Hello all, I've read with interest the updates to this thread but didn't quite know how to respond. But here goes an attempt at least...
First, I'm sorry any of you are going through this
, it sounds like you have some good tools, though I'm sorry your change in treatment threw you for an unexpected loop & the nurse was unkind/incompetent. Have things stabilized for you?
After taking to heart some of the suggestions here, I have found some profound peace, at least for now. On the most practical level, I've made sure I'm eating enough good (healthy) fats. I eat avocados, butter, ghee, coconut oil, cod liver oil--it really makes a big difference for me. I've also worked on balancing my hormones (did a short cleanse, Whole30, supplements, got treatment for sub-clinical hypothyroidism, etc.).
Those things have made a difference for me but the biggest thing is that I've taken the development of my spiritual self seriously. For me, that led me to Buddhism & reading a lot of work by Buddhist teachers. Thich Nhat Hanh's "No Death, No Fear" helped me to get out from under my fear of death (I think it's a good read whether or not you are Buddhist--he has a way of speaking to people of all faiths). I have not had any panic attacks recently & am able to support my good friend with cancer without turning to my own worst fears. For me, I think I was right in my original post when I wrote that my troubles came from my fear of death. I needed a spiritual & intellectual understanding of my own mortality to get some distance from my anxiety. I have some of that now & it's so much better.
I also worked with a therapist to learn to cope with the miscarriages (I had 2 more after I initially posted) & fertility struggles, which helped too.
Death is probably not the origin story for all anxiety, but I don't think I'm alone either. I hope this helps a little. I'm happy to discuss more, too!
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