I know what you mean with feeling broken, and med changes really exacerbate that when you aren't sure how you're doing moment to moment. Relying on the meds is scary, hard to feel totally in control.
What comes to mind though is a thing form Scott Noelle's daily groove - I swear those little daily emails have brought me so much peace.
One of them was about a sticking speedometer where he kept trusting the speedometer to tell him how fast he was going and he kept checking it but feeling like something wasn't right until he realized it was sticking and so he just had to follow what he knew by his senses etc. of what it *felt* like to be going the right speed, instead of this mechanical measure.
My point being, sometimes hyper focusing on the meds can make it hard to let yourself feel ok, or accept yourself when you feel less ok.
I have been through soooo many med changes, trying to find the right cocktail - I have bipolar with psychotic features and borderline personality. It took years of being in & out of the hospital and failing med combos to finally find one that worked for longer than 6 months. Now I'm at ummm a year and 5 months!!! woohoo! it's more than totally a record for me! I'll go through rough spots, but more and more I realize that I can do other things to really help myself besides the meds and I feel much more whole.
I'm not saying that is where you are right now, I just wanted to give you some hope that the broken thing can heal