Touched Out - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 3 Old 08-31-2013, 07:47 AM - Thread Starter
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I've always been the non-huggy type and not much for touching in general.


Back in 2002 when I had my son, his father went away for a 1-year- remote, followed by deployments year after year, so for the first 3 years of my son's life, it was mostly just me and him.  It was nice.  We co-slept, breastfed (until he self-weaned at 2 1/2), and I had just one person's needs to meet, besides my own.


I divorced hubby #1 after 17 1/2 years (long story short: bad match, no chemistry EVER, no love, no intimacy, pr0n addiction on his part, etc.).


I immediately remarried someone who turned out to be very touchy-feely, lovey, expressive about his affections, adoring, etc.  Wonderful!  We're going on 3 years and he's still that way. 


Of course I also have my 10 1/2-year-old son, who is naturally not anywhere as touchy as he was as a baby, though he will hold my hand every so often when we are out walking.  :)


So I had a baby in January.  Silly me.  What was I thinking? 


Oh, don't get me wrong, I adore my daughter, but I am touched out.  I wake up in the morning with hubby on one side, holding me snug and saying, "MY woman!" and daughter on the other side rubbing her face all over my chest, and grinning.


It can be cute, but I need to find a way to have a little less touch in my day.


Like in the bathroom.  My daughter is clingy and if I even step away to use the toilet, she'll fuss.  Especially if I have to be gone longer because, hey, sometimes it takes longer. 


But I think I need to do that.  As much as I'm conscientious about responding to her cries, she's 7-months-old, and I'd like to go to the toilet by myself.  Sometimes, between work (at home) and baby, it's the only time I get to read a bit.  So that's what I'm going to do - start declaring toilet time MY time. 


So not looking for solutions or anything, but instead to see if others know what I mean.  Anyone else ever feel "touched out" from husband, children, etc.?  How do you keep from running away, screaming?

Mumsy to Gavin (10-year-old artsy boy) and Rowan (baby disco queen!)

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#2 of 3 Old 08-31-2013, 09:57 AM
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YES! I think I may be  a little touched out too. Dh is soooo touchy and it seems since our son two years ago he needs more and also my two year old. After being with ds all day (touches I love) by the time dh comes home and after ds has gone to bed..I just want to breath and sit on the couch alone and read. Dh has been giving me  a hard time because I don't sit next to him our don't want to rub his hair. I dunno what to do.......I am with you though and understand.

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#3 of 3 Old 09-02-2013, 04:55 PM
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Oh mamas, I hear you!
I have a 2.5 year old coming out of a NASTY virus (sores all over her mouth, gums swollen and bleeding, not eating, slurring words because of the pain and swelling - plain AWFUL virus), 5+ week old baby with mouth sores (due to gentian violet, our thrush treatment) and of course hubby. DD1 is clingy because of the illness, baby is cranky due to the pain (oh yeah and she won't latch so I'm pumping for a day or two until she feels better) and hubby is feeling rejected by DD1 so he's mopey and someone else who needs nurturing.... Oy! It's overwhelming!! The girls and I were at my mom's today and I had to run out to move the car. Let me tell you, being behind the wheel of an empty, quiet car was very appealing and I was tempted to have a brain fart and just come home alone lol. But then I got to the end of the block and circled back like a good mama wink1.gif It was 45 seconds of solitary bliss though lol
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