does the state of the HOUSE = how you feel - Mothering Forums
View Poll Results: Does the state of your house = your mental or emotional state?
NO don't be silly 4 2.04%
YES if the house is a mess i feel overwelemd, anxious, etc -- keeping it clean helps my mood 166 84.69%
YES -- if i feel bad i let the hosue go -- look at my house and see how i feel 20 10.20%
OTHER -- not sure, but there is always an OTHER 6 3.06%
Voters: 196. You may not vote on this poll

Forum Jump: 
Reply
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 02:12 PM - Thread Starter
 
Momma Aimee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: deep in South Texas and ready to go home
Posts: 9,439
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i know for me if i let the house go, i feel crumy. If i can keep on top of the house, then i feel better no matter what .....

I have seen a number of other moms comment on this as well

Also I know some where it is the other way around -- if the house is a mess it is BECAUSE they are in a slump personally

(where as for me the house can put me in a slump)

thoughts??

Is this true for a lot of people?

AImee

MY FIRST EVER POLL

Aimee + Scott = Theodore Roosevelt (11/05) and 23 months later Charles Abraham (10/07)....praying for a little sister; the search starts May 2014
Momma Aimee is offline  
#2 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 02:15 PM
 
Teensy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 1,737
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Absolutely!

Tanya
Mom to John (age 11), James (age 9) & Katherine (age 5)
Teensy is offline  
#3 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 02:19 PM
 
mikaela's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Souderton, PA
Posts: 400
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
The state of the house and my mood are definitely connected, though I don't know which one comes first. I think it's one of those "the chicken or the egg" things
mikaela is offline  
#4 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 02:29 PM
 
ananas's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 3,993
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Absolutely! If my house is a mess or is cluttered, my mind feels cluttered. I feel overwhelmed and anxious, which leads to feeling depressed.

Newly single, chronically sleep deprived mama to my little wild thang wild.gif, born 11/17/12 

fly-by-nursing1.gif

ananas is offline  
#5 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 02:34 PM
 
the_lissa's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Southern Ontario, Canada
Posts: 13,253
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
If my house gets messy, I get very overwhelmed.

It's not a matter of me letting it go or keeping up though. My partner and I share housework. When we are cleaning when it is really cluttered or messy, I get so overwhelmed, and have to ask my partner to give me one thing to do at a time or else I get to overwhelmed and discouraged and don't want to do anything.

Jam 7, Peanut Butter 5, and Bread 2.

the_lissa is offline  
#6 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 02:56 PM
 
MommytoTwo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Actually, its Mommy to Three now
Posts: 3,925
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Absolutely. The advice about not worrying about your house when you have kids.... not for me. When my house is a wreck I am a wreck. We are all happier when its relatively clean and picked up.
MommytoTwo is offline  
#7 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 03:06 PM
Banned
 
accountclosed3's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 11,906
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
i put "other."

i fiind that when my house is basicly clean and organized, i tend to be calmer overall.

when it's a little messy, it's not so much of a problem.

but when it gets really messy, it can feel overwhelming to try and clean it up. then, i get anxious--because i feel like i don't have enough time to clean/organize.

my husband said that we can hire an organizer/cleaning crew this spring. my mom said she would pitch in some money for it!
accountclosed3 is offline  
#8 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 03:08 PM
 
broodymama's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Watching the rain
Posts: 7,373
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
Both YES options for me! If I feel bad (like I have for the past week or two) then I let the house go and it really reflects how I feel. Also, if the house gets cluttered and dirty then it can cause me to feel anxious, snappy and irritable.

Chaotic uc.jpg homeschool.gif mama to 5 plus a bonus one on the way.  stork-suprise.gif

chicken3.gif

broodymama is offline  
#9 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 03:39 PM
 
LaLaLuna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: here, there & everywhere
Posts: 1,286
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by zoebird View Post
my husband said that we can hire an organizer/cleaning crew this spring. my mom said she would pitch in some money for it!

Wow- that is brilliant!! What an awesome gift.

I have the double whammy of bad house=bad mood and then also being overwhelmed by work fatigue/ high energy boys. I have a secret little pipe dream of living by myself in a little bungalow... with only the possessions I truly need plus a big bookshelf. sigh.
LaLaLuna is offline  
#10 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 03:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
Momma Aimee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: deep in South Texas and ready to go home
Posts: 9,439
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
my husband said that we can hire an organizer/cleaning crew this spring. my mom said she would pitch in some money for it!
do we have a jeaous smile

Aimee + Scott = Theodore Roosevelt (11/05) and 23 months later Charles Abraham (10/07)....praying for a little sister; the search starts May 2014
Momma Aimee is offline  
#11 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 04:12 PM
 
sweetfeet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Dayton
Posts: 4,444
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Yes, absolutely. For me visual clutter=mental clutter. I feel anxious and moody if I don't keep up on decluttering and keeping things tidy.
sweetfeet is offline  
#12 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 04:19 PM
 
Semi_Crunchy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: CrazyTown
Posts: 257
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I can't even go to sleep knowing that there is a mess...I just can't relax and get comfortable! I guess that is because its on my mind of things that need to be done.
Semi_Crunchy is offline  
#13 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 04:19 PM
 
katheek77's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 4,285
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Not really...if it's at an extreme (either) there's probably a problem, but, otherwise, it goes anywhere from nearly perfect to "clear a path", without much effect. I've decluttered to the point, though, that even when DD goes on a tear, it's hard to get *too* messy anymore.

I do like decluttering projects, though, so I usually feel happier when those are done, even if the house is messier...Ex: Last night, I put all our DVDs in a DVD holder, and got rid of their cases...but, b/c I spent so much time on that, the house was wrecked by DD at the end. I also like to cook/bake, so, the house sometimes gets *messier* when I'm happier (b/c I'm busy enjoying other things).
katheek77 is offline  
#14 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 05:38 PM
 
ekortering's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Posts: 284
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
ITA!!! The one room in my house that needs some major work is my sewing room. But I'm scared to go in there b/c of what it will do to my mind ... muwahaha!
ekortering is offline  
#15 of 44 Old 12-13-2007, 06:48 PM
 
kissum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 1,119
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Yes, it totally stressed me out to wake up or come home to a messy house. It took me a long time to figure that out, though. If I don't have time in the morning to get my house clean, I always stop at home before picking up DD so that i have a clean house when we are in for the night.

Ali, mama to my amazing Arabella 1/14/06
Newly married to Patrick love.gif Expecting someone new in April!
kissum is offline  
#16 of 44 Old 12-14-2007, 03:16 PM
 
EdnaMarie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 6,148
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Yes, hence my current slump. I'm joining flylady's list today. Like another e-mail per day is going to help me get my house in order.

It's not that the stay-at-home-parent gets to stay home with the kids. The kids get to stay home with a parent. Lucky Mom to DD1 (4 y) and DD2 (18 mo), Wife to Mercenary Dad
EdnaMarie is offline  
#17 of 44 Old 12-14-2007, 03:28 PM
 
sabrinat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,751
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by ananas View Post
Absolutely! If my house is a mess or is cluttered, my mind feels cluttered. I feel overwhelmed and anxious, which leads to feeling depressed.
That's how I feel exactly.

Sabrina , mom to 4 fab kids!

sabrinat is offline  
#18 of 44 Old 12-14-2007, 04:35 PM
 
chinaKat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 2,263
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by MommytoTwo View Post
Absolutely. The advice about not worrying about your house when you have kids.... not for me. When my house is a wreck I am a wreck. We are all happier when its relatively clean and picked up.
Yep, exactly this. If there is clutter all over the place I have been known to absolutely lose my shit.
chinaKat is offline  
#19 of 44 Old 12-15-2007, 03:16 PM
 
sapphire_chan's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 27,779
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Other, both choices 2 and 3. If I let the house get below a certain minimal level of clean I get freaked out and if I'm stressed for some other reason I have a tendency to let the house go.

Goal for winterbreak: getting the house to a point where school stress doesn't cause the house to fall apart.
sapphire_chan is offline  
#20 of 44 Old 12-15-2007, 05:57 PM
 
mamabearsoblessed's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: nursing about the foothills
Posts: 3,139
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by ananas View Post
Absolutely! If my house is a mess or is cluttered, my mind feels cluttered. I feel overwhelmed and anxious, which leads to feeling depressed.
EXACTLY!!

natural birthin', baby catchin', cloth addicted, intactalactavist mama of 12/00, 6/03, 10/07, 8/10 & our angelcubs three
mamabearsoblessed is offline  
#21 of 44 Old 12-15-2007, 10:05 PM
 
it's just apples's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 197
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by sapphire_chan View Post
Other, both choices 2 and 3. If I let the house get below a certain minimal level of clean I get freaked out and if I'm stressed for some other reason I have a tendency to let the house go.

Me too. Unfortunately it can become a vicious cycle- The house gets messy so I feel bad, I feel bad so I don't want to clean, the house gets worse and I feel worse, I feel worse and I don't want to clean....:
it's just apples is offline  
#22 of 44 Old 12-15-2007, 10:15 PM
 
mamajama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Canada
Posts: 6,107
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by sapphire_chan View Post
Goal for winterbreak: getting the house to a point where school stress doesn't cause the house to fall apart.
I'm with ya.

Mine's a chicken-or-the-egg scenerio too. I know that state of my brain and the state of my houe are definitely connected. Although, I'm pretty happy in general right now and my house is in shambles, which is my only real source of stress. I'm going batty.
mamajama is offline  
#23 of 44 Old 12-16-2007, 04:42 PM
 
CaliMommie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: The Boondocks
Posts: 3,764
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mikaela View Post
The state of the house and my mood are definitely connected, though I don't know which one comes first. I think it's one of those "the chicken or the egg" things
: I know that when I am overwhelmed or stressed my house seems to be messier, but I also know that when my house is messy it makes me stressed and anxious. So I'm not always sure which happens first.

.

CaliMommie is offline  
#24 of 44 Old 12-16-2007, 04:46 PM
 
rmzbm's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: NC
Posts: 16,378
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Having the house messy or cluttered FOR SURE makes me edgy & miserable.

~Marie : Mom to DS(11), DS(10), DD(8), DD(4), DD(2), & Happily Married to DH 12 yrs.!
rmzbm is offline  
#25 of 44 Old 12-16-2007, 04:56 PM
 
AidynElyMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: In the land of lilacs, Washington
Posts: 310
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I think mine is house before mood. When I'm in a bad mood, I will still clean and normally that makes me feel better, and when the house is in a mess and for some reason I can't get it clean (cranky kids, errands, etc), I tend to be much more harried as I go about things knowing that there is a messy house waiting for me.
AidynElyMama is offline  
#26 of 44 Old 12-16-2007, 05:21 PM
 
CurlyTop's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Valley of the Heart's Delight
Posts: 684
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I feel awfully anxious when my house is a mess. I hate clutter. Unlike those who can't rest when it's a mess, though, I get almost paralyzed that it will Never Be Tidy and just go to bed miserable.
CurlyTop is offline  
#27 of 44 Old 12-17-2007, 12:53 PM
 
UUMom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2002
Posts: 9,777
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I would say other.

I like things reasonably tidy, but I want the kids to play and be comfortable in their own home. So certain things don't bother me, and I find it feels more like a home.

Papers on every surface is a bother to me. A block stable with little horses in the living room, even if I have to step oer it, makes me feel warm. Unfolded clothing on the sofa for too long is a problem. lol

I don't like dirty floors and dirty toilets. Those get vaccumed and cleaned. Dust bothers me.

But I try not to let normal stuff get to me. It's better for my kids to have a mother who can sit down and play Boggle even if the house isn't perfect, than to have me fussing at them to keep the house from looking like 6 people live and work here.
UUMom is offline  
#28 of 44 Old 12-17-2007, 11:57 PM
 
AutumnMelody's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 389
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by it's just apples View Post
Me too. Unfortunately it can become a vicious cycle- The house gets messy so I feel bad, I feel bad so I don't want to clean, the house gets worse and I feel worse, I feel worse and I don't want to clean....:
That's exactly what happens to me. Pretty much constantly.
AutumnMelody is offline  
#29 of 44 Old 12-18-2007, 01:52 AM
 
3rosebuds's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 283
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by it's just apples View Post
Unfortunately it can become a vicious cycle- The house gets messy so I feel bad, I feel bad so I don't want to clean, the house gets worse and I feel worse, I feel worse and I don't want to clean....:
This is how I am, too. I am a much more pleasant person to be around when my house is clean.

full-time student and single mommy to 3 fabulous little guys!
3rosebuds is offline  
#30 of 44 Old 12-18-2007, 06:34 AM
 
BinahYeteirah's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: Australia
Posts: 3,163
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I definitely find that the cleanliness of the house affects my mood. I work at home as well, so it is even more important for my house to be organized and looking good. If I don't start the morning with clean spaces, then I fee like I am catching up all day; my regular tasks are so much harder to do!
BinahYeteirah is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off