Motivating Hubby to do more around the house & yard - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 01-27-2007, 09:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Just like me my dh is tired and ready to crash at the end of the day when he gets home from work. Just like I let the dishes stack up he also does nothing about the dog poop, pile of junk, dead grass and leaves, ect...around the house. Yes i can do most of this but come on i cant even keep up with laundry and dishes!!! I feel like both of us give into our lack of motivation and just dont do any of it. I feel a little "white trash" with our kids playing in the back yard where there is poop.

what do you do to motivate your dh or How do you ask your husband to do things that just have to be done. I feel like i am always nagging about the list of things to be done and in my case nagging will get me no where. sometimes i ask nicely and we discuss things and he says, Oh yeah i'll do that tomorrow for sure.......but often it doesnt happen. i want to me positive and motivating without being a pushover and letting him get away with not doing anything, ultimately if he doesnt so some of it i'll have to do all of it with 4 kids in tow.

Angela: Catholic Homeschooling Mom to Sierra(11/00), twins Addison & Kendall(3/03), Jack(4/06), Brielle (7/08), Levi (2/2011); due with#7 (9/13). Birthed every witch way.....hospital. C section. VbAC. Unassisted water birth (hypno/painless). Assisted waterbirth to an almost 10lber! (Not painless!)
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#2 of 3 Old 01-29-2007, 02:18 PM
 
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well, first, we don't clean up dog poop, too lazy! but, you could try what I did about 8 yrs ago, i had a 'fake' nervous breakdown about how i couldn't do everything around the house and i know he is tired but i am too and we are a team and blah blah blah, add lots of tears too! i haven't cleaned a toilet or shower in 8 yrs.
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#3 of 3 Old 01-29-2007, 05:03 PM
 
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Years ago, DH and I were fighting about this and he was truely convinced that he had the lion's share of the chores. We got out the handy dandy legal pad and each listed all of the things we did or should be doing. We all know who had the longer list, correct?

Once you have your list in yellow and black, you can start breaking it down by how often, etc. I have to question though, if he is working out of the home and you are home with the kids, how reasonable is it to expect him to do more when you admit you aren't even getting the dishes and the laundry done?

I have four kids, so I do understand, but picking up the dog poop on a daily basis would only take a minute. It's when you let things build up that they become a problem. I found by using Flylady's routines, I do just a few minutes of all of my tasks on a daily basis and nothing builds up.

So, prioritize items and those neither of you really want to do can be hired out. Some neighbor kid would probably like to make a few bucks a week doing the yardwork and the poop clean-up.
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