Originally Posted by AmyY
OK I'm back
The thing for me is I have two 20-month-olds who require constant attention when they are awake, and an online teaching job that requires at least some attention when they are asleep.
I want to pipe in here b/c I have two 24 month olds who also require constant attention, a full time that has now turned to part-time job out of necessity and a house to take care of. I personally think that if you are trying to raise your children the right way, meaning what keeps them and your family the happiest and most well-adjusted, that in itself is a full time 24/7 job. Anyways, I moved our whole house, packed it myself with a tiny bit of help from my girlfriends, dealt with my dh's nervous breakdown and then ensuing physical and mental and emotional problems, and guess what, I still have boxes hiding in a basement room waiting to be unpacked 1-1/2 years later. And, you know what I say? SO WHAT? They can wait until my babies grow up and move away for all I care. I am raising my babies first, and decluttering and cleaning second.
I LOVE flylady because she is gentle and kind and anything I don't feel like doing is discarded and never thought of again. She is not the messiah and I don't treat anyone like the messiah. She's just a kind-hearted person out to help others and make a decent living in the process. I feel inspired by a bunch of the stories and even when I do absolutely nothing to declutter, I feel happy that I have a shiny sink and counter top (that hasn't happened since I got married 7 years ago, my dh is a SLOB although I love him anyway).
Well, I think I'm tired because I'm doing so much! I also nursed a long time, but they are weaned now. That is tiring on a 40 yo body. And, heck, I'm 40! I'm supposed to be tired at night by this age! Yes, I need more physical exercise, I gained 80 lbs. with the twins pregnancy that I have YET to lose (although every day I say today is the day and then I procrastinate the eating-less thing) and I think I have some vitamin deficiencies from the twins pregnancy. A woman's body can only give so much to the little darlings without breaking down and declaring a sabbath (meaning that I need to rest). But mother's of twins NEVER get a sabbath, at least I don't. No one takes care of my twins, no one cooks dinner, no one cleans a bathroom in this house except me. But I see 2 future helpers that I made myself and they are the happiest little creatures I have ever laid eyes on and I am proud of me for making them that way and will continue to do it no matter how tired I get and I think all good mothers feel the same way, but maybe they aren't dealing with twins and I have heard from mothers who have both twins and singletons that the twins were so much more work than the singletons. It only makes sense. Can you be easier on yourself and just wait it out? When the twins are older and more independent you might miss their needing you constantly. I know I will, I just love the little dinosaurs I have running around and pulling everything off the shelf.
If you aren't sleeping thru the night yet, and I am not yet b/c of the twins waking up once per night, but at different times, then that is a major cause of tiredness too. It'll pass and you will be back on top of your game and the house will look great when the kids are at school (even if it happens to be college). Time flies quickly, enjoy as much as you can and don't feel guilty about anything else, if you are being a great mother, that's the only important job right now.
YOu have a lot of intrusion on your privacy from well-meaning and helpful people that love you, but you still are missing your privacy. Soon you will not need so much help and then you will have your house back to yourself and can breath a private sigh of relief.