Isobel co-slept with us until she was about a year old, then we transitioned her to a crib because I got pregnant and had difficulty sleeping with a kicking baby in the bed. First the crib was in our room, then we moved it into her room. She's been sleeping in her room since she was about 14 mo. I too was instructed to wean her - at 13 mo (because of pregnancy issues).
Our policy was to not leave her to cry in the crib. No CIO for us. So, we took turns sitting with her until she fell asleep. As time progressed and I got more pregnant, Daddy would often sit with her reading until she went to sleep.
Bed time has always been a bit difficult - Isobel rarely wants to get into the crib to go to bed. If I stay in there with her, she'll be upset for a long time. If daddy goes in, she usually settles down more quickly and will drop off to sleep.
Recently, and I can't say when it got so much worse, she really, really fights going to bed - jumping up and down, screaming - she'll get so upset, she'll be up for 45-90 minutes before she drops off. Bedtime is getting later and later.
During nap time - she'll do the same thing. I put her down for a nap when she gets cranky and demonstrates what I call 'tired' behavior. I put her down, give her a kiss, tell her I'm going downstairs and will come back when she wakes up from her nap, then I leave the room. Usually, she'll be upset for a few minutes and then will drop off to sleep. Yes, I know this goes against what DH and I decided about letting her cry - but, If I stay in there she'll stay awake for 30-90 minutes and will be upset for a longer than 5-10 minutes because she wants me to hold her (translation - she wants to get out and play).
Last night I was sitting with her and she settled down after about 5 minutes - she'll lay on her back and sing to herself, arrange her blankets, etc., but as soon as she hears me move in the chair, she looks at me and says (in her eyes), "don't even think about leaving the room." I stayed with her for about 15 minutes, then I heard my son crying to eat, so I went downstairs and got him, went back into dd's room and fed him. I was there for another 20 or so minutes (and starving at this point since I didn't have any dinner). DD had settled down nicely but was still very awake - and then I got up and told her that I had to go downstairs, goodnight, etc. And left the room. She was REALLY upset. Jumping down, screaming, crying, etc. I started to feel like she was manipulating me.
I can't take this anymore. It's killing me. I need your help. I am not an advocate of CIO, however I guess what I've been doing is CIO. Please help me figure something out.
One thing I was thinking about was whether her diet could affect her sleeping habits. Could for example, consumption of refined sugar after 4pm affect her sleep?
I think I've lost control of her diet. First grandmother wanted to give her graham crakers, ok. Now we also have animal crakers, TJ's alphabet cookies and another variety of TJ's cookies. She also gets strawberry or chocolate powder in her milk (only way I've been able to get her to drink milk). She's a grazer - weighs 23lbs - doctor told me at her 18mo appt if she didn't gain weight/grow next time, she'd have to get some tests!
She prefers fruit and carbs to protein - and out of desperation, I think the number of cookies she consumes has risen. My MIL maintains that 'fat' people eat a lot of carbs, so Isobel should have unrestricted access to carbs.
Her diet has become less varied - mac-n-cheese, hot dogs, scrambled eggs, spaghetti, sometimes almond butter/jelly or peanut butter/jelly - but rarely. LOTS of fruit - grapes, bananas, raisins, apple, apple-sauce (no sugar added), cantelope, watermelon, avacado. She also loves corn and peas. Right now she's in a milk and yoghurt phase - will ask for yoghurt and eat anwhere from nothing to 1.5 containers of yobaby.
We don't eat sit-down dinners together because my husband gets home anywhere from 7:45-9:30pm.
So - here are some questions:
Can you help me figure out how to make sleep time less awful?
Could it be her diet?
Should I restrict refined sugars completely?
Is there any other way I should modify her diet that might work?
Should I establish an earlier bed-time routine despite daddy's late schedule so that she and I can eat together?
Will she eat more if I am sitting down eating right next to her?
HELP ME!
Thank you!
Deb
Our policy was to not leave her to cry in the crib. No CIO for us. So, we took turns sitting with her until she fell asleep. As time progressed and I got more pregnant, Daddy would often sit with her reading until she went to sleep.
Bed time has always been a bit difficult - Isobel rarely wants to get into the crib to go to bed. If I stay in there with her, she'll be upset for a long time. If daddy goes in, she usually settles down more quickly and will drop off to sleep.
Recently, and I can't say when it got so much worse, she really, really fights going to bed - jumping up and down, screaming - she'll get so upset, she'll be up for 45-90 minutes before she drops off. Bedtime is getting later and later.
During nap time - she'll do the same thing. I put her down for a nap when she gets cranky and demonstrates what I call 'tired' behavior. I put her down, give her a kiss, tell her I'm going downstairs and will come back when she wakes up from her nap, then I leave the room. Usually, she'll be upset for a few minutes and then will drop off to sleep. Yes, I know this goes against what DH and I decided about letting her cry - but, If I stay in there she'll stay awake for 30-90 minutes and will be upset for a longer than 5-10 minutes because she wants me to hold her (translation - she wants to get out and play).
Last night I was sitting with her and she settled down after about 5 minutes - she'll lay on her back and sing to herself, arrange her blankets, etc., but as soon as she hears me move in the chair, she looks at me and says (in her eyes), "don't even think about leaving the room." I stayed with her for about 15 minutes, then I heard my son crying to eat, so I went downstairs and got him, went back into dd's room and fed him. I was there for another 20 or so minutes (and starving at this point since I didn't have any dinner). DD had settled down nicely but was still very awake - and then I got up and told her that I had to go downstairs, goodnight, etc. And left the room. She was REALLY upset. Jumping down, screaming, crying, etc. I started to feel like she was manipulating me.
I can't take this anymore. It's killing me. I need your help. I am not an advocate of CIO, however I guess what I've been doing is CIO. Please help me figure something out.
One thing I was thinking about was whether her diet could affect her sleeping habits. Could for example, consumption of refined sugar after 4pm affect her sleep?
I think I've lost control of her diet. First grandmother wanted to give her graham crakers, ok. Now we also have animal crakers, TJ's alphabet cookies and another variety of TJ's cookies. She also gets strawberry or chocolate powder in her milk (only way I've been able to get her to drink milk). She's a grazer - weighs 23lbs - doctor told me at her 18mo appt if she didn't gain weight/grow next time, she'd have to get some tests!
Her diet has become less varied - mac-n-cheese, hot dogs, scrambled eggs, spaghetti, sometimes almond butter/jelly or peanut butter/jelly - but rarely. LOTS of fruit - grapes, bananas, raisins, apple, apple-sauce (no sugar added), cantelope, watermelon, avacado. She also loves corn and peas. Right now she's in a milk and yoghurt phase - will ask for yoghurt and eat anwhere from nothing to 1.5 containers of yobaby.
We don't eat sit-down dinners together because my husband gets home anywhere from 7:45-9:30pm.
So - here are some questions:
Can you help me figure out how to make sleep time less awful?
Could it be her diet?
Should I restrict refined sugars completely?
Is there any other way I should modify her diet that might work?
Should I establish an earlier bed-time routine despite daddy's late schedule so that she and I can eat together?
Will she eat more if I am sitting down eating right next to her?
HELP ME!
Thank you!
Deb