DS doesn't want to nap - Mothering Forums

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Old 06-12-2003, 11:29 AM - Thread Starter
 
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This has been coming up slowly, but it's now in full. DS is refusing to take a nap! He refuses to do the things that will calm him down and where he will fall asleep. This isn't him not needing a nap anymore because he is very tired. He is just whining instead of going to sleep now.

I'm at my wit's end. I almost want to do one of those non-AP things and put him alone in a room where he would not have anything to do and might fall asleep. But I won't do that. I just have to figure something out because the whining is really getting to me.

To make it worse, nap-time is my me-time. I come here to MDC while DS naps. I need my me-time.

: madrone - : SAHM to 12 y.o. DS, : 9 y.o. DD, and : 4 y.o. DS
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Old 06-12-2003, 12:05 PM - Thread Starter
 
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He is thankfully napping right now. I kept telling him that I would not do ___ because I wanted and he needed a nap, so he decided to go outside, but I had locked the door. He had a tantrum and ended up taking the breast in trying to calm down from that. Three hours of him fighting fatigue led up to this. Once he starts getting tired, he asks to bf. And then he runs off as soon as my milk comes in, leaving me full and leaking.

I kind of feel like I'm letting him be the parent or something, but I am trying to be gentle. I don't know whether he will be able to learn the consequences of not napping at 25 months. And it makes me so grumpy and miserable along with him.

Advice? Ideas?

: madrone - : SAHM to 12 y.o. DS, : 9 y.o. DD, and : 4 y.o. DS
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Old 06-13-2003, 03:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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A bump. Anyone have advice? Anyone?

: madrone - : SAHM to 12 y.o. DS, : 9 y.o. DD, and : 4 y.o. DS
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Old 06-13-2003, 04:41 PM
 
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I have the same problem with my April 2001 DS. He won't nurse long enough to fall asleep at naptime anymore. The only way he will currently take a nap is to put him in his high chair with a few snacks in front of a calming video. If I try to hold him he jumps up when he starts to fall asleep. The highchair is the only way he sits still long enough to fall asleep -at least without screaming. Our high chair reclines so when he starts to nod off I recline it and then once he is completely asleep I carry him to the bed. It may not be the AP solution but at least he doesn't cry and is happy this way. The only other thing that works right now is a car ride.

At night time he still nurses to sleep easily.

Good luck, hope you find something that works for you.

Kaye

Part-time L&D RN and Full-time Mama to Xander 4/01 & Carly 6/08
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Old 06-14-2003, 01:55 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you for responding AZDesertrn. It's conforting to know I'm not alone. And our sons were born in the same month. Maybe it's the age. Or the stars.

The only thing that I always have that I could put him in where he couldn't leave is the backpack. Perhaps I will give that a try. I have to get him to start calming down somehow.

: madrone - : SAHM to 12 y.o. DS, : 9 y.o. DD, and : 4 y.o. DS
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Old 06-14-2003, 06:14 PM
 
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My ds is another April'01 child. We have been dealing with the nap thing for many, many months now. What I finally did (after NOTHING else worked) was to just give up. Not the best solution for many, but it has worked okay for us. I don't even offer a nap unless I am sure he will sleep. It became a huge issue and was causing too much stress for all involoved. I didn't like what it was doing to our relationship or how I was mothering him. Something had to give, so I chose the nap.

Now, here is what we do now.......if ds has had a really long or busy morning we will spend some wind down time, usuallly we start with painting or colouring then progress to reading a few stories. If he seems receptive to the idea of sleep I will sell him on some "quiet time" in the bedroom nursing (I only do this if I know he will sleep, once we've committed to the bedroom we don't get up again until he naps otherwise he will just try to get up again every nap/bed time for weeks to come). If I think he won't go easily (which is most days) I set him up with a snack and a video (one of the only times we do videos) just so that he has some time to recharge. Now that we have been doing this for a while he will actually ask for a snack and video when he is starting to get tired on occasion. He will even put his head down on the futon while he watches (won't doze off though) and really rests. Those days he just won't nap, but will likely end up going to bed early.

I wish I could say this was a great system, but it does have its advantages. He will fall asleep by 7 or 8 most nights without a nap so dh and I get to enjoy our evenings together (when he does nap he will be up till 10 or 11). Unfortunately, even when he is really, really tired he will sometimes refuse all attempts at sleep so he will crash out at 5 pm which messes up our whole schedule. Also, many early evenings are spent trying to devise ways to keep him up another half hour or hour so that he will sleep till morning. It also makes it difficult for us to make plans for the evening as ds will often need to be in bed half-way through family gatherings. Plus LLL meetings are in the evening, so we can't go unless he has napped. Those days I try to exhaust him in the morning with even more physical activity then usual in hopes he will nap, but it doesn't always work.

Don't know if any of this will help, but at least I can offer you the knowledge that you are not alone. Keep trying, and I am sure you will come up with a solution that is at least somewhat workable for you

Laurie


 

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Old 06-14-2003, 06:43 PM
 
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My son went through about 6 changes in sleeping habits in his 3 years. I just went with the flow. If it appears that your little one is whining and not sleeping during his normal nap time, my suggestion is to put him down a little earlier. Start with 30 minutes before you usually used to put him down, and then if that goes well, try 1 hour before. Sometimes, for whatever reason, kids will change on you, but in my personal experience I felt that my son was getting more physically active as he got older, thus his sleeping habits changed with the exertion. Keep us posted about what you try...
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