Irritable, unhappy, tired... ideas? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 9 Old 08-18-2008, 09:59 PM - Thread Starter
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Please help me! I don't know what to do next...

Here is what's been going on:
- EXTREME irritability
- overall unhappiness (except about my beautiful son)
- fatigue during the day, but trouble falling asleep at night.
- frustration with ones I love
- weight gain (eating even when I'm not hungry)

Those are just the real obvious things...

Few things about myself:
-SAHM (busy high-paced job before son)
-18mo old wonderful little boy (still nursing 4-5 times a day)
-married for 5 years

I love my husband. He is working so hard to make it possible for me to stay with my son. But, I am so mean to him. I take things out on him. I snap at him. I have NO patience with him. Why??? (BTW, I am never this way to my son) I don't know what is going on with me. I have noticed this gradually getting worse over the past 8-9 months. But I am starting to get worried. I thought it might be hormones, but I don't think it would continue for this long.

I have had depression in the past... but I don't know if this is the same type of thing or not.

TIA for any help/advise!

Claire - Mama to my wonderful J and expecting another bundle of joy in November 2010!
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#2 of 9 Old 08-18-2008, 10:35 PM
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Check out the thyroid and adrenal threads in Health. Your symptoms sound pretty classic - I have the same ones

Weight gain is really common with extended breastfeeding. You should stop gaining more after 20-30 lbs. Its also common with thyroid issues. Thyroid issues and adrenal issues are typical for us moms, particularly extended breastfeeding ones.

Doesn't mean you have to wean - but you have to eat really well and take good care of yourself.
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#3 of 9 Old 08-22-2008, 12:46 PM
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I agree that you should check for thyroid problems.

To me it sounds like depression. Depression can take on many forms and doesn't have to be the same from time to time. I think that lack of sleep will make you more irritable.

You could try to google St. Johns Wort and breastfeeding. I think that is what I would look into first.

Good luck - I hope you'll feel better soon.

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#4 of 9 Old 08-22-2008, 03:11 PM
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EFT, or tapping, has helped me when I am experiencing any number of negative feelings or thoughts. It might sound hokey, but may be worth a try.
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#5 of 9 Old 08-22-2008, 03:28 PM
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Extreme irritability for long periods of time is my #1 sign that depression is occuring again. That and not having an interest in anything I am normally passionate about - like knitting or reading.

I agree w/ looking into everything the pp's have said...especially thyroid and adrenals. I take a lot of supplements to support my adrenals due to adrenal fatigue and that helps keep me off of antidepressants.

I also notice that when I get bored w/ what's going on at home I get more irritable and depressed. In other words, although I'm lucky to be able to stay home with my kids...I almost hate to say this...being a sahm can be boring. Eat, do dishes, play, eat, do dishes, play, nap, eat, do dishes etc gets really old day after day. Sometimes I throw a load of laundry in to mix things up a bit! I notice I'm much better if I'm getting out w/ other moms or taking a (free) class here or there. Are you taking much time for you? I know it's hard to want to go out when all you want to do is stare at the walls or lay in bed and be left alone, but it really does help immensely.

Personally, if you want to stay off drugs I would avoid a regular doc cause aside from St. John's Wort they'll just want to put you on a RX...which is fine if you feel that's what you need. I go to my chiropractor and she tests hormones as well as suggests what supplements I would feel better on. Regular docs just don't normally do that kind of stuff. HTH!
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#6 of 9 Old 08-22-2008, 07:53 PM
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I was going to suggest having your thyroid checked, also.

Chatty Girl - 3/2006, Lovey Boy - 1/2010, Delicious Baby Girl - 1/2012
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#7 of 9 Old 08-26-2008, 05:26 PM - Thread Starter
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Thanks for the responses!

I did go and talk to my doctor. We did some bloodwork, and all came out fine. So it's not the thyroid.

He thinks that I am depressed... but not major depression. He would like to put my on a low dosage of medicine (which I was on years ago as a teenager) BUT won't because I am still nursing my son. I am a little frustrated, because I have read (on here and from Dr. Hale) that less than 1% gets into your milk. Yet, he refuses to prescribe it... says it could cause horrible effects on my child. Hmm.

I'm not quite sure what to do now.

Oh, and I looked up St. John's Wort:
Thomas Hale, RPh, PhD, author of Medications and Mothers' Milk, says that St. John's Wort appears to be relatively safe for nursing mothers, but recommends that caution be used. He suggests that other treatments (Zoloft, Paxil) are probably preferred.
I guess I will call my midwife (nurse practitioner) and see what she suggests.

Thanks so much!

Claire - Mama to my wonderful J and expecting another bundle of joy in November 2010!
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#8 of 9 Old 08-26-2008, 08:33 PM
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i have heard that most dr's tests for thyroid are not thorough enough. ie. they don't do the T3 or T4 levels or something.

i also got my thyroid tested and i'm not sure what they tested and what they didn't in their labwork. so i'm curious if i still might have a thyroid problem...i'm feeling very much like you are, mama. i can't seem to get over it and i'm in a real bad way lately.
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#9 of 9 Old 08-26-2008, 08:39 PM
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Heck it's so hard to be a sahm, of course you get snappy. Add that to a society which has no tolerance for the inevitable cycles of life and downtime....we must all be perfect automotons who smile and feel happy ALL the time, else something is wrong.

I think in retrospect I was depressed raising all three toddlers-less so for the first, who I had to work with, it was much easier emotionally than sahm, esp if you are used to a high functioning exciting job and you go is f&&&* hard and esp with our society which does not value community.

I say. take some time, every day for you. Whether that means vegging, reading, amazing thing, exercise....once you start to do that, your moods will steady. You need to take care of you, and not give give. Have hub make din, clean or something at least once a week. Try to create some structure or goals for yourself.

talk to him about how hard it is on you, and though it might seem easy it's the hardest damn thing you have done.

I think you are fine. You are human, prob sleep deprived and lacking support. Hang in there, address what you can...and yes they do get older and yes it gets easier--sleep being a HUGE factor. hello sleep dep is used as torture. It is hard!

No offense but I think this whole thyroid thing can be a bit overdone. It's sort of a catch all right now; not that there are not legitmate concerns, but it's too popular. Treat the reason your thyroid is malfunctioning... If you go on meds, you will have side effects. Just fyi. there's no med without side effects.

Worst case try acupuncture or an alternative modality.
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