Thanks for these replies.
He can communicate clearly, and honestly, the only thing I want to stop is the screeching! He can continue to yell (oh, and we had to put the kibosh on hitting, as well, for obvious reasons). He is more than welcome to stomp about, to shout (for now...as he gets older we'll channel that into more appropriate vents), to tell me he doesn't like it or doesn't like me or whatever. Just not that screeching because 1) it's insanely loud, and 2) when I hear kids I do that, I always think it's an emergency but since most kids use that screeching pretty often it's almost like crying wolf, if that makes sense. If I can get him to knock off the screeching then if he is in REAL trouble I will know to come charging to him.
Also, I think part of it is that he is frustrated that I am able to physically move him. As a toddler, he wants to be autonomous, but obviously isn't quite ready to be a fully independent little person. I try really hard to respect that by getting him to come with me on his terms, but if we have to leave somewhere, I've let him know we are leaving and he is still buckling in his seat, I'm forced to physically get him in his seat or else wait till he is ready. I know some parents would say to take the second option, but I'll be honest and say that I don't see myself patiently waiting until my toddler is ready to leave, nor do I believe that he is in a position to make the decisions about when and where to go. So, to sum
I do TRY to respect his physical boundaries and such and I think that sometimes these tantrums are set off when I am not able to respect those boundaries he wishes to have. In that respect, I suppose I'll just have to get through that, since we will always have places we need to be and things we need to do. FTR, I always give him notice before we leave someplace (I will say 5 minutes till we leave, 3...., 2...., 1.... and this doesn't correspond to 5 minutes, but more like fifteen) and I do my best to structure things so that if we are leaving somewhere fun we are going someplace else that is fun (i.e. we will go to the library first and then to the grocery store...he likes both places). However, when we go home I hit a wall. I try to appeal to his love of our animals, but can the kitties compare to the park? No.
I don't know if it's something physical. Lately, he has taken to telling us when his tummy hurts (which usually means he's about to run to the potty to poop) or when it's grumbly (how cute is THAT??) which means he's hungry (he'll say tummy grumbly grumbly grumbly....I just want to eat him up when he does that....and give him ANYTHING in the world to eat....I don't let HIM know that, though!
). I think he would be able to tell us if something hurt. He also tells us if he has a bug bite or gets hurt, so he understands the concept.
Let's see, what else...maybe there's a growth spurt about to happen? It seems to me that whenever I perceive things as difficult, something suddenly happens, like he gets bigger or all of a sudden has a bunch of new words. So maybe he's about to have a big milestone. In which case I suppose I'll just have to be patient (I don't WANNA!
Thanks again, mamas!
Any experiences, tips, insights you can share would be helpful.
And I oughta break out the rescue remedy! He likes taking medicine (we do mostly homeopathics, and sugar is yummy, right?)...