Do you have any IRL friends still nursing? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 40 Old 02-17-2005, 09:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Are you a lone ranger or do you have real life friends who nurse older babies and up? I dont' know if I would have emotionally handled family pressure ok without my friends to see nursing their babies to remind me it's normal. But I know a lot of mommies out there are alone? What about you? What's your support network look like?
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#2 of 40 Old 02-17-2005, 09:38 PM
 
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Umm... I have hung out with Meco (MDC mama) a couple times. I think she is still nursing her 2 yo, but actually I never asked. Hmmm... Meco, are you?

I only have a few friends w/ babies, most are younger than mine, and the older toddlers were all weaned around 6-8 mo. One mama friend (with 2 toddlers) was soooooooo impressed that I was still nursing at 9 mo. It was wierd, I didn't know what to say. She was paying me a compliment, but I didn't know how to take it without putting her down, yk? Her dh is a doctor, so it's not like she doesn't know the benefits...

I do wish I had EBFing friends. But at least none of my friends have criticized me for it. If they are thinking anything bad, they aren't saying it, cuz they know I would rip them a new one. But I don't think they're thinking it; I think for the most part they know I am an intelligent person who makes informed decisions, and they respect me.
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#3 of 40 Old 02-17-2005, 11:23 PM
 
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Well, given that many of my friends we met at LLL, yes I know several people still nursing.

Two good friends recently weaned their sons (one at 2.75 the other at 4.75). Another good friend is still nursing her son who is 52 months (her DD weaned at 5 years).

Several of the mothers at my DD's "school" are nursing their children who range in age from babies to almost 2. I am quite certain DS is the oldest child who is nursing there (or that the people have *ever* known).

Family--- my nieces and nephews were nursed from zero days to 14 months. But, they are mostly older (the only one younger than DS is actually my sis's step-son).

Other friends--- weaned at or around one year (at the latest).

At this point I don't really need the support to feel "okay" about what I am doing. I am much more confident than when DD was say, 13, 14, 15 months... or even harder 24, 25, 26 months. I do wonder how I will feel when/if DS is still nursing after DD had weaned (50 months) but I have another 9 months to deal with that, lol. The oldest nursling I have known well IRL weaned right at 5 years, so if he goes longer than that I am sure it will be a big time of questioning for me, but that is a LOOOOOONG time away.

 

 

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#4 of 40 Old 02-17-2005, 11:49 PM
 
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most of my homeschool friends who have younger children nurse them. All of my playgroup friends nurse their babies, some nurse older children as well. I am really amazed at the amount of real life support I've found! Nobody bats an eye at the idea of my almost four year old still nursing occassionally.
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#5 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 12:08 AM
 
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I know lots of mamas here in CT through Friendly Forest and a couple other groups who nurse "older" children. I know tandem nursing mamas, mamas nursing (or who have nursed) 3, 4 and 5+ year olds, pregnant and nursing mamas ... I'm very blessed!

When my oldest was young I had a different group of "mainstream" friends. We slowly drifted apart and I think it was mostly due to the fact that my parenting style was much different from most of theirs and my belief that child-led weaning is best for our family made some of them uncomfortable. A few were friends since high school and it was disappointing to lose their friendship, but I think I'm much better off being friendly with them when I run into them but not hanging out with them.

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#6 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 02:01 AM
 
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Coming out of lurkdom to say, I have only met two people IRL who have /had nurslings as old as dd#1(29 months). One was at LLL and the other an online friend from another board I frequent. I have one friend from church who nursed her dd until 15 months. Th eother babes I know were weaned at a year or less.

It is very hard not to have real live people to talk to about nursing todders and tandem nursing. That's why I'm so thankful for internet.
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#7 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 03:05 AM
 
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I know at least five mamas from church who nursed until 12 - 13 months and then felt it was time to promptly wean.

But in our AP playgroup, there are some mamas nursing 3 year olds still. It's fun when we've gone to the museum as a group. You could see one mama nursing a 19 m.o., another mama nursing her 13 m.o. and then her 3 y.o, and another mama nursing her 2 y.o. We're quite a site.

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#8 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 12:25 PM
 
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We are stuck in a very conservative area. I am fairly new here, so only know a few mamas with children of similar age (between 1 and 2 years old) The other mamas weaned at 12 months, like it was a milestone. Paige is 15 months and still nursing like a champ. We plan to self-wean.

One of the mamas in our playgroup made a comment about Paige's extended bf-ing, saying that she weaned as soon as the ped recommended year was up, because didn't want her daughter to remember it.

Now, I am happy to say that my dh is very supportive. He told the woman that he hoped Paige would remember bf-ing, and how much she enjoyed her special time with mama. I my husband!

nak
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#9 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 12:29 PM
 
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Unfortunately, it seemed like I was the only EBF'er on the planet. None of my friends BF'ed, and none of my family either chose not to BF or only BF for 6 weeks.

That is awesome what your DH said, Hokiemum! I think DD does remember nursing, she self weaned at 17 months, which is fine by me!
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#10 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 12:31 PM
 
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When ds was about 8 months and we went to LLL for the first time, there were several moms nursing toddlers and/or tandem nursing. That was a big huge encouragement to me for looking into it further, and once I'd realized how healthy it is for both of us, a huge help in continuing in spite of some family pressure.

Now I am acquainted with 3 mamas "still" nursing, only one isn't an MDC mama.
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#11 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 12:32 PM
 
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I'm a Lone Ranger. I don't know anyone IRL who has nursed passed 12-13 months.

My playgroup friends all stop nursing before 6 months.

DD is 25 months and I plan to CLW
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#12 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 12:35 PM
 
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I remembered one! I know an AWESOME woman who bf'ed her dd until age 3! Her dd is now 17. This woman is not a friend, we just have friends in comon, but we have met a few times and each time ds has nursed in front of her and she is soooooo encouragng. As much as I love getting support here, there is just nothing like IRL support.
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#13 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 03:24 PM
 
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I don't know anyone irl who has a nursing toddler. I know of 2 women in a club who have olderchildren that were in LLL or nursed until 2-3yo. The rest of the women I know either nursed until 12mo or didn't nurse at all.

Thank goodness for my DH and MDC!
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#14 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 06:14 PM
 
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I am very fortunate that my two closest girlfriends IRL are also nursing a 12 month old and a 13 month old. Also, I am in MOMS Club and there are several moms nursing babies beyond a year
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#15 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 06:16 PM
 
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The only person I've met in Wichita, KS that is or was nursing a toddler is our local LLL leader.

I'm the lone ranger, and while I don't get really any push-back from DH or relatives or friends, I don't exactly have "support" either.

I have an acquaintance who's having a baby in Julyish, and I'm really hoping that she might nurse longer than a year, by seeing me do it. She's kind of a dunderhead, though, so she probably won't.

It would be sooo neat to know someone who's like me IRL.
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#16 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 06:24 PM
 
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I'd say I'm a lone ranger, I have one acquantance that I know has EBFed but she lives across country so I never see her. I use to work with her mother. I think most of my friends and family think I'm a freak and some have eluded to that but I'm too old to care what they think!

I do plan on going to my first LLL meeting at the end of this month so I'm hoping to meet like-minded Mommies.

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#17 of 40 Old 02-18-2005, 06:56 PM
 
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Through LLL I know lots of extended nursing mamas, but outside of LLL, no. One of my IRL friends nursed her son until he was 21 months & intoduced me to cloth dipes.

HokiMum- I have nursed *in* Kingsport, when we were eating lunch there while passing thru. I love NIP in places like that, trying to subtly encourage (or shock ) other moms.

An extrovert, married to my introverted dh since '01, mothering my girls C (2003) and G (2006).

 

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#18 of 40 Old 02-19-2005, 04:45 AM
 
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My Aunt nursed my cous until after her 2nd bday. So that takes the pressure off me a little. As for friends...nope, I don't know anyone who extended bf.

-signed 19 mos and going!
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#19 of 40 Old 02-19-2005, 09:17 PM
 
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I know at least a couple mamas who nursed their toddlers when I used to live. One woman I know nursed her about 2.5 yo son through a subsequent pregnancy and told everyone in the playgroup (not an AP playgroup) she planned to tandem. She reads Mothering, don't ya know. Another woman I know nursed to around age two, but I'm not sure if she weaned when she got pregnant with the next one or not. I moved, and I don't know anyone here, though. I hope I'll meet some IRL friends here who nurse longer than the norm soon.
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#20 of 40 Old 02-19-2005, 09:54 PM
 
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I now a couple of mommas in RL nursing, but their babies are both under a year yet. I don't know if the one will go beyond that or not, and the other posts here and most certainly will if I'm any judge of comments.

Most of my friends are beyond this age with their kids.

"What will you do once you know?"
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#21 of 40 Old 02-19-2005, 10:44 PM
 
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I'm pretty much it around here. My two friends with toddlers close in age weaned at 2.5 months (a preemie! : ) and 8 months... I don't really feel like I need anyone for support cause I'm happy with our decision. OTOH, I wish I had some other people IRL to talk to about nursing a toddler. Oh well, I do my best to educate by NIP as often as I can!
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#22 of 40 Old 02-20-2005, 01:17 AM
 
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I'm the only person IRL I know who breastfed her baby let alone her toddler. I've gotten a few when are you going to wean comments but mostly I think people leave me alone just because if they open that can of worms I'm going there with medical studies and everything else, so no one really says anything to me.

My mom has been really supportive up to this point but if I go past 2 I imagine she'll frown a bit, we'll see.

Otherwise, I'm with BooBerry, I'm comfortable with my decision but it'd be awful nice to have a RL friend to talk to............
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#23 of 40 Old 02-20-2005, 01:25 AM
 
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Great name btw!

Sadly I actually know no one that nurses period. Or cloth diapers for the matter. One of my best friends couldnt get her baby to latch so she pumped for 9 months and that was it. My MOm nursed me till 9 months. I plan on letting my DC self wean though and I dont really care what everyone says(everyone has their comments)

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#24 of 40 Old 02-20-2005, 01:36 AM
 
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Well I met Jen (alstrameria) online and found out that there are actually extended nursers in Sudbury (go figure!!) and she introduced me to the naps chapter here so I get to feel normal once a month

My sister nursed her DD until she was 18 months old (kicking and screaming most of the way from 1 year on but she did it).

Steph

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#25 of 40 Old 02-20-2005, 11:20 AM
 
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I am finding it really hard to believe that I could find extended breastfeeding friends here, and you all can't where you live! Perhaps maybe you just aren't looking in the right places, or perhaps you do know people who nurse "in the closet" and just don't do it out and about or talk about it.
My local LLL isn't the place to find support. I found most of my new mommy friends by joining an eclectic (secular) homeschool support group when my oldest was about 18 months old. seems strange perhaps, but I've always known I would homeschool/unschool my children, and I wanted her to have friends who weren't going to start kindergarten in a few years. And imagine my suprise, when one of the moms was nursing her baby, finished up, and her four year old climbed in her lap for a snack, too! I knew right then and there that group was for me.
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#26 of 40 Old 02-20-2005, 05:10 PM
 
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My roommate has a son a few weeks older than mine (they are 24.5 and 26 mos) and both our boys still nurse all the time. Another friend is weaning her 16 mo. old and even our child-less friends are a bit shocked. Another is nursing her 4 mo. old with plans of continuing for years to come. We also belong to a toddler LLL group so there are a lot of nursing toddlers there, many with little siblings nursing as well!
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#27 of 40 Old 02-20-2005, 10:16 PM
 
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I don't have any EBFing friends in "real life" at all. I've never been to a LLL meeting but was thinking of looking one up now that DS is 3. My mom and DH were pretty supportive up to about age 2, but now they just silently tolerate our EBFing. Anyone who knows me well knows not to challenge my decision on this topic, but still it is lonely sometimes without a real life friend with similar experience.
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#28 of 40 Old 02-21-2005, 01:39 AM
 
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I have some friends from LLL who are nursing toddlers. Our leader's little boy just weaned at age 3 (on his own) and there is another almost weaned 3 year old there, otherwise I currently have the oldest toddler at 20 1/2 mos. Three of us went out to lunch after last meeting and I'm sure were quite a site in the restaurant with 3 toddlers nursing during lunch!
I also know a couple moms from church who have extended nursed, but most of their kids were weaned by 2 1/2 or so. Our previous youth pastor's wife was nursing a 4 yr old, though.
I have only a couple patients in my practice who nursed into toddlerhood, unfortuntately. My favorite story was a little boy who just weaned while his mom was pregnant at just shy of 3. He was one of the first newborns I saw in private practice and his mom was very discouraged and ready to quit due to jaundice and a sleepy baby. We made a plan to get him nursing more frequently, weighed him frequently for a while, and he did great! It was wonderful to see him over the next 3 years and feel good about helping him get going!
I just joined LLL when my last baby was born, and kicked myself for not seeking out such great IRL support when my other babes were little. It's wonderful to go somewhere where I can nurse without thinking about it, vent about it if I need to, and not get horrified "Why isn't she weaned?" comments!
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#29 of 40 Old 02-21-2005, 01:58 PM
 
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I'm a lucky mama here in the state of WA! I know a handful of nursing mamas mostly all with toddlers, preschoolers...mostly all of them are MDC mamas.

Tamera hearts.gifwife to Rod moon.gif Mama to Ty jammin.gif Nathan Peace.gif Hunter bikenew.gifMila energy.gifAndrew sleepytime.gif Kyle REPlaySkateboard04HL.gif& our last baby # 7 due June 2011 1sttri.gif We homeschool.gif  nocirc.gifcd.gif  h20homebirth.gif
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#30 of 40 Old 02-21-2005, 02:08 PM
 
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Here is a picture of myself and one of my best friends... nursing Lily and Judy, who are also best friends! The girls are 2 yrs 2 months and 2 yrs 4 months in this pic. Im gonna frame it

LIly and Judy age 2

nursing toddler best friends!
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