December Lower Income and/or Struggling Mama's Support Thread - Page 17 - Mothering Forums

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#481 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Crunchy Doula View Post
Things I'm REALLY thankful tonight!

1. So our account was overdrafted at the beginning of this month, for $200. It shouldn't have. I keep track to the T about money, and my bank put some mysterious holds that they can't seem to explain to me what they were for and I still can't seem to get any answers. So because of the holds it overdrafted my account. There was plenty of money that it shouldn't have, but with the hold it did. There were only a couple amounts that put it over, all of the like $1 charges, but with that a $28 fee, so it skyrocketed! So, I was negative $200 and now I am being charged $10 a day because of it. Well there was no way in hell we were going to be able to pay for it till Christmas day when my settlement came it. Well we asked DH's parents if they would be willing to help us out and we would pay them back ont he 26th or postdate them a check. So DH went over there tonight and they gave him the money and told him we don't have to pay them back, that it was an early Chrismas present! You don't know how happy I am!!! They have always been very genoerous with us when we needed help, like with dd's carseat! I am just so relieved that I can't even tell them!!!

2. My DH is such an amazing father!

3. That I have so many people that care for us!

If yu really believe it had nothing to do with you, go down in person and ask to speak to a manager. If they can't tell you what the holds are tell them you are very worried about fraud.


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#482 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:02 PM
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JustMama~~

I didn't pay my electric bill for FOUR MONTHS. And just now got a disconnect notice.

It depends on how much your bill is though, we have gas heat so elec isn't much. In Arizona, our a/c was so ridiculous, we only made it two months before getting a disconnect notice.

They'll send you something in the mail saying, "we hate to intrude, but did you maybe forget to pay your bill?"

Then a couple of weeks later they'll send you a "please pay by this date or you will be served with a disconnect notice."

Then they'll come and stick a thing on your door giving you 24-48 hrs to get it paid. If you wait to pay it then, you'll get a confirmation number and have to call the shut-off people directly with your confirmation number to make sure it doesn't get disconnected.

Can you tell I've done this a few times?

I'd pay the property taxes, for sure. Paying an elec bill late for a month or two won't adversely affect your credit too much - you're planning on paying it up relatively soon anyway.

Oh, if it does get disconnected, there will be a re-activation charge added to your account. That sucks.
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#483 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:03 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by canadiannancy View Post
I am jumping in again, haven't been by this thread in a few months...been too depressed.

I am Nancy 26y Mom to a 2.5y baby girl a 15month old baby girl and brand new baby girl and wife to DH Michael.

I am going to go over and read the thread to catch up.. I need to get out of my rut...and now is as good a time as any.dizzy:


LIST SIZES YOU NEED AND EVERYONE WILL SEE WHAT THEY HAVE!

Good plan to focus on yourself first. Just like when they tell you to put the oxygen on you first on the airplane!
You have NO control of a depressed spouse and anything they do is not your fault.


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#484 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by amydidit View Post
I don't know why this hit me tonight. But I'm feeling really bummed right now.

Last year after we got our tax return we started talking about taking a vacation this year with ours back to Connecticut so I could show my family where I grew up. I really really wanted to do it. But as the year went on finances got tighter and I know that now we're just holding on as tight as we can until we get our tax return so we can finally pay our bills and get caught up. So, no vacation. I've known it for a while now, but tonight it's really hit me. I want SO much to go home. See where I grew up... what's changed, what hasn't. I feel like I *need* it. I feel so lost all the time, I feel like going home would offer a bit of grounding for me. Even though I didn't have a good childhood it's still where I lived most of my life. Through the goods and the bads. It was my youth.

I don't know when or if I'll ever get to go back





I had to wait 19 years before I got to go back to mine.

Yes it sucks if you can't go this year, but that does not mean you won't next year.

If you tell yourself you never will... then you NEVER will!


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#485 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:06 PM
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Oh, and I forgot I was going to say:


Anyone on THIS thread need some lil girl clothing, sz 2T-3T? I have random things, some are winter clothes and some are a little more spring-y - but I have lots. Really. I keep on meaning to take them to the consignment shop but never get around to it, and honestly our consignment shop is so ridiculously picky about style and such that they might not take most of it. It's in good shape, but not perfect, you know?

Anyway, let me know, I figured if I'm going thru the HH thread looking for people to send it to, I can go through the mamas on this thread at the same time!!
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#486 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:08 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Mom of 4 Sweeties View Post
Wanted to post my gratitudes for today:

1. Amazing kids! For all his "teenageness", my 15 yo is a great kid and a huge help,and the littles just brighten my day!
2. Hardworking DH. Though he doesn't get NEARLY the financial compensation I think he should and that we could REALLY use, he loves what he does, is good at it, and works really hard.
3. My homeschool co-op group and my MOPS group - dear friends who have provided, over the last 3 years, amazing amounts of love and support. I saw my MOPS friends Wednesday, and our Co-op meets today - Thank goodness! I need the hugs and happy faces.

Have a good day, everyone, and know you are all in my thoughts and prayers!

There are several homeschoolers/unshoolers in the group (including me ) , and I also have a soon to be 15 yo ds.

Nice to meet you!

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#487 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by happyhippiemama View Post
JustMama~~

I didn't pay my electric bill for FOUR MONTHS. And just now got a disconnect notice.

It depends on how much your bill is though, we have gas heat so elec isn't much. In Arizona, our a/c was so ridiculous, we only made it two months before getting a disconnect notice.

They'll send you something in the mail saying, "we hate to intrude, but did you maybe forget to pay your bill?"

Then a couple of weeks later they'll send you a "please pay by this date or you will be served with a disconnect notice."

Then they'll come and stick a thing on your door giving you 24-48 hrs to get it paid. If you wait to pay it then, you'll get a confirmation number and have to call the shut-off people directly with your confirmation number to make sure it doesn't get disconnected.

Can you tell I've done this a few times?

I'd pay the property taxes, for sure. Paying an elec bill late for a month or two won't adversely affect your credit too much - you're planning on paying it up relatively soon anyway.

Oh, if it does get disconnected, there will be a re-activation charge added to your account. That sucks.
Apparently you HAVE done that a few times. I have gas heat too and it was $80 this past month: which is ridiculous because I'm a nazi about keeping it at 60 overnight and 64 during the day. I cannot imagine WHY it was that bad other than high gas costs. Last year we could keep the heat at 68 for that amt of money.:

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#488 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:09 PM
 
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Originally Posted by happyhippiemama View Post
Oh, and I forgot I was going to say:


Anyone on THIS thread need some lil girl clothing, sz 2T-3T? I have random things, some are winter clothes and some are a little more spring-y - but I have lots. Really. I keep on meaning to take them to the consignment shop but never get around to it, and honestly our consignment shop is so ridiculously picky about style and such that they might not take most of it. It's in good shape, but not perfect, you know?

Anyway, let me know, I figured if I'm going thru the HH thread looking for people to send it to, I can go through the mamas on this thread at the same time!!
I think our newest mama, canadiannancy needs some in that size.

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#489 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by ediesmom View Post
i have natural immunity to the mumps

and i am feeling SOOOOO good about it

going to student health services to stuff my documentation up someones butt.........and to challenge their policy to let part-time students continue with classes even without 'proper' documentation:

well, better day



Wish I could be there for that "party". LOL

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#490 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That impacts your credit pretty bad huh? As bad as defaulting on a car payment a few times or as bad as missing rent??? Just curious because we won't be able to make ALL the bills in Jan and Feb and March and I'm just trying to figure out which is the least horrible to miss that month.:


So tonight I get a short shift at work which FEELS nice but it's not a lot of money and we were super dead last night at work and I only made $55 in tips so that's not good. .

Call and tell them all NOW before you are late that you will be late and it can "save" your credit.

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#491 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by ~*Jaime View Post
Well, it took two days and two cars but I am finally home I am so happy! My car is still at my work, but who cares, I don't want to deive in this mess anyway





Sorry to hear about your situation




Sounds like you are going to get a lot of clothing help from the Mamas here. Aren't they awesome? Please keep posting, this thread really helps!




Glad to hear you made it home safe!

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#492 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by vannienicole View Post

Grateful list:

1. Kicking butt on 2/5 finals. 3 left to go and a few papers due by next Friday. I can do this!
2. Insurance. When money issues strike, I am so incredibly grateful that we at least have that.
3. DH's study job. The military isn't ideal (as we are against the war and most everything that the current administration stands for), but at least I don't have to worry about DH losing his job right now.
4. Student loans come in in January. Money for daycare!
5. Today is the last day of daycare for the semester. DH is taking a couple days off to watch the kids instead of me having to scramble (my provider is going out of town next week . I can't wait to spend some time with my DD. She needs some extra mommy time lately.
6. Awesome students in my classes. There are a few that know my situation, want to study with me and are willing to work around my : schedule.
7. Still grateful for DH's grandmas Christmas present of $400.
8. That we are going to visit the IL's for two weeks during Christmas break. This means that the heat will (ideally) be used less as my sis is the only one left at the house.
9. Dec. 22nd. Dieselboy at the Lizard Lounge in Dallas and my MIL said she would watch both DD and DS so we could go!! It's been forever since I have gone to see a DJ. Only $10 if tickets are bought early. See number 7!!!
10. The wonderful families who provided Christmas presents for us for the kids and the beautiful families we get to provide for due to #7. Happy Holidays to all the struggling families out there. May you enjoy, even through our struggles, at least one day of peace for the month .


Wooohooo on the bits of good luck!!!! Have a great time!!!!!

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#493 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm sorry I haven't been able to keep up with this thread. It's just SO fast and big! I've tried reading through though and I'm offering lots of {{{hugs}}} and prayers and good thoughts to everyone who needs/wants them.

Well I'm on Kizoodle but so far no one has bought what I'm *selling*. I'm going to try putting something else on today and see what happens. I really want to get *buying*.

Today is my day off. Had a doctor's appointment. It went well. I'm always so nervous at doctors offices. She upped my klonopin so I can take it twice a day if I feel I need it. I should've thought about it and taken on before I went for my appointment. I bet I would've been a lot less jittery.

Anyway... not much really going on. My wedding anniversary is next week. We can't afford to do anything for it but the IL's have agreed to watch the kids this Saturday night so we can at least have some alone time.

That's about it.


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#494 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:18 PM
 
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Call and tell them all NOW before you are late that you will be late and it can "save" your credit.

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Oh I didn't even think of that. Thanks Thystle. You are so stinkin' helpful all the time! I you!

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#495 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Satori View Post
***************************************
What exactly happens if you don't pay your electric bill on time? I have a choice between paying my personal property taxes on time or paying my electric bill on time. I've never been late on either in my life, so I don't which to pay. Will they shut my electric off right away or just charge a late fee? I know the late fee for the property taxes is outrageous. I won't have money to catch up until our financial aid money comes in sometime in February.

Pay the property taxes, utilities usually don't get shut off until your like 60-90 days late and they give you warnings before hand.[/QUOTE]


Call them all and let them know before it happens, and they might let you put it off.


Pay the thing that keeps you from being homeless.

Pay the thing that keeps you fed.

Pay the thing that keeps you warm.



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#496 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Welcome and {{{{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}} to the new moms, anyone I missed and our lurkers!

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#497 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:27 PM
 
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You might want to look into your state. Some states have laws against cutting off heat if you have little children. I know Oregon they cannot turn it off if you have small children. My friend went through that when she lost her job.

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#498 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:40 PM
 
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I just wanted to pop on and say hello...I'll be back and properly introduce myself in a bit.....I need to find something for dd for lunch and the baby wants to eat....she's fussin her next to me and even though I had NAK down pat with dd1 by 3mo, this time, not so much...

I did see a what are you greatful for here and there in the thread (haven't read it all) and right now I am greatful that my girls are healthy and happy and that our neighbor lets us split her wireless bill with her so we can have internet...win win bc she is a single mama and that $15/mo helps her out too....I am sure I am happy about more....just hard right now with my mother being ill (need to update that thread but it's in my siggy) and Christmas looming so big.....
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#499 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Clothes... if we can't help:


Some food banks also have a clothing bank.

Ask at WIC

Salvation Army

"Clothing Banks" googled or looked up in phone book

Catholic Charities

Many churches will have clothing banks





Ask around about clothing banks or thrift store "vouchers".






Maybe it might help someone.

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#500 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 01:53 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I just wanted to pop on and say hello...I'll be back and properly introduce myself in a bit.....I need to find something for dd for lunch and the baby wants to eat....she's fussin her next to me and even though I had NAK down pat with dd1 by 3mo, this time, not so much...

I did see a what are you greatful for here and there in the thread (haven't read it all) and right now I am greatful that my girls are healthy and happy and that our neighbor lets us split her wireless bill with her so we can have internet...win win bc she is a single mama and that $15/mo helps her out too....I am sure I am happy about more....just hard right now with my mother being ill (need to update that thread but it's in my siggy) and Christmas looming so big.....

Welcome to the "fold".

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#501 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 02:02 PM
 
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i have natural immunity to the mumps

and i am feeling SOOOOO good about it

going to student health services to stuff my documentation up someones butt.........and to challenge their policy to let part-time students continue with classes even without 'proper' documentation:

well, better day
Yay! I am so glad for you!!!

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#502 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 02:04 PM
 
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Anyone have any ideas on what I can do in this situation????

My husband moved out 4 months ago. My car loan and registration is in his name. His truck loan and registration is in my name. That's just how it worked out oddly enough due to financial circumstances at the times we bought them. So we each pay our own and register our own without issue and plan on separating them next year when he comes back from deployment to Kuwait and we do the whole divorce thing legally. But it's just too much to handle right now with the baby coming in 2 months and him deploying 3 months after that. He missed a month's payment on his truck a few months back and has paid every month since. But his loan company calls my cell phone up to 5 t imes a day between the hours of 8am and 9pm to harass me about it. I stopped answering my phone. I told them to f off several times. Nothing is working. They keep bugging me about that money. I know he's paying monthly. So is there a way to get this people off my back????? It's his loan but it's in my name so of course I"m responsible but without taking my name off the registration AND loan, I can't see a way out. HELP ME! Please tell me there's a miracle solution or law that I can threaten with.

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#503 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 02:15 PM
 
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You might want to look into your state. Some states have laws against cutting off heat if you have little children. I know Oregon they cannot turn it off if you have small children. My friend went through that when she lost her job.
that was my parents only saving grace- the gas company came a few time when they were gone but i had my daughter in their home and i would answer the door and they just said oh is so and so home. no well tell them we came by. - okay. byes.
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#504 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 02:35 PM
 
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yeah in my state they will NOT shut off your heat if your child is under a year. too bad I have a nearly 3 year old and a 7 year old.:

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#505 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 03:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Anyone have any ideas on what I can do in this situation????

My husband moved out 4 months ago. My car loan and registration is in his name. His truck loan and registration is in my name. That's just how it worked out oddly enough due to financial circumstances at the times we bought them. So we each pay our own and register our own without issue and plan on separating them next year when he comes back from deployment to Kuwait and we do the whole divorce thing legally. But it's just too much to handle right now with the baby coming in 2 months and him deploying 3 months after that. He missed a month's payment on his truck a few months back and has paid every month since. But his loan company calls my cell phone up to 5 t imes a day between the hours of 8am and 9pm to harass me about it. I stopped answering my phone. I told them to f off several times. Nothing is working. They keep bugging me about that money. I know he's paying monthly. So is there a way to get this people off my back????? It's his loan but it's in my name so of course I"m responsible but without taking my name off the registration AND loan, I can't see a way out. HELP ME! Please tell me there's a miracle solution or law that I can threaten with.


Well going past the standard talk to a lawyer answer...

I think you might be out of luck. Is there anyway to switch vehicles, because unless there are new loans for both cars, I only see disaster coming for you if he defaults.


Can you take the truck and trade it in for a different car and just hand over your car to him?


I don't see how a divorce will split that up.

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#506 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 03:14 PM
 
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#507 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 03:34 PM
 
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I am grateful for my oldest Daughter who even though she feels miserable still woke up this morning gave me a hug and said I was her best friend.

I am gratful that my middle daughter is so happy even when she is sick she smile and claps her hands.

I am grateful that even though my pump parts are a little worse for wear they still are working enough that I was able to pump 20oz this morning and feed my baby.

I am thankful that the cat is not still sick and I didn't have to clean up kitty diarrhea this morning.

I am thankful I have one tin of apple juice left so the bigger girls will have juice for the weekend.

I am thankful that there are good people in the world.

I am thankful for MDC which has been a godsend more then once.

Nancy, Mom to Kyra (2005), Zoe (2006), Callie (2007) (2008), and Xavier (2009)
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#508 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 03:36 PM
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Well crap, now I'm sick. I had to miss work today because I don't know if I'm contagious (and I feel like sh!t) and of course the require a doctor's note so I have to spend money I don't have to see the doctor. You'd think a freaking nursing home would be a little more forgiving about the doctor's note, seeing as how I could potentially kill off some of the residents if I have influenza or something : I just hope I'm not pregnant again...
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#509 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 03:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by 2Sweeties1Angel View Post
Well crap, now I'm sick. I had to miss work today because I don't know if I'm contagious (and I feel like sh!t) and of course the require a doctor's note so I have to spend money I don't have to see the doctor. You'd think a freaking nursing home would be a little more forgiving about the doctor's note, seeing as how I could potentially kill off some of the residents if I have influenza or something : I just hope I'm not pregnant again...
Do you think you might be pg? I guess get tested at the docs too.

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#510 of 1547 Old 12-07-2007, 03:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by canadiannancy View Post
I am grateful for my oldest Daughter who even though she feels miserable still woke up this morning gave me a hug and said I was her best friend.

I am gratful that my middle daughter is so happy even when she is sick she smile and claps her hands.

I am grateful that even though my pump parts are a little worse for wear they still are working enough that I was able to pump 20oz this morning and feed my baby.

I am thankful that the cat is not still sick and I didn't have to clean up kitty diarrhea this morning.

I am thankful I have one tin of apple juice left so the bigger girls will have juice for the weekend.

I am thankful that there are good people in the world.

I am thankful for MDC which has been a godsend more then once.


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