Join Date: Nov 2007
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"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless." - Mother Teresa
After 4 m/c, our is here!
|When they fill up, I start putting things in the middle of the floor|
Homeschooling mama to 6 year old DD.
These two statements don't compute. I can't image anyone who sells antiques for a living thinking that National Geographics would have any value.
Sigh,, I can so relate to you all. My DH is a neat tidy person himself but he cannot bear what he calls "waste", so he can't stand to get rid of anything that might still have use in it.
BUT he is changing a little at last... (after 32 years of marriage, and my nagging, and despairing, and yes, SachaMacina, a few tantrums over the years I admit, none of which ever had any effect). LOL
BUT there is hope: Here are some things I've tried that worked, kind of :
I told him I was going to go to relaxation/massage classes because I was stressing about his junkyard. "Oh, and by the way, darling, they only cost $20 a session."
"Are you really stressed THAT much about a bit of junk?"
(We had a big yard clean up that weekend.)
Got some of Don Aslett's and Peter Walsh's books and left them in the loo, making sure there were no motorbike or car magazines in there first. Kind of forced reading. Worked for me. He read them!
Place the offending piece of junk where it is the most inconvenient... where he has to crawl/climb/fall/trip over it, and tell him there's no room for it anywhere else. Best place is right where he has to open his car door
This worked for me with a china cabinet I had no use for and DH couldn't bear to part with because ... well, just because. He ended up telling me to get rid of the wretched thing, and never realised why it bothered him so much. Devious and subtle works sometimes but so does a potential ding in the car door
Example works a bit. When I de-cluttered all my stuff he actually asked me to help him start on his too. I didn't get rid of anything that was specifically "his", but whenever he protested about whatever I was getting rid of I'd just hand it to him, and say, "here, do what you want with it, but I dont' want it". After looking kind of lost, and muttering about the waste, he'd either hand it back or take it to the shed (let's not go there just now) LOL
But actually as he saw the house looking neat as a pin, it made his shed look worse and worse by contrast, and now he's making serious noises about cleaning that out.
DH realises I'm manipulating him, but doesn't seem to mind, because he knows he can't manipulate himself, so he still loves me.
|I actually hide what I donate to Goodwill. Not that anyone in the house ever seems to miss it once it is gone!|
Elena ~ loving mom to Alexander 8 Christopher 5.