One year old fighting sleep - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 06-13-2014, 11:27 AM - Thread Starter
 
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One year old fighting sleep

Hi mamas. I could really use some advice and/or support right now. I'm feeling pretty exasperated about my almost one-year-old and sleep. Until recently, he took all naps in the Ergo. About a month ago we transitioned to me nursing him to sleep in our family bed for naps. It was going pretty well, except that he seems to always wake after a half hour. Then all of the sudden he seemed to be fighting all sleep, both nap times and bedtime. Now when I take him in for a nap or bed, even when he's obviously already tired, it's as if he can't stop moving. He'll nurse, then sit up abruptly, crawl around, I'll try to wrangle him into a nursing position again, he'll cry, I'll let him crawl awhile, try again, over and over, until finally he nurses to sleep (or nurses a bit then rolls over and goes to sleep). It's so exhausting for me, and I sometimes have a hard time containing my frustration. And, of course, I always think, "what am I doing wrong?" I don't like feeling like I'm wrestling him -- I strive to be respectful of him and his needs, including his need to move! -- but it seems if I don't try to contain him a little he would never sleep again. (I'm sure this isn't true, of course.) It just feels like a battle, and I'm feeling so disconnected from him lately. It makes me so very sad. Does this sound normal? Should I not try to physically contain him when he's crying/trashing/trying to escape so he can crawl more? What's the gentle and respectful thing to do in this case (while also keeping my sanity and getting him some sleep)? Thank you in advance for your thoughts.
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#2 of 10 Old 06-16-2014, 01:25 PM
 
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I would stop with the nursing if he's restless. Let him wear himself out through exploring. He's probably "waking up" to the world and too curious to be easily soothed to sleep in mama's arms. I would give toys and co-play instead of nursing to help him stay stimulated until he can't stay awake any more. Don't worry, he will wear himself out soon and sleep soundly. I did use a pacifier for this phase - it provides the suckling comfort without tying down mom when the child doesn't need fed.
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#3 of 10 Old 06-17-2014, 09:33 PM
 
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Another idea: try lying down on the bed and "napping" yourself, making the space as dark and boring as possible. Your little one can crawl around the bed until he wears himself out, then goes to sleep. You can make sure he's safe, but not make it so fun that he never wants to go to sleep. My little one sleeps in a crib but she will often spend a fair amount of time cooing and rolling around (she's 5.5 months) before she sticks her thumb in her mouth and drifts off.
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#4 of 10 Old 06-19-2014, 10:38 PM
 
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My daughter is 11 months old and this sounds just like her! It's normal. They're curious and mobile and more curious and cranky from being tired. I'm just going with the, "this will pass" mantra.
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#5 of 10 Old 06-20-2014, 10:14 AM
 
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I was literally coming on here for the same advice/empathy. My super mobile almost 9 month old is the same. He used to fall asleep pretty easily as soon as he started showing signs that he was tired. Sometimes he nursed to sleep, sometimes I would just lay down next to him, sometimes I could sit him on my lap and pat his back for a couple minutes. I could actually walk away once his eyes started fluttering. Now, it is a battle. The ONLY way to get him to sleep if there is any light is to wear him on my back in the ergo once "nap time" approaches then I maneuver him into his crib once he is limp. Once in a blue moon I get an hour nap out of him. Usually its 15minutes to 1/2 hr. This business is totally exhausting and I totally feel like I must be doing something wrong. He is also still waking up every couple hours to nurse at night, which just makes the whole thing even more frustrating and exhausting.
My older son wasn't much better as a baby (battle to fall asleep though he would nap for 2+ hours every time, then woke up all night long needing to be soothed back to sleep) so either I'm doing the same stuff wrong again or this is a phase and eventually it will end. I'm just trying to amp myself up for another year plus of the battle. I have a hard time falling alseep and I'm a light sleeper so I wonder if it might be a hereditary thing.

Sorry I don't have a solution for you but I do feel your pain

mama to two little men...3/25/2010 and 10/3/2013
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#6 of 10 Old 06-25-2014, 03:08 PM
 
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Naps are a struggle here too, unless I'm holding my daughter/nursing throughout/sleeping next to her. I'm working on getting her to nap alone in our bed, but it's an uphill battle :/ She'll usually sleep for 20-30 mins at best if I roll away from her.

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#7 of 10 Old 06-25-2014, 08:47 PM
 
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We had phase one of this a few months back when my dd was just learning to crawl, and it just started up again. I tried e let her crawl around me in the dark thing, but it was going crazy because it takes so long sometimes and my presence is too tempting for her. I started leaving her alone in her room during this time to settle down on her own. She lets me know when she needs me back, if she needs me back.

I noticed with my kid that after a while nursing to sleep really stopped working. It's too passive a position for some active kids. Also, my dd doesn't like falling asleep to sucking because it startles her to wake up alone. I started months ago pulling away earlier and earlier in the process of sucking to sleep. Now she fusses a little when sucking to sleep is interrupted, but just rolls over, gets comfy, and goes to sleep. If I get distracted and let her fall to the limp stage while sucking, she wakes up in 30 mins startled and upset to not be where she was when she fell asleep.

Her best naps are always in bed, when she falls asleep in those last few seconds without aid.

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#8 of 10 Old 06-26-2014, 12:13 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by faithrainbow View Post
Another idea: try lying down on the bed and "napping" yourself, making the space as dark and boring as possible. Your little one can crawl around the bed until he wears himself out, then goes to sleep. You can make sure he's safe, but not make it so fun that he never wants to go to sleep. My little one sleeps in a crib but she will often spend a fair amount of time cooing and rolling around (she's 5.5 months) before she sticks her thumb in her mouth and drifts off.
Same here, this is what I also do with my children and it works out pretty well.
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#9 of 10 Old 06-26-2014, 12:19 PM
 
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Wow thanks for thest tips guys, I was struggling with the same issue as OP...
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#10 of 10 Old 07-02-2014, 06:54 AM
 
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cool, I started leaving her alone in her room during this time to settle down on her own. She lets me know when she needs me back, if she needs me back.thanks
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