Sorry this is so long but I feel so helpless and I just need to vent a little. My DS Max is 3.5 months. He was and still is a colicky, excessively fussy baby. Just like everybody says, it started to get slowly better between 10-12 weeks, and we were all so happy about that. But the last two weeks it seems like a total regression. He has inconsolable screaming fits almost every day, often more than once a day. And in general he's just a malcontent, fussy baby. He does smile and laugh a lot and we have plenty of good times with him, but he so quickly descends into fussing and then sometimes full-blown screaming fits. There are good days and bad days, and on the really hard days nothing is good enough ever and all he does is fuss. all. day. long.
When he was younger we figured out it had a lot to do with overstimulation, but that no longer really feels right. He's been out of the womb for almost 4 months now and it seems like he is pretty used to all the daily things we do and the input he gets. We go out some but not all that much just to avoid overdoing it and in order not to miss naps. But throughout the day it's just a cycle of playing and then fussing and then doing something else and then fussing and then something else and more fussing. It seems he can't do anything for more than at most 20 minutes before fussing. This includes me wearing him, me playing with him, him playing alone, being in the bouncy seat, going in the garden or for a walk, or anything. DH and I are both getting really fed up with being the nonstop entertainment program~ I mean if it worked maybe we'd be more into it, but it never takes long before he gets bored or whatever it is and starts fussing and crying and screaming.
BTW he has been to all his well-baby checkups and had one this week even and he's fit as a fiddle and in fact very physically strong. It is also, I believe, not gas or stomach issues. He farts a few times a day like most babies, but unrelated to the crying, and I do give him gripe water out of desperation sometimes when he's screaming, but I really don't think it's a food/belly issue. He's also been to the osteopath 3x which helped some physical misalignments he had but not the crying. We have an appointment for Craniosacral work for him next week.
Sorry I'm going on forever here, but we've tried various approaches and it seems to be lately just getting worse not better.
I have to wonder when this is no longer colic and it's just his personality and he'll always somehow be dissatisfied. DH and I are really worried and of course wondering if we're doing something wrong or at least if there's anything we can do to help Max find some peace and happiness.
So, those who've btdt: how long does this colicky fussiness go on? I thought it was supposed to stop around 3 months, not get worse. At what point is it just his personality and he's just like that, and if so how do we deal with it? There are days we are tearing our hair out with frustration. I am ashamed to admit I have a couple times yelled at this poor innocent sweet little baby in my most frustrated moments.
I hate myself for that and immediately feel terrible and start crying myself when I see his innocent little face. I never want to yell at him again, I know how awful and wrong that is. In those moments I was so incredibly desperate. Yesterday it was so bad, I had to put him down while he was crying, go in the other room and scream into a pillow. I am so ashamed that I can't handle this, but sometimes I just reach my limit. Please hold the comments about I need professional help so as not to hurt him, or criticize me for yelling, I know how wrong it is and have already criticized myself plenty for it. I would never ever ever lay a hand on him and I know I need to find ways to contain my frustration and anger in the heat of the moment. In fact if you have tips on what helped you, I know every parent of a colic baby has felt that intense frustration, please share.
If you've read this far thank you so so much and TIA for any support you can offer, I am so desperate and at my wit's end here. I just want our little Max to be at peace, not all the time but more often than he currently is. How helpless I feel to guide him to that place if it's even possible, or to understand what this is.
When he was younger we figured out it had a lot to do with overstimulation, but that no longer really feels right. He's been out of the womb for almost 4 months now and it seems like he is pretty used to all the daily things we do and the input he gets. We go out some but not all that much just to avoid overdoing it and in order not to miss naps. But throughout the day it's just a cycle of playing and then fussing and then doing something else and then fussing and then something else and more fussing. It seems he can't do anything for more than at most 20 minutes before fussing. This includes me wearing him, me playing with him, him playing alone, being in the bouncy seat, going in the garden or for a walk, or anything. DH and I are both getting really fed up with being the nonstop entertainment program~ I mean if it worked maybe we'd be more into it, but it never takes long before he gets bored or whatever it is and starts fussing and crying and screaming.
BTW he has been to all his well-baby checkups and had one this week even and he's fit as a fiddle and in fact very physically strong. It is also, I believe, not gas or stomach issues. He farts a few times a day like most babies, but unrelated to the crying, and I do give him gripe water out of desperation sometimes when he's screaming, but I really don't think it's a food/belly issue. He's also been to the osteopath 3x which helped some physical misalignments he had but not the crying. We have an appointment for Craniosacral work for him next week.
Sorry I'm going on forever here, but we've tried various approaches and it seems to be lately just getting worse not better.
So, those who've btdt: how long does this colicky fussiness go on? I thought it was supposed to stop around 3 months, not get worse. At what point is it just his personality and he's just like that, and if so how do we deal with it? There are days we are tearing our hair out with frustration. I am ashamed to admit I have a couple times yelled at this poor innocent sweet little baby in my most frustrated moments.
I hate myself for that and immediately feel terrible and start crying myself when I see his innocent little face. I never want to yell at him again, I know how awful and wrong that is. In those moments I was so incredibly desperate. Yesterday it was so bad, I had to put him down while he was crying, go in the other room and scream into a pillow. I am so ashamed that I can't handle this, but sometimes I just reach my limit. Please hold the comments about I need professional help so as not to hurt him, or criticize me for yelling, I know how wrong it is and have already criticized myself plenty for it. I would never ever ever lay a hand on him and I know I need to find ways to contain my frustration and anger in the heat of the moment. In fact if you have tips on what helped you, I know every parent of a colic baby has felt that intense frustration, please share.
If you've read this far thank you so so much and TIA for any support you can offer, I am so desperate and at my wit's end here. I just want our little Max to be at peace, not all the time but more often than he currently is. How helpless I feel to guide him to that place if it's even possible, or to understand what this is.