Work full time or SAH...WWYD? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums
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#31 of 44 Old 12-22-2008, 06:28 PM
 
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You're going to school full time starting next month? So the job would be on top of that? Or do you mean it would be 40-60 hours between school and work?

Actually, whatever way you answer that question would likely be irrelevant to my thoughts on the subject... if you want to be at home, and are in a position to do that, then go ahead and follow your heart's desire. When you're 80, you're not likely to look back with regret that you didn't take advantage of free babysitting to pay your debt off a couple years faster. But you very well might regret not doing what you really wanted to do - be there with your baby for those early years.

Melanie
Magical Mama, joyfully home educating my three wonders: FR (12/02), EG (05/05), DK (06/09)
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#32 of 44 Old 12-22-2008, 09:19 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by KoalaMama View Post
You're going to school full time starting next month? So the job would be on top of that? Or do you mean it would be 40-60 hours between school and work?

Actually, whatever way you answer that question would likely be irrelevant to my thoughts on the subject... if you want to be at home, and are in a position to do that, then go ahead and follow your heart's desire. When you're 80, you're not likely to look back with regret that you didn't take advantage of free babysitting to pay your debt off a couple years faster. But you very well might regret not doing what you really wanted to do - be there with your baby for those early years.

On top of school. But my university is great : and offers all their classes in evening and online formats as well as traditional. I am taking all online.

Mama to expecting Babe 2
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#33 of 44 Old 12-23-2008, 12:38 AM
 
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I'd SAH, too - but keep checking with your Mom if she can still watch your little one when he's 2 or 3!

working and not having to pay for childcare does sound pretty great! but put it off for as long as you can
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#34 of 44 Old 12-23-2008, 09:50 AM
 
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On top of school. But my university is great : and offers all their classes in evening and online formats as well as traditional. I am taking all online.
Wow. Personally, I cannot imagine how I could work out of the home 60 hours a week, do full time studies and still care for a baby, spouse and home. Managing any time for your family or self would be a real challenge. And when would you sleep??

Melanie
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#35 of 44 Old 12-23-2008, 01:22 PM
 
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Stay at home. Ditch the guilt. Work on budgeting saving so you have more to put into the debt, if you feel you need to *do* something about it.

And give your dh lots of . He deserves it, with his response to you. What a great guy. :
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#36 of 44 Old 12-23-2008, 01:40 PM
 
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It sounds like you want to stay home - DO IT! If you are able to pay off some of your debt right now, you can use the wise mamas here to help you budget even more, and get to stay with your little baby.

Think about it: on your death bed, are you going to regret that you stayed home when your babe was little, or are you going to regret taking a little longer to pay off your debt?

(and I understand not wanting to be in debt, but if you are budgeting wisely and paying down every month, I think the time with your babe is more important than taking a bit longer to pay down the debt.) Good luck mama!

Kelly , mama to 4yo and 1yo ,
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#37 of 44 Old 12-23-2008, 02:39 PM
 
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Stay at home, babies are only babies once in their lives, enjoy it!

Being able to stay at home with our kids have been a wonderful experience for me. I know we could be someplace else financially had I continued to work but the trade-off has been great.

If you want to/need to get out some and be with adults and earn a little extra go for a job that is flexable with their hours even if it means a drastic cut in pay.
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#38 of 44 Old 12-23-2008, 03:37 PM
 
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yeah, once you add in the going to school full-time it really seems like it wouldn't be possible to work those hrs anyway. I mean, you could if you had to but it would come at a cost.

IME, online classes can be more challenging and time consuming than their campus version. I struggled to take 2 classes at a time and take care of my child (just had one, then) I cannot imagine trying to work a full-time+ job as well and remain sane. JMO, though. good luck with your decision.

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#39 of 44 Old 12-23-2008, 04:10 PM
 
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Working those hours plus taking classes sounds to me like a recipe for failing a class. With that information, and since you can manage without your working, I would stay at home. Maybe take your mother up on her offer when it comes time to study for finals.
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#40 of 44 Old 12-23-2008, 10:15 PM
 
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I'd definitely stay home. (Heck, I AM staying home, and we aren't nearly as secure financially as it sounds like you are!)

I've never heard someone say that they regretted staying home with their kids when they were young. I've heard plenty of people say that they regretted working, and wished they had found a way to stay home. These first few years of your baby's life will go by so fast, and once they're gone... no going back!

Amanda , mama to my two boys: N (10/06) and : A (7/09)
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#41 of 44 Old 12-26-2008, 07:55 PM
 
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if i were you, i would stay home, especially if your lo is small. Dh and i had that talk last night, and we are in a massive amount of debt, w/o insurance and things are just not improving. We have both agreed since dh will be able to stay with ds 2 days during the work week, and since he is older (2 1/2) and no longer bf'ing, that me working is practically our only option for us to get out of debt. I know what you mean about the debt repayment. i have tried to convince dh that the fastest way to get out of debt would be for me to work the night shift, and ds goes w/o daycare, but he is not interested in my going out at late hours of the night working. So we will take things slower, but in all honesty, he said that he wanted me to work for just a year, which would pay off about 14000 of our 19000 cc/debt, but if things are going well and working out w/the job i find, i will more than likely stay for 2 to 2 1/2 years and finish up all our debt except mortgage. Good luck in your decision, it is hard to choose. I have delayed going to work as long as possible and i think that we are near the breaking point. As long as you are diligent with sticking to budget i think you shouldn't have any problems staying home on just your dh's income.

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#42 of 44 Old 12-26-2008, 09:05 PM
 
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I'd SAH for sure :
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#43 of 44 Old 12-26-2008, 09:54 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Crunchy*VT*Mom View Post
That is too much work.

Your mother would be raising your baby.

She got her chance when she had you, now its your turn.
No, the OP would still be raising her baby just as much as her partner is also raising their child, even though he works 2 jobs and goes to school. Mothers who have assistance caring for their children are STILL raising them.

But in the OPs case it is clear that she really wants to stay home and I encourage her to do so.

Third generation WOHM. I work by choice.
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#44 of 44 Old 12-26-2008, 10:01 PM
 
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No, the OP would still be raising her baby just as much as her partner is also raising their child, even though he works 2 jobs and goes to school. Mothers who have assistance caring for their children are STILL raising them.

But in the OPs case it is clear that she really wants to stay home and I encourage her to do so.
maybe neither parent would be raising the baby, then?

I mean, if you are with your child less than 1 waking hour a day, is that really raising him or her?
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