What Does a Day of Breastfeeding Your 2-Year Old Look Like? - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 37 Old 01-24-2013, 02:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
pickle18's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 689
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I'm curious smile.gif  DS is 21 months, coming up on his 2nd birthday fast, and we nurse (what feels like) almost constantly, day and night.  

 

He can only get to sleep at night by nursing, intermittently for 10-15 min. sessions as he winds down, and a solid 30 minutes to an hour to finally nod off.  He is on the boob most of the night (latching on roughly hourly), at least one or two of those are real 30 min. feedings, the rest maybe 5-10 minutes (I'm guessing - I'm half conscious).  The last two hours before waking he is pretty much permanently attached to me, flopping like a fish. We get up, eat breakfast, aaannnnnddd...then more on-demand nursing!  For another half an hour, to an hour.  Maybe hour break for playtime, and repeat.  Afternoon is more sporadic (could be lots of little sessions, or he might be preoccupied, depending on what we're up to), but he is totally attached at the boob for his entire 3+ hour nap.  I can rarely detach long enough to pee, and he usually greets me with a sleepy wail and request to nurse as soon as I return. He simply cannot sleep without it.  We do lots more nursing in the evening in bits around dinner time, but by then I've lost track!

 

Absolutely 100% of this nursing is initiated by him (QUITE intently), so we are not remotely in the realm of "don't offer, don't refuse." orngtongue.gif Which is fine by me - I'm not looking to wean or complaining, just looking for a lil support and encouragement - and also honestly wondering how typical this is?  I hear alot of mothers mention their toddlers occasionally STTN, or one or two nightfeeds, or feeding a handful of times a day - and I start to wonder if we are loopy outliers. wild.gif

 

Am I on the right track for continuing to let him nurse on demand?  He is an intense, spirited lil guy, and a toddler to boot, so I figure he must be needing this...

 

eta: he does drink water, diluted juice, or coconut/almond milk and eats a TON (big kid, big appetite) - wide variety of foods, including odd/spicy/strong flavors, tons of veggies, etc.


~ Lucky wife of DH blowkiss.gifand loving mama to DS biggrinbounce.gif (04/11) ~

 

treehugger.gif * femalesling.GIF * ecbaby2.gif *cd.gif * familybed1.gif * bf.gif * namaste.gif *

pickle18 is offline  
#2 of 37 Old 01-24-2013, 08:57 PM
 
flyrabbitfly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Seoul, Korea
Posts: 152
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Not like I thought it would!

Like you, I hear from others that nursing their toddler looks nothing like nursing a newborn, i.e.: they nurse down to sleep for nap and bedtime, plus a wakeup nurse and once or twice during the day. NOT! I will say that there have been a few short interludes when we only nurse a few times during the day and upon waking and have only woken up once or twice at night to nurse, and each time I think this is the new normal, and then teeth happen, or a move happens, or travel happens, or a scary dog happens, or sickness happens, and we are back to nursing many times at night and throughout the day. Sometimes I don't have any idea what the issue is: the fairy farted on the moon or something, but it is pretty much always something! Twice he's had stomach bugs that put us literally back to newborn nursing, i.e. every 30 min to 1 hr all day, all night.

These days the only sleep advantage I have on you is that I started to pop him off when he really fell asleep around 19 or 20 mo (DS is 32 mo now), so I can get up at nap time, and at night I sleep better when he isn't tickling me every 20 seconds with sleepy suckling.

Another thing that maybe helps at night these days is we've started waking him up by a certain time in the morning and at naptime. This way he seems more tired at night and sleeps through a little more. Like 4 hour stretches. Occasionally even 6, and then I wake up hearing angels sing from above and all. Or maybe we are just in between farting fairies and teeth (we still have those two-year molars hanging over us).

But also, like you, though it is sometimes hard and exhausting, it is doable and I feel like if he didn't need it he wouldn't ask. And I wonder if a lot of the families who have few nursing demands put some kind of limit on it. A friend of mine night-weaned and then found daytime nursing go down to just once or twice a day. On the one hand, that sounds great, but on the other I would hate to take the trust he has in this form of food and comfort away from him. And then there is just that kids are different. Some kids will wean themselves around this age, and others will wean themselves WAY down the road  (sometime before college- just kidding). Some days (mostly nights) it is kind of crappy, but I'm not working, I don't have somewhere else to be. This is my work. So it's what we do.

jessiraffa likes this.

"That's the way it is, if that's the way it seems to you."

"Cosi e se vi pare."

Luigi Pirandello

flyrabbitfly is offline  
#3 of 37 Old 01-25-2013, 07:11 AM
 
luckiest's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: TX
Posts: 703
Mentioned: 9 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 25 Post(s)

I'm right there with you!!  DS is 26 months and nurses...a lot.  I look at other, younger breastfed babies and it seems like sometime in the second year they taper down on their own to nursing just when going to sleep or waking up.  Not mine, but he has always been high needs, so I assume this is just part of that.

 

He nurses 2-3 times at night, a prolonged session upon waking, maybe 2-3 times before napping (not including nursing to sleep, another prolonged session), at least once DURING nap, waking up from nap, and untold number of times between nap and bed time.  When he's winding down in the evenings he seriously cluster feeds like an infant...it's really just "false starts" to bed time.  He's super high energy and needs the help winding down and being still.  

 

One bright spot now is that he almost never asks to nurse if we're in public (unless he's really tired) and if we're busy out of the house, he will go ages without nursing.




Living and loving in ATX with DH (of 7 years) and DS (3.5)
luckiest is online now  
#4 of 37 Old 01-25-2013, 08:45 AM
 
Lazurii's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Near Portland, Oregon
Posts: 810
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Both my kiddos, when two, nursed intensely.  Every session was initiated by them (with screaming and clothes ripping if asked to wait a bit), so, like you, there was no "don't offer, don't refuse."

 

I had a hard time nursing my toddlers, but I chalk that up to tandem nursing.  If I had been nursing only one I think it would have been a lot smoother for everyone involved.

 

I do want to add that when I nightweaned my kids (my son at 20 months, my daughter just in the past few days) my quality of sleep went up dramatically.  It made it easier to deal with every day irritations.


SAHM to DS BuggaBoo blahblah.gif  12/07, and DD Doozer energy.gif03/10.  Sharing life with The Hubby since 01/05.

Lazurii is offline  
#5 of 37 Old 01-25-2013, 09:14 AM
 
McGucks's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: among the wildflowers
Posts: 1,245
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I was a SAHM for 2.5 years and am now at work full-time.  We co-sleep.  DS will be 3 years old in a couple months.  We nurse around dawn for probably 30 minutes, on and off (he is half-asleep and this usually gets him back to sleep).  Then again as soon as I get home from work...then pretty much any time I sit down (he has stopped trying during meals).  He nurses to sleep.  Sometimes if I need to make a phone call or help him get himself together after an upset (a hurt, a tantrum, etc.). 

 

He is a nursing machine.  I don't think I'd have kept my sanity the past year were it not for the nursing, though...it's a cure-all and helps us through the rough times.  It is also kind of maddening at times, for sure, because he wants to nurse sometimes when I would just like to SIT.

jessiraffa likes this.

 sleepytime.gif I got tired of my signature, but I still love my children and husband and miss my little brotherkid.gif

McGucks is offline  
#6 of 37 Old 01-26-2013, 03:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
pickle18's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 689
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by flyrabbitfly View Post

But also, like you, though it is sometimes hard and exhausting, it is doable and I feel like if he didn't need it he wouldn't ask. And I wonder if a lot of the families who have few nursing demands put some kind of limit on it. A friend of mine night-weaned and then found daytime nursing go down to just once or twice a day. On the one hand, that sounds great, but on the other I would hate to take the trust he has in this form of food and comfort away from him. And then there is just that kids are different. Some kids will wean themselves around this age, and others will wean themselves WAY down the road  (sometime before college- just kidding). Some days (mostly nights) it is kind of crappy, but I'm not working, I don't have somewhere else to be. This is my work. So it's what we do.

ROTFLMAO.gif  You had me cracking up with the farting fairies!  And yes, I completely agree with you - it's alot, but I'm here for him (thankfully) so it's how we roll.  It's my work, and I don't mind - and I know this phase will pass all too soon!  Hearing from you and others helps me feel more normal, and more supported as we go.  Thanks!

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by luckiest View Post

I'm right there with you!!  DS is 26 months and nurses...a lot.  I look at other, younger breastfed babies and it seems like sometime in the second year they taper down on their own to nursing just when going to sleep or waking up.  Not mine, but he has always been high needs, so I assume this is just part of that.

 

He nurses 2-3 times at night, a prolonged session upon waking, maybe 2-3 times before napping (not including nursing to sleep, another prolonged session), at least once DURING nap, waking up from nap, and untold number of times between nap and bed time.  When he's winding down in the evenings he seriously cluster feeds like an infant...it's really just "false starts" to bed time.  He's super high energy and needs the help winding down and being still.  

 

One bright spot now is that he almost never asks to nurse if we're in public (unless he's really tired) and if we're busy out of the house, he will go ages without nursing.

 

Oh, luckiest, our kids really are from the same planet. winky.gif  I'm not entirely surprised but greatly comforted by your appearance on this thread - thank you!  We have the same deal, and I do think it's a high needs thing.  I've heard that high needs kids are often slow to wean, and I suppose it's not shocking that their breastfeeding needs are...um...high. smile.gif  I do think it's very calming and centering for him, seeing as how his emotions are so extreme and stormy, and how sensitive he is and aware of everything around him.  So I'm glad it's a trick I still have up my sleeve!

 

As for outside of the house, I'm lucky that DS is a koala kid because he still loves his Ergo (and my back can still handle it - he's actually lighter than he was as a chunk a munk baby) so we nurse on the go that way - HUGE help when doing grocery shopping or looking for a library book, and the need strikes!


~ Lucky wife of DH blowkiss.gifand loving mama to DS biggrinbounce.gif (04/11) ~

 

treehugger.gif * femalesling.GIF * ecbaby2.gif *cd.gif * familybed1.gif * bf.gif * namaste.gif *

pickle18 is offline  
#7 of 37 Old 01-26-2013, 03:52 PM
 
EchoSoul's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Michigan
Posts: 404
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Mine's the very same. Although he takes 2-3 hour breaks at night, and doesn't nurse at all for his naps except to take a nap, or if he's stirring and wants to settle back down. But he nurses often during the day. As often as every hour, as infrequent as every 2 hours if he's REALLY preoccupied, and quite often especially if he's upset.

 

He drinks lots of water, diluted juice, and *sometimes* almond milk as well. So yeah, it seems to be just a pull of the cards whether they're winding down by this age, or staying just the same as always! lol

EchoSoul is offline  
#8 of 37 Old 01-27-2013, 06:12 AM
 
McGucks's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: among the wildflowers
Posts: 1,245
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I forgot to mention that my almost-three year old still wakes up several times a night, and nursing is the only way to get him back down without a major screaming party.  He has just recently been able to only nurse for a few minutes, then, miraculously, often follows my suggestion to turn over so I can pat his back.

 

I have not slept through the night since July of 2009, which is when I got pregnant.


 sleepytime.gif I got tired of my signature, but I still love my children and husband and miss my little brotherkid.gif

McGucks is offline  
#9 of 37 Old 01-27-2013, 01:13 PM
 
susanmary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 153
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Oh the reassurance of knowing you aren't alone! And a great thread too! Just a little unsettling that my 13 month old probably won't be passing through this phase any time this year!

Do you all have to go to bed at the same time as your little one like me? It's really embarrassing if someone wants to call over or phone "when the baby is asleep"! And I do feel sad knowing that I've let friends down by not being able to join them on their hen night or wedding reception. Do those situations happen for you all too?

:-)
susanmary is offline  
#10 of 37 Old 01-27-2013, 05:32 PM - Thread Starter
 
pickle18's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 689
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

susanmary - yup, that's the way we roll over here, too!  Sometimes friends (particularly childless) don't understand, but we just explain - lil dude is my top priority, and we try to fit in friends where we can (alot more email, for example), but it's cut waaaay back since DS arrived.  I hope they'll be understanding as I would be for them. One day things will be different. smile.gif

 

So, I just had to update you guys because the WEIRDEST thing happened last night - DS slept nearly 6 hours without nursing!!!!!!!  Granted, he has heard me mention that we nurse often (but no bad connotation to it) AND he dropped his nap this week, but STILL!  Woke up after about 4 hours to him tossing and turning a bit, and my eyelids shot open, wide awake, like something was wrong.  Then I realized he hadn't nursed yet!  I was fully prepared to nurse him, only he rolled over, snuggled with DH, and went right back to sleep!

 

Well, needless to say, that left me wide awake, in utter amazement, and feeling weird - so I didn't fall back asleep until an hour and a half later, when he finally needed me again.  love.gif  It made me realize how used to snuggling with him I am, and how deeply used to our groove I've become.  Going to work even harder on treasuring this special time!

 

And right now, we just got back an hour or so ago from playing at a friend's house (where he only nursed once) and he's passed out sleeping on the couch, without my nipple in his mouth - feels sooooo weird.  Will have to see if this is a new trend (skip nap, easier sleep).  Brave new world,  if it is!


~ Lucky wife of DH blowkiss.gifand loving mama to DS biggrinbounce.gif (04/11) ~

 

treehugger.gif * femalesling.GIF * ecbaby2.gif *cd.gif * familybed1.gif * bf.gif * namaste.gif *

pickle18 is offline  
#11 of 37 Old 01-28-2013, 05:14 AM
 
Asiago's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,756
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by susanmary View Post

Oh the reassurance of knowing you aren't alone! And a great thread too! Just a little unsettling that my 13 month old probably won't be passing through this phase any time this year!

Do you all have to go to bed at the same time as your little one like me? It's really embarrassing if someone wants to call over or phone "when the baby is asleep"! And I do feel sad knowing that I've let friends down by not being able to join them on their hen night or wedding reception. Do those situations happen for you all too?

:-)

My three year old goes to sleep when we do. Regarding weddings, I've missed several.

Nursing needs are intense the first three years. I have been reading a lot about traditional societies and hunter-gather tribes (studies in the 1990's), and these children have very natural unrestricted nursing patterns for 3-5 years, until mother becomes pregnant again. It is common for three year olds to nurse every hour and twenty minutes, on average, depending upon the tribe. Infants nurse 2-4 times per hour the first year or so.  These are people who are not influenced by the sleep experts, medical community, literature, demands and views of industrialized society. The children have, for the most part, very natural, unrestricted nursing patterns. It puts it all into perspective when we feel that children in industrialized and western society nurse a lot, when actually they are just doing what humans are hard wired to do in order to survive as long as our species has.

pickle18 likes this.
Asiago is online now  
#12 of 37 Old 01-28-2013, 08:58 AM
 
Lazurii's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Near Portland, Oregon
Posts: 810
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

But indigenous tribes have to work less in order to have a better quality of life than us, so there aren't as many demands on their time.  They also have an entire tribe looking after the well-being of the mother and child, including sharing food and cross-feeding.

 

Until Western society adopts a "small, intense community" paradigm I'm afraid that letting children nurse to biological norms will be exhausting for most women.


SAHM to DS BuggaBoo blahblah.gif  12/07, and DD Doozer energy.gif03/10.  Sharing life with The Hubby since 01/05.

Lazurii is offline  
#13 of 37 Old 01-28-2013, 01:08 PM
 
susanmary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 153
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Hi ladies,

Pickle18 oh my goodness ... What!!! My fingers are crossed for you that this trend continues. We all know how quick things can turn around when it comes to our kids sleep & nursing needs, please do keep us posted! :-) not only reassurance but also hope! This really is a great thread.

Regarding so many missed evening social occasions .... I do hope our friend's understand ... someday at least. I totally agree, friend's who don't have kids find it the most difficult. In Ireland, bottle feeding is the norm so my childless friends are used to seeing their other friends that have children out and about without a bother.

Aslago, thanks for sharing your reading. Wouldn't it be wonderful if that research was common knowledge. Instead we are bombarded by all these "sleep experts" (grrrrrrr) saying that our kids "SHOULD" be sleeping x many hours without feeding, etc.


By the way ladies, have we established .... Are we "loopy outliers" as Pickle18 proposed?? ;-D
susanmary is offline  
#14 of 37 Old 01-28-2013, 02:15 PM
 
Lazurii's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Near Portland, Oregon
Posts: 810
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:


By the way ladies, have we established .... Are we "loopy outliers" as Pickle18 proposed?? ;-D

 

Oh, I doubt we're outliers.

 

Loopy, on the other hand...   wild.gif         jumpers.gif         hammer.gif

 

 

 

YES.


SAHM to DS BuggaBoo blahblah.gif  12/07, and DD Doozer energy.gif03/10.  Sharing life with The Hubby since 01/05.

Lazurii is offline  
#15 of 37 Old 01-28-2013, 06:04 PM
 
Asiago's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 1,756
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lazurii View Post

But indigenous tribes have to work less in order to have a better quality of life than us, so there aren't as many demands on their time.  They also have an entire tribe looking after the well-being of the mother and child, including sharing food and cross-feeding.

 

Until Western society adopts a "small, intense community" paradigm I'm afraid that letting children nurse to biological norms will be exhausting for most women.

It's true, and baby's grandmother seems to play the biggest role in helping mother, MIL (none) and husband not so much (apart from the husband hunting, which is very important). The first few years, mother's main job is to nurse her infant, and respond quickly to cries and needs (especially the first 18 mos. or so), but depending upon the tribe and her family circumstances, she may also hunt (with baby on her back!), forage, collect wood, set up camp and so on. It's really fascinating, I have been reading upon this subject the past couple of years, since I noticed quite a disparity among what is instinctive regarding mothering and western child rearing practices. I just wanted to know why and what on earth makes us so different in addressing our children's needs. Industrialization, pushing children beyond their readiness to be independant mini adults, and the influence of child rearing 'experts', begun with weighing stations set up by formula companies to increase formula sales leading to the first well baby vists and 'peds', Luther Emmet Holt, gosh the list goes on. It's complex, I had no idea when I first embarked upon it. But it seems, we know more than we think we do about mothering, and it's engrained for survival of our species.

Asiago is online now  
#16 of 37 Old 01-28-2013, 06:21 PM
 
Lazurii's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Near Portland, Oregon
Posts: 810
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Asiago View Post

It's true, and baby's grandmother seems to play the biggest role in helping mother,

 

 

LOL!  My mother's response to my struggles with my kids and PPD was just CIO and weaning.

 

Something broke in our society, and it's going to take a radical shift in cultural thinking to fix it.  But, as I'm sure you know, those first few generations of change are going to get a lot of push-back.

 

I do think as a Western society we're making progress.

 

OP, I'm sorry to go so deep into this OT, but it's just fascinating to me.  And it resonates so deeply with me since I think a lot of my personal frustration in life comes from my mothering instincts being thwarted by "modern" thinking.

jessiraffa likes this.

SAHM to DS BuggaBoo blahblah.gif  12/07, and DD Doozer energy.gif03/10.  Sharing life with The Hubby since 01/05.

Lazurii is offline  
#17 of 37 Old 01-29-2013, 08:13 AM
 
skycheattraffic's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 2,699
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm going to preface this with the fact that DD has been very easygoing as a baby and is generally fairly mellow.
Please don't hate me but I'm on the other end of the scale. DD is 22 months old and nurses to nap, at bedtime and 1 to 3 times overnight. I never nightweaned her and offered lots until about 18 months and she nursed anywhere from 8 to 12 times in 24 hours, sometimes more. What changed is that I became pregnant and as the nipple pain increased, I had to go the don't offer don't refuse route. I will still absolutely nurse her more often if she asks or seems to need it but I just couldn't keep up with her. DD is also in her own room on a (very low) double bed. I nurse her down and then I'm able to leave 30-75 minutes later. She sleeps better in her own space and twice has slept 11 hours and 3 or 4 times has gone 7 or 8 hours. When I stay in bed with her, she wants to nurse every 1.5 to 3 hours all night.
I posted this not as a brag but to highlight that
A) my DD has a completely different personality/disposition
B) we are not cosleeping and
C) I'm pregnant which usually changes/diminishes the milk supply.
So we have opposite circumstances with very different children that result in different nursing frequency. I'm honestly a little sad that she cut back so drastically and I wasn't expecting to be pregnant this soon. I would have been happy to nurse her more often longer. I'm fully aware that many toddlers have a higher need for nursing and that it's completely natural. I may be in your exact shoes in a couple of years if our second LO turns out to be more attached to nursing. Heck, I may be there in August once DD sees the newborn nursing all the time lol. Keep up the good work mamas! You are wonderful for continuing to meet your toddlers' needs.
skycheattraffic is offline  
#18 of 37 Old 01-29-2013, 11:02 AM
 
luckiest's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: TX
Posts: 703
Mentioned: 9 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 25 Post(s)

Pickle, that is wonderful news!!!  Our children must be bound by some unworldly cosmic force, because I came here to report a similar breakthrough!

 

DS went ALL.NIGHT. without nursing.  ALL NIGHT.  I woke up once, immediately thought how weird it was that I was facing the outside of the bed, away from DS, then realized I was awake but didn't hear him...looked over and he was snuggled up to DH, so I went back to sleep.  At 7am he asked to nurse - ASKED, didn't cry for it - and I commented to DH - "Holy $h!t, he slept all night!" and DH said, "Uh, no he didn't."  HAHA!  He apparently woke up a lot, but DH snuggled him back down.  He usually flips out if DH tried to comfort him at all.

 

That was a few days ago and it hasn't repeated itself, but still - just knowing that it's possible gives me hope.

 

Relatedly, I started trying the Pantley pull-off method (again, for like the fifth time) with actual success!  When we'd tried it before, he would go immediately to the red-zone if I tried to break his suction, so I gave up quickly.  This time, there was no crying at all...I pulled him off, he rooted around and started waking up, so I let him latch back on, pulled him off again after maybe twenty seconds, and he just rolled over and went back to sleep.  After two nights of that, now when he wakes up he only nurses for a minute, if that, and lets go himself and rolls over.  It's a beautiful thing!  His night wakings have also gone from 3-5 times to TWO.  I can handle two.

 

What prompted me to start again is that my nipples started flaking and cracking (either the winter weather or maybe something hormonal because my period finally returned this month) and I physically could not handle the nursing anymore.  During the day he has only been nursing maybe 6 or 7 times...to sleep, when he wakes up, and only once or twice in between.  I hope this pattern holds!!  




Living and loving in ATX with DH (of 7 years) and DS (3.5)
luckiest is online now  
#19 of 37 Old 01-30-2013, 11:47 AM
 
susanmary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 153
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks Ladies..... a laugh ....support... great information.... and the hope of more uninterrupted sleep! <3 :-D
jessiraffa likes this.
susanmary is offline  
#20 of 37 Old 01-30-2013, 11:55 AM - Thread Starter
 
pickle18's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 689
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

nak (of course haha)

 

all - no worries about OT - I think it's directly relevant.  I agree - we are way off track, and some opposition is expected as we trust our instincts instead of the "experts."

 

luckiest - that is AMAZING!!!  Mine also goes straight to red zone, but might be worth a try...

 

nothing earth shattering here - we are more or less back to normal :-) but like luckiest, it was a preview into a different kind of life, for sure (with pros and cons - I hear you on that skycheattraffic!) - trying to savor and enjoy, but with 2 year old molars coming in and DS constantly chomping on my nipples, it's harder sometimes than others hahaha. 


~ Lucky wife of DH blowkiss.gifand loving mama to DS biggrinbounce.gif (04/11) ~

 

treehugger.gif * femalesling.GIF * ecbaby2.gif *cd.gif * familybed1.gif * bf.gif * namaste.gif *

pickle18 is offline  
#21 of 37 Old 02-03-2013, 06:07 AM
 
IdentityCrisisMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 10,710
Mentioned: 5 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 102 Post(s)

Jumping in here a bit late (and haven't read all the responses but plan to go back and read).  How I wish I would have had a forum like this when my LO was a toddler all-day, all-night nurser!!  Fast forward to 10 years later and I have what I consider a more typical toddler nursling. My second LO was really receptive to the "don't ask, don't refuse" idea - probably because I was offering way more than I realized. Although I am totally supportive of CLW and on some level wish that was something that would work for me, we are on the road to parent-led weaning.  We did a month of "don't ask, don't refuse" and are now doing a bit or distraction and offering food before the breast. I'm also having a lot of success with "Boobies go night-night" and have night nursing down to twox/night and one session at daybreak. 

 

Ok... I hope that doesn't sound like I've figured something out. I feel as thought I am a fairly similar mother to this easily weaned (so far) LO as I was to my first who was to my first who was an absolute breast fiend all day - seriously like 50 times a day nurser. If I had more support I feel really strongly that my first was a good candidate for CLW or quite a bit more time unrestricted at the breast because weaning her was really hard. This was a "when you know better you do better".  

 

Anyway, I sympathize and totally remember those days and feel like that's just how some kids are at that age. From my experience with my two kids, one was ready for some gentle parent-led weaning steps by around 2 and the other was most certainly not. 


Mama to DD September 2001 and DD April 2011 *Winner for most typos* eat.gif
IdentityCrisisMama is offline  
#22 of 37 Old 02-05-2013, 11:12 AM - Thread Starter
 
pickle18's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 689
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Thanks, IdentityCrisisMama! smile.gif It does help to have that support - this thread has been very comforting & validating for me, and I appreciate your perspective having had one of each.

 

It kind of cracks me up when people can count daily nursings on one hand, and I can't even begin to keep track of sessions - or even total hours in a day! dizzy.gif  So I liked your "seriously 50 times a day" because that's a number that makes much more sense to me. winky.gif

 

Was your super nurser also a high needs baby/kiddo?


~ Lucky wife of DH blowkiss.gifand loving mama to DS biggrinbounce.gif (04/11) ~

 

treehugger.gif * femalesling.GIF * ecbaby2.gif *cd.gif * familybed1.gif * bf.gif * namaste.gif *

pickle18 is offline  
#23 of 37 Old 02-05-2013, 04:19 PM
 
IdentityCrisisMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 10,710
Mentioned: 5 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 102 Post(s)

Oh, I know, right? When my super nurser was little I probably could have kept track of how often she nursed in 15 minute period and done the math. eyesroll.gif ROTFLMAO.gif

 

My first was not high-needs other than wanting to be worn all day, snuggled all night and nursed at will. Other than that she was pretty easy.  It occurs to me writing that out that some people would define that as high needs. 


Mama to DD September 2001 and DD April 2011 *Winner for most typos* eat.gif
IdentityCrisisMama is offline  
#24 of 37 Old 02-06-2013, 11:26 AM
 
susanmary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 153
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
:-D

Hi identitycrisismama, would it be too nosey to ask what your first born's personality is like now? My son has very similiar preferences so I do find myself wondering ...
susanmary is offline  
#25 of 37 Old 02-06-2013, 12:47 PM
 
silvercloud3's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 20
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

what a wonderful mother you are....Kudos for mother of the year award

silvercloud3 is offline  
#26 of 37 Old 02-06-2013, 12:53 PM
 
silvercloud3's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 20
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

PICKLE 18...what a wonderful mother you are...Kudos to you for mother of the year....try making popsicles out of your breastmilk and try blending bananas or other fruit in with your breastmilk...before freezing....hot chocolat with brestmilk ....its amazing but it works to cut down on the required time he needs to be attached to you ...giving you some more deserved freedom

silvercloud3 is offline  
#27 of 37 Old 02-07-2013, 10:48 AM
 
kentuckymom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 63
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I just found this thread, and I'm so happy I'm not alone! My DD turned 2 late last month, and she's still a frequent nurser. She doesn't nurse quite as much during the day as some of your kids, and she almost never asks in public anymore, but, if we're sitting down at home with stories or a movie she always wants to nurse. She also wants to nurse randomly throughout the day, sometimes just little spurts of a few minutes and sometimes the little spurts turn into 30-60 minute sessions. She nurses for comfort and she also seems to want to nurse sometimes just because it's there. She brings her baby dolls and stuffed animals and asks me to nurse them, and after watching them for a minute she'll want to join in the nursing party :).

 

She nurses to fall asleep for her nap and at night, and nurses frequently throughout the night. We co-sleep, and she's gotten big enough and moves around enough that DH has moved to another room at night. I've contemplated trying to nurse her to sleep in her room and then leaving her (I'm able to get up after she falls asleep both for her nap and at night) to see if not having the breasts right next to her might encourage her to sleep more, but I haven't dared try that yet.

 

Aside from wanting to nurse more than the average two year old, I wouldn't call her a high needs kid. She wanted to be worn pretty much all the time as an infant, but, once she started walking, she became very independent. She plays on her own more happily than her almost 8 year old brother. She always cries initially when I leave her in the church nursery, with a babysitter, etc, but she's always playing happily within a few minutes. She's quite laid back, doesn't get upset easily, and, though she does throw the occasional two year old tantrum, she's a breeze compared to her big brother. 

 

DH would like me to start weaning her, particularly at night, but I love that nursing gives us a special bond and I'm loathe to give it up.

 

FYI, I did child led weaning with her brother, who is now almost 8 years old. He night weaned himself at four months, but day nursing went on until shortly after his 4th birthday.  He just gradually tapered off day weaning the older he got. He was a big comfort nurser and always wanted to nurse if he was hurt or upset, but a few minutes of nursing would satisfy him and then he'd go back to playing. After he weaned, he still needed a comfort object. He absolutely needs to grab a stuffed animal when he's upset, and he gets upset more easily than his two year old sister.


Happy transplanted resident of the "not so deep" Southsmile.gif. Married to a great man for 9 years and countinglove.gif. Mom to two wonderful gifts from God: DS (8) jog.gifalways moving, atypically thinking, ballet dancing boy and long-awaited DD (2) fly-by-nursing1.gifcuddly, curious, fearless, book loving girl.

kentuckymom is offline  
#28 of 37 Old 02-08-2013, 08:04 AM
 
IdentityCrisisMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 10,710
Mentioned: 5 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 102 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by susanmary View Post

:-D

Hi identitycrisismama, would it be too nosey to ask what your first born's personality is like now? My son has very similiar preferences so I do find myself wondering ...

No, not at all. I love talking about my children. orngbiggrin.gif  My first is pretty awesome and plenty independent. In fact, she has been pressuring me to go overseas for a semester and she's only 11. I don't necessarily think that "AP" makes "better kids" (or at least that's now why I parent the way that I do) but I can say that I don't buy the criticism or fear that AP makes clingy or spoiled kids either. Mine was a very attached infant and toddler but then surpassed a lot of her peers in autonomy, confidence and etc. by about 5 years old. Right now she is a sweet,resilient, well adjusted 11 year old kid.  love.gif


Mama to DD September 2001 and DD April 2011 *Winner for most typos* eat.gif
IdentityCrisisMama is offline  
#29 of 37 Old 02-08-2013, 11:22 AM
 
susanmary's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: UK
Posts: 153
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Awe....she sounds absolutely wonderful! Thanks so much! :-D
susanmary is offline  
#30 of 37 Old 02-08-2013, 02:30 PM
 
flyrabbitfly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Seoul, Korea
Posts: 152
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by IdentityCrisisMama View Post

No, not at all. I love talking about my children. orngbiggrin.gif  My first is pretty awesome and plenty independent. In fact, she has been pressuring me to go overseas for a semester and she's only 11. I don't necessarily think that "AP" makes "better kids" (or at least that's now why I parent the way that I do) but I can say that I don't buy the criticism or fear that AP makes clingy or spoiled kids either. Mine was a very attached infant and toddler but then surpassed a lot of her peers in autonomy, confidence and etc. by about 5 years old. Right now she is a sweet,resilient, well adjusted 11 year old kid.  love.gif


Well, this is nice to know! We've been doing AP all along, and one thing I have definitely noticed is that my 32 mo old boy is pretty darned attached, as in: will not generally stand to have me out of his sight. I had thought (from the original studies on attachment) that "attached" babies were generally more ok with being apart from mom. So I have worried that I had done some aspect "wrong" since he is pretty clingy. I had an old grandma tell me that "his problem is your problem" meaning that it was because I carried him too much:(. But it is nice to hear that that strong feeling of independence maybe just down the road still.


"That's the way it is, if that's the way it seems to you."

"Cosi e se vi pare."

Luigi Pirandello

flyrabbitfly is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off