Yesterday I discovered this forum, quite by accident. I have been feeling so overwhelemd and really kind of depressed about the state of my house. It's a never-ending battle of picking itup just to see it be destroyed by lack of motivation and destructive children. Sometimes it just makesme want to cry. I have spent the last two weeks trying desperatly to clean my way out of my big bedroom. It is rilled with bags, baskets and boxes of clothes to be sorted, donated, and re-stored. My oldest son's room is a constant pit. We finally got it cleaned up and started organizing and in no time flat, it was a disaster again. It all just brings me down. I'm a happy, upbeat, optimistic person. Except when it comes to my house. It has grey carpets and white walls. Almost no decor, it doesn't feel like home. Yesterday I came home and as always saw the mess we'd left and it was just depressing.
Then I got on MDC and posted to a thread about feeling trapped. Somehow I happened upon this forum. I literally read this forum for hours, off and on, last night. I found such hope! what made me feel so good was knowing there were so many other people who felot the same as I and who live the same as I. It was truly inspiring. I Found inspiration also in stoires of people who had risen above the house-chaos. As I was reading, I found renewed energy to tackle my house. I need a week,a solid week, to clean out, organize, all that stuff. And then I decorate to make it feel morecomfortable to me. By making it feel happy, I hope to feel morehappy about keeping it up.
I'm active,but I'm lazy when it comes to the house. Mainlybecause it can overwhelm so fast. I am not by nature an organized person, which is okay with me, however, I see how thehouse effects me so much now. After spending so much time reading this forum, often on the verge of tears, I am completely ready to do this. I am rady to tackle my beast (house) and motivated to keep it up, even if only a little. We rarely have company and nobody's ever going to "just drop by", so I', not too worried about that (though I'd love it if eitherhappened!) so I am doing this for me. For my sanity, my peacveof mine. For the exposure of having a less clutterd home to my boys. To show my husband that yes, I can do it, even if he laughs at the notion of putting "Tara" and "organized" int he same sentence. To show my MIL that I can keep up the house and the kids (she's a psycho neat-freak over-cleaner...I'm serious, she cleans too much). I wantmy house to be free and full of happinessand I know that when the house is better kept ane lesscluttered, the people living within are happier. I want that badly. I want my house to be warm, inviting, and less ofwhat it is now.
So thank-you to this forum. Thank you for anyone who has posted in it. Thank you all for inspiring me and bringing me hope. I am humbly appreciative.