We had to take DH to the ER last night. We've been trying for ages to find him mental health help, but everyplace we called turned us down. We have Medicaid and nobody takes it. We kept contacting crisis centers and even the Medicaid HMO itself and they give us lists of people that definitely take it, but we called the entire list each time and every single place on it says they don't take it and haven't for a while. DH was going to lose his mind if we didn't get help soon, so our only option was going to the ER. We exaggerated and told them he was actively suicidal rather than just considering it so they'd admit him.
Things have been so bad lately and I don't know how much this is going to help, but it has to be better than nothing. He needs to be on anti-psychotics and anti-depressants and all he's had has been Depakote and it's just not enough.
On top of all that, I don't know what I'm going to do if he's not out of the hospital by Monday night. I just finished my first week at a new job near the house we're about to move to, which is 90 minutes away. DS has been staying at the old house with DH to finish the school year and I've been staying at the new house with DD. If DH is still in the hospital on Monday night, DS will have to come with me, missing school, and either stay with his dad or MIL so I can go to work. Then when DH does get out of the hospital, I'll have to drive for hours to bring DS and DH back to the old house and then drive me and DD back to the new one for work the next day.
I'm so sorry. Do you have more news on his release date? Hopefully he will get some help and follow up treatment. It sounds like you did the right thing, but that doesn't make it easy. Could you go stay with your MIL so you have some help? Or would that be more stressful :) Sending good energy your way.....
We're hoping he'll get out tomorrow, which would be great because DS wouldn't have to miss school. I talked to his nurse today about changing his meds and adding to what he's been taking. They're also going to help us find someone who will take Medicaid.
I don't think this has helped him at all. I talked to him on the phone and he said it was everything he thought it was going to be, which is jail for crazies. He said they put him in a room with a semi-violent roommate, they won't let the kids visit, and it's just babysitting to make sure he doesn't kill himself or anybody else. Mental health programs in this country are nonexistent, especially for public assistance. The county clinic is a joke. And even going to the hospital isn't helpful. I don't know what we can do to help him but I don't know how much longer I can keep it together and keep going.
That is horrible. I have a family member with mental illness and this kind of scenario is one of my worst fears. I hope you're able to get the help you need. Shame on our country for not doing more to help people with mental illness.
SAHM to 6.5yo DS and 4yo DD. PCOS with two early m/cs. Married 8 yrs. Certified birth doula, writer, editor.
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