What should I do(In Your non professional opinions) - Mothering Forums
Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 01:48 AM - Thread Starter
 
canadiannancy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Ontario
Posts: 2,104
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
So I went to a Psychiatrist yesterday. He asked me what had led me to go. I told him I had asked for a referral from my family Dr in June after I had a miscarriage when I didn't feel like I was coping ell enough, and had followed up with the hospital beginning of October after CPS had come to my house after a report made by the police the night I was robbed that my house was a mess. He asked why my house was a mess. I explained partly because there was a lot going on at the time, I had been (physically) sick and had had some things going on but also just depressed. I said I felt I needed help and had asked for counseling. I said I couldn't cope well enough the whole summer, first the miscarriage, then issues with house guest, then visited my mom who is out of province undergoing chemo my house got trashed by house sitter not house sitting and had cats run away, then issues with brother and then being robbed while my family was home then there while my grandpa died, when I had never experienced that before.

He asked if I had been sleeping well. I said not at all since the robbery at least. I am afraid of someone breaking in again. He said "Oh you are paranoid then? I said no, It is not paranoid when It has really happened and could happen again. He said oh well no one gets robbed twice you are just paranoid.I said it has happened to me before
DO you hear voices too? I said no,
Do you think someone is following you since you are paranoid about being broken in again? I said no
DO you think someone is poisoning your food. I said no.
I said just depressed in general added to a really bad few months. He said

YOU HAVENT HAD A BAD FEW MONTHS. YOU ARE JUST A WEAK WOMAN. YOU CATASTROPHISE LITTLE EVENTS THAT MEAN NOTHING AND YOU NEED TO BE STRONGER FOR YOUR KIDS. THE PATIENT WHO COMES TO SEE ME FROM IRAQ WHOSE COUNTRY IS AT WAR WHOSE PARENTS ARE DEAD WHOSE HUSBAND GOT SHOT IN FRONT OF HER WHO IS FINE BUT NEEDS HEL SLEEPING, SHE HAS PROBLEMS. YOU ARE JUST A WEAK WOMAN WHO NEEDS TO BE STRONGER OR ELSE GET YOUR KIDS TAKEN AWAY.

Keeping in mind I was calm. clean body and clothes and not crying or anything while taking to him until he says this. Then I started crying a little. Seems like he had made up his mind before I even saw him. So then he prescribes me cipralex(he said an antidepressant) and seraquel which he said was a sleeping pil that would "cause excessive weight gain" I am over 200lbs. I do not need excessive weight gain. I looked it up online and seraquel can be used off label for sleeping since it had sedative properties but on line said it was an anti psychotic used for bipolar or schizophrenia. I have not been diagnosed with either of these things. I have in the past seen a psychologist for over 10 years and a psychiatrist for several years and have been diagnosed with ptsd from sexual abuse and major depression.
I also saw both medications are not considered safe while pregnant (due to not being bale to take birth control I choose no to take anyhting that can be teratogenic, or harmful not sure if I am or not haven't tested and am not in a position to be right now but....)

I am pissed. I want to talk to another DR, but before I do....does what he said make sense? And with the meds..I may need meds. But telling me the one was a sleeping pill that would make me gain weight, makes no sense to me, I want to complain tgo someone about what he said but maybe he is right?

Nancy, Mom to Kyra (2005), Zoe (2006), Callie (2007) (2008), and Xavier (2009)
canadiannancy is offline  
#2 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 02:03 AM
 
stormborn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Posts: 2,688
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 9 Post(s)
WTF? A therapist said that to you?!? Run away.

I have no idea on the meds, I suppose he meant that weight gain was a possible side effect. Regardless, find a new therapist right away. What a UA violation.: I'm sorry you were treated like that.
stormborn is offline  
#3 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 11:41 AM
 
crocus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 110
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
First, the doctor is NOT right!!! You are NOT a weak woman! You found the strength to attend therapy and seek help for some serious issues that you are facing at this time. I would recommend you do make another appointment with a different therapist. Perhaps you should consult with your family doctor about this?

Is he a registered therapist? I would seriously consider reporting him to his regulatory body.

Again, you are NOT a weak woman!
crocus is offline  
#4 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 11:47 AM - Thread Starter
 
canadiannancy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Ontario
Posts: 2,104
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I assume he is registered. He is a psychiatrist working at the local hospital. And it is where I keep having doubts....if his job is to treat people maybe its just a way of having me deal woth my depression? Which is why i am asking here. I value the opinion of the people here on MDC greatly, and have limited real life people to sound off if what he said/did sounds right.

Nancy, Mom to Kyra (2005), Zoe (2006), Callie (2007) (2008), and Xavier (2009)
canadiannancy is offline  
#5 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 11:59 AM
 
Jemmind's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Maysville, GA
Posts: 510
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'd go see a phychologist rather than a physciatrist. Then they can't push meds on you.

Julie, wife and mother. I love my little ones: DS ::Corbin Randall---6/06 and DD :Morgan Reese 12/08.
Jemmind is offline  
#6 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 12:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
canadiannancy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Ontario
Posts: 2,104
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Unfortunately the hospital does not have psychologists on staff anymore after budget cuts, and I am not in a financial position to be paying a private one

The meds are one problem I had with the session, the class of them, the indications for use and him saying one was for sleep when it is not, exactly. But the other issue i had was the things he said.

Nancy, Mom to Kyra (2005), Zoe (2006), Callie (2007) (2008), and Xavier (2009)
canadiannancy is offline  
#7 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 02:25 PM
 
guestmama9915's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,366
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
That is WRONG. He needs to be revoked.
guestmama9915 is offline  
#8 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 06:29 PM
 
BellinghamCrunchie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Alpha Centauri
Posts: 4,293
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Do you still want meds? If so, try another psychiatrist or your primary care physician. There are some meds that are safe for pregnancy, and its unlikely that you'll get another quack.

Seroquel is regularly used off label for sleep issues, so he probably wasn't thinking you were psychotic and prescribing behind your back. Its not the right med for you or for pregnancy, though, and borders on medical incompetence. It can be prescribed during pregnancy when a woman is psychotic and no other anti-psychotics are working, so its not completely unheard of to give to a pregnant woman.

Duxylamine Succinate is an over the counter antihistamine/mild sleep agent that I used during my pregnancy because it also helps with nausea. Its supposed to be safe during pregnancy, if you want to try a mild sleep med. Its also regular strength Unisom (not the maximum strength which is something else).

I definitely think you would enjoy getting support from a counselor or psychologist in addition to or instead of meds. You sure have been through a lot. Anyone going through that much stuff would need, and deserve, some extra support.
BellinghamCrunchie is offline  
#9 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 06:37 PM
 
Ruthla's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 47,873
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
There are a few things I think you should do:

1) File an official complaint for that psychiatrist- calling you "a weak woman" is completely unprofessional, as was the whole implication that your problems are insignificant just because others have bigger problems. Your problems are real to you, and any mental health professional should understand that.

2) Find a therapist- psychiatrists generally prescribe meds, rather than offering therapy. Therapists (who can be social workers or psychologists) generall refer you to psychiatrists if needed. Are there any other local mental health clinics in your area, other than this particular hospital? Does this hospital have social workers or nurses who work as therapists? Even a "non professional" support group for parents who have lost babies would be a huge help you you right now, although that should ideally be a supplement to individual counseling rather than a substitute.

3) Find a new MD (psychiatrist or maybe your PCP) to prescribe meds if you feel that you truly need meds right now.

Ruth, single mommy to Leah, 19, Hannah, 18, and Jack, 12
Ruthla is offline  
#10 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 07:07 PM
 
thisiswhatwedo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: transient universe
Posts: 375
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
most medical plans, if you have one, would rather pay less to have you see a psychologist or a social worker, it cost about half as much so if you do have insurance check into it. If you don't you can go to a community run non profit mental health clinic, although the wait is long. I also endorse the support group thing. If a Dr. tells you you are a weak woman he should have his license revoked, no other answer for that one.
thisiswhatwedo is offline  
#11 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 11:04 PM
 
canadianchick's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Enjoying the early Spring!!! Yeah!
Posts: 3,678
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
You are not weak and he is an ass for saying that. I took Seroquel two years ago after a car accident because I could not sleep after the accident. I only took it for a few months. I would try to get in to see another doc.

Kim, proud CPS mom to Marnie and my 4 legged kids, Jess, Zander, Oliver, Stumpy and Eddie.
canadianchick is offline  
#12 of 22 Old 10-17-2008, 11:43 PM
 
lovbeingamommy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 1,929
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
- what he said was completely unprofessional. Right now in my life I'm in the worst state of mind (anxiety and stress) that I've ever been, HOWEVER, no one will convince me that I'm WEAK!! That's ludicrous. Mental health issues are REAL and need to be dealt with as such. Why in the world a psychiatrist would tell someone they're weak is beyond me.

I am so very sorry you are going through this and hope you can find someone who is more professional.

You are in Canada, right? Do you have access to Naturopathic doctors? If so, that might be a possibility for a more natural approach to treatment. If you are interested in more specifics pm me. I have some connections with ND schools in Canada. Good luck to you mama - I truly know how hard mental health issues can be

Kate, Wife to DH and Mommy to a 5yo lovin' DS; three angels 4/08 9/08 3/10 in Heaven,
waitin' for my baby

lovbeingamommy is offline  
#13 of 22 Old 10-24-2008, 11:31 PM
 
BunnySlippers's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Fluffierville
Posts: 2,735
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Holy crap! I can't believe what a UAV that guy was. You have to report him!
Im sorry you keep having such lousy run-ins with people.

Decluttering 500/2010
BunnySlippers is offline  
#14 of 22 Old 10-25-2008, 01:27 AM
 
mommydancer's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 599
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
That "professional" wasn't. I think you may be right with your guess about him taking some angle...saying that to try to manipulate you into looking at your situation a different way. It is highly inappropriate to do it the way you described, though. It doesn't have to be an attack. He might better have pointed out to you that you have managed to make it through some difficult circumstances, and that you have more strength than you give yourself credit for. Maybe one way to show him he's wrong about your being weak is to speak up to his licensing board...just to let yourself have a voice about how this idiot made you feel. Use it to make you stronger. He is small minded and had no right to discount you that way.

P.S.- A good therapist (professional counselor or clinical social worker) will help you build yourself up and learn new ways to cope. Mental health help should not hurt your feelings or your pride.

Momma to one small person I call Smoodgie :joy.gif
mommydancer is offline  
#15 of 22 Old 10-25-2008, 06:23 PM
 
harrietsmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Hesperia, MI
Posts: 1,643
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Ohmygosh!!! What an ASSS!!!! No, ignore everything he said, wait on the meds, and start over. (I gained about 15 lbs on Seroquel over 2 years on a very high dose by the way, so that was a shitty thing to say) Can you say power trip/burned out???

I'm so sorry your seeking help resulted in such a disaster. You have been through a hell of a lot! I think it would be very normal to be depressed, scared, overwhelmed, traumatized and grieving, all at once. I didn't read the other responses, but I would look for a T who specializes in trauma recovery/ptsd, and perhaps find a sensitive doc that way?


Heather, mama to Harriet, Crispin, in with Tom and 2
harrietsmama is offline  
#16 of 22 Old 10-26-2008, 09:11 AM
 
Sileree's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: SE Michigan
Posts: 1,079
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by canadiannancy View Post
YOU HAVENT HAD A BAD FEW MONTHS. YOU ARE JUST A WEAK WOMAN. YOU CATASTROPHISE LITTLE EVENTS THAT MEAN NOTHING AND YOU NEED TO BE STRONGER FOR YOUR KIDS. THE PATIENT WHO COMES TO SEE ME FROM IRAQ WHOSE COUNTRY IS AT WAR WHOSE PARENTS ARE DEAD WHOSE HUSBAND GOT SHOT IN FRONT OF HER WHO IS FINE BUT NEEDS HEL SLEEPING, SHE HAS PROBLEMS. YOU ARE JUST A WEAK WOMAN WHO NEEDS TO BE STRONGER OR ELSE GET YOUR KIDS TAKEN AWAY.


Quote:
Originally Posted by canadiannancy
I looked it up online and seraquel can be used off label for sleeping since it had sedative properties but on line said it was an anti psychotic used for bipolar or schizophrenia. I have not been diagnosed with either of these things.
I am just stunned. This is so wrong on so many levels. I agree with everyone else. Run away from this guy. And you are NOT a weak woman for needing help.

intactivist.gif  ribbonpb.gif RN student, bellycast.gif birth doula since 2006
Sileree is offline  
#17 of 22 Old 10-26-2008, 06:22 PM
 
Kokopelli-mana's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 653
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Hi
I just love the fact that since you were so blown away by his incompetance, and you didn't take everything he said as a given, it proves that you are indeed NOT weak in any way! I love the irony!!! Run while you can and just be glad you are strong enough not to have fallen for that crap!
You will be alright. You just need to find the right professional to help you through this touch spell. Good luck and

Mama of 10yo dd, 7 yo ds, and 22 month old ds. No VAX, Anti-Circ, Lactivist, EC, UCB x 2. 

Kokopelli-mana is offline  
#18 of 22 Old 10-26-2008, 06:22 PM
 
Kokopelli-mana's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Posts: 653
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
..sorry .... typo. meant to say "tough" spell

Mama of 10yo dd, 7 yo ds, and 22 month old ds. No VAX, Anti-Circ, Lactivist, EC, UCB x 2. 

Kokopelli-mana is offline  
#19 of 22 Old 10-26-2008, 07:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
canadiannancy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Ontario
Posts: 2,104
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
:

Not sure if i updated. I made a complaint with the hospital about his comments. I also informed the CPS worker about everything that happened and she said I absolutely did not have to go back to him, in fact she reccomened a therapist who would work with me. Now I just have to solve the problem of no child care for appointments and I should be set. I have had therapists before, I had seen 2 psychiatrists and several psychologists before but never had an experience quite like this one.

Nancy, Mom to Kyra (2005), Zoe (2006), Callie (2007) (2008), and Xavier (2009)
canadiannancy is offline  
#20 of 22 Old 10-26-2008, 07:50 PM
 
Ruthla's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Long Island, NY
Posts: 47,873
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 3 Post(s)
I'm glad you're getting help and didn't take this guys' comments to heart!

Ruth, single mommy to Leah, 19, Hannah, 18, and Jack, 12
Ruthla is offline  
#21 of 22 Old 10-26-2008, 07:57 PM
 
hellyaellen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: georgia
Posts: 3,410
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
oh, i'm glad to see a good resolution on this one

have you tried your tribal section for babysitting recs?
hellyaellen is offline  
#22 of 22 Old 10-26-2008, 08:16 PM
 
ms.shell's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 1,393
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Mama that sucks what he said. obviously, he was WRONG.
It sounds like you have serious reservations about the scripts, esp the seroquel. i just wanted to second that you probably dont want this drug. I went through a really bad late miscarriage (twins) last year. After i finally had a d+c, i asked the dr to write me a script for some zoloft to help me through the rough patch. She prescribed seroquel instead. like you, i had no bipolar or schizophrenic or psychotic tendencies or symptoms or diagnosis or anything like that, but she thought this was the best drug for me. i took it. yeah, it sure is a sleeping pill (youll be knocked right out and sleep hard and well) but it is so much more than that. you can tell it is for someone with those extreme disturbances, because it just totally dulls your brain. like, i couldnt have any disturbing thoughts because my head was in a thick fuzz and i couldnt really think of anything. i thought it was an extremely STRONG DRUG and definitely way more than i needed. the problem is you cant just stop taking it, you have to wean off of it and it is rough. it did make me gain a fair amount of weight for the relatively short time (not more than 2 months start to finish) i took it. I definitely recommend against taking this unless it is prescribed properly for someone psychotic or extremely unbalanced, etc. (which it defintiely does not sound like you are).
I am glad it looks like you willl have a therapist to help you instead of this psychiatrist who sounds like he could use some himself

Mama to 3 boys 

ms.shell is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off