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It's going to be a beautiful spring! Please join! (Depression support)

9K views 216 replies 21 participants last post by  frowningfrog 
#1 ·
Welcome to our new beautiful spring!!!

I saw we were chatting over on the "I ain't going to get depressed this winter" thread (http://www.mothering.com/discussions...d.php?t=387694) about starting a new one. So I thought I'd start with a positive title!

But I need some major hugs. Last night I put DD to bed, read her stories and then told her she should go to sleep and I'd come back to check on her in 10 minutes. Well, I went downstairs, heard DS crying, nursed him back to sleep, then checked on DD who looked like she was asleep, so I went downstairs. Apparently DH heard DD over the monitor and went up and she told him "Mommy doesn't like me"
I'm so sad about this - I don't know why she would think that, I think maybe she was awake when I checked on her, but didn't move or say anything. I feel like such a bad mom right now.
 
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#4 ·
mightmoo! you're a good mama! don't feel bad. i'm sure it was just a misunderstanding.

and Red, come on mama, you can do it! you are one of my inspirations!!!!
Remember the good fairy? imagine her coming in and touching everything in your life and making it fabulous and then remember that you ARE the good fairy.

and if anyone wants some good inspiring loving thoughts to hold on to--check out the seven thoughts here, they are very nice:

http://www.drnorthrup.com/eletter-current_a.php

to all.
 
#5 ·
When I saw this thread I thought THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU I NEED SPRING SO MUCH. I need to get out to smell the fresh air. Dig in my Garden I need to play in the yard, feel the grass under my feet, go to the park, hike through the words, Gosh I need to go swimming lay on the beach and watch my girls play in the sand, feel the sun on my face. I truly believe our kids all need to get out side and just play including us. Winter is hard no matter how you deal with it. We are pretty crafty with projects, baking, games, movies, and just being busy while staying inside. Though you wouldn't know it this time of year. My kids are bouncing off the wall, not listening, tantrums ,there patience is gone. WE ALL JUST NEED TO GET OUT TO PLAY!!! Don't beat your self up this time of year is hard on all of us including the kids.
lots of love
crissy
 
#8 ·


IMO, It's impossible to get through motherhood without upsetting or offending each of your children at least once! Most of the time, kids just need to be reasured that you love them even though you can't do everything for them and be there for them 100% of the time.
 
#9 ·
Last weekend was so unbelievably warm - my DH and I went out to the nearby state park with the kids. I couldn't believe it, but DD walked with us for 2 hours (we brought the double stroller so she could ride if she wanted to) and it was just beautiful the whole time. This park has a working farm operating on it, so we got to see the cows and animals. We had a great time, got some good exercise and I even got a little bit of a sunburn - I'm super pale irish descent, so it doesn't take much, but it definitely makes it feel like spring.

I can't wait for things to start growing again - the farm was nice, but it was dormant still.

Oh, and if I forgot to mention it we bought a house, we close the end of next week. So that is really good, I just can't wait to have my own house again!

And this morning DD woke up early and was playing by herself downstairs and she came up with her cheeks colored with a pink highlighter ("Look Momma I have rosy cheeks!") and as I was washing it off I said something about needing to wash it off because she's going to school today and it makes me look like I'm a bad Mom. She said 'You're not a bad Mom!'
 
#10 ·
KIDS SAY THE DARNEST THINGS. If that's not the truth I don't know what is. I too got out the other day and man did it do my soul good. The girls could be out there all day but still Friday I hear snow ( I'm in ct.) But the itch is there I think it will do everyone good do just get outside. I also want to congrats on the new home. That's so awesome sometimes the environment change just feels so damn good scary Yes but good. Not to mention this is the second spring in my house and I can't believe what a Gardner I've become it's so therapeutic for me. I feel accomplishment when my flowers bloom. This year I'm going to attempt a veggie garden. I think it will be good for my girls as well. Keep your heads up girls even if you have to prop them..
lots of love
crissy
 
#11 ·
Hi. Can I join you all? I'm a mostly healthy lately, unmedicated, bipolar mama. Spring and summer are usually my hardest times. No SAD going on here! Unless it is of the opposite kind. This is my first unmedicated spring/summer in...maybe 6 years? I'm so far trying to cope by being very conscious of my mental/emotional states, exercising regularly, being honest with my friends, staying busy, but trying not to overcommit. So far, so good!! The depression on it's own is something I can handle most of the time, but when I start cycling it gets scary. I have a lot of hope that this year I'm going to manage it all with the support system I've been working on over the last couple years, and the coping skills I've been learning. However, I'm so happy to find a thread here where I can meet people like me, and be a support and maybe receive some support sometimes, too. :smile:

edit: LOL! I can't figure out how to make a smiley in the quickpost format! You'll have to imagine it. :)
 
#14 ·
Ugh, the last day or so have been rough and the next few look to be hard too. My uncle died yesterday. His neighbor hadn't seen him all day so when his lights didn't go on at dusk, she called the police. When they got there, he had already passed away earlier. He was diabetic and we think he overslept so he didn't get breakfast and went into diabetic shock. I think we are all at a loss with how to cope with this because my uncle was the odd duck - never married, no kids, lived in a mobile home by himself and most definitely had OCD. We went through his trailer looking for any info we might need to arrange things and I found lists (pages and pages) of exactly who sent him junk mail, piles of newspaper clippings, that sort of thing. As a kid I remember him being a lot of fun, he would take us to car shows and gave us fun gifts, as kids you don't think its odd that your 40 year old uncle lives packed in his childhood bedroom surrounded by baseball cards in your grandparents house. As he got older he got more and more OCD, I think the changes that were forced on him (his mother dying, moving out of his parents house, getting a new job) were just too much stress for him. He was unemployable mostly because he was extremely stubborn and I think the OCD got in the way - but he grew up in a time when they didn't recognize such things. I don't think at this point in his life he was happy, but I know he was worried about dying like this. I feel bad that we basically avoided him - just invited him to major holidays - he wasn't much fun to talk to, unless you wanted to hear a minute by minute blow of his pizza deliveries (when he could still do that). I feel bad we couldn't prevent it, but he wouldn't respond to advice, he wouldn't go to the doctor, etc. It's just so sad that he lived and died that way. It's so sad that we really won't miss him and I feel awful for feeling that way.


I saw him the day before yesterday - he brought over some rims & tires for me to sell (he desperately needed the money) and he told me he wouldn't take less than $1000 for them, otherwise they could "eat them". He just wouldn't listen to me that $500 was what they were worth and $500 was better than nothing (he had no need for extra rims!). Sigh.

Sorry to bring down the spring thread, but I really needed to just get that out and work through it.
 
#16 ·
Oh sweety I'm sorry to hear about your uncle it has to be real difficult dealing with a death in the family no matter how close you are to them. Don't judge your self over the emotions you should be feeling. Somtimes your true feelings overcomes the obligation of family love. Take one day at a time and keep your head up!!
lots of love
crissy
 
#21 ·
Thanks everyone. It's been a tough week, but doing better now.

How is everyone's spring going? It was pretty warm here today, not that that got me off my butt and outside to enjoy it. Tomorrow we close on our house so I am really excited for that!
 
#22 ·
yay closing on your house that's so so exciting!!!
It has been vary nice here in ct. the past couple of days. I've had the girls outside and running there energy out so they've been sleeping a lot easier the past couple of days. I know it's gotta be the fresh air.
I've been doing real good my Dr upped my zoloft and I've been doing good. I suffer from OCD so the intrusive thoughts have been suppressed for the past two weeks so I can breath a little easier. Not to mention I wrote to my senator, governor, state rep, Mayer, consumer reports, attorney general ext. about claims I'm making against my mortgage company Long story... But I got a response double Yay. So that makes me feel a little more confident in making the allegations against them.
WE started our own business just one month in so money is tight but my husband picked up some work today so that can ease our anxiety over money at least for the next month so. So things are looking on the up and up. Just taken one day at a time seems to be working for me lately..
Mightymo I'm so happy your feeling better. I know buying a house can be so so exciting yet nerve racking. But it's the best feeling in the world to call it yours. Is this your first time as a home buyer. I was never the type to work in the yard and garden ever since we bought our house I've taken to it. This is the second spring we've been here so I'm so excited to see all the plants and bulbs I planted last year come up. I'm also going to try a vegi garden first time ever. So it's nice when it's yours and YOU CAN DO WHAT EVER THE HEC YOU WANT TO DO TO IT. If you want to paint the walls pink you can. Tear down a wall and make a room biger hay why not... But anyway blah blah blah.

CRISSY
 
#23 ·
Congratulations, MightyMoo!!

Crissy, I'm excited about your new business. What is it?

I'm doing fine on the depression end...somewhat lethargic and unmotivated, but still engaged in life and exercising most days. I'm feeling a little flaky, though, which comes on when I overcommit. I'm only committed to things that I really want to be doing, though, so I've got to get my act together!! And so far it's not bad enough that anyone has noticed or been let down. Except dh. My house is relatively clean, but I haven't done some of my regular chores lately and I know that bugs him. Which makes me want to do even less...hence the lethargy. Shoot, I really don't have anything to be complaining about. Sometimes it's hard for me to sort out what are normal, appropriate emotions from those that are induced by bipolar. Maybe normal, healthy feel unmotivated and lethargic sometimes and flakey, too. But, I guess the difference is, for those of us with mood disorders, we have to recognize the warning signs...the triggers...for starting to get ill so that we can adjust our lives to hold it off. So, that's what I'm trying to do. I'm not going to take anything else on.
 
#24 ·
. Cherylann You have to take one day at a time or like me sometimes an hour at a time. You have to disappoint people and take care of yourself and your husband and kids. You said you have the support system so use it. I'm curious why are spring and summer your hardest time. To me that's one of my best. The signs of life are in this time of year from the bird/animals coming out to the leaves/flowers blooming. I have to say my hardest time is from the second week of January to the second week of march. No holidays, it's still cold, the kids have lost there patience as well as I, the projects and games are just blah, moneys tight because my husband works out doors and we're still recovering from the holidays, I'm an out door person so bring that time a year on and I'm happy. I have to give you a lot of credit doing it with out meds. I know bipolar is as crippling as OCD and if not treated it can get bad. I myself have tried numerous times to get off the meds at the time I thought it was ppd . Now that I've bee diagnosed with OCD I've decided to except the side effects and stay on the meds for my sake and my children. Cherylann I'm here if you need another support I know I can use one. Mdc has been an awesome support it nice to find moms you can relate to.

crissy
ohh ya my husbands business is seamless gutters...
 
#25 ·
Thanks, Crissy! Sounds like a great business to be in.

I don't know why I get this way in spring. I heard another person describe it recently. She said something along the lines of, "It's like there is all this pressure building in nature. Everything is getting ready to awaken and explode into life and I feel like that pressure builds up in me." I'm not sure if I related to her feelings or just the fact that she gets like me in springtime. I start to feel like I need to crawl out of my skin...literally, like I need to shed my body.
 
#26 ·
I've never noticed any seasonal changes in my depression. I've noticed hormonal, cyclical changes, and I've noticed a connection to the weather- if it's rainy and icky out I feel icky, when it's nice out I'm more likely to feel good.

Sometimes there's something nice about curling up into a warm little hole in the winter, and it just feels good. Then spring comes along and there are all these expectations "I should be happy, spring is here" and "it's a nice day, I should go out and enjoy it" and then curling up into a warm little hole doesn't quite feel as satisfying- even if that's still what you want or need to do.
 
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