yeah, we are getting chickens! This week! Eeeeek.

S.
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Old 03-26-2007, 01:43 AM
 
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Hello everyone. I dissapeared for awwhile though I was actually here. Just a reallly frantic week and about to start another one. I told N's teacher that I just couldn't do the gardening this week. One thing too many.

My chiropracter moved 25 minutes away where he used to be just 5 and I am really hesitant to drive that far even though it would only be every other week. I am just not a fan of driving. It tires me out KWIM. But then again he seems to be the only network chiropracter in town so what do I do?

BTW Ms Juice my kids call him the pirate cracker!
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Old 03-26-2007, 10:00 AM
 
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EL, s and thoughts! Hopefully you can get the bleeding straightened out. I still remember when I was pg that I spotted whenever I over-exerted myself...not a LOT, but it happened. I went to the doc the first time, but then I was pretty confident it was the same thing when it happened a couple times later. Internal hemorrhoid?? Whoah. I have only experienced your run-of-the-mill hemorrhoids.
And with the sickies. I hope your boy feels better soon!

Hmm. we've had a long weekend too, and today Rowan says "i'm going slow, Mama!" Yeah, honey, we ALL are...hehe. He's watching Sesame, I'm making a mix CD for a friend's birthday (and I have one due to some ladies in another forum too! Ack! : I'm getting to it! It's gonna be AFI-heavy, I warn you!) Hah. So yeah, so cute to hear our little ones who know our music. Yesterday my phone rang and I have an AFI ringtone, and Rowan says "Mama, Davey's callin' you!" And I was like, "I WISH!"
I like Guster. I don't know much of their music but what I have heard, I like. Modest Mouse is not something I've gotten into, but again, what I have heard, I like okay.
I remember when I knew I was done with concerts during pregnancy...DH and I saw A Perfect Circle when I was about 6 months along. And we had SEATS, and I was STILL like, "ugh, NO more shows for a while!

So, the conference was....okay, I guess. The very last session I attended made the whole thing worth it, so I think I may go to the Sunday sessions next year, and I will go ALONE. Rowan had fun but it was a wild ride. DH also had a good time, we enjoyed being out of the house for a night, and we took Juice's suggestion (thank you!) and put the pull-out's mattress on the floor. He was SO excited about his "new bed!" and he jumped all over it, lay there for stories, and went right to sleep on it. But then, he was waking up every couple hours or so. I also didn't sleep well, so we were eager to go home to our beds the next day. Hah. So thanks for the suggestions! Glad to know you're working out some sort of sleep arrangements, too, fishwithabike! We didn't use the nursery for SO LONG...
Sleep deprivation...ugh. DH and I were remembering that last night for some reason, remembering how he would fall asleep ON THE ROAD : and I would sleep sitting up on the couch, child at my breast. I was practically hallucinating those early days. I know you know what I mean.

Okay, Rowan is looking for me so I had better go. I also have to get coffee #2! Oh man. He was just whining about how "the mirror PINCHED ME!" (our full length wall mirror) and I asked him how, and he said "I was trying to get it down (ie., PRY IT OFF THE WALL!!! And I said "well, if you leave it ALONE, it won't pinch you!" He kind of looked at me like "um...okay" and walked away. Dude.

Have a wonderful day, wonderful mamas.

OH! And CHICKENS!!! Sarah, you have NO IDEA how jealous I am! I adore me some chickens. DH thinks I'm

p.s. Damn, my lip hurts. : But it's worth it! I look cool!
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Old 03-26-2007, 12:27 PM
 
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Renae, I forgot you got your lip pierced! whoa dude! Are you on the tattooed & pierced tribe? Because you should be!

I have nothing tattooed or pierced, except for the run-of-the-mill ears. If anything I'd get my nose pierced for bellydance and a cool tattoo (again for bellydance) on my rump (well, that beautiful curve above it, visible) that somehow represented my two chitlins.

I am in strange ways conservative.

Sarah, I had me some hens in Arizona, pre-Mexico. I had six and their names were Mary Margaret, Phoebe, Henny Penny, Virginia, ack. Can't remember the other two at the moment. I LOVED feeding them chicken scraps, deep yellow yolks, and one of them laid GREEN eggs! Araucana I think is the breed, a beautiful hen. I LOVED it. And Viet has been prepping a little piece of yard/cage for some hens here--yay! I loved when they would dust-bathe (I let them out of their cage every day) and just lay their looking strangely wounded in the dirt, but in total ecstasy.
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Old 03-26-2007, 06:04 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey mamas!

Thinking of you el-I hope the spotting resolves. how stressful, and I hope the lentil recovers from his bug.

Sarah-sorry you have work to do when you'd rather be hanging with Mom.

cute pix of hippos, heather!

TC-thinking of you, mama. How're you doing these days?

Renae-you just rawk with your piercing and tattoing ol' self!

jstar-can't believe how close you're getting!

beth-how's it going with the new little man? And Lisa? Hows Alison and new baby A doing?

Not much going on here. I'm in a major funk, and can't seem to shake it. : I feel I'm constantly snapping at the kids or talking to them in a less-than-desirable tone lately. Everything just bugs me. I get this way every now and then, and I hate it. I'm soooo tired of all the snow that's taking far too long to melt. We still have a few inches of snow on the ground, and the places that aren;t covered with now are all soggy and muddy, so we can't go out to play. I'm sooo dreaming of summer time! Speaking of, lets talk fences-anyone have a fenced in backyard? I'd really love to fence in ours for several reasons. My backyard neighbors have an above-ground pool, and I'm a little wary of it, because their yard isn't fenced. They have a deck on the pool with a ladder that folds up, but still....maybe I'm just uptight. But I worry the fence will make us look like snobs, or unapproachable or something. I really want it for safety reasons, and to keep my kids contained a bit. What do you all think of fences/fence owners? I would just like a picket fence or soemthing similar.
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Old 03-26-2007, 07:15 PM
 
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Sherri, our back and side yards are fenced in (tall fence). Most people here have a fence, but I believe we are required by law because we have a pool. I'm sort of surprised your neighbors with the pool aren't required to fence in their yard. Maybe that's just a CA law?

We also have our front yard fenced in. It's a a short fence and you can see through it - like a metal grate style. I'll take a pic of it (when it stops raining) so you can see. I LOVE our front yard fence. It allows me to send the kids out in the yard and not have to worry about them running in the street.
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Old 03-26-2007, 08:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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mamameg, I'm not sure if they're required by law to have a fence around the pool since it is above ground and access to the pool is gained by pulling down the ladder and climbing it to the deck of the pool, if that makes any sense. Also, around the top of the pool itself is a lattice-type screen, which I imagine is supposed to deter people from climbing in it. I totally hear you on the fence being nice so kids don't run off into the road. Its a big reason for me wanting one. Also, my kitchen is in the back of the house, so if the backyard were fenced, I could run in the house and prep dinner a bit and keep an eye on the kids through the window.
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Old 03-26-2007, 09:02 PM
 
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We have a fence around our backyard. Well actually two of our neighbors (back and side) have tall fences, so those serve as fences for us, and we put up another little fence joining our neighbor's fence to our porch and a little gate on the other side so the side yard is enclosed. Then our garage serves basically as a fence to the other side. Anyway, we really like it and I feel good letting Lily play out there for a short bit without us. She usually just stays on the porch but when we're all outside I can focus on gardening or whatever while she wanders around. The front yard is not fenced but she is really good about staying on the sidewalk. I definitely don't let her out of my sight, though, and never let her in the front without someone out there with her.

The pool would scare me, too. That reminds me, we had to remind MIL last summer not to let Lily play in the kiddie pool without direct supervision. She actually asked me if it was ok if she was working in the front while Lily was splashing around, and I was like, Um no and I was so mad. This is one reason why she doesn't watch her very often anymore.

Ooops gotta go to the chiro...aaaaaaah.

S.
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Old 03-26-2007, 09:54 PM
 
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We are fenced in on all sides with tall fences. I don't think it matters here if the pool is above ground, it is supposed to have a fence.
And I let my kids play in the backyard and I go in and out. Obviously N is older but we have a lot of windows in the back and they just play out there independantly. But now if we set up the pool obviously.
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Old 03-27-2007, 03:21 AM
 
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My .02 about the fence: a nice, low-ish see-through type fence is not snobbery, it's safety.

Sarah: MIL: duh!

My house (and pool: ) are all fenced. To the outside, a huge big wall so none see in, I don't see out. Around the pool a little white picket fence. No water in the pool, btw, never will be. No heater. unheated pool = uh uh.
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