I'm still nursing my almost-22 month old. I can't say I planned to nurse this long. I wanted to go to a year and then gradually wean and be completely done by 2 years..as in, by now I would be nursing to put him to sleep and maaaybe one other time and that's it. Well, my son tends to be a picky eater, he stops eating solids completely when he teeths or gets sick. He's extremely intense as well and throws fits that I swear, the only way I can get him to calm down is by nursing him. So instead of nursing maybe 3 times a day, we're nursing about 10. He is nightweaned, we usually go from bedtime (8-8:30) to 3am, though recently he has started sleeping through til 5:30
so I do feel we're advancing sloooowly. He does on occasion try new foods as well, so I feel on the whole, we're progressing with the weaning thing.
However, this isn't fast enough for my husband. First off, we want to have another kid soon and getting pregnant while nursing does not seem to work out for me so there's a lot of pressure for me to wean so I can get knocked up. Additionally, his mother puts a lot of pressure on him to wean Haakon and has told him in the past that the fact we're still nursing him is like we're not respecting his humanity (??) and we've failed to get him to eat and that sort of thing. She thinks that what we should do is have me go away for a few days and DH can watch DS and I can have a break and ta da! We'll wean him. She did it with second daughter who at 17 months was showing no inclination to stop nursing whereas her other two children weaned right around a year)
Adding to the weaning pressure is the fact that we're going to visit his family this summer for a few weeks and he really, really wants our son weaned by then.
However, I am really against this idea. I very firmly feel that it will destroy my son. I just got back from a two week trip visiting my family and before I went, if DS woke up in the night before he was allowed to nurse I would just tell him boobies were still sleeping, he couldn't nurse yet and he could go lay down next to daddy. That stopped working while we were away and now if I dothat, he just sits there and cries. The cries quickly escalate into screams and then I have to get up with him, watch music videos on youtube until he calms down and it's time to nurse and then he usually goes back to sleep.
Last night, of course, he didn't and DH and I both got very little sleep, which hit DH hardest because he is basically working all the time right now trying to finish a projects from his several jobs (he's a workaholic) and has only been sleeping 5-6 hours a night lately.
So now he's really pushing the two day weaning system. I could go to a Day Spa, he'd have DS, blah blah blah...what he leaves out is the fact that right now, he is completely unable to put DS to sleep. It just doesn't work. Not only that, but he has no time to do this right now! He has too much work! There is no way he could take our son for 48 hours without me there especially with all the screaming my continued absence would bring about. Since our son was born, I have been away from him maybe 4 or 5 hours, max. Never overnight.
I have suggested to him that we extend the nightly no nurse period, especially since DS is starting to sleep longer all on his own. The problem is that the nights that DS does wake up early, I need a well rested DH who will be able to do the nighttime parenting because if I'm in the room, DS will want to nurse and won't be comforted by DH. We learned that during nightweaning and i started sleeping on the couch. Obviously we have to wait til DS gets used to being comforted by DH at night, period.
Hm, this is getting long. I should stop here. At any rate, any idea on how I can convince my DH that what we are doing is called WEANING and that the 48 hour breastmilk detox is a very bad idea?