Toddler ALWAYS getting hurt? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 10 Old 09-18-2007, 04:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have 2 kids. My DS, my first is 12 now, and when he was a toddler we never "babyproofed" anything other than under the sink, where the cleaning supplies were. He very very seldom got hurt at all either. Worst case he would fall off a little tykes tractor or something onto the carpet. Maybe got bruised/cut a half a dozen times going through toddlerhood.

Fast forward to now... I have a 23 mo old girl. She is OBSESSED with being dangerous. She moves waaay too fast, climbs EVERY SINGLE THING, has NO fear what so ever. She has a black and blue mark on her somewhere at any given point. I feel like I'm such a bad mommy. But its not like I'm not watching her. She just has NO fear what so ever. For instance... she climbed on the coffee table (which we only have in the living room if we're using it, because otherwise she is on it too much). She dives off onto an adult's lap (wether we expected it or not). So that works, so she dives straight onto the couch. Ok that works, so next she DIVES onto the FLOOR!!! (yes she actually does this, and it takes her about a half second to get onto the coffee table and then back off onto the floor). She has also leaned over the arm of the couch until she fell over on her head (this was the scariest one... she passed out for what seemed like forever but was probably just a few seconds). Last night she grabbed a doll from her nursery and then was following me to our bedroom and somehow fell and hurt her leg enough to have 2 big purple spots on it (that went away about 20 min later). I was RIGHT in front of her, and even went back into the room after she was asleep to see what she fell over and there was nothing there at all.

I could go on forever with this. We have padded and secured every bit of furniture, removed end tables and coffee tables and foot stools from our living room, moved our furniture flush against the walls (so she doesnt try to walk along the back anymore : ) Is this normal? Its just horrible, and many of the times when something happens to her, I am < 2 ft away, but she is so unpredictable and fast that I never know what she is going to attempt until its too late. I'm hoping its a phase and she will figure out that these things hurt and she shouldn't do them before something bad happens, but this is night and day to my DS who never had nearly this daredevil attitude.
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#2 of 10 Old 09-18-2007, 04:26 PM
 
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Hey-I just posted a thread about accident-prone kids in parenting issues! My own dd2, 26 mos., is a danger toddler, too. It is just about making me crazy! On Sunday I took her to the ER for the 5th time in her short little life. And I wouldn't call mine a daredevil, but she just keeps getting hurt...or very sick. It's like everything happens to her that happens to most toddlers, but exponentially, if that makes sense.

I too feel just about crazy with it.

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#3 of 10 Old 09-18-2007, 04:28 PM
 
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I could have written your post about our ds - quite honestly it is a nightmare with everything that's happened, teeth through his tongue, teeth through his lip, dived out of the pushchair onto the concrete supermarket floor, I dispare - I have no idea how to calm him down - i guess he will at some point - he's always getting into something or another. You're not a bad mum just sometimes our kids are alittle more livewires than we expect!! I have found out that taking them out to the park for at least two hours, or a long walk in the forest helps with getting rid of the daredevil energy - but not always. Hugs to you - it's difficult but us mamas of daredevils understand and know what you're going through!

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#4 of 10 Old 09-18-2007, 04:44 PM
 
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DS#2 is the same way, and I'm also at my wits end. His older brother outweighs him by a good 20 lbs., and my two and 1/2 year old will dive at him in all-out attack mode. He climbs the furniture, jumps off, dives into things... His front tooth is broken, and he is literally covered with marks and bruises. He has no fear whatsoever. I'm really hoping he outgrows this, but maybe he won't if this is his "personality". This terrifies me- I will not let this kid get a driver's license until he's 30!

I really have no idea how to address this. He tunes out yelling (from me, anyway). I've tried removing him from the situation, putting him in a time out, trying to get him focused on something else- He needs tons of activity, but I can't exactly take him outside to run him around at night.

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#5 of 10 Old 09-18-2007, 06:09 PM
 
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Sounds normal to me.

Mama of three.
 
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#6 of 10 Old 09-18-2007, 07:11 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by elmh23 View Post
Sounds normal to me.
I agree. My son is also a daredevil, and consequently is always falling and scraping or buising his face (since he seems to like to break his fall with his face first ) Some children are just really active and no matter how much of a bubble you want to put them in to protect them, they're going to go at it full swing. For example, the last black eye my son had was from head butting me in the mouth (accidently) while he was running to me to give me a hug. I felt like such a bad mommy! But it's just how he is - very active and 100% go go go.

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#7 of 10 Old 09-18-2007, 08:34 PM
 
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My older dd is the same...nonstop action and the bumps/bruises to prove it. I actually worry sometimes that a stranger will think we're putting her in harms way. Last night after her bath I counted 14 bruises on knees, shins, elbows, and forehead! So I understad the "bad mommy" feelings. I wish I could keep her totally safe but she is a very out-there and active little girl. Her bumps don't worry her so I'm working on accepting that this is who she is...dare devil gung ho adventure grrl who will always need a good health insurance provider.

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#8 of 10 Old 09-18-2007, 10:49 PM
 
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I am going through the same with DS who is 18 months. My only advice is that we took all food coloring, sugar, and high fructose corn syrup out of his diet. He is still fearless and creative in his playing choices but he is no longer hyperactive with a death wish. We find he also listens more and doesnt tune us out when this happens. My last piece of advice is to have a danger word that your dd knows means business. I say "no" so much he tunes it out. When I say "stop" he stops because I am serious. The key is I only use stop when he is in danger like sticking a screwdriver into a light socket or running in the street.: It is nice to know we aren't alone.
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#9 of 10 Old 09-19-2007, 09:02 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you so much for all of the responses!! It really feels better to know that I'm not alone. The funny thing is, that over all DD is very mellow, its just that when she decides to do something, she is single minded in her determination (like flying off the furniture) and my 12 yr old is the one with ADHD that cannot stand still and is bouncing off the walls. Of course in our house how this plays out is 12 yr old gets 2 yr old riled up, and then she gets hurt pretty much every single time.

megadoula, thats a good point on safe words. I say "ouch" if something is dangerous, and sometimes I'm too late, which I think has brought the idea home to her, and sometimes she actually listens. I'm with you though... yelling and "no" are completely tuned out. I don't like to yelling so try not to yell at her if I can help it, but it still doesnt seem to work. (although my 12 yr old will argue with any comment - and I do mean ANY - unless its atleast a full octave or more above the tone of his voice..but thats another thread lol)
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#10 of 10 Old 09-19-2007, 11:11 AM
 
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My son is like that. He's a bit over 2.5 now. It's gotten better as his judgment has improved. He is in gymnastics and I make sure he has a chance to go diving regularly -- off the diving board, headfirst, twisting, etc. The other thing I try to do is I try to, if the injury is not going to do him serious damage, simply warn him in a not-emotionally-involved way if possible. Sure, there are days I will tell him "I don't want you doing that because we have to leave the house in 10 minutes and I'm tired." But if it's something that will likely cause a bruise, scrape, etc. I will simply say, "If you keep doing that X might happen" or "Watch out that you don't cause Y result". Because I believe that if I stop him or exaggerate, like some parents say "No you can't jump off that wall because you will kill yourself", he won't respect my opinions and he won't develop judgment.

I think he's developing very nice judgment.

However, the coordinated brave kids are likely to always have a scrape or bruise because they get out there.
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