BF while pregnant - how to deal with the heebie jeebies? - Mothering Forums

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Old 07-09-2012, 10:50 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm 21 weeks pregnant, and I have a very mama-centric 3 yo DD. Nursing has become really uncomfortable for me - painful and sometimes it just gives me the all-overs. I've been limiting her to a 5-second nurse, which has been OK because we'll count on our fingers and she loves that smile.gif Other times the 5 seconds isn't enough, and I'm literally gritting my teeth waiting for it to be done. She does seem to be needing it less - maybe once or twice a day now (morning and night, and occasional upsets).

 

I'm just wondering how to talk to her/help her process this new reality. I don't want her to associate any bad nursing feelings with mama pregnant/new baby, and it must be confusing for her? Snuggling helps, but if this is the beginning of winding down her nursing, I would really like it to be a loving, supportive process for her...

 

Any suggestions? Thank you!


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Old 07-10-2012, 04:33 PM
 
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oh goodness, i sure remember that feeling when i was pregnant. and i always felt so sad for my little nursling greensad.gif it sounds like you are doing a great job supporting your little one through the change, i can't think of any suggestions. good luck!


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Old 07-10-2012, 11:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you for your support! I had all these ideas about how to lovingly guide her through weaning, and then of course I get pregnant! Oh well... best laid plans I guess. ;)
 


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Old 07-11-2012, 09:14 AM
 
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With my 2.5 year old daughter, when I am having difficult times, I find distracting myself by reading helps A LOT! I didn't realize how much until my tablet charger broke and I have been without it for a week. It's been so much harder! So try distraction of yourself as an option!

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Old 07-12-2012, 11:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That is a great idea -  I used to read, back when nursing sessions were so long ;) but it worth revisiting for the distraction factor.

 

Thank you!


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Old 07-13-2012, 12:14 AM
 
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Distractions worked for us too.  Reading was great for me most of the time.  Sometimes though... enough was enough!  I would talk to my DS 2.5yo at the time, and ask him questions, or sing a song I knew he would want to join with the hope that he would pop off and talk or sing with me.  And then when it was at its worst (around 20 weeks preggo) Before we would nurse I would remind him that my body was changing and growing, just like his, and that growing takes a lot of work and my boobs needed frequent breaks and rest just like the rest of our bodies when they are working and growing.  It helped, didn't solve the "all-overs" (I like the term), but helped us get through it!

 

Good luck!

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Old 07-13-2012, 03:31 AM
 
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I had to limit my LO to once a day (bedtime).  Before i did this i was so sore (in the nipples), and had waves of extreme nausea while i was nursing.  I tried the shortened nursing but for me latch-on was the worst bit, so latching on repeatedly for 10 seconds of nursing had me wanting to rip my skin off.

 

Since dropping her down from 4-5x day and 1-2x night (which was painful for us both for the first 2-3 days, but we did lots of books, cuddles and sippy's of warm drinks) to one a day i feel much better, ok enough that i'm now planning on letting her choose when to drop this last feed, even though it may mean me tandem nursing (before this the idea made me want to formula feed EVERYONE because nursing had gotten so horrible).  Your LO is bigger and you can talk - does she know you're pregnant?  I explained a few times that the baby in my tummy made it hard for the boobies to work properly and eventually DD seemed to get it, but she's only 25months, i'm sure you'll have better luck.

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Old 07-15-2012, 11:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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She does know I'm pregnant, and I was worried that talking to her about how my boobs were changing might make her associate the baby with interfering with her nursing (baby=bad!). But maybe I'm giving her too little credit...? Obviously she can see my body is changing - and maybe talking about it in a general way will help her understand. It seems like it's definitely better to talk about it, since she is older and can understand much more than she would have a year ago.

 

Thank you!


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Old 07-16-2012, 05:29 AM
 
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Well here i try to phrase around how looking after the boobies is looking after the baby, and we ALL want to look after the baby.  I refer to it as "your baby" and she frequently pulls the duvet down in the mornings to kiss my little bulge and say "awww a baby"! to it, so just now i think the feelings are good.  I get what you mean (about baby=bad association) but my nursling already has an older sibling, so she's used to the concept that we all share some things, so maybe that helps?  Also i try to focus on how the boobies have become sore because mama's BODY is working hard to grow her a new little baby to play with - she's keen to help ME, even if the baby was something she wasn't feeling so excited/generous about!  We've also begun discussing gently how the baby will need to nurse the boobies when it comes out.  At first she was very "no!" about it, but gradually now she's beginning to mention it herself with more openness towards the idea.  I honestly don't mind if she's still nursing then too, in fact as long as i can keep her to one feed a day i'm thinking it'll be fairly sweet if she can share nursing with her new sibling for a few weeks or months.

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