DS is 3.75, libido is still gone -- normal? - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 13 Old 03-19-2013, 07:32 AM - Thread Starter
 
oolongtea's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: nyc/ct
Posts: 114
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

So, DS is 3.75 and nurses just a teeny weeny bit -- one side, five minutes, bedtime only.  But my libido is still nonexistent.  Is that normal?

Will it come back as soon as he is totally weaned, or do I need to look into my hormone levels now?

I'm not on any medications or hormonal birth control.


unschooling in nyc

oolongtea is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
#2 of 13 Old 03-19-2013, 07:37 AM
 
Escaping's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Toronto, Canada
Posts: 659
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I used to do the same, but as soon as I stopped, it came back completely. Hopefully it will for you too. 

blueletterchels likes this.
Escaping is offline  
#3 of 13 Old 04-12-2013, 06:37 AM
 
Marnica's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 5,470
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

I would look at your hormones. If you are really not nursing that much - it would seem to me that there is more going on. I lost my libido after my first DS (he is almost 5). It never came back and now I have another DD who is 1 and it's still gone. I plan on tacking the issue aggressively when she is done nursing. (I have had my hormone levels tested but by the time I did that I was trying to conceive so opted to wait to address the problem. It sux - its a strain on my marriage. I hope you can figure this out!


If the people let government decide what foods they eat and what medicines they take, their bodies will soon be in as sorry a state as are the souls of those who live under tyranny." Thomas Jefferson.

Marnica is offline  
#4 of 13 Old 04-12-2013, 07:07 AM
 
mamazee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: US midwest
Posts: 7,246
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
My libido came back as soon as my period started again. If yours isn't back after so long, and you aren't nursing much, and I'm assuming you're menstruating again, then I'd go to the doctor and have your thyroid checked and that kind of thing. It's probably something other than breastfeeding at that point.
mamazee is offline  
#5 of 13 Old 04-12-2013, 02:00 PM
 
sassyfirechick's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 1,613
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 33 Post(s)

I guess now I don't feel so bad - DD is 17mos and nada here, huge strain on our marriage and initially I chalked it up to BF, but honestly it wasn't all there pre-baby so I can't say I'm all that surprised.  I'm tackling ISR lessons right now with DD which takes up my extra cash but my plan is once classes end, getting in with our ND for a visit - DD needs a follow up on her food issues anyways and I'm interested to see what she can do to help me out!  Although I have a double whammy - no libido plus my midwife was a little too stitch happy post baby and ain't nuthin' stretching that greensad.gif

sassyfirechick is online now  
#6 of 13 Old 04-12-2013, 03:25 PM
 
BfeedingBabies's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 16
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Hormones are such hard work at times!!  Definitely look into yours, you can do a fair bit with just food changes - making sure you aren't getting low blood sugar makes a huge difference

Also the thyroid mentioned earlier - making sure that's working well means that your energy levels are more likely to make you more receptive too

Good luck (and go you for having an extended feeding relationship!)


Check out my website www.breastfeeding-babies.com for extra information.

Enjoy your breastfeeding and mothering journey!

BfeedingBabies is offline  
#7 of 13 Old 04-13-2013, 11:37 AM
 
erinsuzy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: Norwalk Ohio
Posts: 63
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Mine has been gone since about 2008, and I'm still waiting for it to come back! And on top of that my body has taken quite a battering from all my pregnancies, subconsciously affecting my self esteem-  which has not helped the situation. I get to where I start exercising and then I stop after a week or two. (I don't want to seem like I am complaining though because my little ones are worth the world to me.) I have also been told to check my hormones but I never got the chance because now I am pregnant again, but when I get to check them I hope it helps me. I was also told that a lot of people are iodine deficient and it can cause problems in your health. As we know iodine is what helps the thyroid to produce hormones. About 2 weeks ago I started taking liquid iodine every other day so I have not noticed any improvement/difference yet.

Are hormone issues usually the cause for libido problems? Does anyone know?


 novaxnocirc.gif cd.gif   homebirth.jpg    lady.gif of 4:bikenew.gif5 yr    blahblah.gif    4 yr   sleepytime.gif   2 yr   baby.gif  2 mo
erinsuzy is offline  
#8 of 13 Old 04-13-2013, 01:40 PM
 
blessedbyblues's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 30
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I had almost the worst of hormonal issues after I had LO. I lost all my pregnancy weight in just a few weeks, but from that point on, I gained very rapidly; 100 pounds in ten months and thirty more by the time it was done about six months after that. I was tired, sluggish, foggy, angry, depressed, and sleepless. I finally had a 24 hour adrenal urine test, the results of which indicated I had Cushing's Disease, BUT my dad urged me to delve further so I paid out of pocket for a 24 hour adrenal SALIVA test. Those results indicated adrenal fatigue, not Cushing's. I also had my thyroid checked and it was terribly low. I've now been taking natural desiccated thyroid for a year, and I use progesterone and pregnenolone to stabilize and aid my adrenal function, along with a clean, grain free diet, and a daily supplement regimen. The tests were simple, but finding a doctor to interpret them correctly was a challenge. I finally consulted my chiropractor and did my own research. I've lost seventy-five pounds and I have fifty-five to go. I'm still nursing my LO and he will be four in May. I got my libido back about three months after I started treating my hormonal imbalances. And you don't have to be morbidly obese as I was to have adrenal fatigue. I have a friend who has struggled for YEARS to gain weight, lower her blood pressure, get her blood sugar balanced, and get some sleep. Turns out, she officially has adrenal fatigue, too (after I told her repeatedly she had all the symptoms LOL).
blessedbyblues is offline  
#9 of 13 Old 04-13-2013, 07:02 PM
 
KermitII63's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 115
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

My libido didn't come back until I got my first moon cycle since becoming pregnant, which for me, was when DS was 2.5. Around that same time my milk dried up and nursing became very uncomfortable. My libido was almost nonexistant, and in the course of a few weeks, it was back at full swing, actually fuller swing I think than it was pre-pregnancy, which was a lot of fun and a huge relief for me and DH. We had basically no sex life for more than 3 years--that was rough, but we got through it. Even if you're nursing just a tiny bit, the nursing hormones are there, and that can change everything. I wouldn't worry about it--it's just the universe's way of telling you to put energies elsewhere right now (and hopefully DH understands!)
 

KermitII63 is offline  
#10 of 13 Old 04-14-2013, 12:07 PM
 
dawnetorres's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 17
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

This makes total sense to me especially if a person already has adrenal fatigue before getting pregnant. Having a child only makes the situation worsen with the lack of sleep and stress. Not complaining because I too am so happy to be a mom and would give the world for it. I have had libido issues even after weaning, but because of my background in health know that now that I've weaned its time for a good detox (which I start tomorrow Yay!!) and endocrine support. Thank you for your response,

dawnetorres is offline  
#11 of 13 Old 04-15-2013, 04:28 PM
 
sparklefairy's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,915
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Making absolutely no assumptions about you or your life or family. In my case, my (now ex)husband was treating me very poorly, sometimes abusively, and it drastically affected my libido. It just happened to coincide with having little kids.

 

I noticed this shift in other families, where things had been fairly egalitarian before kids but become more traditional in gender-role-division-of-labor after, and this seemed to be a source of resentment for some of my friends.

 

If there are other things that aren't working in a relationship, it can affect desire for sure. I felt it bore mentioning, as I think there can be an attitude of "should" in our culture with regard to sexual activity in a relationship, as if it's some separate thing from the rest of life.
 

sparklefairy is offline  
#12 of 13 Old 04-17-2013, 01:46 PM
 
3lilchunklins's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: western NC
Posts: 1,581
Mentioned: 3 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 33 Post(s)
Just a thought, blood flow increases libido, so maybe try some kegels. At least it can't hurt to try!

I totally agree with the PP, sometimes it's the relationship that increases, decreases, or sometimes kills libido

bfinfant.gif  Breastfeeding, non-vaxing, homeschooling, baby wearing, cosleeping, non-cic'ing mama to CJsuperhero.gifAGdust.gifJJnono02.gifSDbabyboy.gif  And married my highschool sweetheart lovestory.gif

And expecting #5 in Nov. 2014 heartbeat.gif
3lilchunklins is online now  
#13 of 13 Old 04-18-2013, 03:53 PM
 
moving toward's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 64
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

very very common - but no not normal. You should be able to have some positive affect by taking action through your preferred health care. Make sure that you are eating and resting well and check your self esteem, and your relationship. Mine improved after talking to my dh about the fact that he could be a little patronising at times and noone wants to be having sex with their father.

moving toward is offline  
Reply

Tags
Breastfeeding , Breastfeeding Beyond Infancy

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off