Can a 3.5 month old throw a temper tantrum? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 11 Old 04-29-2013, 11:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
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So my DS got super angry today while I was preparing to nurse him after his nap. He'd eaten right before the nap, so he wasn't starving, but he was not a happy camper. His fussing quickly escalated into a fit I'd never seen from him before. I held him and talked to him calmly and firmly, but didn't start nursing him until he'd more or less calmed down (about five minutes of angry screaming--not hurting or hungry screaming). I praised him when he calmed down and immediately put him to the breast.

Was this an okay way to handle this? I really wasn't expecting tantrums for a few more months....
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#2 of 11 Old 04-29-2013, 11:45 AM
 
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I think you handled it fine but honestly don't think it would have made a difference in how it was handled... they don't start understanding cause/effect until much much later and certainly don't understand any kind of discipline now so it won't necessarily effect how he'll behave in the same situation next time. Right now all they know is "if hungry then scream". I don't think they have the capacity to be angry at this age, what happened was probably that you soothed him enough to quiet him down temporarily until you fed him.

My son is turning 13 months old in a few days and just now starting tantrums. If I take away something he shouldn't be playing with, you'd swear I just kicked him or something... doesn't matter how gently I take it away or try to "trade" for something better, there will be a meltdown.

I could be wrong, but I say at 3.5 months, if he wants boob, give him boob :) (You could argue that that's why my son throws tantrums now but I doubt either way at this age he'd have the self control to be ok with not having his way).

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#3 of 11 Old 04-29-2013, 12:41 PM
 
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How long was the nap?  Even if it was only an hour, baby very well could have been ravenously hungry by the time nap ended. Next time, I would just go straight to the boob.


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#4 of 11 Old 04-29-2013, 12:46 PM
 
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Yeah its not a behavior you can really deal with. I don;t think its a tantrum its normal for babies this age to get this way when food is not coming as fast as they would like,gas, tired  or whatever. Its normal and not a behavioral thing more of an " I DONT UNDERSTAND WHATS GOING ON!" While they figure it all out thing. I would not treat him like he is throwing a tantrum.

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#5 of 11 Old 04-29-2013, 12:57 PM
 
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Originally Posted by blessedwithboys View Post

How long was the nap?  Even if it was only an hour, baby very well could have been ravenously hungry by the time nap ended. Next time, I would just go straight to the boob.

Agreed. Offer it straight away because crying is often a late sign of hunger.
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#6 of 11 Old 04-30-2013, 04:54 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Asiago View Post


Agreed. Offer it straight away because crying is often a late sign of hunger.

I agree. My policy for infants is to give them whatever they want, because at that age what they want is what they need. I nurse on demand, even if I logically think he couldn't possibly need to eat again. 


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#7 of 11 Old 04-30-2013, 05:52 AM
 
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I was just thinking about this thread again this morning... The "fit" could have been any number of things other than hunger. He could have recognized something in the room he was never able to see before (their eyesight is improving daily at this point), and maybe it scared him. Maybe he woke up and didn't recognize where he was and got scared. Perhaps he had an itch or what he was wearing was uncomfortable when he woke up? My son, for the first few months, used to freak out when a burp was coming (it was a good indicator for me how long to keep tapping lol) the more scared and confused he was, the closer the burp was hehe
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#8 of 11 Old 04-30-2013, 06:41 AM
 
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FYI., some breastfed babies don't like being burped. I never burped my son after nursing. If I had tried, he would have complained!
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#9 of 11 Old 04-30-2013, 06:54 AM
 
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I wish I knew that when my son was born! My mom used to harass me about it and it drove me nuts... I never did it half the time either because I was either too tired/lazy/forgot and it didn't look like it made much difference to him anyway... The odd time I did it though, I felt like I was a better mom because I was doing it "properly" lol

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#10 of 11 Old 05-02-2013, 06:41 PM
 
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Can I ask why would you talk to him while he was screaming and didn't offer to nurse first? This is an honest question, I don't mean to offend.

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#11 of 11 Old 05-02-2013, 07:00 PM
 
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At that age they can only communicate distress and won't really understand any kind of discipline. He's not really having a tantrum, he was just communicating the only way babies can: crying. If I were you I would just go straight to the nursing and don't try to teach him anything. He won't understand anyway.

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