As for DTD, um yeah...we've pretty much resumed our usual level of activity. Surely I'm not the only one?!? Y'all make me feel like some sex crazed nymphomaniac!
We gave it a try right at the two week mark- by that point my bleeding had more or less stopped and my small tear was already healed. I was quite pleasently surprised at how great it felt. No discomfort whatsoever. Yay!
Thia- Miles has had several baths and LOVES them. Honestly, I think that he is at his absolute most relaxed state when he is in the tub- maybe it has something to do with being born underwater? Anyhow, we don't have a baby bath tub. I just fill up our bathroom tub with warm water, climb on in, and then have my husband hand me the baby. He loves being submerged so that just his little face is above water- should I really be concerned about water getting in his ears? Oh, and nursing during our bath is really relaxing to both of us!
For what its worth, he also seems to enjoy showers!
As for birth control, we're just sticking with condoms. Not my favorite thing in the world but oh well. I loved the carefree, sponteneous sex of pregnancy without worrying about birth control. A neighbor has an eight month old daughter and is already pregnant again- her second baby is due one week before her daughter's 1st birthday!! She was breastfeeding when the new baby was concieved, so when my husband heard about this he exclaimed, "I love you sweetie, but there's no way in hell my penis is going anywhere near you without a condom!"
It's funny how hormones work. For the past 3 days I have been feeling so tired and mommyed out. I really wanted a break. And out of the blue today I woke up feeling really good, and have been really enjoying my boys again. Even Harrison's crying hasn't bothered me at all today. I can't think of anything that I did differently, but for some reason I'm feeling calm and relaxed today... I'm blaming the hormones.
EPO: I am taking 4 1000mg capsules a day. 2 in the morning and 2 at night. I've found them really useful in taking the edge off the hormone swings. Dh can tell on the days that I've forgotten to take it.
green poops: my midwife told me that green poops are an indicator that the baby's not getting enough fatty hind milk and to have the baby nurse for longer on one breast. I was also told that sometimes baby's just have green poops.
FutureMama - I am pleased to see I'm not the only sex crazed nymphomaniac around here. Dh and I have resumed our usual level of activity too, much to our relief.
as for BC... well I may be a total idiot but I'm not going to worry about it for a while. My period didn't resume until Alias was 17 months old so I'm working under the assumption that I'm "safe" for at least 6 months. Then... well I don't know. We got pregnant using a diaphram, and I refuse to use condoms (hate hate hate them). We're seriously considering a vasectomy but it's such a big decision. We don't plan on having more kids but I'm not sure we're mentally ready to take steps to close that door forever.
I'm on a wonderful herbal cocktail that my mw made for me, so I haven't had any sign of the ppd this time. I may get cranky from a bad night of lots of nursing, but not that inner despair that I felt w/ Logan.
Um, being a mom of 2 is challenging for me to say the least. I find myself losing my temper easily with Logan. This is because Logan will start acting out and slamming things or shrieking on purpose while the baby's sleeping. And Logan is asking to nurse a lot now that there's lots of milk- and when the baby is finally done that's the last thing I want to do. So, I'm limiting him to 2 times a day- even that feels like too much. I don't think he'll ever want to wean. He throws a fit when I tell him he needs to wait till I get the baby back to sleep, or change the diaper etc.
So, I'm a little frazzled, but all in all doing okay. I'm really looking forward to the baby getting a bit older and being able to smile (for real) and stuff. Zander's putting on wait like crazy btw, he's about 11 pounds now.
(((Hugs))) to you Nancy re: your labor flashbacks and MIL Oh, man I had some of the same toilet contraction nightmares that you did. It made it very hard to go to the bathroom when the cntrx hit as soon as I sat down. I looked at the pictures and Henry is beautiful. He does look very peaceful.
and (((Hugs))) to you Meli as well. I'm just so glad that you're sleeping again! You really do have to take care of yourself first in order to be able to be a good mom. I'm sure once you get through this time of grieving bfing and adjusting to formula, you'll feel even better.
I really want to DTD with dh but we're only at 3 weeks, and I don't want to risk infection (I guess that's the risk, right?)- the lochia hasn't stopped yet.
BC- I'll be getting the Mirena IUD, but seriously I really want to get my tubes tied. I really think we're done. I just want older kids only who sleep all night long.
Talk to yall later!
Mom to two boys, 7 and 10. Expecting 3rd boy any day now with DH (his first).
My brother came over tonight, and when he walked in the door, I was BFing. He said, "Oh, oops. Sorry." and looked up at the ceiling. He just stood there staring up at the ceiling. I was like, "Um, dude. It's gonna be a long couple of years if you won't look at me when I feed Levi." He eventually started making eye contact, but I could tell he was really uncomfortable all evening. I felt all pressured to be discreet. I couldn't wait for him to go home so I could whip out my huge boobies in peace.
Thia - Have you tried getting into the tub with the baby? Just fill up the tub and hold her in there with you. My ds hates the baby tub, too. But he liked taking a warm bath with mama.
As for birth control, I really don't know what we will do. Once my cycles return, we will do NFP again. Is it silly to just chance it till then...? It took us a year to conceive Levi and we had to chart and use real eggwhites vaginally to do it, so I don't think we are that fertile. Dh REALLY doesn't want anymore bio kids though, he only wants to fost/adopt. So we are loosely considering vasectomy, too. We're only in our mid 20s though and I am afraid we will change our minds down the road.
chantal, i guess EPO is used for depression after pg i guess....
ok the problems have began.... ...it's about the diapers....i am washin ds's cloths more than his diapers.......his poops and everything gets out of the diaper and stains everything around...i even tried to put two diapers on the top of each other...but didn't help....im hysterical at changing him....i check almost every hour...(is it what im supposed to do??? ) and still all his cloths are wet....please please any suggestions!!!! maybe i just have bad diapers....
add me to the list of bad mood wives....didn't sleep well last night and just yelled at dh because he was remindin me to eat...
to all mamas with two (or more) kids....you are REALLY strong....i can't imagine it with two kids....but me and dh were planning for 8...!!!
when will it be safe for ds to take a bath with dh????? he is one week tomorrow...(yay ) and his navel almost completlyy dried (fell off and healed) ...do u think it is safe since next week or so??
can i just share? dd "nursed" elmo today. first time i've seen her do that. dh was so excited, lol. my little boobie girl!
Homeschooling, Homesteading Mama to DD ('02) and DS ('04)
Court, I totally hear you on the nursing thing. I have had to limit Heidi's nursing to 2-3 times a day (morning, nap and night), and I don't let her nurse anymore than that. It was just driving me crazy, I feel like the nursing aversion is just so strong. It is just so hard to nurse a toddler after nursing a newborn all the time.
We have been doing pretty well with 2 kids, the hardest thing is doing naptime and bedtime. Espeicially bedtime, Greta seems to be at her fussiest right when Heidi goes to bed and the only thing that calms her is for me to sling and nurse her walking around. And, of course Heidi wants to nurse and me to put her to bed as well. So, that has been tricky. What we have been doing is me nursing Heidi quickly in the short time when Greta is calm and then DH lying down with her to put her to sleep. But it is still hard when 2 kids have 2 needs and it is impossible to meet both of them at the same time. I can't nurse, sling and walk while nursing and lying down at the same time. :LOL
I also do the baby bath with me, and she loves it. Actually DD1, DD2 and I all take a bath together. It is very relaxing and DD1 "helps" wash DD2.
Katie, sorry your brother was so uncomfortable. I am sure he will get over it if he sees you nursing a lot.
I don't think it is silly to just chance it until cycles return. That is what we did with Heidi and what we will do this time, although if I notice lots of eggwhite or fertile mucous we will avoid until Greta is eating lots of solids and I feel she could tolerate a pregnancy induced weaning or drop in milk supply. But breastfeeding worked really well for spacing our kids 2 years and 8 months apart, we never really did anything to TTA, and still didn't get pregnant until almost 2 years. Plus, we also want a big family, not sure how many kids, but I think if we are lucky we can probably get in a 5 or 6 before I just get too old.
Originally Posted by ameliabedelia
It is just so hard to nurse a toddler after nursing a newborn all the time.
|We have been doing pretty well with 2 kids, the hardest thing is doing naptime and bedtime. Espeicially bedtime, ...But it is still hard when 2 kids have 2 needs and it is impossible to meet both of them at the same time. I can't nurse, sling and walk while nursing and lying down at the same time.|
emily's been having these moods where she doesn't want dh, pushes him away, saying in tears for him to (basically) go away. i have felt it is not about dh - she adores him and has a blast with him - but more she's hitting a wall in her ability to communicate what she is feeling. I think I finally figured out last night that she sees being handed over to DH as being "pawned off" on him, taken from my affections. her "rejection" of him is a demand for my attention. when he comes up to her and says "hi sweetie" its like she's immediately suspicious and defensive. "no, you aren't going to take me away from mama right now" (even though he'd suggest no such thing). It makes me feel awful that she is feeling that way in the first place, like she has to fight to stay with me at that moment.
sigh. most days, most moments, are great. but there are times when I feel guilty for just not being able to meet both their needs at once.
oh, one bright spot: dh had a very promising job interview yesterday afternoon. he's going back next weekto meet the "big boss". it would be a great opportunity for him, and I'm keeping fingers and toes crossed, while at the same time not wanting to get my hopes up, y'know?
Homeschooling, Homesteading Mama to DD ('02) and DS ('04)
Originally Posted by Court
Um, being a mom of 2 is challenging for me to say the least. I find myself losing my temper easily with Logan.
Originally Posted by Court
So, I'm a little frazzled, but all in all doing okay.
Dh is still home from work (thank God) and I'm starting to freak out about the day he'll go back. I've been alonw with both kids many times but not usually for more than 4 hours at a time. How do you do it mamas?? I'll be back in about 3 weeks (when DH is supposed to back to work) freaking out to you all I'm sure
Must go, Leo wakes.
Wait, one more thing my babies are just the sweetest things ever - I am in love even if I sound whiney and freaked out by them
Willow saw her first movie last night. well, slept through her first movie my husband works at a movie theater so we get free movies, i'd seen 6-8 a month during my whole pregnancy and Willow always fell asleep in the belly. i used a thick burp cloth folded just right to make sure her ears were well covered to muffle the sound. the moment the previews started, she smiled and settled down to sleep! :LOL i guess she still loves the vibrations she felt so often in the womb (that'd also explain why she's always liked more vigorous rocking/swinging!) she woke once to eat, Pan took her out for a dipe change and a bottle, she fell asleep again so he came back in. he missed the whole middle of the movie but he said it was worth it to help me do something to ease the depression of not being able to nurse her. we saw "The Grudge" i just love Japanese horror movies!
we're figuring out the bottle thing. i used the Medela bottles that i got as a breastmilk storage/feeding kit, rather than the Avent ones. the Medelas have a Nuk-like nipple and she eats much more slowly, and falls gently asleep at the end of the feeding. it feels more like i'm 'nursing' her with these bottles. it was so nice to see a happy look on her face instead of a frantic one and she still loves me singing Beatles songs, i need to print out lyrics i can't remember them all! :LOL
i'm in awe of you moms with more than one kid, WOW. y'all are doing such great things it must be so fun to watch the older kids and remember when they were tiny like the babies.
i'm going back on my old BC pill OrthoNovum 28 at my postpartum checkup. DTD is the last thing on my mind although we do get intimate when we can.
will we eventually be able to co-sleep in the same bed if Willow is bottle-fed? right now she can't even stand to lie on my chest or be skin-to-skin with me, because i still smell like milk i guess. i miss sleeping with her in the crook of my arm!
today is her one-month checkup the only concern i have right now is that she's still not gazing at our faces or any other thing for more than a second or two. i thought a 4-wk-old could focus on a face, or even mimic facial expressions? she always stares to one side or the other, like off in the distance. otherwise i think she's pretty healthy.
Willow (6) says: "Mother Earth is the mother of all mothers"
♥ Phoenix (6/2011) ♥ print-n-color mandalas >
Oh yeah, mothering 2 is hard! Every single day I am soooo grateful that Dh has taken parental leave from his work until Jan 15th. I would not be able to do his without his help. I still have to be primary parent to both boys, but I don't have to worry abot the house cleaning and the meals. I am so burnt out by the end of the day I would probably go absolutly mad if I had to worry myself with the daily household chores on top of everything else.
One really nice development is that Harrison has now become old enough that he does not have to nap on me all the time. I still rock and snuggle him to sleep but now, as long as I put him in his swing, Harrison will stay asleep on his own for almost half an hour. When I'm not using the time to focus all my attention on Alias I can now sit down and have a warm meal, or have a long hot shower, or visit MDC . The little 30 minute break in my day is making a huge difference in my attitude. I know this isn't very MDC of me but hey, I LOVE THAT SWING!!!!
Melli - I love that you are singing Willow Beatles songs. We here are huge fans too (Harrison is named after George Harrison). One of Alias' favourite songs is Yellow Submarine (loves the movie too) and he already asks me from time to time "mummy, where's Ringo?" I'm predicting that in 14 years or so I'm going to be getting a call from LA from Alias telling me he won't be home for dinner as he's looking for RIngo Starr's house.
Originally Posted by mirthfulmum
The little 30 minute break in my day is making a huge difference in my attitude. I know this isn't very MDC of me but hey, I LOVE THAT SWING!!!!
|amelia, how did you explain it to heidi?|
Anyway,when she would ask to nurse, I would just tell her that mama loves her but we can't nurse right now. I just keep repeating that. If I could put Greta down for a few mintues, I would pick her up and carry her and just walk with her around the house for a few minutes. Sometimes I would even put her in the Kozy or sling and just walk around with her. I think she sees being carried and in the Kozy or sling as special since she isn't carried much anymore. She walks almost everywhere, we rarely carry her, so being held and carried I think makes her feel loved and secure and babyish similar to nursing, plus Greta is a real sling baby and several times a day goes through these periods where she is only happy in the sling, so Heidi is used to seeing Greta in the sling, so when she gets slung and carried, it makes her feel loved and special. I would also try to distract her, sometimes I would start to recite her favorite book "a mother bird sat on an egg, the egg jumped...." and she would get caught up in that and would go to get that book to have me read it to her. Also, for other times when she was used to nursing, like right after the nap, I would plan something to go distract her. Like as soon as she got up, I would help her get dressed and we would go outside to go to a park or a play area or something and I would immediately work on getting both kids dressed and ready to immediately go outside and do something fun. And now that we have been limiting her for the past week or so, she has been asking much, much less.
I am afraid I have been doing lots of non-MDC things. Like I actually bought a paci for Greta to use in the car, since she cries in the car and the only things that calms her is to put our fingers in her mouth. Really unsafe if I am driving and by myself with her. And, even if not, it is uncomfortable to reach your hand back to her from the front seat (and with 2 carseats in the back, there isn't room for any adult to sit back there, so neither of us could really sit back there), But, alas she doesnt' like the paci anyway, so it isn't any help. She much prefers our fingers to the paci. We don't have a swing, but I have thought about getting one.
Like today... I feel so helpless when I can't figure out what my sweet needs. Gassyness in a baby SUCKSSSSS!!!! when is it easier for them just to FART for peats sake?! Yeesh.
As far as swings go not here, I'm lucky if he'll sit in his little bucket seat long enough for me to get a drink! I'm very thankful for slings! What do mama's without them do? We drove for 20 minutes yesterday with me draping my arm across the backseat for Reed to suck on my pinky! It was so uncomfy, but the thought of plugging his mouth with a piece of plastic that will probably be found to be cancerous someday gives me the willys. I wish it didn't. Car rides would be so much easier
Court, I can relate to the extra "little boy" noises. I gently motion to Miles to please quiet down, and he gets louder. How passive aggressive huh? I try not to say anything now. I don't want anything to develop.
Ashlee, the dynamics of your relationship with your dh are me and mine to a T! He totally retreats into himself, and I become super needy. Not a good combo.
Gotta love the nurse athons, I read a book in 2 days do to prolonged nursing! It was the Life Of Pi... Pretty gory in some parts. Book club next Monday. Can't wait to show Reed off, and we meet at an Irish pub, so I get to have a nice brewsky!!! (just one )
Anyone else spend a couple days constipated!? My dh asks "when you have to go, why don't you just go" He just doesn't get it, and if I don't go when I have to, well, it takes a while to come back. Ah the joys of motherhood!
Momadance: Yeah, I was a little constipated for just a few days when Miles was born. I ended up taking a stool softner for three or four days and it worked wonders!
Oh, and if anyone is interested I uploaded a few pictures of my sweet baby on the yahoo group website...I just have to show off my little man!
eta that I just figured out how to set up a Snapfish account and put the link to it in my signature!
we dont' have a swing, but who do you think is in his bouncy seat right now so i can type twohanded? bassinet, bouncy seat. if he didn't zonk out every time we got in the car i would be tempted for the paci. like amelia, there's no room back there for an adult. i used to nurse dd in her seat! but i cant' fit there with two car seats. anyways, you do what you have to and it's not like we're all dumping them in plastic all day long. if anythign we all probably guilt out so much about it we don't use them half as much as we could, lol.
momadance: had to LOL at your farting comment. i hear ya! my boy is so gassy. at least he burps (dd was impossible to burp, but also wasn't very gassy). sasha stops regularly through nursings and needs to be burped. it's kind of fun hearing this loud belch from such a small guy! but the farting/pooping straining sounds like no fun. i wish he had an easier time passing gas that way. i mean hey - he's a GUY right, shouldn't burping and farting just come naturally?
Homeschooling, Homesteading Mama to DD ('02) and DS ('04)
I wanted to say I hear ya on the baby things. I've been using the bouncy seat a lot. Also, If she's sleeping I just leave her in her co-sleeper instead of puting her in the kozy or somewhere else. It makes it a bit easier to clean and get other things done. I haven't brought up the swing yet. It's a bit big for our tiny place but I'm not ruling it out.
Oh for those of you looking to wean. I had to wean Liam because his teeth were seriously decaying rapidly. Poor guy now has caps and crowns on his teeth. I weaned him over several months. I used Dr. Jay Gordon's method in his book Good Nights. It's the most gentle loving method. It's just gradualy cutting a seesion out every other day or what is in the child's comfort level. It worked well for us. The hardest one for Liam to give up was the ones to go to bed and the one to go for his nap. Everything else wasn't that big of a struggle for him. I think we started this around 18 months. It's very heartbreaking to go through but I really had to for his teeth.
I've used a paci here and there for Tara. She doesn't like it that much.
Meli- I saw you were thinking of starting to cloth diaper. I found the best prices for things are right here on the trading post. A lot of the Moms will trade or negotiate their prices. I bought a ton of newborn/little baby cloth diaper stuff becuase I didn't start until Liam was a year old.
Well I think I've got the hang of this 2 kid thing. It's hard but I'm enjoying it.
to all of us having a hard time.
Off to go snuggle my lil dumplin.
I have to agree with everyone.. mothering 2 kids is hard! I had gotten used to not beeing needed 24/7 as DS got to be independant.. able to play on his own a bit etc.. but now it is back to being needed 100% of the time.. every second of the day and night.. And DH was across country for a week.. so it was really hard dealing with a newborn and a preschooler alone..
Last night was our last night alone.. and I totally lost it with DS.. completely lost my temper and was a raving lunatic.. : It was over a dinner/eating battle and that so pushes my buttons on a good day.. and it wasn't a good day...
I felt awful after the fact.. I feel like I am turning into my mother...
I am having leaking problems with dipes too.. I think it might be my covers.. I got nearly all of them used and I think the PUL is gone on some.. not sure how to tell though. Mostly DD leaks around the inner legs....
Hope everyone has a nice weekend
to all you women who have husbands who are traveling, working insane hours and going to school. Way to go super mommas!
I posted photos of sweet baby Mason on the Yahoo Group. I had to show him off...He's just awesome!
We were at the dr for her checkup yesterday and we also got a script for that yellow stuff that starts with an "n" for the thrush. I will also continue with the grapefruit seed extract and acidopholus. I need to find a new ped though. This one talked down to me big time on just about everything. Also, he is very big on vaxs and sticking to the schedule. I am thinking of delaying those we do decide to get. Also, he starts babies on solids at 4 months! Even the big American peds board doesn't recommend that! So, I am dr hunting.
For those who are constipated...prune juice. I hate the stuff, but treat it like medicine. I actually cut it with water too. A small juice glass a day or every other day can make all the difference. And I think some of that gets passed onto dd too b/c I think she has an easier time as well.
I love my maya wrap! Had dd in it when we were about town the past two days and it made everything so much easier as well as protected her. There are a lot of people here that have never seen one so I get a lot of double takes and questions. I put it on under my coat before we leave the house and just slip her from the car seat to the sling.
Still sleep deprived here. She stays awake a lot more than she did a month ago! I try to sleep when she does, but during the day she only cat naps. Her first sleep of the night usually comes right after I have eated dinner and am too full to sleep.
please somebody expalin to me that diaper cover thing...don't get it...these dipes are driving me crazy...i posted on the diaper forum and they helped me to understand what i am using here in Japan...but still...problem goes on...they just leak on everything....are covers to cover them??? do I just ask for covers in the stores???
Thia, your baby looks similar to mine... moodwise i mean...
Court, I can't post my pictures on yahoo....everytime i try to do upload they tell me I can't access that breifcase...: ...what does it mean???
Ekatherina - you need to cover your diaper with a water resistant diaper cover that fits snuggly over top of your cloth diaper. Other wise every time Ousama pees or poops it'll soak all the way thru the cotton diaper and you'll have a soaking wet baby. Here's a link to the diaper covers I use. It'll give you some idea as to what I'm talking about. So yeah, I would suspect that you could go to the store where you purchased your diapers and ask then for a diaper cover. And by the way you'll need to buy at the very least three as they do get poop and pee on them and need to be washed often.
Oh and just came across this care for diapers link, it may also be helpful for you.
bottle feeding still feels horrible to me. but Willow is eating heartily, she's peaceful during feedings and not spitting up hardly at all. i'm sleeping whenever i'm tired now, napping when the baby naps. i have no idea why this medicine works so well, i'm glad that it does but i hate that i need it the kellymom site had great tips on bottlefeeding a breastfed baby, meant for EBM but works for formula. i hold her and sing to her while she eats and she grabs my fingers or pats my hands, she's starting to look at my face more, i can't stop kissing her lil fuzzy peach head. but ugh that
F-stuff tastes horrible to me! i dunno how she can stand it.
Willow still won't sleep flat, she doesn't have reflux so i'm guessing it's just her personality? we end up putting the carrier in the co-sleeper! after her 7 a.m. feeding she wants her swing, it's right next to the bed also so i half-nap while she sleeps. i feel so damn guilty using the swing, but wow she loves it. the rest of the day she's in our arms or Daddy wears her in the sling (she still won't tolerate it on me, i still smell like milk). we figured she's in someone's arms at least 8 hours a day and when not in arms, we're singing to her or talking to her while we cook or clean while she sits in her bouncy seat. still, i just want to wear her in the sling all day!
does anyone else have a babe that won't sleep flat? is it related to how small she is i wonder?
oh and UGH if i hear "omigod she's so small!" one more time in public i am going to punch someone. we're both overweight so people give us "that look" when they see how small she is, almost as if to say "well y'all are huge why is your baby so tiny?" *bleh*
Willow (6) says: "Mother Earth is the mother of all mothers"
♥ Phoenix (6/2011) ♥ print-n-color mandalas >