Join Date: Jun 2008
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Mama to Emma (7) and Sarah (5)
~Katie~ married to J, mom to DD- A 13 yrs ,DS- L 7yrs , and my little nursling DD2- R 5yrs.
I get "dumped on" from several fronts.
The back story - I come from one of those families that, while not hoarders, can't give anything away to anyone who isn't a family member. They would never drop stuff at Goodwill or a thirft organization.
Front #1 - Baby stuff from my aunt. This has since stopped as DS grows but when he was a baby, my aunt would give me all sorts of stuff she saved from my baby years (I am 38) and her kids (all over 30)
These treasures are currently boxed and labelled, waiting to go back to her house.
Front #2 - My mom is always showing up with shopping bags full of "treasures" like my sunglasses from 1984, nail brushes, kitchen items, pictures (as in framed art) When I refuse to accept the items or say I will just throw it out, I can see she gets anxious.
It is amusing because if DH sees her coming up the walk with a bag, he is right there at the door telling her that she is not leaving junk at our house.
Front #3 - My dad has a habit of drive-by, stealth drop offs. My parent's marriage exploded in a very bad way and my mom basically walked out, took what she could load up in one trip and told him to throw away the rest.
My dad can't throw things away. It is all related to a refugee childhood. So he would fill up bags of her stuff and put it on my back porch while I was at work. He knew what he was doing was wrong (and told me so) but he couldn't bring himself to throw the stuff out and she refused to go back home to pick it up.
This has nearly stopped, I haven't gotten a surprise bag in a few months.
Oh, my gosh. Do you live in Pennsylvania? You might be related to me. My ILs *cannot* give anything away unless absolutely zero family members, friends, or acquaintances cannot use it - in which case it winds up back in their basement until someone can use it. As a result, their house is...packed.
The biggest contention I have ever had with my dh resulted from us (him, really) trying to help them free up some of the room in their house and volunteering to take a few pieces of (old, broken) furniture "that we might be able to use." They gave it to us, and now my dh can't get rid of it (Plan A) because it would hurt his parents' feelings tremendously. I'm bitter about it because I can't stand the furniture and I feel like he's putting his parents' needs above mine; they live 1000 miles away, it's not like they spend a lot of time here. However, we have an antique sewing machine and a mirrored-dressing table still hanging around our house. They have been banished to the garage. I might bring up trying to sell them to pay the kids' tuition next year.
"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." - Mother Teresa
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