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Jan '08 Lower Income and/or Struggling Mama's Support

27K views 688 replies 77 participants last post by  mum4boys 
#1 ·
Happy New Year Mama's!

Link to December '07 thread: http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=801816

Welcome to 2008!

For any struggling mama in need of support, though the majority on here are low income or in a large amount of debt... *all* are welcome.

This is a flame free support zone ONLY! This thread also gets very long (between 1500 and 2000+ posts) so be prepared for that. You do NOT have to reply to every post, you are allowed to whine and rant... we won't mind!


We have been trying to keep up a positive "Pay it Forward" attitude on this thread and help each other out. Many list "gratefuls"... things we are grateful for each day... even if it is only that we have our kids. There is always something, even if we don't feel it... that is to be grateful for.

Awesome, wonderful and WORTHY Mama's and Lurkers who posted in December: 98 mama's and counting!


Thystle
Nature
janerose
Crunchy Doula
Fruitful4Him
justmama
Iris' Mom
Aura_Kitten
amydidit
gradmama
SherryR
CaliMommie
kijip
vannienicole
Satori
LankyLizards
shayinme
ediesmom
bwylde
mum4boys
captain crunchy
momma earthical
slvsquared
s_kristina
sarah_bella1050
DuchsLove
natural_mama89
JamesMama
Belleweather
mrskennedy
~*Jaime
NamastePlatypus
sandygirl
dachshundqueen
2Sweeties1Angel
sonrisaa29
captivatedlife
cwat
chely7425
serenetabbie
eilonwy
MomOnDaEdge
AngelBee
vannienicole
serenetabbie
mamamoo (with guest appearance from rachelle-a-tron)
happyhippiemama
CluckyInAZ
Daniel's Kitty
Stace
~Nikki~
~Purity♥Lake~
MrsMike
barky586
Lauraplusmany
Myboysmom
Mom of 4 Sweeties
canadiannancy
southernmommie
sunshine's mama
asianyoushi
mamaofprincesses
acegmom
yarngoddess
sunanthem
canuckgal
UmmIbrahim
triscuitsmom
sanguine_speed
dionnakay
zersha
KnockedUpButtercup
binkin
Nursingnaturalmom
slmroczka
Myboysmom
sarah10998
MamaJamie
Dillpicklechip
Mearaina
ReikiMommy07
lorelei
CrunchyTamara
blairhoney
Oceanjones
hippiemum21580
averysmomma05
cubasianchica
magstphil
heyitstwins
susienjay
MamaWindmill
sarahloughmiller
kristenyostdc
Baby Makes 4
flibberlips

All you mama's remember this:

You are NOT your surroundings.

You are NOT your clothes.

You are NOT your home.

You are NOT your current situation.

You are NOT your bank account.

And you are NOT the sum of what one single person (stranger, friend, or family) thinks or says of you.

YOU are what YOU make of yourself and ONLY YOU can give that power away to others.

You are worthy. Don't "allow" others to "take" that from you!


 
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#304 ·
justmama...congrats. Your picture bring back my preemie experience in July. We were 34 weeks...the first moments (the gloved hands/needles/tubes), the first pictures in the incubator...if you need any support I'm here. I glossed through all of that but if I was honest with myself it was hard.
 
#305 ·
Oh, and leaving the hospital while my baby stayed was very hard for me too. Almost surreal. So strange.
I also was longing for my perfect birth...I'd had one induced hospital birth with epi, one natural hospital birth and felt I was "coming home" with my natural homebirth. Baby had other plans. It's something I had to grieve and am still slowly grieving. I'm sorry you didn't have the birth you planned.
 
#308 ·
I'm new. Hubby and I have always been lower to lower-middle class. Then I had Dom, and we decided I'd be a SAHM, no matter the cost, no matter the grief from my family (because I'm "wasting" my education), no matter what. I am so blessed to be able to do this.

We struggle. My hubby's been out of work since the week before Thanksgiving, and my Mom's been paying our rent, and it's still late every month. The car payment hasn't been paid since November and credit cards are in default. We don't get enough foodstamps to make a difference (but I have a meeting on the 15th to hopefully increase the amount). We eat a lot of beans, lol!

Through it all, though, I'm grateful that we have ENOUGH. I'd like to have some extra sometime, but ENOUGH is a lot more than some people have. Dom has health insurance through the state, we have a roof over our head, we won't starve.

I think you've got a wonderful thread going!

Welcome to the world, Baby Grace!
 
#309 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by VivC View Post
I'm new. Hubby and I have always been lower to lower-middle class. Then I had Dom, and we decided I'd be a SAHM, no matter the cost, no matter the grief from my family (because I'm "wasting" my education), no matter what. I am so blessed to be able to do this.

We struggle. My hubby's been out of work since the week before Thanksgiving, and my Mom's been paying our rent, and it's still late every month. The car payment hasn't been paid since November and credit cards are in default. We don't get enough foodstamps to make a difference (but I have a meeting on the 15th to hopefully increase the amount). We eat a lot of beans, lol!

Through it all, though, I'm grateful that we have ENOUGH. I'd like to have some extra sometime, but ENOUGH is a lot more than some people have. Dom has health insurance through the state, we have a roof over our head, we won't starve.

I think you've got a wonderful thread going!

Welcome to the world, Baby Grace!
Welcome! Have you applied for WIC too?
 
#310 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by justmama View Post
minutes after the birth
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2.../01_06_0-1.jpg

next morning when we got to visit her
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...gs/01_06_3.jpg

next morning
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_21.jpg

first time mommy holds Grace
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_16.jpg

daddy and Grace- nearly 24hours old
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_17.jpg

Pics are a bit dark due to it being low lighting in the nicu and she's extremely light-sensitive so we didnt' use the flash much. Hopefully I'll get some good pics of her in her first clothing tonight at her feeding.
She is darling!
I have to say mama looks pretty dam good too for just having had a baby!
 
#312 ·
You mama's have been busy! I've been gone a few days and wont even try catching up there's been so many posts. I had a fun couple days, Friday I was sitting in the front seat nursing the baby when some lady hit me in the parking lot pulling in and didn't even realize it, pulled in way to fast and acted irritated when I called her on it and told her she hit me and she totally didn't believe it until she saw her car parked smack up against mine, she thought she hit the curb! If I hit the curb I back up a bit, guess that thought didn't occur to her. Its a really tiny dent in my front fender, not worth hassling over (I got rear ended last Dec and was in pain for months and got screwed after the jerk said I backed into him which was totally not true) after my last experience. Apparently she hit me a little harder then I thought cause my neck and back have been hurting since a few hours after the accident
I ended up in the hospital for the day yesterday cause I forgot to take my meds and ended up with heart arrhythmia's and joy o joy that lower back/flank pain I've had for a couple days is from a UTI and I'm anemic again which sucks
I swear Celiac SUCKS. Its an insidious disease and even when you treat it right and NEVER cheat it still bites you in the ass on a regular basis. I had to spend most of the money I had for my PG&E bill (those people are extortionist! Got my 1st full months bill Saturday, didn't go over baseline for gas or electric and it was still $90!) to pay for the only vitamins my body seems to absorb (Twin labs prenatels and Tri-Boron-Plus) so I wouldn't end up in the dang hospital again. (ok, so I didn't totally forget, I couldn't afford them either) now I gotta figure out how I'm going to pay PG&E.
 
#313 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Satori View Post
You mama's have been busy! I've been gone a few days and wont even try catching up there's been so many posts. I had a fun couple days, Friday I was sitting in the front seat nursing the baby when some lady hit me in the parking lot pulling in and didn't even realize it, pulled in way to fast and acted irritated when I called her on it and told her she hit me and she totally didn't believe it until she saw her car parked smack up against mine, she thought she hit the curb! If I hit the curb I back up a bit, guess that thought didn't occur to her. Its a really tiny dent in my front fender, not worth hassling over (I got rear ended last Dec and was in pain for months and got screwed after the jerk said I backed into him which was totally not true) after my last experience. Apparently she hit me a little harder then I thought cause my neck and back have been hurting since a few hours after the accident
I ended up in the hospital for the day yesterday cause I forgot to take my meds and ended up with heart arrhythmia's and joy o joy that lower back/flank pain I've had for a couple days is from a UTI and I'm anemic again which sucks
I swear Celiac SUCKS. Its an insidious disease and even when you treat it right and NEVER cheat it still bites you in the ass on a regular basis. I had to spend most of the money I had for my PG&E bill (those people are extortionist! Got my 1st full months bill Saturday, didn't go over baseline for gas or electric and it was still $90!) to pay for the only vitamins my body seems to absorb (Twin labs prenatels and Tri-Boron-Plus) so I wouldn't end up in the dang hospital again. (ok, so I didn't totally forget, I couldn't afford them either) now I gotta figure out how I'm going to pay PG&E.

Feel better!
 
#314 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by justmama View Post
minutes after the birth
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2.../01_06_0-1.jpg

next morning when we got to visit her
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...gs/01_06_3.jpg

next morning
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_21.jpg

first time mommy holds Grace
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_16.jpg

daddy and Grace- nearly 24hours old
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_17.jpg

Pics are a bit dark due to it being low lighting in the nicu and she's extremely light-sensitive so we didnt' use the flash much. Hopefully I'll get some good pics of her in her first clothing tonight at her feeding.
Oh! She is beautiful!! What a lovely family you have mama. She's so tiny!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Satori View Post
You mama's have been busy! I've been gone a few days and wont even try catching up there's been so many posts. I had a fun couple days, Friday I was sitting in the front seat nursing the baby when some lady hit me in the parking lot pulling in and didn't even realize it, pulled in way to fast and acted irritated when I called her on it and told her she hit me and she totally didn't believe it until she saw her car parked smack up against mine, she thought she hit the curb! If I hit the curb I back up a bit, guess that thought didn't occur to her. Its a really tiny dent in my front fender, not worth hassling over (I got rear ended last Dec and was in pain for months and got screwed after the jerk said I backed into him which was totally not true) after my last experience. Apparently she hit me a little harder then I thought cause my neck and back have been hurting since a few hours after the accident
I ended up in the hospital for the day yesterday cause I forgot to take my meds and ended up with heart arrhythmia's and joy o joy that lower back/flank pain I've had for a couple days is from a UTI and I'm anemic again which sucks
I swear Celiac SUCKS. Its an insidious disease and even when you treat it right and NEVER cheat it still bites you in the ass on a regular basis. I had to spend most of the money I had for my PG&E bill (those people are extortionist! Got my 1st full months bill Saturday, didn't go over baseline for gas or electric and it was still $90!) to pay for the only vitamins my body seems to absorb (Twin labs prenatels and Tri-Boron-Plus) so I wouldn't end up in the dang hospital again. (ok, so I didn't totally forget, I couldn't afford them either) now I gotta figure out how I'm going to pay PG&E.

I hope the money comes to you mama. Get better.
 
#317 ·
This thread moves FAST! Yes, we have WIC - we're automatically eligible because Dom's on the state insurance.
 
#319 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by VivC View Post
I'm new. Hubby and I have always been lower to lower-middle class. Then I had Dom, and we decided I'd be a SAHM, no matter the cost, no matter the grief from my family (because I'm "wasting" my education), no matter what. I am so blessed to be able to do this.

We struggle. My hubby's been out of work since the week before Thanksgiving, and my Mom's been paying our rent, and it's still late every month. The car payment hasn't been paid since November and credit cards are in default. We don't get enough foodstamps to make a difference (but I have a meeting on the 15th to hopefully increase the amount). We eat a lot of beans, lol!

Through it all, though, I'm grateful that we have ENOUGH. I'd like to have some extra sometime, but ENOUGH is a lot more than some people have. Dom has health insurance through the state, we have a roof over our head, we won't starve.

I think you've got a wonderful thread going!

Welcome to the world, Baby Grace!
welcome viv


Quote:

Originally Posted by Nature View Post
Needs List Update!

You can take out my need for a potty seat.
I spent a gift card today and I'm going to give the potty seat to her as a birthday present.

yay! don't bring it back


Quote:

Originally Posted by Satori View Post
You mama's have been busy! I've been gone a few days and wont even try catching up there's been so many posts. I had a fun couple days, Friday I was sitting in the front seat nursing the baby when some lady hit me in the parking lot pulling in and didn't even realize it, pulled in way to fast and acted irritated when I called her on it and told her she hit me and she totally didn't believe it until she saw her car parked smack up against mine, she thought she hit the curb! If I hit the curb I back up a bit, guess that thought didn't occur to her. Its a really tiny dent in my front fender, not worth hassling over (I got rear ended last Dec and was in pain for months and got screwed after the jerk said I backed into him which was totally not true) after my last experience. Apparently she hit me a little harder then I thought cause my neck and back have been hurting since a few hours after the accident
I ended up in the hospital for the day yesterday cause I forgot to take my meds and ended up with heart arrhythmia's and joy o joy that lower back/flank pain I've had for a couple days is from a UTI and I'm anemic again which sucks
I swear Celiac SUCKS. Its an insidious disease and even when you treat it right and NEVER cheat it still bites you in the ass on a regular basis. I had to spend most of the money I had for my PG&E bill (those people are extortionist! Got my 1st full months bill Saturday, didn't go over baseline for gas or electric and it was still $90!) to pay for the only vitamins my body seems to absorb (Twin labs prenatels and Tri-Boron-Plus) so I wouldn't end up in the dang hospital again. (ok, so I didn't totally forget, I couldn't afford them either) now I gotta figure out how I'm going to pay PG&E.

i know the feeling of buying vits and supps at the expense of other bills
its needed, though. if you can't function....and i can't....without the supps, you just gotta do it.

and it always works out....scary, but it works.

justmamaGrace is so pretty. those cheeks
my littles always have those big yummy cheeks. and very content. sending perfect growth and mama milk vibes your way!

so, good morning mamas!

i'm grumpy this morning
started bleeding early and in the middle of the night....now i'm crampy and beat.

i need to get edie ready for school....be back
 
#320 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by ediesmom View Post

yay! don't bring it back


Damn! You know me too well!

I will try very very hard not to return it!!


I've got to go wake dh up and see if he can bring my daughter to school. Sierra missed her bus this morning because she couldn't put her shoes and socks on fast enough. Poor thing fell off her sled yesterday with her father and landed on her tail bone. She's walking around whining, "You have NO idea how bad this feels mama!" Oh I don't? Course not. I only broke mine while I was in labor with your sister.. but oooookay!
She's been walking around saying that she can't put her shoes on herself, and that she can't pick anything up on the floor. I have to giggle about it, because gosh.. yanno... I think she might know what it feels like to be pregnant me right about now.


I have an OB appointment this morning, and some errands to run, bills to pay.. I shall return!

Have a great morning ladies!

ediesmom I hope you feel better today.

Welcome Viv!
 
#321 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by justmama View Post
minutes after the birth
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2.../01_06_0-1.jpg

next morning when we got to visit her
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...gs/01_06_3.jpg

next morning
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_21.jpg

first time mommy holds Grace
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_16.jpg

daddy and Grace- nearly 24hours old
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_17.jpg

Pics are a bit dark due to it being low lighting in the nicu and she's extremely light-sensitive so we didnt' use the flash much. Hopefully I'll get some good pics of her in her first clothing tonight at her feeding.
Congratuations! Those are some beautiful pictures. It's wonderful to hear she is doing so well.
 
#322 ·
Congrats, justmama! She's a doll.
Here's to a short & easy NICU stay (though it's never easy, is it?).

When BeanBean went to NICU, one of mike's aunts said something about how convinient that must be for me, that I could go home without the baby and get things absolutely perfect before he came home.
As if I could think of anything other than getting back there every three hours.
I really wondere about the way that some people think.
 
#324 ·
i just feel like crying

i have a million things to do today, i'm grumpy and bleeding, and a gf called at the last minute idno a sitter


so, of course...i'm sitting

and time is moving SOOOOOooooo....slow

my body is here.....my mind is downtown

and she asked me not to take the lo out


oh, and they are ALWAYS late.....for everything. so, even though i am expecting them by 1230, i know it will be later




the lo is someone i enjoy, tho....so that makes it bearable
 
#325 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by justmama View Post
minutes after the birth
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2.../01_06_0-1.jpg

next morning when we got to visit her
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...gs/01_06_3.jpg

next morning
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_21.jpg

first time mommy holds Grace
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_16.jpg

daddy and Grace- nearly 24hours old
http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e2...s/01_06_17.jpg

Pics are a bit dark due to it being low lighting in the nicu and she's extremely light-sensitive so we didnt' use the flash much. Hopefully I'll get some good pics of her in her first clothing tonight at her feeding.
She is so precious!! And you look amazing, btw, for just having given birth!

I feel much better today. DH candled my ears last night and I slept for, oh, about 14 hours
He woke me up for some soup and grilled cheese last night, then I went right back to sleeping. I feel so much better today, almost human again
 
#326 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by asianyoushi View Post
the state will cover dd's medical insurance til july 08 but will not cover ds 's after this month. i am so annoyed. gota call them monday....

anyone understand this????

both kids r dh's
ashlyn is 19 months older

there reason stated on the paper work said alex's income was 448.62 more then allowed... i didnt know a 13 month old can have an income..
update:
called them
:
:
:
:
:

ashlyn-dd- her coverage doesnt end til july 2008 because i guess i applied for her last july..

alex ends this month because hubby made too much money...
i didnt speak with my case worker cuz she is out of the office today but spoke with another person. they said that they take the three months pay checks-( u send copies in when u apply)average the gross income and if its under the 3100 u are qualified.
now i have to wait for hubby's pay to level off(he has been working over time alot the last 2 months to help us get out of debt)- hubby *thinks* we will be able to reapply for alex in april or may...) i really hope that is true because i really want him to have coverage.
 
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