Dh never complains about the status of the house, but he made one minor comment today that I broke down and cried about later. He wanted to have someone over, but said he decided against it because he said he didn't want anyone to see his house looking the way it did. At the time there was a pile of folded/but waiting to be ironed laundry in the L.R. Truthfully the white kitchen floor looked like a dirty rainbow from all the juice/ice-ee spills from last week/weekend and the kids toys needed picking up. I know these were all jobs that needed to be tended too badly and I have been putting them off mostly due to exhaustion, aching hip, the heat; but they were not things it would take more than 15mins to complete. Dh didn't really say anything in a rude way...just that he highlighted the eye sores that were already bothering me, but I just haven't been able to tackle yet; well I killed myself to clean it all up after he made the comment.
I'm venting cause I just want to know how everyone maintains a schedule to keep things in order. I know in general I have a hard time just getting a basic routine going for myself and its a good day when I can cook 3 meals in a timely manner wash the dishes before bed and at least do 1 homeschooling activity with the kids. Nevermind cleaning any of the messes they've made during the day, handwashing some clothes to keep down on the laundry for the laundromat, running errands, getting the kids out to play, or helping dh with his home based business; all the other things that need to happen during the day as well. There used to be a time when I hardly ever cleaned..mainly due to being depressed but also in part to my perfectionnism. Like I'm a fanatic at everything being sanitary when I clean e.g the mop, my rags/sponge. So if I run out of bleach then I can't clean thing x until I buy bleach to clean it properly. Many times this is what happens to me. In general I am slow, but I'm thorough, I can't just clean up something quickly and do the job half-a--, this how I think of it in my mind. Like my mother always had a way of bagging things up or doing a once over if she had to straighten things in a hurry..then that bag would never get sorted and just go into the pile with other junk. So I can't do this..when I do anything it has to be thorough, done right or I will just ignore the stains on the floor or that small stack of mail(cause I can't sort, throw away and file all at that moment) until it finally gets to a point I absolutely can't stand. Like that kitchen floor today, I had honestly just put out the mop and floor cleaner right before dh made the comment. This morning I looked at it and finally said so what if you can't do ure heavy disinfecting, it looks bad, even if u just throw some soapy water on the stains it'll look better. Its like dh's comment made me feel like the whole house was a wreck cause of how the kitchen floor looked. I said to him I don't think the house looks that bad so could please just say what specifically makes u feel like you can't have anyone over. So he said the kitchen, I just responded that I was going to get on that right at the moment.
I hope that no one is reading this thinking..why doesn't ure dh clean up or help you. That's kind of a whole nother discussion, not that my dh thinks the cleaning is a woman's job; he just doesn't clean and like I said in the beginning he never complains either, I can honestly say this was the 1st comment he's made for 2005. It just hit me hard, kwim?
married to DH mom to 3 boys, 1 girl