He has never been easy on his babysitters, has never been the kind of baby that would smile at anyone but mama and daddy. So most of our family are afraid to babysit him, and as a consequence, it's hard to get a break.
I'm willing to discuss his feeding and sleeping habits and daily and bedtime routines. Someone please help me figure this out. Maybe partly, I just wanted to see if anyone else had a baby that was always cranky, and how it worked out. We're always stressed out and I feel awful and guilty. I feel like I'm being a terrible mama for disparaging him, but I'm terrified that that's just his personality. Help!
So, all I can do is send a and let you know that you aren't alone. If I were you, I would look into digestive/sensory/allergy problems and maybe a swing ()
Lisa, lucky mama of Kelly (3/93) , Emma (5/03) , Evan (7/05) , & Jenna (6/09)
Loving my amazing dh, James & forever missing Aaron Ambrose (11/07)
DD was (and to some extent still is) similar to what you're describing. She was NEVER happy for pretty much the first year of her life. Constantly crying and whinging, screaming if you put her down, the whole 9 yards. We live abroad so there's no one to help but DH and he works a lot, so it was pretty much all on me (I'm a SAHM).
It's absolutely draining to have to look after a baby 24/7 that's just never content. You feel like nothing you do is right and that you must be a terrible parent. NOT TRUE!! Coping with a baby like that and remaining AP is a marvellous achievement! The majority of babies really aren't that difficult, so try not to compare yourself or your baby with other moms and babies - it'll only make you feel bad.
Now, for the sort of good news. I found that DD's temperament has gradually improved over the past few months. I think a lot of her unhappiness was due to her inability to do everything she wanted to do. Now that she can walk and has a good signing vocabulary (she's still not verbal) she can interact with the world an awful lot more, and it really seems to have alleviated a lot of her unhappiness. She is now capable of occasionally playing by herself (with me in the room of course!) for a couple of minutes. I can leave her with DH for an hour or even 2 to get out and run errands without her screaming hysterically the whole time - now they actually have fun together.
I think other things that contribute(d) to the unhappiness apart from frustration with her own lack of abilities were; silent reflux (I've started her on some mild meds and seeing some improvement), teeth (she has an awful time with teeth and nothing really seems to make it better and she's nearly constantly 'teething') and possibly some food sensitivities (though I haven't been able to pin those down yet, and I suspect they're relatively minor in comparison with the other things).
(I'm just blowin' through but I thought maybe I could help a little...)
I'm 19 years old now. When I was a baby, I literally almost sent my mother to a mental institution. From what she and Dad tell me, I had two modes: sleep and scream. As a child I was very picky about things like the seams in my socks, how tight my shoes were (if they weren't threatening to cut off circulation, i wasn't content) and other stupid (in hind-sight) comfort things.
I'm fine now. In fact, I'm EXTREMELY adaptable. I guess it doesn't help you much, but I just wanted to say that it might just be a "baby" thing. Maybe it'll get better. I wish I could help out more--you sound really frazzled. Hang in there, mama.
Kris: "auntie" to W (7yrs) and Z (5yrs)
→Waiting to start my own little family←
I have boys! My first baby boy was born 10/08 and my second baby boy was born 7/12
Really, I think a lot of babies like this are just super aware and clued in, and need lots and lots of attention to meet their cognitive needs. People used to comment about how 'aware' DD was, pretty much from birth - and I think that's a large factor in this. Some (most?) babies are content to just sit/lie around and look at things until they're able to do more, but some babies are constantly trying to do more than they are physically capable of, and get terribly frustrated when they just can't move/communicate as they think they should be able to, KWIM?
When he was 6-7 months he wouldn't start solids. It was obvious he was having developmental delays because he didn't want to leave my arms. He became failure to thrive because he wouldn't allow food in his mouth. If you tried to force him out of my arms or to do things he didn't want to do he would scream.
This was in the late 1980's and they were just starting to have occupational therapy and physical therapy for sensory difficulties. He responded well to therapy once he got the right diagnosis. He also needed speech therapy. He did need therapy for years and continues to have skin sensitivities and is limited in the foods he eats.
: Grandmother , 3 Adult Sons
She's five now. She still MUST wear long pants and long sleeves or the itching can come back. (even in summer) and she's always in a great mood now.
But, while some unhappy kids can be explained by a medical issue.. some kids just seem to hate the world. It isn't anything anybody is doing, or not doing, some people just have that personality. Most outgrow it when they find that really great stage.. either walking, running, running AWAY, or whatever it is that pleases them.
But, it sure is miserable for a while.
Is he happy naked? Maybe he really is uncomfortable in his skin?