9.5 month old who never--NEVER--naps - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 7 Old 01-29-2012, 12:20 PM - Thread Starter
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I don't know what to do.  He'll only sleep for 20 min., wake up, and he's raring to go. 


I nurse him and he falls asleep while I'm doing that.  I go to lay him down, sometimes he'll stay asleep (20 min), othertimes he'll wake up.  If he wakes up, I'll try to nurse him until he falls asleep again and put him down.  Again, sometimes it works and he sleeps for 20 min, othertimes he wakes up and is wide awake.  About once every 2 weeks he will sleep for 1-3 hours, but it's very rare.


This happens with both AM and PM naps.


He sleeps from 6:30pm-5:30am.


So, 11 hours of sleep at night and about 40 min of daytime sleep.  It's awful, he's exhausted.


I've tried laying next to him until he's asleep, he just cries and cries and cries.  I have him swaddled, I have a white noise machine, I have the room blacked out.


In the meantime he has a 4-year-old sister whose brain rots away as she watches TV for 40-80 min per day while I fruitlessly try to get him to nap.


Suggestions?  He's exhausted and the guilt I feel is, literally, making me sick.

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#2 of 7 Old 01-29-2012, 02:11 PM
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For now I would suggest letting him sleep on you.  Just hold him.  I know this may sound confining but I think it will help him get those longer stretches he needs.  You can wear him or hold him.  As he gets older it will be easier to transfer him to a bed or something but I think you need to get that new sleep pattern going right now.


It seems strange and  inconvenient, but take advantage of the rest and see if it helps.

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#3 of 7 Old 01-29-2012, 03:42 PM
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i agree with youngfrankenstein... i know you will have a 4yo running around while you hold him for his naps but she is already doing that while all you do is try to get him to sleep. my almost 10mo is just like this. he is my first, so i have an easier time just laying with him once he falls asleep but the more sleep he gets the better the rest of the sleep is. as more and more time goes on he sleeps on his own better and better. i also wear him in the Ergo for plenty of naps when i can't lay down with him, this way i get stuff done around the house. i have to get him to sleep in a darkish room with white noise until he falls asleep but then i can do stuff in a well lit room with medium noise. he sometimes stirs around the half hour mark so i go to a dim place with less noise and bounce a little and he usually falls back asleep for another half hour.

i know this doesn't sound ideal, but i believe this is just what my DS needs - it's just him, i don't think i'd have luck with anything else. we had a sitter once who used to be a DCP, she was convinced that she could get him to sleep another way... nope. she couldn't believe it. she sure did get him to sleep in the ergo tho'.

i know how draining it can be for DC naps to take so much of your time and energy but i'm just looking forward to the day that naps drop from 2 to 1 and then to none. i'm sure when i look back, the time spent won't seem so bad... and i'll probably miss very much spending hours a week laying in bed beside him, watching him sleep while i read, or surf the web and watch videos on my iPad (with headphones).

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#4 of 7 Old 01-30-2012, 07:38 AM
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nak (naptime!) 2 of my four children had to be held during naps. this youngest won't even nap laying in bed with me so here i sit in the rocking chair 3-4 times a day. i have to rock constantly and pat her bottom half the time. it really is very inconvenient but is better than what you're doing by fighting it. i wish to myself everyday that she'd nap alone so i can clean, cook, do stuff with the other kids. the only time she'll sleep alone is the first nighttime sleep, i can put her down and she'll sleep up to 3 hours. i just keep this in mind..."this, too, shall pass". mom told me that during my high-needs child and it's true, as much as we hate hearing it. this is #4 for me and i sure don't have it all together so don't feel too bad :)

drowning in hormones with 4 daughters and an understanding, loving hubby. also some dogs. my life is crazy and we are always learning.

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#5 of 7 Old 01-30-2012, 07:44 AM
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also, other ideas...make sure he is fully asleep...not making faces or noises. it can take half an hour or more for than to go into deep enough sleep to be moved around. also wanted to say that amount of tv you mentioned is not much. i wouldn't feel guilty about that little.

drowning in hormones with 4 daughters and an understanding, loving hubby. also some dogs. my life is crazy and we are always learning.

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#6 of 7 Old 02-14-2012, 02:16 PM
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Sounds just like my son. It's so frustrating! We just wear him for naps as I would rather him get the sleep he needs rather than be cranky all the time. My son is only 4 1/2 months old and I look forward to the day he does not need naps anymore. I know it sounds really inconvenient for you, but at least by wearing him the Ergo you can get stuff done around the house. I am teacher so I do my lesson planning and correct papers on the weekend when my son is sleeping in my Ergo. Once in a while I'll lie down with him for a nap and sometimes it works. It's just that I have to be there during the whole duration of the nap. One trick my husband taught me is to put the pacifier in, pull a blanket over baby for a few minutes as he falls asleep. Then remove the blanket. If we wakes in the middle of the nap, put the blanket over him again. Something about the darkness puts him back to sleep. I don't know if that will help. Is your baby still taking two naps?

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#7 of 7 Old 02-15-2012, 08:21 AM
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I think napping in a carrier/sling on you may help. It common in western culture to separate baby from mother but not in 90% of the world, where babies never sleep alone. Another idea, lie him down somewhere central to activity, so that he knows you can hear and smell you nearby, and knows you are right there and he is not alone.

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