"Spirited" or "high needs" babies...group? - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
#1 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 05:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
mrs.t's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NY
Posts: 396
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Hi everyone,

I have posted here about my 5 mo DS who falls into the spirited or high needs category, and a few of you have expressed that you have similar LO's. I just wanted to see if anyone is interested in starting a high needs baby group. I don't really know how groups work on mdc, but I see that there are threads in this 'life with a babe" forum that are specifically for babies born in certain months. Maybe we can just start our own thread? I think the support would be really helpful, I know I need it sometimes, and I thought it would be helpful to new mamas. Just reply here if you are interested, and if there is a more appropriate place for this group on mdc, let me know.

Mom to Kevin,bfinfant.gif : born naturally 4-7-10 nocirc.gif

mrs.t is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
#2 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 07:38 PM
 
braidmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Providence, RI
Posts: 146
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Love this idea! And I love "spirited" way more than "high needs."

femalesling.GIFfamilybed1.gif crafty Mama to Maxwell, born April 5, 2010 and partner & best friend to Dan <3

braidmama is offline  
#3 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 08:10 PM
 
1stTimeMama4-4-10's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 620
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Sign me up.

Happy fly-by-nursing1.giffamilybed2.giffemalesling.GIF, delayed/selective vaxxing, WOHM to DD1 4/10 diaper.gif, DD2 8/12 babygirl.gif and partner/wife for thirteen years to SAHD DHsuperhero.gif.  

1stTimeMama4-4-10 is offline  
#4 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 08:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
mrs.t's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NY
Posts: 396
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Great!!! Ok, I guess if I get a few more replies I'll just start a thread for us in this forum.

Mom to Kevin,bfinfant.gif : born naturally 4-7-10 nocirc.gif

mrs.t is offline  
#5 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 08:38 PM
 
Hannah32's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 454
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'd describe Sam as "spirited." I don't think I have it quite tough enough to merit the "high need" label, but Sam is bored easily and wants constant and different types of stimulation. He's very interested in the world. But he *hates* the lie-down stroller and he won't take a paci. Mom can only take so many miles in the sling.
Hannah32 is offline  
#6 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 08:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
mrs.t's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NY
Posts: 396
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I would describe DS as spirited as well. He's pretty happy most of the time, but he gets super frustrated when he can't do things and he needs CONSTANT stimulation. I was using the word "intense" since he was born.

Mom to Kevin,bfinfant.gif : born naturally 4-7-10 nocirc.gif

mrs.t is offline  
#7 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 09:21 PM
 
LeaPea's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Southern California
Posts: 145
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'm interested!!
LeaPea is offline  
#8 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 09:49 PM
 
MissNo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Virginia
Posts: 81
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Yes and YES!

Mom to two lovely girls, 4 and 3. SAHW/M in need of sleep.
MissNo is offline  
#9 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 10:28 PM
 
candelaria80's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 296
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hannah32 View Post
I'd describe Sam as "spirited." I don't think I have it quite tough enough to merit the "high need" label, but Sam is bored easily and wants constant and different types of stimulation. He's very interested in the world. But he *hates* the lie-down stroller and he won't take a paci. Mom can only take so many miles in the sling.
This exactly. If this qualifies then count us in.

Mama to Madelynn 8/16/2009 and awaiting buggy #2 March/2011 , partner to DH

candelaria80 is offline  
#10 of 30 Old 09-12-2010, 11:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
mrs.t's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: NY
Posts: 396
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Ok, great! I'll start the thread!

Mom to Kevin,bfinfant.gif : born naturally 4-7-10 nocirc.gif

mrs.t is offline  
#11 of 30 Old 09-25-2011, 05:56 PM
 
Zenmama1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 92
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Just wondering if this group was ever started and where I can find it

Zenmama1 is offline  
#12 of 30 Old 09-29-2011, 11:52 AM
 
luckiest's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: TX
Posts: 850
Mentioned: 30 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 45 Post(s)

Oh my gosh, yes.  It took me a very long time to realize that Felix has higher needs than most babies.  He is 10 months now, but has always needed constant human interaction, constant holding, talking, singing.  He has so much energy, constantly exploring (but only with me right next to him), he fights sleep, wakes often, doesn't transition well.  It's incredibly draining, and other moms really don't understand.  No, he really doesn't happily play with pots and pans while I cook breakfast.  He needs me down on the floor with him, also playing with pots and pans.  He demands it - he knows what he wants and is very vocal about it.  

 

I give him so much energy and touch and emotion all day, that at the end I'm completely spent and feel guilty for not being able to give my husband the attention I know he needs.  I've given myself all away to the baby, it's hard to summon the energy to be as present in our relationship as I used to be.

 

I thought I was crazy for the longest time, looking at other peoples' serene, content babies.  We don't even have moments of that.  Readin the Sears Fussy Baby Book totally changed my outlook. He knows what he wants, and he gets his needs fulfilled.  

 

Glad to hear from other people.  No fault of their own, but most moms really don't get it.

 




Living and loving in ATX with DH (of 7 years) and DS (3.5)
luckiest is online now  
#13 of 30 Old 09-29-2011, 01:03 PM
 
tjjazzy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,213
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

it's so hard to accept that other ppl just don't get it though! you want support so badly and no one understands.


wife to wonderful dh_malesling.GIF mama of three-DS1 born December 30, 2005 and DS2 born September 27, 2008 and one lovely little girl born September 7, 2011jumpers.gif

tjjazzy is offline  
#14 of 30 Old 10-11-2011, 08:03 PM
 
Zenmama1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 92
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by tjjazzy View Post

it's so hard to accept that other ppl just don't get it though! you want support so badly and no one understands.

You're right. I think in one of Dr. Sear's books he says to just stop talking about it. Because no one else gets it. So you just have to portray things in a positive light. Like the other day I was at a friends house and my DD wanted to nurse. I knew I would have to go out to the car to nurse her, because if there are people around she gets distracted which means frustration (and huge mess) for me. So I had to tell them that I actually preferred to go to my car, that I liked listening to the radio and it was very comfy. They thought I was crazy. But I just pretended like I really just loved nursing in my car. Of course while I was out there neighbors were driving by my car and peering in, so I really wasnt loving it. Lol. Oh well.
 

 

Zenmama1 is offline  
#15 of 30 Old 01-19-2012, 03:17 AM
 
missycoll's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 1
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Is this group now active? I have a 6 month old high needs baby....I would love to talk to another mamma about it. xo hugs

missycoll is offline  
#16 of 30 Old 01-23-2012, 03:56 AM
 
LaPaix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 31
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Also wondering if this group was ever started, surprising that there isn't a sub-forum dealing with it.


Mama to M. born 09/2011

 

     familybed1.gif bfinfant.gif

 

Keep calm & carry on treehugger.gif

LaPaix is offline  
#17 of 30 Old 01-23-2012, 04:06 PM
 
NeptuneRising's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 11
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I would be interested as well. There are so few people I can talk to about Charlie since I am surrounded by people who don't even know high needs babies exist. I would love to be a part of a support group for our spirited babies!

NeptuneRising is offline  
#18 of 30 Old 01-24-2012, 10:30 AM
 
lilith731's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I would love to join this conversation as well!  I'm pretty new here, but have a loving, spirited almost 6-month old preemie who would definitely benefit from her mama connecting with other like-minded mamas :)

lilith731 is offline  
#19 of 30 Old 01-24-2012, 02:06 PM
 
kanani's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 70
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

count me in! does anyone know if this group is active?

kanani is offline  
#20 of 30 Old 01-25-2012, 01:51 AM
 
LaPaix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 31
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Emailed Admin. and ask to create the group so will let you all know when I get a response :)


Mama to M. born 09/2011

 

     familybed1.gif bfinfant.gif

 

Keep calm & carry on treehugger.gif

LaPaix is offline  
#21 of 30 Old 01-25-2012, 11:30 PM
 
LaPaix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 31
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

So this is the response I got from Admin:

 

We can create a Group for high needs/spirited babies. Send me the name
you'd like to give the group and the usernames of two people who are
willing to serve as leaders for the group and I'll get it set up.

All the best
Cynthia

 

 

Any ideas for names - would anyone like to serve as a leader??


Mama to M. born 09/2011

 

     familybed1.gif bfinfant.gif

 

Keep calm & carry on treehugger.gif

LaPaix is offline  
#22 of 30 Old 01-27-2012, 06:21 PM
 
Zenmama1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 92
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
What does being a leader entail? I might be up for it

Zenmama1 is offline  
#23 of 30 Old 01-28-2012, 11:37 AM
 
Hymanroth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 105
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Meee!! I have a 5 mo old son and I REALLY want to be in this!!! I would love a group that understands and knows! Lol. 

 

Please let me know when I can be involved!

Hymanroth is offline  
#24 of 30 Old 01-31-2012, 05:06 AM
 
LaPaix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 31
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Okay, I'll ask Admin. what being a leader entails - we still have to think of a name, how about "The Spirited Child" or "Parenting the Spirited Baby (high-needs, colic)" - I was thinking it might be good to include colic in this category, my little one was very colicky in the early days and there is no place on MDC dedicated to this (I think)


Mama to M. born 09/2011

 

     familybed1.gif bfinfant.gif

 

Keep calm & carry on treehugger.gif

LaPaix is offline  
#25 of 30 Old 01-31-2012, 10:02 AM
 
onetwoten's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,935
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I'm in! Subbing so I don't miss group info. Our 2mo has reflux, has started teething, and is the pickiest baby I've ever come across. And I think she's got some of my sensory processing issues. Poor girl. 


Doula mama, medic daddy and Tenley Harper born naturally 11/29/11 delayedvax.gifbfinfant.giffemalesling.GIFcd.gif

onetwoten is offline  
#26 of 30 Old 01-31-2012, 05:38 PM
 
Zenmama1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 92
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I like "the spirited child" (high needs, colic). I think the term high needs is good to have in there somewhere because of Dr. Sears' popularity.

Also regarding the colic. My LO had sever colic too, but I would think that would fall under the health category, no? My dd's colic was due to a food sensitivity, and I know some babies have colic caused by reflux issues. I'm just mentioning this because high needs to me is more of a temperament category than health. But I'm not opposed to having colic thrown in there though. I know food sensitivities and high needs can go hand in hand. And Dealing with a colicky baby is definitely emotionally trying.
Zenmama1 is offline  
#27 of 30 Old 02-03-2012, 12:07 AM
 
LaPaix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 31
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

We couldn't find a medical reason for my daughter's colic, looking back it might stem from the fact that she was over tired, she would only nap for longer than 10 minutes if she was in her carrier and I was walking, and sometimes that didn't even work.


Mama to M. born 09/2011

 

     familybed1.gif bfinfant.gif

 

Keep calm & carry on treehugger.gif

LaPaix is offline  
#28 of 30 Old 02-13-2012, 11:37 AM
 
Zenmama1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 92
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I don't have a problem with putting colic in there smile.gif
Any updates?
Zenmama1 is offline  
#29 of 30 Old 02-14-2012, 11:06 PM
 
LaPaix's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 31
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Hi ladies, sorry - I have been very busy and forgot to post Admin's email, this is what being a leader entails, let me know if you are interested:

 

Basically it entails making sure discussions do not violate our forum
rules. Leaders must resolve any issues directly by asking members to
observe the rules and have them edit to remove anything of violation.
A leader is also responsible for removing members who are disruptive
to a group. If you choose to have the group set to Closed you would be
responsible for approving members as they request to join. You likely
do not need to check the group daily since you will have two leaders.
You work out the responsibilities between you as you decide best.
That's the gist of a leader's role. You can share that information
with the other potential leaders and let me know who will be the
second leader.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Mama to M. born 09/2011

 

     familybed1.gif bfinfant.gif

 

Keep calm & carry on treehugger.gif

LaPaix is offline  
#30 of 30 Old 02-21-2012, 06:34 PM
 
Zenmama1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 92
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I'll be the other leader unless someone else would like to be
Zenmama1 is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Drag and Drop File Upload
Drag files here to attach!
Upload Progress: 0
Options

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Mothering Forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.
User Name:
If you do not want to register, fill this field only and the name will be used as user name for your post.
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.
Password:
Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.
Email Address:

Log-in

Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



User Tag List

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off