When to pierce ears? - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 26 Old 05-21-2013, 02:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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What is a good age to pierce a girl's ears? My DD is currently 7 weeks old, and I'm not running to do it tomorrow, but would like to know what is appropriate health-wise, and what precautions, and things to do b/f and after.

 

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#2 of 26 Old 05-21-2013, 03:02 PM
 
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To be honest, I would wait until she is old enough to decide for herself that she wants to have it done and to understand the pain involved. My sister had hers pierced as a baby, and my mother has never forgiven herself because she said it was totally horrifying. I'm not trying to be judgmental at all but I would strongly urge you not to inflict unnecessary pain on her for the sake of aesthetics. I'm sure you can find some cute clip on earrings for her!

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#3 of 26 Old 05-21-2013, 03:05 PM
 
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Well I just tried to look up clip-ons for babies but it looks like they are a choking hazard, which makes sense. I still think it's best to wait. :-)

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#4 of 26 Old 05-21-2013, 03:15 PM
 
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My DH really wanted to have dd's ears pierced and my MIL actually sent some cute little newborn-sized earrings and was rather disappointed when we didn't use them. But the way i see it, there is plenty of work for us as parents during the first few months, the last thing i want to do is add new piercing care to that list, especially if she happened to have a reaction or develop an infection (my ears are really sensitive to earrings, so i figure dd's might too.)

Anyhow, DH and i talked about it and decided that if she later decides that she wants them it will be a good opportunity to teach her personal responsibility and self-care for the healing period.
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#5 of 26 Old 05-21-2013, 05:48 PM
 
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I got DDs ears pierced at 5 months. She cried pretty bad at the time, and everyone in the mall looked at me like I deserve the worst mom of the year award. She did fine with them till she turned 3 or 4, then they got really sensitive all of a sudden. She hasn't
wore earrings in a few years. If I had to do it over I'd let her decide.

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#6 of 26 Old 05-21-2013, 05:59 PM
 
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I'd wait. My mom had mine pierced as a baby and I always had issues with them. They didn't stay in the right spot as my ears grew and I had to get them repierced anyways when I wanted to use earrings. They got irritated a lot when I was a kid and I didnt want anything to do with earrings until my 20's because I had a bad association with them. There are lots of other pretty jewelry a young girl can wear that don't involve piercings.
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#7 of 26 Old 05-23-2013, 01:59 PM
 
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I'd wait. My mom waited and I asked for them when I was 4. She squirmed more at the piercing place than I did! My parents had to make sure I took care of them, but you would have to do that with a baby as well. I've never had a problem with them. That's what we're planning to do with all our kids.

 

Not all kids want them, though. I have a friend whose mom kept trying to convince her to pierce her ears but she just had no interest in it- she's in college and still doesn't.

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#8 of 26 Old 05-23-2013, 02:11 PM
 
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I know in many cultures it is pretty normal to pierce a baby's ears (to make them look more feminine??). I think my cousins had theirs done as infants (European born). My husband is from Central America and it is pretty standard there as well. He said he wasn't really into it, if I wanted to wait and let our daughter decide...so we did...and believe me, a lot of people thought she was a boy because she had no hair until she was almost 3! Weird because she has the thickest head of hair now!  He kept asking if she liked earrings and she said she wanted it done around age 4. I took her to the mall and she freaked out, so we waited. A few months later she said it again, so we did it. She cried pretty bad. I could tell one hurt more than the other because it got really red. I got some ice to put on it, and she was fine in a few minutes. Honestly, I think she was a bit young. They aren't balls, they are little flowers, and they do get caught on things occasionally. One time while rough-housing with cousins, one ripped out, but the ear didn't bleed or tear. She was so freaked out that she didn't want to put it back in and it was a major drama. No one is allowed to touch her earrings and she says she will never take them out. We have never taken them out to clean them in the two years she has had them!! Yuck! So far, no irritation or infection, so I guess it's OK to never take them out??? I got mine when I was 7 and they got infected and closed up. I may have tried to get them pierced one other time shortly after that...don't remember. A friend of mine had a piercing gun and did them for me when I was a teen, and I think that was the last time I had them done. I keep the same studs in every day and rarely take them out to clean them. I'm just not a big jewelry person. 

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#9 of 26 Old 05-23-2013, 02:13 PM
 
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I'd wait. I got mine done at 16, and did it the way I wanted to: all on one side. The point is, it was my choice to make. 


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#10 of 26 Old 05-23-2013, 07:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks everyone.
 

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#11 of 26 Old 05-23-2013, 09:34 PM
 
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No one is allowed to touch her earrings and she says she will never take them out. We have never taken them out to clean them in the two years she has had them!! Yuck! So far, no irritation or infection, so I guess it's OK to never take them out???

I'm horrible at taking mine out to change/clean them, I've easily left them in for years at a time, and have never had a problem. There's some residue (no idea what it is) that builds up on them over time, but it's a tiny amount that you have to look for to notice. If she ever does change them, make sure that you clean the earrings before you put them away. Definitely keep an eye on them to make sure there's no signs of problems, but that should be okay.


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#12 of 26 Old 05-24-2013, 05:27 PM
 
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I used to work at Claire's when I was 16 and pierced ears. It was always the worst piercing babies and toddlers. A lot of the time they end up taking the earring out then you gotta pierce is again. Also ears grow at different rates and even IF it looks even when it's done, as they grow it will become uneven. If wait for the child to be old enough to clean their ears themselves. If you want earrings for pictures just use magnetic ones. Then take them off afterwards.
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#13 of 26 Old 05-27-2013, 08:56 PM
 
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Respectfully, a child should have their ears pierced when they can consent to modifying their body and take care of any physical challenges associated with it. Anything else is an assault on their person.

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#14 of 26 Old 05-28-2013, 11:32 PM
 
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Not until they're old enough to want them and ask.
 


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#15 of 26 Old 05-29-2013, 12:57 AM
 
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I'd wait until they're old enough to articulate pain and can safely use more pain relief methods. If you get a baby's ears pierced, you won't know if she's crying because her ears hurt or for one of the other bazillion reasons babies cry.

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#16 of 26 Old 05-29-2013, 04:42 AM
 
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I got my daughter's pierced when she was 5 - because she asked. Big mistake. She wasn't old enough to take care of them herself, and the weeks she was with her Dad, they didn't get taken care of. One was taken out, had to be repierced. I finally left it alone until she was older (12ish?) and she could take responsibility for it herself. 

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#17 of 26 Old 06-01-2013, 05:08 PM
 
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You could ask your pediatrician. Some docs are willing to do it and it's better than getting it done with a piercing gun (which can damage the tissue). Or you could call a professional piercer (who doesn't use a gun).

 

My nine year old daughter is planning to get hers' done for her tenth birthday; we have a friend who used to work as a piercer who is going to do it.


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#18 of 26 Old 06-07-2013, 09:02 PM
 
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I also will wait until she is old enough to want pierced ears and ask for them.

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#19 of 26 Old 06-21-2013, 11:10 AM
 
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Originally Posted by skycheattraffic View Post

I'd wait. My mom had mine pierced as a baby and I always had issues with them. They didn't stay in the right spot as my ears grew and I had to get them repierced anyways when I wanted to use earrings. They got irritated a lot when I was a kid and I didnt want anything to do with earrings until my 20's because I had a bad association with them. There are lots of other pretty jewelry a young girl can wear that don't involve piercings.

 

I had mine pierced as a baby, and I never considered it a problem, in fact, I loved being one of the first girls in school with *real* earrings. However, I also noticed that as I grew older, the holes migrated to the point were they were uneven and waaay too close to my head. Most people probably don't notice, but it still bugs me because when I wear certain styles, it scratches my skin behind my ears. In my culture (El Salvadoran latino) it is very common to do to babies, and all my cousins pierced their daughter's ears. 

 

I think I will wait until she is older though, like maybe 7 or 8. 

 

Either way, NEVER use a piercing gun. They are impossible to sanitize properly, and as someone pointed out earlier, often wielded by inexperienced retail clerks. Go to a doctor who uses a needle, or to a professional piercer with a good reputation. 


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#20 of 26 Old 06-27-2013, 08:12 PM
 
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I think I was 7 when I had mine done and I think that was a good age for me. My mom waited till I pestered her about it for a while and she felt I could follow the care instructions. Me and two of my girlfriends at the time went to get ours done together, it was a very neat experience, made us feel all grown up. orngbiggrin.gif I think it's a good idea to wait until the child can wait and ask for it (if they do).

 

Also, stay away from piercing guns if you can, getting it done with a needle is much better (sterile and by a professional, of course!).

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#21 of 26 Old 06-28-2013, 06:20 PM
 
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I was 13 when I had mine done and that may seem old but my parents believed that a girl should have a mile stone to mark the begining of being a woman. So I only used clip ons until then.

I have decided to do the same with my daughters for several reasons.: first I like the idea that kids should be kids and I think we are in such a hurry to make them like little adults,second I like the idea of them feeling special as they start to change into young woman,the third reason is for health reasons as my daughters wouldn't I feel remember to clean and take care to prevent infection and a friend of mine has a mutalated ear from combing her hair and catching her earing when she was little(lets face it kids are not as carful as we would like)

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#22 of 26 Old 06-29-2013, 08:21 AM
 
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I was 13 when I had mine done and that may seem old but my parents believed that a girl should have a mile stone to mark the begining of being a woman. So I only used clip ons until then.
I have decided to do the same with my daughters for several reasons.: first I like the idea that kids should be kids and I think we are in such a hurry to make them like little adults,second I like the idea of them feeling special as they start to change into young woman,the third reason is for health reasons as my daughters wouldn't I feel remember to clean and take care to prevent infection and a friend of mine has a mutalated ear from combing her hair and catching her earing when she was little(lets face it kids are not as carful as we would like)

That's really interesting. I never thought of piercings as womanly rather than girly. I definitely wore more and crazier earrings as a girl than I do now!

However, I love the idea of a ritual to mark womanhood, and this is a good one.

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#23 of 26 Old 06-29-2013, 06:37 PM
 
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You could ask your pediatrician. Some docs are willing to do it and it's better than getting it done with a piercing gun (which can damage the tissue). Or you could call a professional piercer (who doesn't use a gun).

My nine year old daughter is planning to get hers' done for her tenth birthday; we have a friend who used to work as a piercer who is going to do it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mom2threegrls View Post

I was 13 when I had mine done and that may seem old but my parents believed that a girl should have a mile stone to mark the begining of being a woman. So I only used clip ons until then.
I have decided to do the same with my daughters for several reasons.: first I like the idea that kids should be kids and I think we are in such a hurry to make them like little adults,second I like the idea of them feeling special as they start to change into young woman,the third reason is for health reasons as my daughters wouldn't I feel remember to clean and take care to prevent infection and a friend of mine has a mutalated ear from combing her hair and catching her earing when she was little(lets face it kids are not as carful as we would like)

I was very much of the same belief as momto3 on waiting until my dds were women to allow them to get their ears pierced. There has always been something odd to me about piercing little girls ears, it's like putting little girls in two piece bathing suits, if that makes sense. I wanted them to make decisions about their own bodies when it came to piercing. And having some familiarity with body modification, I wanted them to have their ears pierced with a needle by a pro AND I wanted to make sure that they were able to understand the pain and care that would be involved.

So fast forward to last fall when dd1 (8ys) was for the millionth time asking me to allow her to get her ears pierced. I had explained that it would be painful, take a long time to heal, and require a lot of care. I had also explained that I thought she was too young. Over and over. And then I started to think about it. Teaching my kids that they have autonomy over their own bodies has always been really important to me, and i think that my intentions were good in making her wait. But I started to wonder what kind message I was sending her by telling her no over and over. She really wanted it, she knew what it involved, and this was a decision she was making about her body. Here i was, telling her what she couldn't do with her own body. I realized I might not be sending the right message.

So we called a good peircing shop in our area and spoke with them. They actually don't like to pierce anyone's ears under 12, but they will make exceptions. She had to go down to the shop and talk to the piercer, where he explained pretty much the same things I had been saying to her and he wanted to make sure she was mature enough to understand that she was changing her body forever. Then she had to think about it and come back in a week. In the end, he very impressed with my daughter (who would like to think of herself as mature!) and felt that she was ready, and she still wanted to after the week was over. So she went in and got them done. She said it did hurt, but was glad to have them, even while healing.

And a side note- the standard of care for piercing care has changed radically since I was around it. More modern practice basically has you do nothing more than wash the area that's pierced as you normally would in the shower. No solutions, no turning, no touching it. You leave all that crusty stuff that forms and allow your body to heal it without interference and just keep the area around it clean. Her ears healed amazingly well, and faster then any of the peircings I so lovingly cleaned, and rotated, and treated with stuff. But there goes all that care and responsibity I was hoping the piercing would teach as an extra bonus XD

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#24 of 26 Old 06-29-2013, 09:13 PM
 
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Respectfully, a child should have their ears pierced when they can consent to modifying their body and take care of any physical challenges associated with it. Anything else is an assault on their person.

I agree. I wouldn't tattoo or circumcise a baby either.
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#25 of 26 Old 06-29-2013, 09:25 PM
 
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My L just got her done last year at almost 5...She asked and begged and pleaded...I finally made a fun day..took her to Claires and got it done...She has done just fine with them...she turns them and cleans her ears...We haven't taken them out..But she only has the earrings that she is wearing...For her 6th birthday she is getting a jewlrey box and some jewlrey(including some earrings) from my mom so we will  probably start changing them..L's Biomom bugged me for years to get her ears done but I told her no...I wanted it to be her choice..I always felt that hey what if she gets older and says what the Heck!!! I don't want holes in my ears....So I waited till she asked and I made sure she knew(I took her and let her watch ears being pierced) what would happen...

 

 

She loves her ears being pierced though :)

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#26 of 26 Old 06-29-2013, 09:49 PM
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My dd is 16.  I've asked her several times if she'd like to get her ears pierced, and the answer is always no.  I'm so glad I didn't take that choice away from her and get them pierced as a baby.

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