What are your weirdest money-saving tips? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 41 Old 04-17-2013, 04:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I know my habit of "shopping" from other people's trash on the curb is a bit weird but also obvious... what are some of your less-obvious weird or slightly embarrassing ways of saving money?

One of mine is shopping for clothes in the kids' section. I'm a smaller adult and can fit into L/XL stuff from the girls section for some basics (undergarments, plain shirts, socks, shoes...) and even the boy's section! Boys is cheapest, girls is next, women's clothes are 10x more expensive for some reason and I've even found the exact same items in all 3 departments!! Like silk long johns, for example. They were $44 in the women's section (size XS), $24 in the girls' section (size XL) and $14 in the boys' section (size L). Same brand/color/style!

Another is when we are out & about and want a treat, instead of paying $3-4+ each for an ice cream cone at the ice cream shop, we stop at a grocery store and get ice cream there instead. Sometimes we split a big container, other times we get the mini containers or ice cream bars, and it ends up being around $1 a person instead.

Would love to hear some of your obscure tips!

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#2 of 41 Old 04-17-2013, 04:20 PM
 
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I go thou the community recycling for mags, newpaper, and other reading materials. Also take any coupons I see. LOL

 

I have to think of anyothers.

 

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#3 of 41 Old 04-17-2013, 05:18 PM
 
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We do a lot of local foraging.  Our growing season is short but we have berries in the summer that are fairly plentiful and concord grape vines that all grow wild.  If you know where to look, there's lots of berries and grapes to be found.  It's free food!  Can't argue with that.

 

 

Also, bartering is great.  I'm watching a neighbor's guinea pig for the week while she and her daughter are on vacation.  I'm taking no money for it but I took the milk and eggs they didn't want to go bad while they were away.  I think that's a fair trade since she provided all the supplies, including the produce to feed him.  I also watch her daughter every day before school for a small amt of money and the privilege of using her garbage service(we have no garbage pick-up in our town and it costs $30 per family for services).  Saves me $30 a month and gives her cheaper childcare.  I have also traded my knitting services for yarn or a gym membership or food or lovely homemade soaps before.  You just can't be afraid to ask or propose a trade.  I've done trades for carpooling before with friends for our kids to save on gas, etc. 


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#4 of 41 Old 04-18-2013, 07:58 AM
 
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I guess this isn't weird, but we trade after-school care (snacks and homework at our houses), taking kids to activities after school, and taking the kids on half-days with another family. For a total of 6 kids in two families, it's free instead of $$$ and allows the two of us parents who are self-employed to have two longer work days per week.


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#5 of 41 Old 04-19-2013, 06:30 PM
 
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I also love he kid swap. I do it twice weekly plus extra as needed. Sure cheaper than finding part time toddler daycare. Or a sitter for dinner dates.

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#6 of 41 Old 04-21-2013, 10:05 AM
 
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I've been know to use my cell phone at the grocery store to tally up everything I put in my cart before check-out.  Really helps keep impulse purchases down and helps stay in budget.

 

We also do the ice cream thing..just buy a box of say Klondike bars or something at the grocery store.
 

The biggest money saving thing I do, is stay out of stores...grocery shop no more than once a week, avoid other stores etc.

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#7 of 41 Old 04-22-2013, 04:26 PM
 
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I wish we could share childcare..the only friend I trusted to let her watch my kids? Yeah, just found out her husband is a pedophile. She's not leaving him. Screw that noise, I trust no one. And it sucks. :(


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#8 of 41 Old 04-22-2013, 05:58 PM
 
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Originally Posted by micah_mae_ View Post

I wish we could share childcare..the only friend I trusted to let her watch my kids? Yeah, just found out her husband is a pedophile. She's not leaving him. Screw that noise, I trust no one. And it sucks. :(

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#9 of 41 Old 04-22-2013, 06:02 PM
 
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My thoughts exactly.


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#10 of 41 Old 04-23-2013, 09:24 AM
 
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Holy crap that's awful Micah_Mae!!!!!! greensad.gif OMG... Beyond words right now..
 


 

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#11 of 41 Old 04-23-2013, 01:34 PM
 
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Holy crap that's awful Micah_Mae!!!!!! greensad.gif OMG... Beyond words right now..
 

Yup. He took a picture up a girls skirt (without her knowledge, but the girl was about 4 and my friend was babysitting her) and kept it in his phone to "use" later.

 

Worst part? She's not going to tell the girls mom. Because "he didn't touch her, say anything to her or anything else". But what she didn't realize was that by saying that to me she was basically saying she wouldn't tell me either if it were my boys. 


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#12 of 41 Old 04-23-2013, 05:29 PM
 
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Omg Micah_mae! I don't know what to say! Please tell me they don't have kids
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#13 of 41 Old 04-23-2013, 05:29 PM
 
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Omg Micah_mae! I don't know what to say! Please tell me they don't have kids
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#14 of 41 Old 04-23-2013, 06:06 PM
 
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It's a messed up situation. :( They have a little boy who's 5 who they adopted through foster care. I guess she doesn't think her dh will actually do anything..I havent talked to her since she told me.


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#15 of 41 Old 04-23-2013, 08:05 PM
 
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DO you know the 4 year old girl and her parents?  If you do, have you told them?


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#16 of 41 Old 04-23-2013, 08:09 PM
 
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No I don't know them, if I did I would have told them. I don't think she watches her anymore though.

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#17 of 41 Old 04-24-2013, 10:05 PM
 
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I was reminded of this thread earlier though I didn't realize the discussion had turned to such a serious topic.

 

I count the number of sheets of toilet paper I use. It's probably more related to my OCD tendencies than frugality but it does keep the cost of TP down in a weird way.

 

crunchymommy: I also shop in the kids' section though I didn't realize there was a price difference between girls and boys, I'll have to look into that!


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#18 of 41 Old 04-24-2013, 11:04 PM
 
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Our city has a lot of swaps around town. Mostly clothes but also stuff swaps in the spring. I clean out the clutter I don't need and get the things I do. No money changes hands.
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#19 of 41 Old 04-25-2013, 01:50 AM
 
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Ok pregnant brain strikes again! Philomom, I read your post and thought "how do swamps help you get stuff you need?!" I had to reread a couple of times to get "swaps" lol.
Anyway my thing is that with a 2 year old I'm simply too busy/tired to be the recreational shopper I used to be. I was never a huge spender and often wouldn't buy anything but staying out of the stores means I definitely don't spend the money.
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#20 of 41 Old 04-25-2013, 07:54 AM
 
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One of mine is shopping for clothes in the kids' section.

 

I know a couple of people that do this, especially for shoes.


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#21 of 41 Old 04-25-2013, 08:12 AM
 
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Micah_mae, did you consider that maybe your friend doesn't have the strength to turn her husband in to the authorities, but by telling you, she is hoping you will do it for her? You might be the only person standing between the pedophile and his nextt victim. Think about why you posted these details on this discussion board--are you wondering whether others would turn him in? What if he goes on to molest someone in an even worse way? Perhaps he already has. This is very abnormal and sick behavior, as you know. The authorities are the ones to find the little girl and make sure she is safe and that her parents know what happened.
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#22 of 41 Old 04-25-2013, 08:40 AM
 
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It's a messed up situation. :( They have a little boy who's 5 who they adopted through foster care. I guess she doesn't think her dh will actually do anything..I havent talked to her since she told me.

 

That's beyond messed up. Wow. I'm horrified for that little girl, their foster son who has no choice but to be there and the fact that your boys have spent time there.

 

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Micah_mae, did you consider that maybe your friend doesn't have the strength to turn her husband in to the authorities, but by telling you, she is hoping you will do it for her? You might be the only person standing between the pedophile and his nextt victim. Think about why you posted these details on this discussion board--are you wondering whether others would turn him in? What if he goes on to molest someone in an even worse way? Perhaps he already has. This is very abnormal and sick behavior, as you know. The authorities are the ones to find the little girl and make sure she is safe and that her parents know what happened.

 

Good point. Personally, I would dob the husband in. This stuff is how life long nightmares begin for some people. I think I'm going to cry! :((((


 

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#23 of 41 Old 04-25-2013, 12:50 PM
 
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Micah_mae, did you consider that maybe your friend doesn't have the strength to turn her husband in to the authorities, but by telling you, she is hoping you will do it for her? You might be the only person standing between the pedophile and his nextt victim. Think about why you posted these details on this discussion board--are you wondering whether others would turn him in? What if he goes on to molest someone in an even worse way? Perhaps he already has. This is very abnormal and sick behavior, as you know. The authorities are the ones to find the little girl and make sure she is safe and that her parents know what happened.

You know I was thinking yesterday about why I accidentally hijacked this thread about this. I think I was just seeking input from others because I feel overwhelmed with the situation. I haven't talked to her in over a month.

I don't think that he has done anything to be turned in for (as in, I don't think he has anything that could be considered evidence). I'm sure he's keeping his phone clean since she saw the pictures. Also the pictures were all from across the room, like he walked in on her in a provocative position (innocently of course) and took pics on his way through the living room. He's never been alone with any of her babysitting kids (according to her) and now he's not allowed in the house while she's babysitting (according to her). In my heart I don't think he has molested anyone, but I think he is headed in that direction.

He had a porn problem, now apparently going towards kiddie porn, what's next?

I know she told one other person who I think might be a mandatory reporter. I don't know what's going on since I haven't talked to her in so long.


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#24 of 41 Old 04-25-2013, 12:52 PM
 
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That's beyond messed up. Wow. I'm horrified for that little girl, their foster son who has no choice but to be there and the fact that your boys have spent time there.

 

 

Good point. Personally, I would dob the husband in. This stuff is how life long nightmares begin for some people. I think I'm going to cry! :((((

I'm hoping that my son's autism would make it obvious if something weird happened (he wouldn't listen if someone told him not to tell someone) and he hasn't had any weird behaviors or anything so I don't think anything happened while they were there.

I'm mostly concerned about their son..and what it would take for her to leave him.


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#25 of 41 Old 04-25-2013, 02:14 PM
 
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It is a very difficult position you are in, micah_mae_. There are many unnknowns in this situation, such as, what has he perhaps done that he didn't tell his wife about, has he ever left his fingerprints at a crime scene, has he ever been suspected in pedophile crimes before, etc. It is good you are able to have some mother's intuition when it comes to your own son. Of course there is no guarantee what would happen if you report to the police and/or cps. At least however, someone may then at least be aware and have him on their radar. Also, deleted images are often still retrievable, but this sometimes depends on how much time elapses between deletion and retrieval. If he is into child porn, don't you think he would have put the image somewhere "safe" where his wife wouldn't find it...like another computer? Anyway, it's not really your job to worry about all these details, but reporting it would get it off your plate, and the authorities would follow up. Who's to say your friend won't watch this girl again--it's the authorities' job to find out who she is, and talk with her and/or the parents. Your friend may or may not leave her husband. There is probably much going on in the relationship you won't ever know about, but she saw fit to give you a small taste, perhaps for some small measure of understanding.
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#26 of 41 Old 04-26-2013, 07:59 AM
 
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I'm hoping that my son's autism would make it obvious if something weird happened (he wouldn't listen if someone told him not to tell someone) and he hasn't had any weird behaviors or anything so I don't think anything happened while they were there.

I'm mostly concerned about their son..and what it would take for her to leave him.

 

Here is the bottom line. You are an adult and at this point you have knowledge that could protect children that can not protect themselves. It doesn't matter if you are mandated by law or not.
You are working this through your mind and making excuses. There is NO excuse. You can help stop the cycle of abuse.

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#27 of 41 Old 04-29-2013, 07:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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bigeyes.gif Wow I had no idea the direction this thread would take!!! Micah_mae, please, please report it. It's not your job to worry about details or evidence. Let the authorities investigate. There may be nothing they can do but at least he'll be on the radar... and like the pp said, there may be things in his background that you don't know about that would make this more incriminating. You have a huge responsibility here to do something with this knowledge, I know you didn't ask to be in this position but you are, and you have the ability to protect a child or multiple children. Please don't turn your back or hide your head in the sand... I believe you can make anonymous reports if you're not comfortable with her knowing your reported her DH. But even so... if she didn't want anyone to know, she shouldn't have told anyone, and since she told you, you do NOT owe her any kind of privacy or secrecy around this. The child is way more important here. What makes you hesitant to report him? Please consider it... please... I feel like I'm begging and I guess I am.
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Ok pregnant brain strikes again! Philomom, I read your post and thought "how do swamps help you get stuff you need?!" I had to reread a couple of times to get "swaps" lol.
Not sure there's much point to staying on topic now but just have to say that my DS calls swaps "swamps" lol. Pretty funny when he talks about how he "got these pants from the swamp." lol.gif

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#28 of 41 Old 05-12-2013, 09:34 PM
 
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yes, this is not what i was planning to read on such a thread. Micah_mae please call the cps on this man. The reason children get abused is often because people ignore the warning signs and cries for help (i too think that your friend told you for a reason) People call cps on others ALL the time. Sometimes just out of spite. This is a legitamate reason for them to step in. I personally would dig deeper and find out the parents names and inform them. If it were my child being put in that position and an adult or more than one just ignored these WARNING signs I would be devastated.  How would you feel if the tables were turned and that girls parents knew your friends dh was taking suggestive photos of your lo's and they shrugged it off and ignored it? If your friend won't be a voice for the girl, you should be her voice.

 

Also you have no idea and neither does your friend on the extent of her dh's addictions. Computer files can be recovered, passwords etc. That is up to the police/cps. The first step is to make that call...

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#29 of 41 Old 05-16-2013, 08:59 PM
 
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He hasn't committed a crime? Taking pictures of children like that IS A CRIME. And it isn't your job to make sure there's evidence. That's why my tax dollars pay cop salaries. And furthermore, pedophiles keep stuff like that; they can't help themselves. PERIOD. But, by all means continue this passive stance, but call it by it's legal name: hindering investigation of a crime and/or aiding and abetting.

Sorry to be so blunt, but it's not like "ooops, someone was littering/j-walking". We are talking about someone who likely is or will become a predator in a house that plays host to a caregiver, ie, easy prey.
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#30 of 41 Old 05-17-2013, 12:07 AM
 
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I'm hoping that my son's autism would make it obvious if something weird happened (he wouldn't listen if someone told him not to tell someone) and he hasn't had any weird behaviors or anything so I don't think anything happened while they were there.

 

Please, I'm begging you mama, report him. Fact is, you CAN'T guarantee he hasn't touched your little boy, can you? Let's be honest here. Even though you can rationalize it in your head ("but he was only there for one hour" "but my son would tell me if this happened" etc), you still cannot guarantee it. I don't like scare tactics, but maybe the realization that your son could also be a victim, might prompt you to take action. There is one thing you can guarantee though - By reporting him you are helping to protect other little boys and girls from this filthy bastard.


 

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