boys peeing outside in public - Page 3 - Mothering Forums

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#61 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 02:36 PM
 
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As for 'disgusting and gross and unacceptable' and it "being indecent exposure and a criminal offence" - they are KIDS for crying out loud.
Even here, the police have way way more on their hands than a 3 year old pee ing in the park in an emergency.
I don't have a problem with a parent allowing a child to do this is an emergency and anyone who does should read pixiepunk's posting.


As for 'how about an adult' - well I would have thought that obvious difference is that adults have fully developed larger bladders and have physiologivcally developed bladder control.
I for one have not become so "precious" that seeing a toddler peeing beind a tree in a park disgusts me.
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#62 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 02:47 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Margarita26 View Post
i dont think her point was that parenthood should be easy, i think she's just trying to illustrate why some parents choose to let their child pee in a park once in awhile.
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As the mother of 3 boys and now a daughter as well, I am SHOCKED by all the posters proclaiming disgust. My 3 boys, all fully potty trained now, all have at one time or another had to make use of a tree or bush at one time or another. It's not like you are going out there and saying, "Hey, let's go to the park to pee on some trees today kids!" It is done out of necessity.

I think this thread is going .

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#63 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 02:50 PM
 
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My son is 3 and potty trained. This has just never been an issue. If he needs to pee, we find a restroom. Same as I would do for myself.
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#64 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 02:52 PM
 
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I don't think it is a big deal: spitting is way worse as is smoking and drug use in public.

My boys have weed on trees, in bushes and in drains if need be - when they were little. Now at 14 and 10 they can hang on until we find a toilet and they don't consider using a tree or bush.

I EC our littlest outdoors sometimes if we need to, and my 4yo dd has very rarely needed to wee when we are out and about bur she did when she was smaller. I don't think it is the worst thing that could ever happen but maybe I've had more years of toddlerdom and bladder distraction in my family than some people

This is one of those things where if you are totally against it you won't let your child do it and you will accept the consequences of that, or maybe keep them in nappies for longer.
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#65 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 03:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by pixiepunk View Post
it's not about whether or not parenthood is easy or hard … get over it. pee is sterile, and it's a natural bodily function.
Thank you!
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#66 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 03:18 PM
 
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I got a bit : reading all the posts. So I had to go back and reread the OPs original post.

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Originally Posted by bettysmom View Post
There is no restroom actually at the playground, but there are local businesses right across the street with clean restrooms and nice staff.
Assuming that these businesses don't mind, if at all possible I'd opt for these restrooms. But this might not always be the case. I would feel compelled to patronize the business since we made use of their restroom, and as someone else said, I might not be able to do this each time.

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Originally Posted by bettysmom View Post
What do you think of this? Should boys just fire away in public outdoor places, or should parents try to teach them to announce their need soon enough that they can get to an actual toilet? And am I just a prude?
I don't the it's the end of the world to pee on a bush or tree, but I would look for a secluded spot where privacy could be maintained. If there are no restrooms at the public park, that's not going to stop my child from peeing.

Although, I have a diva and I know she'd hold it rather than pee in public...My ds, though, I can see peeing in public.
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#67 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 03:22 PM
 
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It's completely inappropriate unless it's an emergency. We've had to let DS go a few times in that case...once when he was just training and we were twenty miles from the nearest building, and he needed to go. We pulled over, hid behind some bushes and watered a tree.

Parents should absolutely not be encouraging their children to whip it out at a playground for no good reason. And if an emergency situation exists, a courteous parent will make some effort to shield the child from view.
Yep, the handful of times, my son did this kind of thing, was only because he couldn't wait. And we always went out of range a little. I don't want anyone stepping in pee.
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#68 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 03:52 PM
 
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I don't have a problem with a parent finding a somewhat secluded spot in an emergency, but I don't like the idea of little kids peeing in the middle of the park. I do remember as a child my mom had an emergency potty in the back of our station wagon (think potty chair). That worked well for us, of course we were all girls. I do think it is important for parents to try and impart this behavior is for emergencies only. I only have girls and we have never had them go out in public, but we have public restrooms pretty much everywhere and they are generally pretty clean. I might change my mind if that weren't the case.
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#69 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 04:50 PM
 
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My DD is 8 years old and loves to pee outside (just like his father does) Now before you go jumping to conclusions...My DH only does this at night in our backyard which faces a farm. I am not in agreement with this behavior but it is baffling to me what is so fun about peeing outside when bathrooms are readily available. Maybe it has something to do with getting back to nature and feeling the wind in your....or more likely it's pure laziness. At any rate, what is borderline appropriate for a toddler, becomes less so as kids get older. While I sometimes catch and reprimand my son for peeing in the backyard, it would be totally inappropriate for an 8 year old to do so at a park or any other public place. In emergency situations, we've all done what we have to do but FYI, my 20 year old niece recently got arrested and spent the night in jail for an emergency pee in a parking lot at night at her college campus. So, for all those in agreement with public peeing toddlers, at what point is it not ok? I, for one, still keep a diaper in the car for emergency situations for my 3 year old DD.

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#70 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 04:51 PM
 
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I wouldn't want a kid (mine or anyone else's) to pee anywhere I wouldn't want a dog to pee. Way off in the bushes where nobody plays? Fine. Up against a tree in the middle of the play area? No way. Urine may be sterile when it comes out, but it doesn't stay that way for long.
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#71 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 05:08 PM
 
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I absolutely hate the smell of urine in public places. I usually assume it is an adult who has done the act, but I am sure it is smelly when it comes from kids too. I think it is best to not go in public areas unless it is an absolute emergency.
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#72 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 05:22 PM
 
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In an emergency, I don't think there's anything wrong with peeing away from everyone (like off in the trees, out of sight...I do this myself often when we're hiking through the woods)...but...just at the edge of the park? And, what, only the boys? OP - I would be using the facilities across the street before going in to the park and upon leaving in order to avoid such an emergency.

What I'm not getting are all these comparisons of toddlers to dogs. Huh? Of course dogs pee outside. If you know of a dog who uses the toilet I'd love to see a picture...
Apples to oranges, ladies.

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#73 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 05:34 PM
 
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In an emergency, there may be an appropriate area of a park for children to pee in, but I really find it inappropriate for adults or kids of either gender to pee IN the playground.

My daughter looooooves to collect leaves and acorns and such from trees around the playground, and it's disgusting to know that some parents think those are appropriate pee spots. The only playground where I've seen children peeing (and that was a girl, for the record), we don't go to anymore.

As for dog pee, at least here, dogs aren't allowed on the playground, and I don't let my daughter collect leaves and sticks--or run and play--in dog/pee appropriate areas. Playground trees are not for peeing on.

We have a portable folding potty for playground use, or we go to shops which don't mind (I've asked) because while we may not buy something that exact time, we shop there regularly regardless. I also once let my dd pee in the drain for the water sprinkler that kids splash in. I know that the water there is not recycled, so in an emergency, I knew it would go directly into the sewer, and would be fully washed away.

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#74 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 05:39 PM
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#75 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 06:01 PM
 
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I think Americans have a very distorted and unhealthy view of the human body. It saddens me that the nudity of children is so reprehensible to so many.

I really wish I lived in Europe!

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#76 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 06:32 PM
 
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I think this whole conversation should be about how freaked out we are in general by biological behavior. The misdemeanor indecency exposure is used all the time in situations where someone is really just trying to find a place to pee. It's sad. Of course I don't want exhibitionists around any children anywhere, but is that what this is about? Is peeing behind a tree really that disgusting?!
I think that learning discrection and respect for others would allow little boys the skill to quickly and quietly pee in an emergency w/o showing off thier privates. Same goes for girls.
My little boy lives in the country and pees outside a lot of the time, granted this is at home. Well when we recently went on vacation and stayed at a hotel he tried to pee outside in a very busy area. So I tell him you cannot pee outside unless we are at home. Now when we're out doing chores or working on Daddy's farm he is freaked out to pee outside!! I'm sure he'll get over it.
My uncle had his grandson stay with him at his country home for the summer, he was about 7. Uncle taught little boy to pee behind a tree when they were out doing chores.
When the little guy went back to Los Angeles his mom took him to the mall where he promptly climbed into a indoor plant area and dropped his pants.
I thought it was funny!! But thank goodness he wasn't hauled away in handcuffs.!
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#77 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 06:46 PM
 
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I think it's cute for little boys, kinda gross for adults. If I were male, I would definitely take advantage of the pee anywhere benefit in emergenices, though! However, I do think it should be limited to places where the urine can be absorbed into the ground rather than on pavement or somewhere that is likely to be walked on.

I can't imagine having a problem with anyone, male or female of any age, peeing outside where no one can see them, as long as it's in the woods or somewhere remote. Urine really isn't some huge health hazard.

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#78 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 07:06 PM
 
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I think Americans have a very distorted and unhealthy view of the human body. It saddens me that the nudity of children is so reprehensible to so many.
Seriously! This thread is truly bizarre : I really do not understand the freaking out about toddlers peeing on a tree, regardless of the presence of bathrooms. And what is the deal with comparing toddlers to adults and older children, forget dogs? Talk about apples to oranges! I hope by the time my son is grown he will be doing lot's of things differently, like not farting in public and announcing it proudly! Or maybe speaking in fully understandable sentences!

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#79 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 07:50 PM
 
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[QUOTE And what is the deal with comparing toddlers to adults and older children, forget dogs? Talk about apples to oranges! QUOTE]

Thats exactly what i was thinking...really dont get that at all!
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#80 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 08:02 PM
 
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I actually have no problem with nude toddlers running around at the playground. In the summer when the sprinklers are on, there are always a few both boys and girls shirtless, or in just panties, or in nothing. That doesn't bother me at all.

But peeing on trees IN the playground when other children will then be picking up leaves, sticks, other natural treasures soaked in someone's urine? Go outside the playground gate at least, where I know that there might be urine, human or dog, instead. You don't even have to take your other child(ren) with you to do that here, depending on their age. You can still see the whole playground.

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#81 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 08:38 PM
 
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my little one just came inside and said mama i peed out side come look...it has not rained here in months so the ground is dry...except where he peed!!!!i love it..right in the middle of the back yard..and yes where we all walk and sit and even have a picnic sometimes..it's urine...it's sterile and it's ok..at least i'm not using up the rainforest having a diaper on his bum..right? just my 2 cent...pee where ever your little heart desire's my boy....

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#82 of 153 Old 10-09-2007, 10:54 PM
 
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I have, in an emergency only, stopped my car on a secluded road to let my son's go pee pee--again, in an emergency and only if I'm nowhere near a restroom. I'd do the same if they were throwing up. However, I think it's disgusting for a child to pee, to be encouraged to pee on a playground. Firstly, it's just rude, and secondly, there may be children coming along behind who are playing under that same tree. I just don't see why a mom or dad can't drag her(him)self away to get the child to a proper bathroom. It's inappropriate behavior to urinate in public and, in fact, against the law in most places. Imagine my surprise and disgust when I got off the Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger Spin at Disney World last week to see a father lift his son up onto a planter, pull his pants down and let him pee all over the Disney landscaping. The bathrooms were literally two hundred feet away. It's just foul and disgusting.
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#83 of 153 Old 10-10-2007, 12:24 AM
 
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my little one just came inside and said mama i peed out side come look...it has not rained here in months so the ground is dry...except where he peed!!!!i love it..right in the middle of the back yard..and yes where we all walk and sit and even have a picnic sometimes..it's urine...it's sterile and it's ok..at least i'm not using up the rainforest having a diaper on his bum..right? just my 2 cent...pee where ever your little heart desire's my boy....
Err... that's in your own backyard, so the only one who might end up eating off that pee or picking up stuff drenched in it is your family. And you know it's there, so you won't do that before it's soaked in/rinsed away/gone. In a public playground, it is not your private space. Apparently there are many many parents who do this with their kids. Just be aware that there are also many parents who may complain and find it putrid. As for the rainforest saving, there are cloth diapers and EC techniques... we're mostly talking about potty trained children in PUBLIC spaces to my understanding. I don't care in the least what you do in your backyard.

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#84 of 153 Old 10-10-2007, 12:28 AM
 
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Imagine my surprise and disgust when I got off the Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger Spin at Disney World last week to see a father lift his son up onto a planter, pull his pants down and let him pee all over the Disney landscaping.
So tempting...must bite my tongue...

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#85 of 153 Old 10-10-2007, 12:52 AM
 
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Read the thread, and I have a question for folks:
How do you feel about little ones peeing on little potty in public? Basically I am trying to separate the modesty issue from the the ick factor of urine in public places.

Ever since my oldest expressed an interest in potty training we have just kept a potty with us - baby bjorn little potty in jog stroller, another in the back of the car etc. so that if the mood struck him he could potty wherever, whenever. Sometimes this happens in a playground, but I usually sop it up with a cloth diaper and bag it just like I would a diaper that got wet while being worn.

Your thoughts?

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#86 of 153 Old 10-10-2007, 12:59 AM
 
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Originally Posted by rjrmommy View Post
Imagine my surprise and disgust when I got off the Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger Spin at Disney World last week to see a father lift his son up onto a planter, pull his pants down and let him pee all over the Disney landscaping. The bathrooms were literally two hundred feet away. It's just foul and disgusting.
I've heard that Disney uses edible plants in the landscaping, in case children might eat it.
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#87 of 153 Old 10-10-2007, 01:09 AM
 
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Thanks, everyone! I gather from the responses that I'm in the minority but not alone. And that my perspective might change once DD is potty learning. And that I might be in for a real shock if I ever have a boy!
I think it's gross and inappropriate. It's fine to find some privacy and have your kid pee outside when there isn't another choice....but to pee in full view of a group of people, near where children are playing? YUCK! It's inconsiderate of the people around you.

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#88 of 153 Old 10-10-2007, 01:20 AM
 
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Read the thread, and I have a question for folks:
How do you feel about little ones peeing on little potty in public? Basically I am trying to separate the modesty issue from the the ick factor of urine in public places.
My only issue is the urine in public places. Urine can really reek, and I know I get icked out when I'm in a place where it is clear people are using it as a toilet, like in some parking garages or whatever. So the thought that children using the trees as the rule rather than the exception could bug me depending on the park. There is a park near my house, and there is a grassy area under some trees that provides a nice shady place to sit, but it isn't large. If I knew that a significant number of children were using it as a public toilet, I would not want to use the park. Plus I know how dog and rabbit urine can just kill grass, so if numerous children were peeing outside, I think it could be problematic.

In general though, I don't have an issue with peeing outside. It's just that I now have a 4 year old who pees outside, poops outside, pees inside on the carpet, the furniture. Sigh. She can shoot a stream of urine at least 2 feet. So when talking to her about the whole concept, I have started thinking about public sanitation and how and why we separate it and I know there is value to it. So I'm working with her on the right places to go, meaning encouraging her to use the toilet, but also if going outside picking one area over another. When we go swimming in the summer, a few times she peed on the brick of the patio. I told her to either pee in the pool or out on the dirt beds (so it would soak in) and not on the patio and preferably not on the grass, although she does pee in the grass sometimes.

It would bother me to see a father encouraging his son to pee on landscaping in a theme park when there were restrooms nearby. I also dislike the double standard with it being fine for boys and not for girls. I'd be better disposed towards a parent helping their son pee against a tree if s/he helped her daughter do the same.
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#89 of 153 Old 10-10-2007, 11:39 AM
 
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First, I don't think anyone is advocating urinating on a playground. The issue is peeing on a tree or in the grass. I have never heard of anyone directing their child to pee on a playground. Even the Disney example had the child peeing in the foliage.

As for the public nudity....yeah...I think this is waaaay overblown. These are little kids. There's nothing sexual or lewd about a naked child. And it is completely natural. Just like when I BF my child in public. You might see a little boob when I do but it's not sexual or lewd either.

As for the "ick" factor. I just don't buy this. The trees around the parks here are peed on quite a bit (our Mama's group sees to that) and it doesn't smell one bit...not even a smidgen (trust me....if it did, one of our pg Mamas would have noticed). However, the bathrooms reek. It's really quite logical. Someone must manually clean a bathroom....trees and grass; however, have a natural, built in cleaning system (rain etc.).

As a side note, I find it troublesome that some seem to think it is better and more appropriate that a child pees on him/herself rather than peeing on a tree. Sometimes, a bathroom just isn't an option (referring back to pixipunk's post).

Further, you just never know the full story. For example, DS1 was pretty much fully potty trained....'till he had an automatic toilet flush while he was sitting on it thus making him completely terrified of toilets. He simply will not use one. However, he will use a tree/grass. So, that is what we do....even if it's right next to a bathroom. I don't think we should be so quick to judge (ie the Disney example).

I really am very surprised that so many people on this particular board have such a problem w/ something so natural.

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#90 of 153 Old 10-10-2007, 11:43 AM
 
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This drives me nuts!!!! I have had people do this in our front yard when we aren't even in the yard (viewed through the window, and this was our next door neighbor!!! not an emergency). Yuck. At least ask first. Sorry, it's natural, but it's still in poor taste to do that in other people's yards without asking first, so I could offer the child the toilet, or say, no, go walk next door and let him pee on your tree.

And I have seen someone let their son urinate at the base of the slide, when they could step just a few yards away to a tree. (or how about the nice public restroom facilities just a hundred yards away that all the other kids use?)
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