Love Hate Relationship with STUFF - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 09-04-2012, 06:05 PM - Thread Starter
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I think I just need to rant...


I LOVE shopping. Everything I buy for the family is "eco-friendly" (naturally) and economically priced. If something is greatly priced and I know I can make money from it, I will consider bringing it home. This mindset worked well when it was just my honey and we were putting ourselves through college. Now, we have two children and the time and effort to sell and do all this is obviously much more difficult. Now outgrown items or things bought to resell sit around longer than we like.


SO now I don't shop now unless I have to, and only bring home what is essentials. Still, the dance of getting and giving stuff is constant and if I fail to maintain everything as if I was tending a garden things can get out of hand.


I just wish there was a better way to deal with all this stuff, stuff that is essential and loved. I enjoy having good things and my boys having access to educational items, but some times I just wish I could have all the excess housed in another location aside from our home. I guess that is why people rent storage units...but I don't have a units worth of boxes to store. 


Luckily we have a home large enough house our belongs and rotate things but still, when I peek inside areas of the home I am shocked at all we do have. Then I get the urge to purge and then dollar signs and thoughts pop into the head. Oh that's worth money. Oh that will be perfect for x activity next week, etc. ahhh


I guess it's a blessing and a curse. Enough to make me want to sell the home and buy a tiny house and live a super simple life...a few notches above camping style. Then we would really be forced to examine what is truly essential in life. 


Anyone else feel similar?

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#2 of 3 Old 09-05-2012, 04:04 AM
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Our house is about 1500 square feet and feels absolutely enormous and filled with "stuff" to me! Before we moved here we spent a year traveling out of our car and camping and then another six months backpacking the Appalachian Trail. I long for the days when all of my worldly possessions fit in a 55L backpack!


Our house is from the 1920s, and I think one of the things I'm working on is getting more storage furniture. The closets are inadequate and things end up just lying around. We have a 2 year old, so when things are left out, the mess just kind of multiplies. Plus, we both work from home, so we're here all day. When we had jobs outside of the home, it seemed to stay neater.


We have a bad dumpster diving habit. orngtongue.gif For the most part, we're good about only picking things that we're going to refurbish and use. I haven't ever really tried to sell anything I find. However, the "picks" end up sitting around for a while until we get them done. That drives me crazy, even when the finished product turns out nice. 

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#3 of 3 Old 09-05-2012, 08:14 AM
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When I was growing up, we were poor, I had like only few toys and clothes so when I became an adult, I think I started holding on to stuff to make me feel secure and shopping became sort of a therapy. If I saw something on clearance I automatically had to get it because I couldn't pass on a deal, even if it was something I did not need. Target clearance racks were my vice! When I had my ds, I bought him anything he wanted. Since I had so little growing up, I thought he had to have every toy in the store. But something had changed in me recently. I spent few months in another country, a poorer country which is not so materialistic, and I really came back a changed person. I came back feeling that what will make me happy is a simple life, organized minimalistic life and time spent with my kids and hubby. Once I realized this is what I want, the stuff in my life started making me unhappy! Keeping my home organized and clean, always stressing about stuff just being everywhere, always moving the stuff to make space for more stuff. I had an epiphany and started pursuing a new goal: an organized simple life, and organized simple home. Maybe it was the trip, maybe it was the fact that I have 2 kids now... So I am getting rid of stuff and it makes me happy! Shopping actually makes me unhappy now. I am getting rid of anything that I dont' absolutely use and love, and if I absolutely have to buy something, I make sure to get rid of something else. So I guess what I am saying, you have to figure out what makes you happy. If your happiness is a simple life, a simple home with few possessions then go for it. Just get rid of your stuff and don't look back. But if having the stuff makes you feel good, then sure, keep them. But from my own experience, I feel like having a lot of stuff was making me stressed. I was always thinking about having to find more space, or always keeping stuff organized and clean. If I have few belongings, I am at peace. Lots of stuff suddenly made me stressed so I changed. Instead of shopping those clearance racks, I started decluttering. Plus I don't want my kids to learn bad things from me, I dont' want them to grow up thinking that having stuff will give them happiness and peace.

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