mama's please forgive me if i dont use the correct terminology or in ignorance hurt anybody. i always seem to
so please forgive me if i say something that hurts u.
so here is my situation. i am a single mom with a v. abusive ex. now here is my issue.
the first 5 years of our marriage couldnt have been better. i thought i had met my soulmate. he was so nice and loving. yet controlling but i could live with that. he would do a bunch of little things for me. really caring things. that touched my heart and that i would expect a person who loves another person do.
and once he started cheating on me and i finally asked him to leave (when i first discovered he went thru the whole crying i am so sorry for doing this to u, u deserve better) the anger just errupted. before that for a whole year and a half i was trying to take care of a marraige breaking down. that's when the emotional abuse began. name calling. belittling. and it continues even today - 2 and a half years after separation.
two of his bros take medication. his mom has issues which she holds under control without medication. he has had a tough family life and a horrendous teen (bad acne totally bullied and made fun of).
he appears strange to others. some have cut him out of their lives because he goes beyond the limit of fun, others he has done so himself because he doesnt agree what they are doing like dating a kind of girl my ex doesnt like. he is an extremely tormented man and everything is black in his books. ethicaly or otherwise everything is black or white. no grey areas. once he challenged his bro to do what he thought was right at his work when his bro was being accused of being racist by a disgruntled coworker - and he got angry coz his bro wouldnt follow his advice. his bro doesnt like confrontation and what my ex was asking him to do looked good on paper but not in real life.
now he is fantastic with his dd and i fully trust him with her. the only other person he is this mean to is his mom.
i have never met a man like him before. when he is sweet, he is extra, extra sweet but when he is mean he goes to the v. height.
how could a man crying about just the thought of me dying before him turn into this angry name calling viciously tongued man.