Striving For A More Simple/Minimalist Life in 2010 - Page 8 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#211 of 230 Old 03-26-2010, 11:35 AM
 
FreeRangeMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 3,310
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I get where you are coming from zoebird. We didn't emigrate, but we redid our hardwood floors and had to move out all our furniture several years ago. We actually just sold most of it and freecycled the rest. It was rather liberating to live without furniture for a while. We were planning a move at that time (we didn't do it though) so I got rid of lots of our other belongings as well. I really cherished the emptiness while we had it. We chose to not replace things for a good long while. It felt good to be in such a clear space. When the empty feeling started to feel like a hindrance we started to replace it. I wish I was then where I am now, I wouldn't have just filled the house up again. Life is a journey and I wasn't at that place yet, my stuff was still bringing me comfort and security.

We did face all sorts of judgments though, everything from the idea that we were too poor for furniture to the idea that we were living an "alternative lifestyle"- said with much judgment in a low-tone. It was weird how people reacted to our sparse surroundings.

We are doing a low-scale (4-kid friendly) version of that know. We have scaled back our belongings drastically. We have the necessary furniture (and all items we love) but have gone minimalist with everything else. My thinking is that we will only keep what one would have in a summer cabin. I think that if a family could get by on that amount for a summer then why not all the time?

It has been a cathartic experience in determining the place of stuff in our lives. Once we aren't filling our homes (and by extension ourselves) with STUFF we have the openness to bring in the new. Not new stuff, but new ideas, adventures, relationships, goals, etc. It is interesting to note that as our space becomes more clear our budget improves. Our frivolous spending decreases (not by effort, it has just happened on our own). Our energy has increased, our home feels more peaceful.

We still have a ways to go, I am having a hard time figuring out things that belong to the kids and homeschooling supplies. I would get rid of it all as we don't use it, but I need to stay respectful of their wishes as well. Also, we have a few large items that I am able to let go but are waiting for their new homes.


 

FreeRangeMama is offline  
#212 of 230 Old 03-26-2010, 08:39 PM
Banned
 
accountclosed3's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 11,906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
we also felt that way--liberated--and that we are more frugal, more energetic, and the house feels more peaceful.

we still have not decided on the table.

we have one--purchased used based on our lengthy discussions--and it quickly broke. LOL! so, now it's up-side-down, waiting to be repaired or sent on it's way, and we have nick named it our "northern hemisphere table." hawk likes to play in it and make little forts, so i'm happy for it to be used that way for now. but we do need to make a decision on it.

it is interesting with the addition of a small one. they see things differently. it will be interesting to see what is up with hawk.
accountclosed3 is offline  
#213 of 230 Old 03-26-2010, 08:48 PM
 
starling&diesel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: West Coast, Canada
Posts: 3,823
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 6 Post(s)
[QUOTE=zoebird;15229771

we have one--purchased used based on our lengthy discussions--and it quickly broke. [/QUOTE]

How frustrating ... we often think loooooong and hard about our purchases, only to regret our final decision. I think we sometimes overthink things in our efforts to live simply and frugally.

We often ask ourselves, "Should we spend more and get a better quality _____, or should we try to save money and take our chances with something off of Craigslist or the like?"

Not sure what is the best answer. We just had this discussion about a bike trailer. We decided to save money and buy used. Very used. I'm hoping to get a couple years out of it. The bonus is that no one is likely to steal it because it's so faded and rusty! But it still does the job just fine!

dust.gifFour-eyed tattooed fairy godmother queer, mama to my lucky star (5) and little bird (2.5). Resident storyteller at www.thestoryforest.com. Enchanting audiostories for curious kids. Come play in the forest!
starling&diesel is online now  
#214 of 230 Old 03-26-2010, 09:17 PM
Banned
 
accountclosed3's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 11,906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
S/D:

we don't regret the decision. we just now have to make a new one.

DF:

seriously, can you get more judgmental?

1. i don't see it as "i was special" at that time, but that the time itself was special. if i seek to memorialize it in some way, it's none of your freakin' business to judge how i do that or why.

2. i am, and always have been, "in the moment" with my son. whether i buy an object t memorialize a special time does not indicate that i am not "in the moment" with him and his toddlerhood or at any other age beyond infancy.

as it is, i am in the process of buying objects for him to facilitate his toddlerhood. we are shopping for a riding toy for the house and planning out activities for him over the next two months. this is being budgeted. so, i'm well aware of his toddlerhood and thoroughly enjoying every minute of it TYVM.

So, why don't you just apologize?

----

aside from it all, i have decided to not buy an object to memorialize that special time, but i have connected my artist friend with my homebirthing connections here.

but, i am still considering buying a fruit bowl from her.

and, i can't decide between the colombian pot or the le creuset one. probably le creuset, anyway. i do take to flights of fancy.
accountclosed3 is offline  
#215 of 230 Old 03-26-2010, 09:26 PM
 
starling&diesel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: West Coast, Canada
Posts: 3,823
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 6 Post(s)
zoebird ... I'm starting to feel like this thread is all about you. Perhaps those of us who want a genuine discussion could start a new thread and leave this one to you.

This thread is not about simplicity at all, what with all the bickering.

Peace, out.

dust.gifFour-eyed tattooed fairy godmother queer, mama to my lucky star (5) and little bird (2.5). Resident storyteller at www.thestoryforest.com. Enchanting audiostories for curious kids. Come play in the forest!
starling&diesel is online now  
#216 of 230 Old 03-26-2010, 09:57 PM
 
Sweetmama26's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: The center of the universe
Posts: 296
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I can see where zoebird is coming from, she feels like she's being attacked and DF's tone is very condescending from what I've been reading, I don't see how her buying of a bowl is not living minimally, to memorialize something or otherwise.

Krys(29) DP to Ad (32)
~Attachment, co-sleeping parents to CJ (10/08)~ Mama to an angel baby born at 25.5 weeks Sophie (01/10)

Sweetmama26 is offline  
#217 of 230 Old 03-26-2010, 10:04 PM
 
FreeRangeMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 3,310
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I think buying the bowl is a lovely idea as well. Why not fill our homes with things we love, things that are beautiful, and things that bring us joy. Better to be surrounded by a few things that we love than lots of things we don't.

I don't see why we should be criticizing one another, we are all in different places on the same journey!


 

FreeRangeMama is offline  
#218 of 230 Old 03-27-2010, 03:03 AM
 
durafemina's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 832
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Zoebird - that's some seriously beautiful cookware! (the Colombian)

I have designs on some Le Creuset or the like one day, when we are. . . less mobile? I dunno - I'm just wary of buying 'heavy' (in the weight and budget sense) things right now. It feels better, at this stage in my life to buy very second hand and then pass it along as our needs/situation change.

Interestingly I've found in my life that often I'll put away something really special only to lose it. For instance, I kept *very few* of dd's baby clothes - just the tiny red merino hat I knit her and she first wore, and a couple very special tops. I put these in a carefully labelled box that my Dp placed in his mother's basement.
When I got pregnant with ds we asked her to mail them to us - and voila! She could not find them.

sigh.

The continual occurence of this is for teaching me a lesson I think. After all I still have dd's sweet head to cherish - and even that I don't own!

Anyway, cleared out tons more clothes/books/papers today. Fit all my clothes into one large cardboard box including work clothes and winter warm stuff. I just have couple pairs of jeans, nursing friendly shirts and one nice pair of pants (for job interview) left out. The rest I'm giving away - or selling if I have the energy.
Next up - packing coats and shoes. I've whittled it down to:
winter jacket
rain coat
lighter casual fall jacket

shoes:
boots
dressy heels
skate shoes
crocs (for work)
and I would usually have a pair of flip flops, but mine broke ($2 thrift find that lasted a year) so I've been going barefoot this summer. I like it!

finally midwife mama to my home-birthed nurslings: Noemi Sakura 16.10.07 & Seder Pádraig 13.7.09 and partner to their lovely daddy
durafemina is offline  
#219 of 230 Old 03-27-2010, 01:44 PM
p.s
 
p.s's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 1,246
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
... i love this thread... partly b/c i am so far from this and there is a part of me that has the idea of a really sparse, simple life.... so, um, let's be kind? we are at different places.
and of course we can disagree, right? But surely we can also learn from each other.

re: the pots, my ds1 was so, and still is, super careful kid. Ds2's nickname is chaos, and that gorgeous tierra negra pot wouldn't last 1 wk in our house. I do though, have a set of Le Creuset that my mom bought for me over 15 y ago. Ages beautifully; probably will still be functional after i am long dead.
p.s is offline  
#220 of 230 Old 04-02-2010, 12:33 AM
Banned
 
accountclosed3's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 11,906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
cool, thanks for sharing.

so, we are deciding whether or not to keep or get rid of our broken table. we could fix it and use it, or we can just sell it and be without a table. such a tough question to answer for us. LOL
accountclosed3 is offline  
#221 of 230 Old 04-02-2010, 02:47 AM
 
clutterwarrior's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,612
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Hi I am new to this site...hope it's OK to just jump into this discussion?

This is a fascinating topic for me, thanks for starting this zoebird.

I haven't had time to read through all the replies so I'm sorry if I am repeating something already said!

I have noticed recently that a lot of my friends are also obsessed with decluttering their houses this year, and as I am also it made me wonder if decluttering is a sign of the times we are living in, since the recession, a desire to live more simply and not be surrounded by material possessions we don't need?

SAHM to three
clutterwarrior is offline  
#222 of 230 Old 04-02-2010, 03:20 AM
Banned
 
accountclosed3's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 11,906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i didn't start it. . .i don't think. LOL

it may well be a situation of the recession.
accountclosed3 is offline  
#223 of 230 Old 04-02-2010, 04:04 AM
 
clutterwarrior's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Australia
Posts: 1,612
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Oh sorry I must have got confused and looked at the name of the last person who had posted.

It seems it was Amys1st who started it...apologies.

SAHM to three
clutterwarrior is offline  
#224 of 230 Old 04-02-2010, 04:38 PM
Banned
 
accountclosed3's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 11,906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
no worries.

i think that many people are simplifying because--having had to cut back due to the recession--they see the rewards of simplifying rather than simply consuming at prior rates.

there's nothing inherently wrong with consuming, but understanding why and what and how much is a good step for defining one's own simplicity. i mean, i consume every week--both goods and services--and i value them highly.
accountclosed3 is offline  
#225 of 230 Old 04-02-2010, 05:57 PM
 
mntnmom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Germany
Posts: 1,835
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I've noticed with my kids, and extended to myself: when we have *more* we tend not to appreciate it as much. I am trying to be more mindful of what I bring into and keep in our home, and pass the rest to someone else. My goal is to have everything in the house be something that I genuinely enjoy, and has meaning to me. I'm a long way from that, but I am learning to be less attached to the security of stuff, and see it all for the transient enjoyment it is.

Mom of 4 aspiring midwife "Friend"ly seeker
mntnmom is offline  
#226 of 230 Old 04-02-2010, 06:07 PM
 
Magelet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: San Francisco Bay Area
Posts: 2,702
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm definitely striving for simplicity. I'm on the wee babysteps of begining. I've taken two shopping bags of clothes and a couple books to out of the closet (like goodwill, different charitible focus, but near work and with a parking lot ). It felt so good!!

It's really hard though. I grew up the child of two pack rats, and with an attitude of "keep everything, as soon as you sell it, you will want/need it", which happened frequently as a child. my parents sold my mom's grandmother's 1/2 size violin, then my sister wanted to play the violin the next year. They sold all their records and two years later I wanted to listen to records only.

I'm just starting to learn to declutter, and trying to be less attached to stuff. The truth of the matter is, I don't need it, and I want to have a simpler life. It's just hard.

Caroline, partner to J, post partum doula, kitchen manager, aspiring midwife, soon to be nursing student, mama to my furbaby, someday a mama to not so furry munchkins, G-d willing
Magelet is offline  
#227 of 230 Old 04-02-2010, 06:31 PM
Banned
 
accountclosed3's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 11,906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
what i have found about pack rats is that they keep ridiculous things, but get rid of things that are worth keeping.

using the example above, an heirloom violin and a record collection--those are things worth keeping, if only for sentimental value. but, they probably had a HUGE box of magazines from 1972, yk?

my ILs are like that. for example, my FIL sold an antique telescope that we wanted to buy (and use). we offered $200 for it (they are weird about money). but, FIL said he "wasn't going to sell it."

well, MIL got in her head that she needed to declutter, so she went to the garage and she put things in a pile to declutter. being passive, FIL allowed the telescope to go into that pile. But there were things that didn't go into that pile--a huge box of knitting needles and yarn (no one knits), a huge box of school papers that my DH and my SIL did as small children, a huge box of various trinkets from holidays (like, those junk spoons or a plate with a name on it or something), and a box of plastic butter spread tubs.

now, FIL sold the telescope to a friend for $75 (without even bothering to offer it to us), and we lost a family heirloom that we actually wanted. but, god forbid we loose those butter tubs!

so, being a pack rat usually means you are getting rid of things that you might actually use, and keeping things that you are unlikely to! and, the pack rat justifies it as "well, no one was using the telescope, but we might need those butter tubs to store stuff!"

it's warped. LOL

so, look to what is actually useful. is an antique violin useful as compared to childhood school papers or butter tubs? does it actually take up less space? answer to both is yes.

crazy pack rats (shakes heads at IL's stupidity).
accountclosed3 is offline  
#228 of 230 Old 04-04-2010, 02:16 AM
 
Om Girl's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: learning about food allergies
Posts: 1,739
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Just wanted to throw out that I'm reading a really amazing book ATM about raising kids simply and it has a lot of research into why "more is bad".

Our Waldorf parenting group is reading it and at first I was really skeptical but now I am totally on board!

It's called "Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier and More Secure Kids" by Kim John Payne

Since reading it I've decided to tackle my own "clutter" before I encourage my girls to tackle theirs, because really it'd be like the pot calling the kettle black!

See my other post in this forum about my progress!

Summer: crafty mama to 2 little girls and wife to Bob
Om Girl is offline  
#229 of 230 Old 04-04-2010, 02:26 AM
Banned
 
accountclosed3's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 11,906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
cool. i will check out that book, in addition to the several others we will be checking out of the library tomorrow!
accountclosed3 is offline  
#230 of 230 Old 04-05-2010, 11:10 AM - Thread Starter
 
Amys1st's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2003
Posts: 8,449
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I think its time for a new thread!


join us at:

http://www.mothering.com/discussions...8#post15263368

Starting fresh, it is easier to stay to the discussion as well as let others join with out getting stuck in a huge thread.

"The true joy of life is the trip. The station is only a dream. It constantly out distances us."
Amys1st is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off