Just wondering your thoughts on this....
But I would not be cool with being separated from my 10-day-old baby, even if she was with her dad. What if she got hungry and needed me?
eta- there's NO WAY, separated or not, that my child's father or anyone would be able to take him somewhere without me for about the first 6 months. i nurse on demand and if my baby demands to nurse when i'm not around... yeah, no. not gonna happen.
Sue, Mama to Fiona Aileen (2/1/09) and Maeve Penelope (10/7/11)
I wouldn't be comfortable with my newborn going out without me that young though...as much for MY needs as hers!
Without me, for longer than 1 hour--just today, and he's 3 weeks old. I was gone for about 2.5 hours and left him with my uncle while I went clothes shopping. I left him because it's 90 degrees outside and I didn't want to haul him in and out of the car in the heat to go shopping. My uncle lived less than 1 mile from where I was shopping. And it was during his nap time, so he slept the whole time I was gone.
I couldn't imagine keeping him in the house for 1-2 months. I'd go batty.
I went to a bfing march 3.5 weeks pp and other mamas were surprised I was out and about with him so little....
admittedly, i have left her in the care of others, since she was about 5 weeks old, amounting to once or twice a week, for a few hours, but even to this day i will not leave her alone with anyone who isn't also a mom. this has been the source of quite a few arguments between me and her dad.
i hated to leave her, but i really needed a break. being the sole parent to a newborn is incredibly taxing.
With ds, we were at the ped almost every day the first week. He came w/ me to the MWs office at 4 days old as well.
An outing isn't really the same as an outing without mom, it really is asking too much to insist a new mom allow her baby anywhere without her.
That said, remember how you felt at 10 days. Still emotional? Recovering physically? I could barely take a shower wthout panic that my son would need me. I'd agree with the other moms that 10 days is too soon for dad to take baby out and away from mom, even for just an hour. But it is reasonable for dad to want to spend some time with his child. Maybe the mom could take a nap? Then the dad could have some privacy without taking the child away....
Wife to DH , mom to DS (4/09), and DD (8/11), and crafty and hardworking in my own right! In my parenting journey I've , , , , and. To each family their own!!
"There are words for people like me, but I don't think there are very many."
From strangers to friends to family, I love sharing the baby. I don't fret about germs (they're good for us, and I honestly wonder where some people live that they say "everyone is sick" - unless someone has an oozing sore on their face and hands, they can have at my babies!).
So, the answer for all four of my babies is "within hours of birth". I love showing off the babies!
My pediatrician says TWELVE weeks!! I think I was about three days with this one, too...in a sling as well. It was out of necessity-- I have two big kids who need to be driven places, and I do not have help.
I have separated from baby ds for up to 2 hours at a time on a couple of occasions, and although I do nurse on demand, this little guy is quite easily soothed without me if in the arms of a loving person. If I leave him with one of his grandmas, he will sleep in their arms or on their chests for the whole time I am gone.
W/my latest babe it was 3 days (w/me in sling), I left him w/dh for 30 min when he was 10 days, other than that it's about 1 hr or less and only w/dh. I totally trust him to call me if babe needs me though, if we weren't on great terms I wouldn't even consider it.
I don't think it's unreasonable for her to feel uncomfortable w/him taking out baby and maybe she's using the excuse of the baby being too young so that her feelings seem more credible to him.
Heck, I ran to the store yesterday w/out babe, was gone for maybe 25 min and baby was asleep w/daddy so didn't need me at all and I felt naked and lost w/out him (he's 9 months ).
She spent a couple of hours with daddy on Friday (3 weeks old) while I went to the store. She was fine. I fed her just before I left and she was just getting hungry as I got home. He did have some pumped milk just in case though. I was also a block away, and reachable by cell phone so I wasn't worried. I missed her like crazy, but the shopping got done to my standards.
As far as germs go I just do simple things like carry her, and wash my hands.
I just cringe when I see a brand new baby out...especially in places like Wal-Mart!
However, he's over seven months now and I am just now getting okay with leaving him for (very short) periods of time with trusted adults.
Letting anyone, father or no, take my baby away from me at 10 days for any amount of time? Over my dead body. Just the thought of that is making my heart race a little bit...
Loving wife and mama to my sweet little son (Fall 2008) and a beautiful baby girl (Fall 2010)
When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty. --George Bernard Shaw
you took him/her out of the house for their first outing? Mine was three days old, I wore her in a sling and she was perfectly safe. I have a friend whose wife insists that he can't take his daughter out for a quick father's day breakfast (they are separated) at a bagel shop because their daughter is only 10 days old. She says babies can't leave the house until they are at least a month, but preferably two months, old. FYI she is a nurse.
Just wondering your thoughts on this....
(excuse me if this is a repeat because I didn't read all the responses!)
DD1 was 6 days old the first time she went out for more than an hour. We went to church for 3 hours. DD2 was 10 days old the first time she was out for more than a couple of hours, again we went to church for 3 hours.
ETA- as for being without me DH took DD1 for 30 minutes when she was 3 days old to check in with his command. I was perfectly OK with it because she had just eaten and was fast asleep. Hes command was about 5 minutes from the apartment so if DD needed me it didn't take long to get home.
DD2 didn't leave my side after getting out of the NICU for the first 6 months. I still don't feel comfortable without her being by my side.