My "I ain't gonna get depressed this winter" thread. Please join! - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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#121 of 364 Old 01-09-2006, 09:22 PM
 
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I am joining in too. I am fighting with all my might to beat off the depression monster. If I can get through Jan. I will be okay.

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#122 of 364 Old 01-09-2006, 09:40 PM
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I will admit to singing that song when I saw the words, so you helped ME at least! ANd I've read that 3 cups of green tea a day will help. I've been trying it and it seems too. I should be having a cup now.

I better up to 3 cups then! I'm at two huge mugs as is..............I injured my flipping arm today doing my workout........overdid the upper body part (aerobic) and wow am I feeling it tonight...BAD MUSCLE PAIN!

And to Ruthla....I've followed some of your posts....welcome. I'm sorry your depressed..............(((hugs))))
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#123 of 364 Old 01-09-2006, 09:43 PM - Thread Starter
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Ruthla, it's NEVER too late. Doing something, anything, usually makes me feel better. Not cured! But a bit better.

If you read back over the thread, you'll see we've sharqed a bunch of ideas for helping us to survive the bad spots. You and Purplegirl might want to try a few.

Much of it is the stuff you always hear, anyway. But it's the stuff that helps. So, today, RIGHT NOW, get some exercise! Dance with a babe, do jumping jacks or go ut and run circles around your house. Blood pumping is a sure help.

We've all agreed, I think, that getting outside, even if the weather is uncooperative, helps. Drink lots of water, eat healthy.

How about a few less things?

Our personal depression survey suggested hot cocoa as being a big help. Make yourself a really good, creamy mug. And if you (or anyone else, so far only ONE person has taken me up on it) PM me with your IRL addy, I'm offering up homemade cocoa mix to anyone who'd like it. Probably going out next week, so COME ON!

Bubbles and balloons are too big depression lifters. Buy some. Go out side. Blow them in the tub.

TAKE A TUB! A long hot soak, with freaking candles and bubbles and everything. Maybe even a mug of cocoa!

Ok, the strangest, and my own two personal favorites,: Sing really loud. Barneys song, a few posts above, could be a starting spot! We had other suggestions throughout. And...put a pencil above your top lip, then curl your lip and hold it there....why? Ha, read the rest of the thread. Go on, it'll be good for you.


There are lots of other great ideas.


Now, wanna sit down one day soon, and have a cup of cocoa made by a stranger you KNOW really cares, someone out in cyberspace sending you a chocolate hug? (My IRL info is linked through my siggy and business. I'm not going to mail ya all poison or anything! Or even put you on any mailing lists. I don't have one! )

THis all happens to be working for me, so far. I keep waiting, but so far so good. I have been doing a bunch of stuff to help, so maybe it's working.


Who knows a cheap source of Evening Primrose Oil?
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#124 of 364 Old 01-09-2006, 10:20 PM
 
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I just had a cup of roobios chai tea with raw honey. wow did that make me feel good. tomorrow i will do the hot chocolate.

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#125 of 364 Old 01-10-2006, 06:57 PM - Thread Starter
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Mmm, I love alll hot drinks, except coffee.

i just had a big mug of Hot cocoa and spiked it with Brandy! THAT was yummy!




And I feel so nice.
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#126 of 364 Old 01-10-2006, 07:08 PM
 
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i'll pm for cocoa mix! yeah, i bet it is really good!!
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#127 of 364 Old 01-10-2006, 07:28 PM
 
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hot cocoa sounds yummy but I can't have dairy (except goat's milk.) The mix Red has is probably not something I should be drinking.

I think I'll pick up a few boxes of carob rice dream next time I go to the store- microwave them for a hot "chocolate like drink" that agrees with me!

Ruth, single mommy to Leah, 19, Hannah, 18, and Jack, 12
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#128 of 364 Old 01-10-2006, 08:06 PM
 
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Welcome to the newcomers.

I'm not doing so well these last couple of days. Struggling with all those heavy personal issues again, and it's bringing me down. I *have* managed to get a workout in every day except today, so that has helped. And I treated myself to a non-fat white mocha at Starbucks today... but

Still reading though.
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#129 of 364 Old 01-10-2006, 08:34 PM
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Originally Posted by APMom98
Welcome to the newcomers.

I'm not doing so well these last couple of days. Struggling with all those heavy personal issues again, and it's bringing me down. I *have* managed to get a workout in every day except today, so that has helped. And I treated myself to a non-fat white mocha at Starbucks today... but

Still reading though.

APMom. I'm sorry you're dealing with heavy things.....keep up the exercise even in small amounts. We're here for you.
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#130 of 364 Old 01-10-2006, 09:34 PM
 
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APmom

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#131 of 364 Old 01-11-2006, 06:21 AM
 
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I'm really enjoying this thread!!

That said, I hope it's okay if I ask a question which might cause a slight turn in conversation...

I've noticed from other's posts that I'm not the only one who has 'issues' to deal with... well mine boils down to being able to love myself, be nice to myself, not punish myself, etc. even though I'm not perfect... so I know in my head that I can never be perfect and that I don't need to be, but in my heart.... well... I'm often punishing myself for not doing and being what I think I ought to do/be, mainly by doing things that I don't want to do, and by not doing those things that I do want to do... (specifically I want/ need to lose weight.. know I can... yah I know, there's a separate thread for that, but for me it seems to be so interelated...

I hope it's okay that I brought this up here.. I'm begining to feel comfortable with you guys.. I feel like we visit and almost once a day.. so please do share all thoughts. THANKS!
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#132 of 364 Old 01-11-2006, 11:23 AM
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Originally Posted by Jewish Mom
I'm really enjoying this thread!!

That said, I hope it's okay if I ask a question which might cause a slight turn in conversation...

I've noticed from other's posts that I'm not the only one who has 'issues' to deal with... well mine boils down to being able to love myself, be nice to myself, not punish myself, etc. even though I'm not perfect... so I know in my head that I can never be perfect and that I don't need to be, but in my heart.... well... I'm often punishing myself for not doing and being what I think I ought to do/be, mainly by doing things that I don't want to do, and by not doing those things that I do want to do... (specifically I want/ need to lose weight.. know I can... yah I know, there's a separate thread for that, but for me it seems to be so interelated...

I hope it's okay that I brought this up here.. I'm begining to feel comfortable with you guys.. I feel like we visit and almost once a day.. so please do share all thoughts. THANKS!
Hi mama

I think many of us have similar issues to deal with here, hence the thread being here. Some have more serious issues and others have smaller ones. I think you're on the right path. Positive self talk is a must! Have you tried to get out and walk once a day, even just ten minutes? Maybe do some of the things we've listed here? Listen to good music, read a page of a great book? Take a hot bath..........light a fave candle?

These things line up with being good to yourself...a good start. Writing a journal may help you as well.........then you can re-read your issues and get a hold of what needs changing/altering/ work etc.

I am sure the other mamas can help more. I've had a history with Anxiety/mild depression and am fine now but took years of positive self talk (I never used meds, they messed me up) and journaling to work through it all.

(((hugs))
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#133 of 364 Old 01-11-2006, 12:06 PM
 
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i'm struggling with these too!

I have found Louise hay's books really really helpful but it has taken me a long time to get my mind around what she has to say ( some of it made sense from the get go but I have had to work with the rest)
but one exercise she says to do is to say "I approve of myself" to yourself, about a thousand times a day. Everytime you think of it. Also " I love myself" and " I accept myself" and she says if you feel resistance, that's OK, just keep trying. Actually I think feeling resistance may be the sign that I really need to say it so I can start to believe it!
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#134 of 364 Old 01-11-2006, 11:24 PM - Thread Starter
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APMom98 !
You sound like you're really maiking the effort! Are you getting any sunlight or outdoor time? Maybe a vitamin? Iron?

It might be worth condsidering this winter an experiment. Can you try some different things? Giving up caffiene, or jogging or meditation? What supplements might help? (Iron, vit c, e, St. John's Wort, a multi-vit, extra water, maybe a nap in the afternoons or taking a class for somthing you'd like to do? Maybe replacing your light bulbs wiht higher wattage ones?

And for the 'real' issues, do you have someone to talk tehm over with? SOmeone you can trust wiht your heart? When things get tough for me a find even a so-so counselor is better than a friend, because they ask a different type of question, make me think about the situation differently.


Ruthla, I'm searching for some nice chocolate for the cocoa. When I find it, I could send you a bit of that and you could mix up your own . (Try Silk soy milk, sugar and cocoa. Not bad!)


Starbucks has NON FAT?????? Be still my heart.


Jewish Mom, you are what you believe! This is a new thought to me. I have (and there is a thread devoted to this is personal growth) only recently discovered that my belief that I would ALWAYS be poor, was keeping us that way.Years ago I found out that how I saw myself affected how others saw me, but I never realized how much of a difference it could make!

Do spend time every day telling yourself you are whatever you want to be. YOU ARE. Not you will become.

I really feel I'm starting to get to know folks too! THis is cool.


And I thnk it's fine if we discuss WHAT we feel sad or depressed about, and get some sympathy, or empathy and understanding. We probably all could use somewhere to let it out. (I, on the other hand, have no intention of visiting the bad place' while I'm holding it together so well. All I have to do is START thinking about sad stuff this time of year and I'm a goner!) But I also think it's valuable to remember that no matter what affects us, we are NOT going to let it take us over.


janebug, the first time I tried any affirmation I felt incredible resistance. But I jsut figure, the harder it is to believe, the more I NEED to believe it!!!

























(OT, but does this remind anyone else of Nixon? )
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#135 of 364 Old 01-12-2006, 01:27 AM
 
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(OT, but does this remind anyone else of Nixon?
Yes Thanks for the laugh
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#136 of 364 Old 01-12-2006, 02:14 PM
 
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I just did my 30 minute Tae Bo for the first time! DD was napping and I got a little work out in! My first post partum workout I feel great though. Man, that Billy Blanks has some moves, and muscles!! I'm assuming it gets easier as you learn the moves. I skipped the instructional video and went straight for the basic work out since I didn't know how long dd would nap. I probably got about 25 minutes in before she woke up, but better than nothing! Drank a ton of water and now I'm cooling off...

I need to do this every day!!! It really will help with the winter blues if i think of getting into a bikini this summer...

ETA: dh and i have been really disconnected lately, so we're actually thinking of leaving dd at my sister's house for about 2 hours and going out to dinner at some point this weekend. i think that will help with the depression...i hope so!!
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#137 of 364 Old 01-12-2006, 02:48 PM
 
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(OT, but does this remind anyone else of Nixon? )
This one too... :
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#138 of 364 Old 01-12-2006, 03:14 PM
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Exercise is the way to do it!

I'm about to head over to the 1000 minute fitness thread to update it..........today I even turned down Dh's amorous invitation for naptime cuddles and such....for exercise! (I must be losing my mind)

But I feel strong and gooooooooooooooood! <------I like this guy.


How is everyone today? Sun is out here, cool but crisp.....did my grocery today and toddler dd was SO amazingly well behaved and loving.

Counting my blessings today.
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#139 of 364 Old 01-12-2006, 09:36 PM
 
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Green Tea helps because of L-Theanine, which is supposed to really help with depression.

I get horrible depression because Michigan is dark and grey during the winter, but I am holding on. I am on Lexapro and that helps, but also excercise makes a huge difference. I need to get some extra light to give myself the needed full spectrum light for the winter months here.

Eric
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#140 of 364 Old 01-14-2006, 04:15 PM - Thread Starter
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Eric, thanks for the info. DO you know why it helps you to lose weight too? Same thing or something else?


Hey, it's mid-January! Another 6 weeks and we'll be having spring days and mild nights...WE're almost there! Hang tough!







Are we singing? I still need some more upbeat song ideas. Anyone?
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#141 of 364 Old 01-14-2006, 05:13 PM
 
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No idea on grown up upbeat songs but my 3 yo has been singing the wheels on the bus for the past 3 days, lol.

Ijust found out that I have no TIME for depression this year. The baby is due sometime in the next 7-8 weeks (give or take a couple weeks) and I have full courseload that started today too. Nothing to take my mind off depression like deadlines and homework.

I've been drinking lots of tea recently, dairy and I are not on speaking terms at the moment but I have this thing for spicy teas. (My current fave is Bengal Spice by Celestial Seasonings, I'm limited in where I can get my tea from and the selection is limited) I also have a yummy rose hip tea and some red tea and some organic peach tea that reminds me of summer. I drink green tea only occasionally, I do keep it on hand. When I'm really down I drink some hot lemon water with honey. Something about lemons always reminds me of warm days.
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#142 of 364 Old 01-14-2006, 07:56 PM - Thread Starter
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My dd's got me a bottle of Origins Lemon and mint cologne, I thinkk it's called "uplifting" or something. It smells Sooooooo good, I just love it. Makes me feel like

Been raining and raining here, but tomorrow....SNOW! I like it!
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#143 of 364 Old 01-14-2006, 09:31 PM
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Hey everyone....

I could use some support....feel like I'm slipping a bit.

Today is the 3rd anniversary of my dear Nonna's (my toddler's namesake) death. RIP Nonna I miss you.

I won't whine too much....but basically I am sad...the other night I posted a sweet story about my day with my toddler in TAO and got raked over the coals by some for no reason...put me into tears that night...I've since decided TAO is not worth the effort...a feeding frenzy of nasty. So that got me down and now Dh's car for the upmteenth time (long story short we sold our original older car that now we regret (he did) that needed work, went on one car for awhile...got another, that literally died on us, now we have another just over a year and it is currently dying (engine)...he needs it for work, and I need mine for dd's school (we live too far to walk in winter weather) and such. We are so down....we try so hard to maintain....pay bills and survive and we don't ask for much more than these used vehicles to run enough to keep us safe....did I mention my van is continually needing repairs on and off and tonight is being taken to friend mechanic for more? I am so ugh...........I am grateful for all my blessings and trying to stay sane and just be the mom I am and woman I am...............

But it's taking it's toll.


Thanks for reading.
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#144 of 364 Old 01-15-2006, 01:56 PM
 
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s to you April. I wish I could help more.

Monica , DH :cop , DD (8) , DS1 (5) , DS2 (2/09) , and the pup
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#145 of 364 Old 01-15-2006, 09:05 PM
 
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My psychiatrist just upped my Prozac on tuesday, so it hasn't kicked in yet, but I feel like complete crap and I don't think there's anything else he can do to help me at this point.

Ruth, single mommy to Leah, 19, Hannah, 18, and Jack, 12
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#146 of 364 Old 01-16-2006, 11:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruthla
My psychiatrist just upped my Prozac on tuesday, so it hasn't kicked in yet, but I feel like complete crap and I don't think there's anything else he can do to help me at this point.
((hugs))) Ruth, I am sorry you're struggling. I wish I could help...........


I'm having my own moments of anxiety...I have a history, as a teen I was put on meds though I eventually stopped them on my own they made me worse...anyhow, I managed to conquer it all a bunch of years ago prior to getting married but still have my moments..............and this weekend was it.

My mom made an offhand sick humoured type joke.......along the lines of me hurrying up to learn one of her recipes before she dies (she is totally healthy fine soon to be 59) and I have *a year*. We do joke like that at times, my whole fam, but it threw me and of course I am obsessing now that I will lose my mom too soon..........and this stems from all the local tragedies that happened over the holildays here that sent me reeling in sadness......scared to lose my own loved ones....and my dad, who is helping us fix our vehicles and not taking no for answer and he is a long haul trucker, has been my whole life, and I've lived with the possibility of losing him forever...and had so many close calls........and the older I get the more I worry and miss him, like a little girl....Ugh I am sorry to go on.........I'm just sad and anxious this week.....
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#147 of 364 Old 01-16-2006, 11:53 AM
 
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I thought I might pipe in here since SAD is something I deal with off and on. Especially since perimenopause is here! I think last year in January I ordered a whole poop-load of things online. This year it's sleep issues and dealing with changes. SOmetimes I "fake it", meaning not matter how crappy I feel I do my routine - exercise, eat well, take my vitamins, pretend that things are status quo. I remind myself that I can tolerate these yucky feelings, and that it wont be like this forever, that things will change for the better. Life will never be a flat-line of joy but will always have ups and downs. I also found that crocheting and brain candy DVDs were helpful. Do whatever gets you through the day. Forgive yourself for feeling like doo-doo. The voice in my head really gets into the self-critical mode - "what's wrong with you!!". Screw that! We is who we is and that's absolutely fabulous.

Peace out my sisters!

June
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#148 of 364 Old 01-16-2006, 12:12 PM
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Thanks June. You're right..........trying hard here to get into that mode..........Thank God for my kids..keep me going and thinking as you said we should....
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#149 of 364 Old 01-16-2006, 12:18 PM
 
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I like Rooibos tea - it seems to take the edge off - and I make cocoa the way it's made in Danmark - hot milk with a piece of your fave chocolate melting inside! YEAH!

As far as music is concerned: Any old funk or happy '70's dance music disco does it for me. Right now my dd is watching "roll bounce" - about disco skating in the '70s and the old tunes have me bouncing around.

PS - I like the Crunch exercise videos - "Pilates firm and tone", and there's another one - cardio with weights - i actually have some decent muscle definition - not bad for a 44 year old. Also, yoga is great.

I think it's time for us go get our butts outside.

peace
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#150 of 364 Old 01-16-2006, 10:33 PM - Thread Starter
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my2girlsmama, I've been reading you r writing and doing some of my own.

And as Boomingranny says, this is all temporary.

Death is hard. I don't think it's true that time eases the pain. It hasn't for me. But would my Grandmother still want to be here? She'd be...111! (Goodness!) WHen I'm sad and missing her, I remember that she wouldn't want to have lived THIS long. SHe wouldnt want to outlive her kids, it was her time.


It'll be a lot harder when it's MY mother, but she's 82...so it won't be that long .


Contemplating this, waiting for it, will just make TODAY a less delightful day. When it happens, will be time enough to grieve. You too.

Live today for what it actually contains. Is your day going well? Is the moment? Cars break down, I know. (I'm on a first name basis with my mechanic. ) Things go wrong. But this is when you need, NEED to go for a walk, or break out the bubbles, or bake sugar cookies with the kids. Dont let stuff get a hold of you!

And WRITE! Pour it out.


RUTHLA! I'm worrie about you. If your doc can't help you, then YOU have to! Right now, while you're reading this, start taking DEEP breaths. Oxygen is good, and we tend to breath shallowly when we need it the most.

Would you consider going for inpatient help? Even for just a few days? There are programs available! Call your local hospital admitting office and ask about mental health help, or your local community action or community mental health. Insurance is not always an issue.

Your children NEED you. Are they sleeping? Go look at them. (If they're awake and screaming at each other, please skip this! ) they are innocent and wihtout protection without you.

Are you exercising? Tell me. Outside? Force yourself. YOu don't have to like it, just DO it.

My cousin wrote a book, called "The Day Room" about her experiences with mental illness. It's good. Can you get it from the Library? Can I mail you my copy?

WE're doing this together, ok?
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