What should I take? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 03-10-2005, 09:38 PM - Thread Starter
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My DH just told me that our neighbor was killed today, and normally I would take something for the family to eat in the next few days. The only thing is that the family has severe food allergies. The daughter and her boys cannot have anything w/ sugar in it (they are not allergic to sugar, but the way it is processed, but I'm not sure if they can eat sucaant, and that's all I have here besides regular sugar). Any ideas on what I should take? Usually potatoe soup is a good calming, easy to store/freeze meal, but I'm not sure about some of the things I put in it (creamed corn?). Right now I'm thinking just taking a turkey and maybe some mashed potatoes (tomarrow night or Saturday, depending on when they need it). Does anyone know the ettiquite about this? SHould I take a list of everything I put on it? I really don't want to call and ask at this time. It was an accident, so not forseen. Any allergy prone mamas, I'd love your opinion on this. I'd hate for them to get sick on top of all the pain they are already in.

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#2 of 6 Old 03-10-2005, 11:52 PM
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Turkey and mashed potatoes sounds wonderful to me. Maybe with a salad if you are feeling ambitious. It's the thought that counts and that is also what they will remember. If they can't eat it then they will have something to serve guests who come to offer condolences. I am sure they are used to modifying their diet but will really appreciate your thoughtfulness. So sorry to hear about your neighbor.
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#3 of 6 Old 03-11-2005, 12:43 PM
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Wow something similar happened this week to me- a neighbors' grandchild died of SIDS. The wake was tuesday evening and I knew she had to get something to have on hand for the guests. I went to the bakery and bought stuff for that night. I brough it over that morning and she was grateful.

They will have a lot of people calling on them in the next few weeks also. Bring over a turkey and mashed pototatoes and/or something to feed anyone coming by. While running your errands, do some of hers- dry cleaning, picking up stuff at the store- she will appreciate it.

Also when dropping off the food, offer to have the kids come over to play on a specified day. If she declines, ask what day works better- she does have a lot of details to take care of and needs the help. Or something similar.

"The true joy of life is the trip. The station is only a dream. It constantly out distances us."
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#4 of 6 Old 03-11-2005, 06:48 PM - Thread Starter
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I called a good friend and they cannot even have any meat from the grocery store including a turkey, so I'm taking a roast from our beef (no processing, ect.) potatoes, and carrots. I think MIL is making a salad, and we are taking ours Sat. night b/c several have offered to take food today. Not many know of the food allergies, and I know alot of the food guests can eat, but her daughter and her boys cannot. I hate to think of her trying to keep them out of stuff, and not having much to eat herself durring all of this. It was such a tragic accident (tractor overturning, and her DH found her, it just makes me sick to think of it). I will offer to take the boys if needed, too. Thanks for the suggestions.
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#5 of 6 Old 03-13-2005, 02:59 AM
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after ailsa was born people brought us food. There's lots of stuff I can't eat, and was being especially vigilant while recovering/nursing a newborn. If they asked what I suggested (after I tell them what not to bring and their eyes glaze over) i would say beef stew with no onions. Beef stew is pretty safe. Beef and vegtables. I was so gratefull for the beef stew as there was lots for dh to eat, but not so much for me. So, if you decide to make another trip over (which you might want to do the week after next, when all the donated food has run out and people have forgotten) that's what I'd suggest.


Canadian mama to A (C/S May 2004) and R (induced VBAC Dec 2007) expecting #3 in July.  Currently obsessing over permaculture, photography and beekeeping.

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#6 of 6 Old 04-25-2005, 03:27 PM
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A distant family member of our died in 9-11 tragedy. The family got so many pasta dishes I think they got sick of it. My mom asked what they could bring down, and the wife of the deceased said, anything but pasta. My mom brought 12 lobsters and they had a feast. I know that can run on the expensive side, but just an idea.

Just sharing my experience
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