Help!! DD wakes too early because she wants to bf - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 03-05-2012, 10:37 AM - Thread Starter
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DD is 3 and I have a one month old ds. My milk dried up during pg but DD kept nursing anyway and was so excited when my milk came in.  Reading books used to be part of her bedtime routine but lately she doesnt even want books, just wants to lay down and bf.  I had nightweaned her early in my pg and I definitely do NOT want to go back to nursing her in the middle of the night.


Lately she's been waking between 530 and 6 to nurse - I will bf around 7 when it's light outside.  When I tell her it's too early, she cries and kicks and tries to pull on my shirt.  She's only gotten around 10 hours of sleep for the past 7 nights, and she doesn't nap anymore.  That doesn't seem like enough but she's so excited to bf that I think she's waking up early.  I let her bf 3 times a day (night, morning, and once in the afternoon) and she usually doesn't ask for any more than that. 


DS usually wakes up when she does and then I have two screaming kids to deal with and DH works night shifts so I'm on my own.  Any suggestions on how to deal with this?  I don't want to give in to her screaming and have her start bfing at night again....this morning all three of us were awake and crying at 530am.  Help please!!!

Loving wife to DH and buddamomimg1.pngmama to DD (11/08) and DS (2/12)

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#2 of 6 Old 03-07-2012, 06:11 AM
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Oh Bluedaisy!  I can so relate. 


We've had a lot of moments just like that.  And, I don't have any advice really... I totally just give in to DD1 and let her nurse.  I decided a week ago or so to stop trying to limit her nursing.  We've had a lot of power struggles recently and I decided that I couldn't stand fighting about bf... so I stopped.  And, she seems to be demanding less frequently and for shorter periods.  Only once in the middle of the night last night instead of the four times 1-2 weeks ago.  I never night-weaned though so I was dealing with that...


The other thing is that one time after a screaming fit on her part I started sobbing and told her she's treating me like a cow and she's a greedy farmer.  I want to make milk for my baby cows and the greedy farmer keeps trying to steal it.   It really hit home for her (that and my sobbing!) and now a few times when things have gotten bad she's asked if I feel like she's treating me like a cow and she's the farmer... we can easily see our way out of the fight from there.  Can you talk with your DD about your feelings?


But oh my gosh... I can't believe you're dealing with this and your DH is working night shift.  You must be exhausted!





Partner to DH and mom to DD1 (3/2008) and DD2 (born 1/2012).
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#3 of 6 Old 03-07-2012, 11:50 AM - Thread Starter
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Thanks parsley, it helps to know I'm not the only one!!  I've thought about just giving in to her but I'm concerned it will get earlier and earlier until she's waking in the middle of the night again - I tried showing her the clock and telling her she can have bm when the first number is "7" - the other morning she woke up at 530 and layed right in front of the clock to wait for it to turn to 7 - lol, I told her she would be waiting for a long time.  The next morning she just changed the clock herself until she found 7!  I've tried telling her mommy is tired and needs to go back to sleep but she screams - it makes me upset too when she kicks me and grabs at my shirt and I don't want to reward that behavior.  But maybe if I let her bf before she starts the screaming it would help her not feel so anxious and start sleeping a little later. 

Loving wife to DH and buddamomimg1.pngmama to DD (11/08) and DS (2/12)

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#4 of 6 Old 03-07-2012, 08:08 PM
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My dd is 2 and I have no other children yet. But my key for needing a longer stretch of sleep is that I am charting and need the solid sleep to get a reliable temp. 
The last few days I've told my dd that she can't have milk until my alarm goes off (and demostrating it a few times), and if she is sleeping I'll wake her to have milk, so when she wakes up I just tell her the alarm hasn't gone off yet,and she seems to be okay with it so far. 

Mama to  Hadley (2/10) energy.gif& Sawyer (1/13) babyboy.gif familybed1.gif


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#5 of 6 Old 03-23-2012, 09:18 AM
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I'm going through the same thing and am desperate.  My dd is just over 2.  At 18 months I had to put her in the drib because I was an all night diner to her.  She'd lay on me and nurse all night long.  My husband now works away from home so I'm on my own 5 nights a week.  Anyway, i'll make her wait as you said "until the sun comes up".  But she still wakes up 4-5 times a night screaming "BOOBIE!!!"  And because she gets herself so worked up she can't fall back to sleep.  She is so overtired that she is a pain to deal with during the day.  She also wants to nurse until she is asleep and then be laid down.  I'm at the end of my rope and am about to quit completely.


And I want to add here that I nursed my son until he was 4.5 and my 1st until 16 months, so this is nothing new, but my youngest dd is so demanding and not sleeping that I feel like the only way to get her from continually asking for it and keeping herself up at night is to wean her.


So, anyway, you are not alone and it seems you have it good with 6am.  My dd does what youa re worried about.  If I give in at 6, then the next day is 5:30, then the next is 4:30, until she is wakinge very hour again.  I have no one else to go in at night to comfort her so when she sees me she wants boobie.


I'd like some advice too, but i'm afraid that there aren't any easy answers to this.



Paula, mom of Leora 4/03, Oliver 1/05, and Baby 2/10. Owner to 3 crazy cats and one 100 lb dog.
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#6 of 6 Old 03-25-2012, 06:25 AM
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I also just posted on this! We are in the same boat of my son waking up waaaay to early for milk. 4am, sometimes 3:30. I refuse if its before 4. When I refuse he acts like a freaking animal who is being tortured! Screaming on the top of his lungs, kicking and screaming. My husband desperately wants me to wean...

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