Frugality Exhausted - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#31 of 44 Old 02-03-2014, 07:53 PM
 
Jaxy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 508
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by greenkri View Post
 

Relying on assistance is stressful in its own way, because it could go away.

Just got our foodstamps cut off AGAIN (they cut us off BY MISTAKE last summer, we were out for 3 months, we used all the little savings we had...)

So last month waited a few weeks before we could go grocery shopping, there I was at the save a lot this morning, so happy to finally buy cheese, butter, chicken... and the card was declined.... I had money with me but it was for the electric bill... It's gonna have to wait!

I can't believe they would just cut us off without even a letter or a phone call...

 

I also work in retail, am a manager and work my butt off, but barely make more than minimum wage... And I get to sell crappy expensive things to people all day long, smiling at them wondering if I'll ever be able to walk in a store and actually make a purchase that I did not budget for.

 

We don't have a car, cable, insurance, most of our furniture was found on the curb, we live next to drug dealers in the ghetto... Needless to say that we never go out... I do spend way too much on food, often go to the coop and actually buy some stuff organic because I'm a nutrition freak and don't want my ginger coming from China... But that's my only splurge... I know I could be more frugal but between working 4 days a week, cleaning, cooking, at the end of the day I am left exhausted and all I want to do is relax for an hour, watching TV or complaining on this forum for instance lol. Most of the time I'm OK with our situation but tonight it just feels...welll... exhausting...


French Canadian living in the Big Easy. Happy mama to Jaxson Lee born on 9/16/12 and loving wife to Denis Lee since 11/03/11

Lovesbikenew.giftreehugger.gifwhistling.gifnamaste.gifteapot2.GIFread.gifdishes.gifchampagne.gifeat.gifcoolshine.gifROTFLMAO.gifnotes.gifjog.gifbroc1.gifstillheart.gifbiggrinbounce.gifRainbow.gifcaffix.gifand all that good stuff

Jaxy is offline  
#32 of 44 Old 02-04-2014, 07:30 AM
 
frugalmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,135
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 6 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaxy View Post
 

Just got our foodstamps cut off AGAIN (they cut us off BY MISTAKE last summer, we were out for 3 months, we used all the little savings we had...)

So last month waited a few weeks before we could go grocery shopping, there I was at the save a lot this morning, so happy to finally buy cheese, butter, chicken... and the card was declined.... I had money with me but it was for the electric bill... It's gonna have to wait!

I can't believe they would just cut us off without even a letter or a phone call...

 

*snip*

Jaxy, if / when that happens again - CALL YOUR STATE DHS/HHSC OMBUDSMAN. They can normally get it fixed in 2-3 weeks. While it's getting fixed - if possible go to the food pantry. Here if you go & state your reason for going is because your benefits are delayed, the main food bank {which also processes foodstamps apps} looks in to your case & sometimes they can get things fixed.

 

 

And yes, I am so tired of being broke. My house is falling apart & needs major work but there is no way I can afford it anytime soon. I'm just thankful we have a home that mostly works. I'm busting my bum this month trying by some miracle to make enough to cover the property taxes that are now late. I can't set up a payment plan on them as I don't have a regular income.

 

I'm stuck in that catch-22 of too sick to work a regular job, but not sick enough to qualify for SSI. So instead I work small odd jobs, sell on ebay, etc. I've been so broke that I've even considered panhandling {but I was worried I'd get a ticket & not be able to pay that}. If it weren't for food stamps & medicaid we'd never make it. I am sick & tired of spending HOURS on hold or robo-dialing agencies to try to get help with our electric bill or water bill. And my safelink phone never gives enough minutes for doing that either.

 

I am tired of my house not having good heat, or any a/c in the summer.

 

I am sick of having to use the bus to get around. And not being able to go where I want because the bus doesn't run there.

 

I am sick of having to tell my dd no all the time because we can't afford it. Even on little things like a $5 toy. Or a carnival ride.


Me, 29, Muslim hijab.gif single mama to T age 7 energy.gif We homeschool.gif saynovax.giffambedsingle1.gif and Love it!
frugalmama is offline  
#33 of 44 Old 02-05-2014, 04:30 AM
 
justmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: beginning anew
Posts: 5,814
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 12 Post(s)
.

treehugger.gifjog.gifgreenthumb.gifknit.gifnamaste.gif

justmama is online now  
#34 of 44 Old 02-07-2014, 07:05 AM - Thread Starter
 
wildmonkeys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Metro DC
Posts: 1,639
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Okay, so this seems like the correct thread for this :) Something that specifically is getting to me is home improvements and renovations. The house I live in was built in 1988.  The basement is unfinished, the kitchen leaves a lot to be desired, etc.  We STRECTCHED to get in this house and aren't making any improvements (except the cheap ones we can do ourselves like paint) Most of my friends and neighbors are having high end kitchen redos, new roofs, new furnaces, bathroom redos....my good friend is having her finished basement refinished because she doesn't like the current layout!!!!!

 

I keep wondering how in the world they can afford all of that???

 

And it makes me struggle with being grateful enough for our home which I know we are actually quite lucky to have.

wildmonkeys is offline  
#35 of 44 Old 02-08-2014, 02:43 PM
 
justmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: beginning anew
Posts: 5,814
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 12 Post(s)

I just spend my security deposit from my old house on a new mattress and boxspring for myself.  My first ever that wasn't super old and used.  Made me pretty sick to my stomach to blow $600 on a bed.  But I've reali*ed lately that all my pots and pans are scratched and warped and old.  My couch was used when I got it and it's 10 years since I've had it and it's ripped and beat up.  My bed was older than me.  I have just basically reali*ed that everything I own is broken or falling apart or duct taped back together and I'm sick of it.  All my knives were ancient so I splurged on a cute polka dotted orange knife to replace all the old ones.  I just hate that I don't have anything nice.  It's really hard to be careful and clever with my money all the time and not spend on replacing any of the broken and beat up stuff.


treehugger.gifjog.gifgreenthumb.gifknit.gifnamaste.gif

justmama is online now  
#36 of 44 Old 02-08-2014, 06:12 PM
 
kitchensqueen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Elk Grove Village, IL
Posts: 3,345
Mentioned: 16 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 57 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by justmama View Post
 

I just spend my security deposit from my old house on a new mattress and boxspring for myself.  My first ever that wasn't super old and used.  Made me pretty sick to my stomach to blow $600 on a bed.  But I've reali*ed lately that all my pots and pans are scratched and warped and old.  My couch was used when I got it and it's 10 years since I've had it and it's ripped and beat up.  My bed was older than me.  I have just basically reali*ed that everything I own is broken or falling apart or duct taped back together and I'm sick of it.  All my knives were ancient so I splurged on a cute polka dotted orange knife to replace all the old ones.  I just hate that I don't have anything nice.  It's really hard to be careful and clever with my money all the time and not spend on replacing any of the broken and beat up stuff.

 

I think a bed is a necessity - you need to be able to get a good night's sleep in order to live your life and provide for your family. And $600 for both a box spring and mattress is a good price! You can't touch a decent set around here for under $1,000. 

 

Have you tried couponing and shopping the clearance deals? It's made such a big difference in our budget since I started shopping that way seriously about a year ago. Just today I picked up $50 worth of stuff for $15 at Target - and while I was there I saw some cute kitchen knifes, kitchen towels and cookware on clearance - much of it up to 70% off!

A&A likes this.

Apartment Farm - the chronicles of my cooking, gardening, crafting and other such things. 

 

kitchensqueen is online now  
#37 of 44 Old 02-08-2014, 07:19 PM
 
baileyb's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,327
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
We are at the point where all of our hand me downs and used stuff (which is everything) is just done, no longer worth having. I spent all of January feeling guilty about every purchase I made to the point of depression. Now I am trying to let it go and just replace things with quality as best I can and then get back on track with our $ when we can. At some point we just have to cry mercy and get the stuff we need that is going to last.

belly.gif1***5****10****15****20****25****30****35heartbeat.gif***40babygirl.gif

 

baileyb is offline  
#38 of 44 Old 02-09-2014, 10:15 AM
 
mamarhu's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: dining at the restaurant at the end of the universe
Posts: 3,065
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 9 Post(s)

I am with you on the crappy furniture thing. About 9 months ago, I had to hire a guy to make a dump run. I decided to make the trip worthwhile, and had him take ALL the bad furniture. My couch had been nice 15 years ago, but it smelled like pee (long story involving a foster child), and a puppy had eaten a substantial portion of the cushions. Two mattress sets (torn and stained) went, along with 3 dining room chairs missing slats in the seats, all the broken blinds in the house, a huge 1985 TV that took up 1/2 the tiny living room, and several small tables that were wobbly beyond repair. Oh, and the dresser from my bedroom with drawers that either stuck or fell out whenever you tried to open them. Anyway, we were down to nearly an unfurnished house. `One at a time, we have replaced most of these items. Both kids were sleeping on the floor, and I was on a plain mattress, so beds were first priority. Yay Craigslist!!! Then we found a great couch at a thrift store, 2 chairs free on the sidewalk, and gradually filled up the house again. I still need a dresser, but Oh, well. We made new drapes for the living room and dining room, and thumb-tacked up fabric in one room, but the bedrooms could still use real curtains. I am pretty much satisfied with what we have now. It took that serious purge to get me to replace anything. And it was a little weird coming into an empty living room for a while. But it worked out well for us.


Rhu - mother,grandmother,daughter,sister,friend-foster,adoptive,and biological;not necessarily in that order. Some of it's magic, some of it's tragic, but I had a good life all the way (Jimmy Buffet)

mamarhu is online now  
#39 of 44 Old 02-09-2014, 02:31 PM
 
kitchensqueen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Elk Grove Village, IL
Posts: 3,345
Mentioned: 16 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 57 Post(s)

Mamarhu, that's exactly the spirit! You can have nice things even if they're second-hand, or DIY. I think it's ridiculous to spend a ton of money on stuff even if you do have it. Just the other day on Pinterest I saw a cheapie DIY curtain rod made with a wooden dowel and drawer pulls - a four foot wooden dowel costs about $1.75, and a pair of drawer knobs cost $2.00 for the plain ones - but even the fancy ones are only $4-5 apiece. Simple curtain rod brackets are about $5. So you can have a nice curtain rod for $20 - a fraction of of the price of an off-the-shelf version. All kinds of things can be created - and if you get into it, it also becomes a hobby, rather than a chore or a depressing moment. I've been there though - the hardest part is getting to the point where you can see the good in the challenge, instead of letting it wear you down and beat you.


Apartment Farm - the chronicles of my cooking, gardening, crafting and other such things. 

 

kitchensqueen is online now  
#40 of 44 Old 02-09-2014, 03:34 PM
 
happyhats's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,214
Mentioned: 3 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 16 Post(s)
Im trying to replace my living room furniture myself. I seem to have bad luck on couches/loveseats. Etc. I dont seem to know how to pick out a low cost piece that isnt crap quality. Hopefully I will learn eventually!
happyhats is online now  
#41 of 44 Old 02-09-2014, 03:59 PM
 
kitchensqueen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Elk Grove Village, IL
Posts: 3,345
Mentioned: 16 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 57 Post(s)

This article on how to assess second-hand furniture might be of interest. :-) 


Apartment Farm - the chronicles of my cooking, gardening, crafting and other such things. 

 

kitchensqueen is online now  
#42 of 44 Old 02-09-2014, 06:06 PM
 
happyhats's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 1,214
Mentioned: 3 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 16 Post(s)
Thanks!
happyhats is online now  
#43 of 44 Old 02-11-2014, 08:56 PM
 
starsmagick's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Chicago
Posts: 139
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I sympathize.  And I'm so frustrated - my husband had what he thought was a decent freelance gig fixing computers.  We get the check, and then the darn "company" tells us oh, wire half the money to so and so...Yea, we took the check to the bank to verify it cause now this sounded fishy...and the check's fraudulent.  Really?  We bust our butts to get our heads above water, and it feels like we're getting punished for trying to work hard.  I guess i'm just glad we realized it was a scam before we cashed the check and ended up really screwed.

starsmagick is offline  
#44 of 44 Old 02-12-2014, 05:22 AM
 
Poddi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: BC, Canada
Posts: 1,927
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by starsmagick View Post
 

I sympathize.  And I'm so frustrated - my husband had what he thought was a decent freelance gig fixing computers.  We get the check, and then the darn "company" tells us oh, wire half the money to so and so...Yea, we took the check to the bank to verify it cause now this sounded fishy...and the check's fraudulent.  Really?  We bust our butts to get our heads above water, and it feels like we're getting punished for trying to work hard.  I guess i'm just glad we realized it was a scam before we cashed the check and ended up really screwed.


Good for you!  Don't feel too bad, these scams are everywhere, or seem to be because each scammer send out thousands of email.  My parents nearly got tricked once trying to rent out their vacation property.  They weren't very experienced with online stuff.  They got lucky because two scammers contacted them at the same time, both saying they're getting married and would like to rent that place for honeymoon, and, their company is paying for their honeymoon. :lol  They got suspicious and didn't go through with it.  Whoever heard of companies pay for people's honeymoon? 

 

Anyway it's great that you recognized the scam. 


Mom to 2 beautiful autistic boys (12 & 11)  
Poddi is offline  
Reply

Tags
Frugality , Finances

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off