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#61 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 05:37 PM
 
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Originally Posted by numom499
I wouldn't go to babycenter and ask for sling r ecommendations, and would be grateful if someone on babycenter directed me to mdc.

exactly.
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#62 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 05:38 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mama ganoush
if that is the case, then in the immortal words of joan jett-i don't give a damn about my bad reputation.
Sing it loud and sing it proud!!

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#63 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 05:40 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mama ganoush
and exactly where does ap have "a bad reputation"? among folks who think cio and spanking is just dandy? if that is the case, then in the immortal words of joan jett-i don't give a damn about my bad reputation.

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#64 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 05:45 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mama ganoush
i would appreciate you not speaking for me. this post had lots of views, but very few replies. the op is relatively new here, so i kindly suggested that this might not be the best place to get good advice on cribs.
and exactly where does ap have "a bad reputation"? among folks who think cio and spanking is just dandy? if that is the case, then in the immortal words of joan jett-i don't give a damn about my bad reputation.
I'm not speaking for you. I found your comment (and the comments of others) to be snarky. Whether you meant it that way or not, I don't know. Just stating how I read it.

As for AP's bad reputation? Lots of people think AP parents are judgmental know-it-alls. And these are not people who spank or CIO or ff by choice. Just average parents who have been turned off AP because of threads like this or drive-by comments about bfing, etc.

And the comment about bashing AP moms? No one was bashing AP moms. They were criticizing snarky, judgmental moms.
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#65 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 05:46 PM
 
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gee, exalted ap snobs sure sounded like a criticism of ap parents.
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#66 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 05:51 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mama ganoush
gee, exalted ap snobs sure sounded like a criticism of ap parents.
Maybe exalted MDC snobs would have been a better choice?
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#67 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 05:53 PM
 
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Actually, there was no need to call names, especially since it's against that little user agreement you signed.

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#68 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 05:54 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Amys1st
Not all of us are exalted ap snobs btw. Most of us are humble folks, so I do say sorry for the reception you received.

I have a crib- oh no take away my ap snob club card!!
Dude - read it. Certainly sounds like bashing AP Moms to me. As does this:
Quote:
Lots of people think AP parents are judgmental know-it-alls. And these are not people who spank or CIO or ff by choice. Just average parents who have been turned off AP because of threads like this or drive-by comments about bfing, etc.
I'm like scratching my head trying to figure out how these comments are considered acceptable when suggesting that someone reconsider the use of a crib are not.

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#69 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 05:55 PM
 
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And I saw very few people being snarky other than yourself criticizing people and their perspectives.
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And the comment about bashing AP moms? No one was bashing AP moms. They were criticizing snarky, judgmental moms.

It's lonely being the only XX in a house of XYs.
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#70 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:01 PM
 
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Originally Posted by tbarthauer
Maybe exalted MDC snobs would have been a better choice?
if you dislike it here so much, and hold us in such obvious contempt, there's a simple solution.
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#71 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:04 PM
 
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How is it acceptable when someone comes here to ask for suggestions about a crib to tell her that she shouldn't be putting her baby in a "cage" or letting dc CIO? She wasn't asking whether or not to co-sleep. She's made the decision she feels is best for her family and was just looking for suggestions on how to implement it. Why is it so hard on MDC to accept that there is more than one way of lovingly raising a child? She flat out says at the beginning of her post that she only wants helpful suggestions because, I'm guessing, she's been around MDC long enough to know that certain members will jump all over someone who has made different choices than they have.

It's a crib for crying out loud. She wasn't asking for suggestions on how to let her dc CIO. If someone doesn't have something to suggest regarding a CRIB then maybe they shouldn't have posted on this thread to begin with?
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#72 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:05 PM
 
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maybe you aren't Hall Monitor of the Internets and don't get to dictate what threads people choose to respond to, or how they choose to respond.
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#73 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:09 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mama ganoush
if you dislike it here so much, and hold us in such obvious contempt, there's a simple solution.
And that is always the response when someone dares to suggest that maybe there should be less snark on MDC. No, I don't plan on going anywhere. There are enough people here who are capable of giving constructive advice support without the other garbage that I do get a lot from being here.
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#74 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:10 PM
 
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She didn't say that at the beginning of her posts. She edited to ADD that after she didn't like what we were saying. Once again though, no one can dictate what we say and if it's "support only" unless they have their own tribe. I suggest forming one. Maybe call it "the non-exalted AP/MDC mom tribe" and make yourself feel at home?

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#75 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:10 PM
 
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Ist of all, I've read the original post and No she didn't ask for support only. THAT was added after people made other noncrib related helpful thoughts.

Quote:
Pro's and cons are welcomed and encouraged!
Was in the ORIGINAL OP before editting.

2nd SUPPORT ONLY Posts aren't allowed anywhere but in the tribal area and spirituallity.

3rdly

This is MOTHERING.COM. THE Natural Family Living Site. Look at the banner, that's what it says. OF COURSE women (and men) on this board are going to advocate for the NATURAL way before a crib, especially since that's what a boatload of them have done.

Seriously, don't like all the NATURAL LIVING families here, there are other websites that might suit you better.

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#76 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:11 PM
 
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I see the other ladies have said all this while I was posting. I guess I'll just be redundant.

It's lonely being the only XX in a house of XYs.
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#77 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:13 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Pynki
I see the other ladies have said all this while I was posting. I guess I'll just be redundant.

always appreciate your thoughts, redundant or not.
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#78 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:13 PM
 
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There is a big difference between suggesting there should be less snark and adding your own snarky insults.

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#79 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:13 PM
 
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Originally Posted by tbarthauer
And that is always the response when someone dares to suggest that maybe there should be less snark on MDC.
yeah, if you repeatedly bash a community and its members, well it is no wonder you have been shown the door before.
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#80 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:18 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Pynki
Ist of all, I've read the original post and No she didn't ask for support only. THAT was added after people made other noncrib related helpful thoughts.
I didn't read her OP before it was edited but isn't it sad that she had to add any such message?

Wow, you guys are really missing my point. Even Dr. Sears says that the family bed doesn't work for everyone. Why should someone who has made a decision about how her family is going to sleep have to put up with all the anti-crib comments? That is NOT being helpful.
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#81 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:23 PM
 
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The family bed may not be for everyone. But don't go looking for support of non co-sleeping on a NFL AP website and expect people to welcome you with open arms and a pat on the back.
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#82 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:24 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mama ganoush
yeah, if you repeatedly bash a community and its members, well it is no wonder you have been shown the door before.
How is suggesting that we try to be a little less judgmental of others' choices bashing MDC? As I said, there are lots of people on here that I learn a lot from. There are others, however, who could be a lot more effective advocates of AP if they would stop sitting in judgment of others and responding harshly when someone needs help.
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#83 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:26 PM
 
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Just have to jump in and be redundant too. I responded in what I thought was a helpful way - a lot of people never considered NOT having a crib. AND this is MDC, like it or not. There was no need for the OP or anyone else to be offended that people suggested not using a crib. In the OP there was no indication that a crib was a sure thing for them, just a question with a request for input.

-Angela
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#84 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:27 PM
 
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I respectfully ask that people go back and READ THE THREAD! There were no snarky comments made and only people trying to give advice and then someone comes along and bashes AP Moms for apparently not being the first authority on crib information. The fact is this thread was fine and dandy until people started dictating what answers were appropriate. Give me a break.

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#85 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:36 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tbarthauer
How is suggesting that we try to be a little less judgmental of others' choices bashing MDC? As I said, there are lots of people on here that I learn a lot from. There are others, however, who could be a lot more effective advocates of AP if they would stop sitting in judgment of others and responding harshly when someone needs help.
Where do we draw the line? Is it only ok if you say it is? Should we not be "judgmental" to spanking, CIO, formula feeding by choice, circumcising, etc.. parents? Why do you get to dictate what we think is appropriate to ask about on an AP site?

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#86 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:36 PM
 
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Originally Posted by tbarthauer
I didn't read her OP before it was edited but isn't it sad that she had to add any such message?

Wow, you guys are really missing my point. Even Dr. Sears says that the family bed doesn't work for everyone. Why should someone who has made a decision about how her family is going to sleep have to put up with all the anti-crib comments? That is NOT being helpful.

well then, are mdc members required to be 'helpful' when people ask for advice on cio or spanking, cause they have decided that is what is best for their family? the very huge and sophomorically obvious point that you are missing is that MDC stands for something. At least it used to. And the people who threw the snark are the ones who clearly don't really support what mdc stands for. which begs the obvious question.
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#87 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:38 PM
 
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Originally Posted by tbarthauer
There are others, however, who could be a lot more effective advocates of AP if they would stop sitting in judgment of others and responding harshly when someone needs help.

how is nicely telling someone, with a smile no less, that they might find better information at another website responding harshly?
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#88 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:39 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Kathryn
Where do we draw the line? Is it only ok if you say it is? Should we not be "judgmental" to spanking, CIO, formula feeding by choice, circumcising, etc.. parents? Why do you get to dictate what we think is appropriate to ask about on an AP site?
: I love you.... sniff.... I was going to post something about this, but I couldn't get it down to a reasonable and moderately on topic bit....

so allow me to :

-Angela
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#89 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:40 PM - Thread Starter
 
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holy moly, I'm really sorry I started anything this disruptive!!

I do know that co-sleeping is an aspect of AP, and I guess I ignorantly thought it'd be okay to talk about a crib... since I've seen other threads about a crib, and disposable dipes, and formula feeding.

I think this should stop now, it's not healthy for anyone, and makes me sad and uncomfortable, and embarrased.

I'm sorry, and thank you all for your useful input and opintion.
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#90 of 178 Old 03-18-2006, 06:42 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mama ganoush
well then, are mdc members required to be 'helpful' when people ask for advice on cio or spanking, cause they have decided that is what is best for their family? the very huge and sophomorically obvious point that you are missing is that MDC stands for something. At least it used to. And the people who threw the snark are the ones who clearly don't really support what mdc stands for. which betgs the obvious question.
No, advice shouldn't be given on how to spank or CIO because those things are not AP. I think, though, rather than jump all over someone asking about those things it would be good to gentley tell them MDC doesn't advocate these things and why. How else would someone learn why these things are harmful.

As for crib sleeping, I included those quotes from Dr. Sears to show that cribs can be a part of AP/NFL. The assumption that cribs can't be AP is my main problem with some of the posts on this thread.
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