Purple Crying - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 17 Old 10-26-2010, 03:27 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Not sure if this has been discussed here before - but has anyone been given this program or seen the ads for it?

It scares me a bit...does anyone else see the dangers?

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#2 of 17 Old 10-26-2010, 03:32 PM
 
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I definitely see the potential for parents to say "well they're supposed to cry so it's ok to put them down and ignore them"
But having had two newborns that did have periods of PURPLE crying I do wish someone had told me about it. I was SO sure there was something wrong with them and was tearing my hair out, crying hysterically trying to figure out why, even though I was doing everything Dr. Sears said and everything Happiest Baby on the Block said, my baby still wouldn't. stop. screaming.

It was awful and I was at least assured by the PURPLE crying article that I was not a terrible failure as a mother and there wasn't anything wrong with my baby. So yes, I can certainly see where it could be used as an excuse for neglect or very early CIO but for some of us it's very reassuring.

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#3 of 17 Old 10-26-2010, 03:35 PM
 
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One of my fb friends posted it today. Had never seen it before. Our daughter had 'colic' but it was food sensitivity and reflux. If a baby appears to be in pain, I think we should listen to that and not assume the cries have no cause. I think the campaign is encouraging neglect and is very irresponsible.

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#4 of 17 Old 10-26-2010, 03:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I think this program has the potential in this mainstream world to be VERY dangerous to babies.

I'm sure this has indeed saved a few babies from being injured by their parents out of frustration...but I wonder at the damage that could be done to those in need of medical attention.

This program has their heart in the right place, but the message is off or wrong. Yes, babies cry, but how about teaching coping skills to the parents instead of just telling them "it's normal - ignore it".

oh...their sleep advice is appalling!

" 2/3 of babies sleep thru the night at 12 weeks"

"Parenting which emphasizes responsiveness and physical contact with babies results in less crying in the first few weeks of infancy. But, when continued beyond 12 weeks of age, this form of care maintains infant night waking and signalling, the main kind of infant sleeping problem."

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#5 of 17 Old 10-27-2010, 09:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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This has become a very hot page on FB...there is also a counter page with great links.

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#6 of 17 Old 10-28-2010, 12:18 AM
 
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Never heard of it... Links please? I guess I can google it.

Cloth diapering, Babywearing, Breastfeeding first time mama! Our bundle of joy was born June 15, 2010
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#7 of 17 Old 10-28-2010, 12:37 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Never heard of it... Links please? I guess I can google it.

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Website (includes links to the videos)

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#8 of 17 Old 10-28-2010, 07:28 AM
 
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Its odd though isn't it... (apart from VERY high needs babies or babies with reflux/colic - becasue I know, despite doing everything right, there are babies out there that just cry!).... in many many other cultures where babies are held continiously after the birth - they just don't cry. At all. I personally find it odd to assume that it is normal for a baby to cry for hours. It seems to only happen in our 'culture'. Why? (I have a few clear reasons in my head! lol)
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#9 of 17 Old 10-28-2010, 04:17 PM
 
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The Period of Purple Crying videos are designed to prevent Shaken Baby syndrome. It specifically says that if you are at your wit's end you should put your baby in a safe place and yes, go away and calm down. I think we would all agree that this would be preferable to a shaken baby.

I think most parents have been super frustrated and at least reached a point where they can * partially understand* how it is possible for a loving parent to get too frustrated with a baby.

I am all for the Purple crying campaign as i think education does save lives.

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#10 of 17 Old 11-05-2010, 02:50 PM
 
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I, for one, was very relieved when I read through the campaign. I also felt as though they were giving me hope that it wouldn't last forever. That's what came through for me the most: there is an end to the purple crying. My third baby was reflux-y and I sought help because I could tell he was in pain. My second and fourth babies were just angry 6 week olds.

I don't know that it will encourage neglect either. A crying baby held in mother's arms releases less cortisol (stress hormone) than a baby crying alone. There is still reason to hold your baby even if he/she cries.

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#11 of 17 Old 11-05-2010, 05:38 PM
 
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The Period of PURPLE Crying begins at about 2 weeks of age and continues until about 3-4 months... ...All babies go through this Period it is just that during this time some can cry a lot, some far less, but they all do go through it.
They all do? Because mine is 1 1/2 months and not showing ANY of the signs they talk about. She doesnt cry. She cried at birth and again at her PKU test. Now, she fusses. If she fusses, I feed her. If she still fusses I change her diaper. If she STILL fusses, I feed her again. At this point, she falls alseep.

Pretty sure that means she was either hungry, wet, hungry, or tired. Usually hungry, girl loves to eat.

Of course I am only blessed with this one, DS used to cry in such a way that I almost thought he enjoyed crying just for the heck of it.

But I sure as heck would not say EVERY baby goes through it.

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#12 of 17 Old 11-05-2010, 05:56 PM
 
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I only had one (out of four) that went through the looong 3 months of crying. I guess it would be called purple crying. The other three - nope. So no, not ALL babies go through it.

ETA: In fact, my first and third cried so little in their babyhoods that DH and I would get startled when they WOULD cry. It just didn't happen often.
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#13 of 17 Old 11-05-2010, 06:06 PM
 
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My state apparently has a pilot program where EVERY expectant mother is given the video and must watch it.

The video is disturbing, uncomfortable, depressing, and very hard to watch, imo. That said, I feel that the overarching message is positive and helpful for people who need it. My summary would be this:

Sometimes your baby will cry and you won't know what to do to help. It's very very stressful, and it does not mean you are a bad parent if you get upset or can't figure out what is wrong. Sometimes babies cry even if they are fed, clean, warm, and healthy. Whatever you do, do not shake the baby. It's ok to take a break.

I do not think that it encourages neglect.

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#14 of 17 Old 11-05-2010, 06:08 PM
 
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Originally Posted by redvlagrl View Post
The Period of Purple Crying videos are designed to prevent Shaken Baby syndrome. It specifically says that if you are at your wit's end you should put your baby in a safe place and yes, go away and calm down. I think we would all agree that this would be preferable to a shaken baby.

I think most parents have been super frustrated and at least reached a point where they can * partially understand* how it is possible for a loving parent to get too frustrated with a baby.

I am all for the Purple crying campaign as i think education does save lives.
This.

Well put, mama!

Every family with a new baby in BC is given this video, either by their public health nurse, ob/gyn, or midwife. My partner and I watched it and were freaked out. We kept waiting for it to happen, and it never did, thankfully. However, watching the video encouraged us to have a plan in place, should it occur.

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#15 of 17 Old 11-06-2010, 02:02 AM
 
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They gave us this video at the hospital last week when we had our baby. I didn't watch it.
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#16 of 17 Old 11-06-2010, 08:51 AM
 
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Originally Posted by MaerynPearl View Post

But I sure as heck would not say EVERY baby goes through it.
I agree. V was an especially easy infant and 0-6 months she would cry only if something was wrong and correctable (though she gets more challenging with time) but I bet it's common enough for the experts to make a blanket statement that it's normal and all babies do it. Knowing that it's normal and common may also help alleviate the breaking-point stress shakers can get to.

When I was pregnant, ALL of our <30 yr old friends with babies and young children (though, not surprisingly, none of our close family, which makes sense as both of our families are really quite mellow and patient) talked at great length about putting the baby someplace safe so you don't throw her against the wall. We were lucky, I guess, but, to this day, I've NEVER felt the urge to shake her, not even close. I think if she had been high-needs early it would have been a different situation, though.

Doctors aren't out to kill you or your children. Childbirth isn't inherently safe. Science is actually smarter than your intuition. Lighten up. Use sunscreen.

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#17 of 17 Old 11-06-2010, 09:23 AM
 
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I have never heard of this but the message to put your baby in the crib and walk away for a little bit if you are getting irritated is a really good one and I hope every parent gets this.
Maybe it was the part I missed in the hospital because I never heard of Purple Crying, they let me skip the class that was strongly suggested to attend before checking out. (I have 4 kids so they said I could probably teach it, lol)

When I read about the abused babies and shaken babies just around my region of the state, frustration of crying is almost always mentioned.
It's so horrible and heartbreaking to hear about it and I think sometimes when your baby is just fussing and crying you forget to try everything like taking a walk outside or something.

I never had this with any of my babies except for DD1 and it wasn't as much as the examples here.
Every evening she would fuss and cry for about an hour or two and I remember getting such a stressed feeling, I would break out in a sweat and sometimes start crying myself.
I found out that putting her in the stroller and walking for the entire hour was the answer. I couldn't wear her, I thought that would be the solution and I was so surprised that it wasn't, it had to be the stroller or it wouldn't help.
if it was cold I would bundle her up and she would stop crying almost immediately as soon as I put her in. Then the whole time she just looked up at me and almost looked relieved. I don't know why but I'm so glad it worked!
After this period, she really did stop and loved being worn, etc...

My sister had 1 baby like the purple crying example and he was tough for her. I used to just take him for a while so she could get out of the house and it worked for us.

I'm very glad this is out there. I really don't like the sleep section though!

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