Jan '08 Lower Income and/or Struggling Mama's Support - Page 13 - Mothering Forums

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Old 01-08-2008, 09:59 PM
 
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I'm doing well. Started school last night. I can notbelieve how much I have forgotten in 6 years and 3 babies. LOL I missed this thread too!!

Single mama to Alex(13), Maddy(12), Sam(8), Violet(6), and Ruby(3). fly-by-nursing1.gif
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Old 01-08-2008, 10:34 PM
 
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Got my grades for fall semester: I got a 3.0!! I am taking 12 units next semester: 10-12, M-F.

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Old 01-08-2008, 11:30 PM
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I've just removed more posts for violations of the UA...

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Old 01-09-2008, 12:14 AM
 
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Old 01-09-2008, 12:16 AM
 
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: just went outside holy cow its cold anyways i dont know why more post were deleted i didnt see anything wrong with posts that were deleted...
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Old 01-09-2008, 12:17 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nature View Post
exactly


how is everyone tonight, anyways?
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Old 01-09-2008, 12:20 AM
 
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its okay. i think i am coming to grips with being pregnant again. just scary
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Old 01-09-2008, 12:28 AM
 
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come on mamas - Let's just try to get back to business as usual.

please don't leave nature & thystle, and anyone else that has gone into lurking.

We are here, we are strong, we are the lower income moms!
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Old 01-09-2008, 12:39 AM
 
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DD is finally asleep! I think she is starting to calm down from the whole ordeal of our time in oklahoma. She's pretty tramautized from the whole thing I think.

Now that I'm not using my brother's PC, I can tell you all what was going on there.

The house was filthy, with mice & rats & bugs, the floors were 2 ft high in trash, laundry, and food. There was no sinks or cupboards, or even a table for the first few days. And my brother and his ex-wife fought constantly, and yelled at their children all the time . His ex-wife left while we were there - didn't even tell the kids bye or anything {left while they were at school} and so we had that whole mess to deal with.

I tried to clean the place up, and cook real food {they only were eating fast food, and sweets all the time for the kids}. But just as fast as I'd clean, they'd just mess it up again because the kids litterly didn't know any better, and their mother is an idiot. I even read bedtime stories to the kids, and my nephew told me he'd never been read a story at home before!

We finally just got fed up with it and left because I wasn't getting anywhere with the specialist I was supposed to see {who called TODAY to set an appt : }, and I wasn't getting anywhere with the house or the kids either.

And the worst part - my so-called brother didn't even thank me for babysitting 24/7, cleaning his house, cooking meals, and buying food.

That will definatly be the last time I even try to help a family member.

and now I've got to get DD back to okay again, poor little thing is just so stressed that if anyone yells she just starts bawling. I feel so bad for putting her in that place.

ETA:

Does anyone have any ideas for what I CAN do to help my brother's children? I've debated calling CPS on them, but I know nothing would happen because it's been done before.
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Old 01-09-2008, 12:47 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by asianyoushi View Post
its okay. i think i am coming to grips with being pregnant again. just scary
congrats on being pregnant again! Wait, is it a bad thing??? Not planned? Medical issues? I must have missed something.

If it makes you feel any better I've had 3 unplanned pregnancies at times in my life where it has been nearly impossible to be excited about them and so far everything has worked itself out in a positive way. It's a struggle but they are so worth it. Just think positive about it mama. Trust that you WILL make it through whatever lies ahead and it will happen one way or the other. Stay strong. It really is a blessing even when it doesn't come at a good time or it comes with a heavy load of emotion. Grace came at a time when I was separating from my husband, going back to work after 3 years of being a sahm, and after a very medicalized scary, preterm pregnancy and birth 3 years prior to. And while Grace was another medicalized scary preterm pregnancy and birth, she is 100% worth it and we are making it through slowly but surely.

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Old 01-09-2008, 12:50 AM
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Aargh! DH is definitely going to need surgery on his back. He went to the doctor today to get his MRI results and he has badly herniated disks. His doctor is extremely pro-chiropractic but told him to definitely not let a chiro touch him now because he could get hurt even worse. Great. He's going to schedule an appointment with the guy that did my Dad's back surgery. It's a good thing I haven't been relying on DH's income to pay the bills because we'd be screwed--he's not going to be able to work for awhile after the surgery.

We had two residents pass away at work since Sunday morning and are waiting for the next one to go since they always go in threes I hope I don't go in tomorrow to get someone up and find a dead body. Whoever finds them has to clean them up and there's paperwork.

I grateful for:
--health insurance. Without it, we'd be royally screwed. Yesterday I got about $500 worth of meds for less than $80.

--my health. I'm not perfectly healthy, but I'm healthy enough I guess. I can work FT. Mainly, I just have bipolar, hypothyroid, and I'm morbidly obese so nothing really major.

--my family. God, do they ever get on my nerves but I don't know what I'd do without them.
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Old 01-09-2008, 01:05 AM
 
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congrats on being pregnant again! Wait, is it a bad thing??? Not planned? Medical issues? I must have missed something.

If it makes you feel any better I've had 3 unplanned pregnancies at times in my life where it has been nearly impossible to be excited about them and so far everything has worked itself out in a positive way. It's a struggle but they are so worth it. Just think positive about it mama. Trust that you WILL make it through whatever lies ahead and it will happen one way or the other. Stay strong. It really is a blessing even when it doesn't come at a good time or it comes with a heavy load of emotion. Grace came at a time when I was separating from my husband, going back to work after 3 years of being a sahm, and after a very medicalized scary, preterm pregnancy and birth 3 years prior to. And while Grace was another medicalized scary preterm pregnancy and birth, she is 100% worth it and we are making it through slowly but surely.
not planned. no medical issues. its just i dont drive-no liencse and the thought of having 3 kids scares me. i will be home bound indefinitely . all my kids were not planned- dd was concieved a month after i graduated hs. pregnNCY WAS HORRIBLE.ds was conceived when we were living at my parents cuz we were to broke to have aplace of our own. hubby left while i was 5 month preggo. he came back to his senses 1 month before ds was born. our relationship is rocky. we are in debt upto our eyeballs- and dh totally belittled me yesterday cuz i dont have a paying job..he wants to up root us and move to another state. its just not a idea atmosphere to bring another child into the mix. i gonna ask my doc for a test tomorrow and hopefully get insurance started up again-they need proof of pregnancy..
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Old 01-09-2008, 01:09 AM
 
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Originally Posted by asianyoushi View Post
not planned. no medical issues. its just i dont drive-no liencse and the thought of having 3 kids scares me. i will be home bound indefinitely . all my kids were not planned- dd was concieved a month after i graduated hs. pregnNCY WAS HORRIBLE.ds was conceived when we were living at my parents cuz we were to broke to have aplace of our own. hubby left while i was 5 month preggo. he came back to his senses 1 month before ds was born. our relationship is rocky. we are in debt upto our eyeballs- and dh totally belittled me yesterday cuz i dont have a paying job..he wants to up root us and move to another state. its just not a idea atmosphere to bring another child into the mix. i gonna ask my doc for a test tomorrow and hopefully get insurance started up again-they need proof of pregnancy..
oh mama.

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Old 01-09-2008, 05:57 PM
 
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I'm re-opening this thread and bumping it back up.

If you have concerns or questions please just send a PM. I'm happy to help where I am able or direct you to who can (if it is concerns/disagreements about the policy, you have to send a Private Message to abimommy, one of our administrators, about that).

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Old 01-09-2008, 06:24 PM
 
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Nothing has been moved to the giving forum as far as I know. I will be sure that nothing is if that is what you want.

Again - PM mamas. PM please. I really, really don't want to have this thread get locked or removed because you don't. Posts that should have been PM'd to the administrator as requested have been removed as that is a violation of UA #7.

UPDATE: Nothing has been moved and I've left a note not to.

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Old 01-09-2008, 06:29 PM
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So we're not even allowed to have a list of ISOs and Haves, if we only arrange the exchanging over PMs?

We very, very rarely talk about the actual exchanges on here - just thank yous, and so-and-so might be able to help you, things like that.

This is a bummer.
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Old 01-09-2008, 06:31 PM
 
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No. I'm sorry. It's been an MDC policy for a very long time (the post from Cynthia I quoted is from 2006, but she and the admins just confirmed that is still the policy the other day).

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cynthia Mosher View Post
we have always moved swaps to the MDC Co-ops and Swaps forum, or removed swap threads and directed members to the Swaps forum, whenever we were aware of threads.

I understand some members want to have their own private swaps, and that's a reasonable desire. However, MDC does not host swaps or giving threads that exclude members beyond the criteria that is set for participation by MDC. So a swap that is permitted only for specific members based on whatever criteria a group of members put in place is not something we can host. That is a private swap and should be taken to a private venue.

MDC has a swap forum with specific criteria. Members organizing and participating in swaps here at MDC must do so through the swap forum, just as buying, selling and trading items must be done through the Trading Post and Fairy and Giving threads must be posted to the MDC Fairy and MDC Giving forums. To allow members to post anywhere on the boards to organize swaps would be to allow them to bypass and ignore our rules and guidelines in place for such activity. If this is what members desire - to organize a swap that can restrict participation of MDC members to those they wish to include and exclude those they wish to exclude - then they need to organize such swaps outside of MDC where they have the full right to place their own rules and guidelines.

For organizational purposes I think it is fine for members to use the PM system to communicate such an activity with those in their club; however, MDC will not be responsible for any outcome of such activities nor will the mods or administration be involved in resolving any issues that may arise.
I really do get that it's a bummer. I'm sorry. The only place you can have a list is in Giving. The thread can be titled low income mamas, but it can't exclude other MDC members. Which being a tribe, it doesn't seem like you do anyway. The lists and organizing etc just all have to go in the right forum.

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Old 01-09-2008, 06:31 PM
 
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I have missed everyone!!

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Old 01-09-2008, 06:34 PM
 
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i missed the mamas here

i want to say that the resource sharing here is so different than 'giving'. we resource share among ourselves to relieve some of the struggles that are unique to mamas living with poverty. it is called solidarity.

i vote to NOT post our list in 'giving'. and if it is voted that it be posted there, i ask that my needs/ haves be removed.

mamas, we will have a space to resource share among those who are in need.

proverbs 29:7 the righteous care about justice for the poor, but the wicked have no such concern.

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Old 01-09-2008, 06:53 PM
 
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Old 01-09-2008, 06:57 PM
 
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For those who want their stuff removed from the list -- send a PM to sandygirl. She has the list.

Wife of 1. Mom of 3. Conquering disability challenges, one achievement at a time.
 

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Old 01-09-2008, 06:58 PM
 
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I have been missing reading here while nursing/pumping, even if I haven't been able to post much...I know rules are rules...but seemed like such a positive thing the needs/haves posts...and fundraising? I missed that unless....nevermind...I am just little confused....

Nancy, Mom to Kyra (2005), Zoe (2006), Callie (2007) (2008), and Xavier (2009)
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Old 01-09-2008, 07:26 PM
 
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I am confused. Is our list in the Giving section? Because I can't find it.

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Old 01-09-2008, 07:40 PM
 
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I'm just glad we're back, although I have to say my home looked amazing when this thread was offline!!!!
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Old 01-09-2008, 09:13 PM
 
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If you're confused, the best thing to do--and the best way to keep within the UA and keep the thread up--is to PM a moderator.

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Old 01-09-2008, 09:19 PM
 
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So glad to see you all again! I've been lurking and not posting, as the morning sickness has turned all day sickness has turned disaster....I've been lying around and puking alternately for days now....sucky. I started on Zofran today, so hopefully things are about to look up - I'm starving : but haven't been able to keep anything down.

Jaime - I don't think that there's a thread in giving yet. To my understanding, the mods PM'd the list to thystle and sandygirl and that's where it stands now...waiting for a decision from everyone as to what to do.

Quote:
If you do not want to host a thread in Giving or Swaps, then a Yahoo Group or Google Group would be another option.
Does anyone think we should set up a yahoogroup or googlegroup for sharing items? This would keep our exchanges private, but also take them off the boards. I think they're pretty easy to set up. I know that a major concern is that we'd like to exchange items amongst ourselves, without feeling like we're asking for charity. This could be facilitated with a private group.

Sandi - Work at home writer mama to Zoe the monkey girl 9/06 and Luna the zen baby 8/08
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Old 01-09-2008, 09:43 PM
 
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I think the yahoo group would be a good idea.

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Old 01-09-2008, 10:07 PM
 
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a grateful: alex got a clean bill of health today at the doctors, we didnt confirm my pregnancy since we dont have the extra 50 dollars to pay for the lab pee sample/test. i think i will be going to the pregnancy resource center tomrrow to confirm. i dont know - have to talk it over with the dh. he didnt think i am pregnant earlier today but on our way home from the doc appointment he was joking aorund and was touching my chin and i freaking snapped at him and started crying asking him why he was playing with my "double chin" and he said HOLY $HIT u are pregnant how can u go from laughing to crying within a few seconds... right now we arent talking.....
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Old 01-09-2008, 10:17 PM
 
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http://groups.google.com/intl/en/goo...ur3/index.html Here's a tour of how google groups works

Yahoo works similarly, but is all through email.

Sandi - Work at home writer mama to Zoe the monkey girl 9/06 and Luna the zen baby 8/08
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Old 01-10-2008, 12:18 AM
 
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A yahoo or google group sounds like a good solution. to everyone! We have our electricity back!! 5 days without it sucked. I had to throw out all of the food in the fridge & freezer! My grandparents brought us dinner (meatloaf, mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, milk, bread & butter!) last night & are bringing dinner over again tonight Such a treat to have a yummy dinner & not have to cook!

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